Frederick's Queen: The Clan Graham Series

by Suzan Tisdale

  IT WAS NOT an easy subject for Aggie to broach. She had waited until after the evening meal with the hope that her husband, as most men, would be more amiable and better suited to making decisions on a full and happy stomach.

  Ian and Findal had graciously accepted her request to allow Ailrig to share their room. “’Twill be a tight fit, but we’ll manage,” Findal had said. Ailrig was delighted with the idea. So while Frederick was out doing whatever it was that kept him busy most days, Aggie and Ailrig moved his things—meager as they were—to the room across the hall.

  “Where be Ailrig?” Frederick asked as he removed his belt and sword and laid them atop their bed.

  “He be dinin’ with Ian and Findal,” she told him as she set bowls of stew and a platter of bread on his desk.

  Frederick washed up in the basin, dried off his hands and face, and then joined her at the desk. “Stew again?” he asked, sounding a bit deflated as he looked at the contents of the bowl.

  Aggie wished she could offer him a feast each night. Mayhap, if she was able to purchase her mother’s things back from Clair, she would have enough money left over to buy two pigs. In a year’s time, they would have enough that she could feed him more than rabbit stew.

  “Well,” Frederick said as he dipped a bit of bread into the bowl. “’Tis better than porritch!”

  The poor man, she thought. She could see that he’d lost a bit of weight since coming here. On the morrow, she decided, she would see about having a few eggs prepared for his breakfast.

  “How was yer day?” he asked, taking a bite of stew.

  “Good,” she answered. Her mind quickly returned to the topic she needed to discuss with him. Suddenly, her appetite disappeared. How would she go about telling him she did not wish him to sleep in the chair or on the floor? Letting loose a sigh, she supposed it was simply best to get straight to the heart of the matter.

  “Frederick?” she said before taking a sip of cider. “I want to d-discuss somethin’ with ye.”

  “Verra well, lass. What is on yer mind?”

  Aggie took a deep breath. “Well, it’s about where y-ye sleep.”

  His smile faded. Setting his spoon down, he turned to give her his full attention. “Aye,” he said, looking quite serious.

  “Well,” she cleared her throat. “I think y-ye should n-no’ be sleepin’ in a chair.”

  She saw something flash in his eyes, but wasn’t quite certain what it was. Embarrassment?

  “I mean, ye should—ye c-can—sleep in the bed. Ailrig will b-be sharin’ the room with F-findal and Ian now.”

  He blinked a few times and appeared as though he were searching his mind for something.

  “I am n-no’ suggestin’ anythin’ n-need happen between us,” she told him as she turned her attention back to her stew. Supposing he might be worried that she was suggesting they finally consummate their marriage—and there was no doubt in her mind that he had no true interest in an intimate relationship with her—she tried to put his mind at ease. Though she wouldn’t object to receiving a kiss, she doubted he was ready yet for anything more than that.

  WHEN SHE HAD first made the suggestion that he sleep in the bed with her, Frederick thought that mayhap, they had reached a turning point in their relationship. But when she clarified her offer by saying she was not suggesting that anything should happen between them, he felt some measure of relief. It surprised him that he felt that way.

  Aye, he found her quite bonny – beautiful actually. To the point of distraction which bordered on madness.

  Although he did wish for a physical relationship with her, so much so that it kept him up at night and caused him many a trip to the loch to help douse his strong desire for her, he did not think she was ready to take that step yet. He felt relieved because he did not want to injure her heart by turning down any offers to join with her.

  While it was true they had made great strides of late, and all going in the right direction, Frederick still felt they had many more miles to travel together before they could arrive at what he was certain would be a most glorious destination.

  “I thank ye kindly, Aggie,” he said. “I’ve had a crick in me neck fer some time from sleepin’ in the chair.”

  She cast him an apologetic look that made him smile. “Do no’ fash over it, lass. I’ve slept in worse places.”

  “Why have ye b-been sleepin’ in the chair?” she asked.

  Should he tell her the truth, that he was a lustful lecher of a man and sleeping next to her would be a temptation he did not think he could control? Or, should he lie. Though he had promised to always be truthful, deep down he was a coward when it came to matters of a more delicate nature. “I did no’ want to disturb ye while ye healed.”

  “But me b-back has b-been fine fer a time,” she said.

  “Aye,” he answered with a nod. “And ye did have wee Ailrig in the bed with ye.”

  He watched as she thought on it for a few moments. “Well, then, it b-be settled. Ye and I c-can share the b-bed.”

  “Good. And I thank ye kindly, Aggie.” And I promise to be a perfect gentleman. And if temptation rears its ugly head, I shall leave the bed immediately and seek out the cold loch.

  Twenty-Two

  WITH RENEWED ENERGY and newfound strength, Aggie joined Frederick and Ailrig in the gathering room to break their fast. Silence settled across those people already present the moment the three of them entered. The silence hung like thick morning fog as they made their way to the dais. It was far too early for Mermadak or his men to be in attendance. That fact alone helped ease Aggie’s nerves.

  Apparently, the events of the prior evening were still fresh in everyone’s minds. None more so than Aggie’s. With Frederick’s declaration of fealty to her and her people, she felt brave. Not quite fearless, but brave nonetheless.

  They took seats at the dais and waited patiently for food to be brought to their table. Aggie took note that Frederick’s men still sat at tables on the right side of the room. The other tables, where her father’s men had sat the night before, were noticeably empty. Knowing those men as she did, they were either still sleeping off all the ale and whisky undoubtedly consumed the night before. Or they were plotting ways to squeeze more money out of the already depleted resources of the keep. Either way, she was glad that they were not here.

  Bowls of porridge, a plate of bread, and a few dried figs were soon brought to their table by Mrs. Alaman. The woman was in her late forties, short and squat. Her once dark red hair had grown lighter over the years and was now more a strawberry blonde. Aggie had watched the once beautiful woman age not so gracefully over the years. Her husband had died long ago, leaving her with four little ones who were now all grown and living on their own.

  Aggie thanked her kindly and took a piece of bread from the platter. There was no butter or tasty jams to spread on the cold bread. Though Aggie was quite used to such fare, her husband, as could be plainly seen on his face, was not.

  “Porritch, again?” he asked incredulously as he stared down at the bowl of goo.

  Mrs. Alaman looked at him as if he were daft. “Aye, m’laird.”

  “But have we no eggs? No ham? No butter or jam?”

  Mrs. Alaman cast a sideways glance at Aggie before answering. “Nay.”

  Frederick sighed as he looked at Aggie. “How do ye eat this day after day?”

  “Ye’ll get used to it,” Ailrig answered for her. “When yer hungry enough, ye’ll eat anythin’.” He spooned a bite of porridge into his mouth.

  Frederick sighed and shook his head in dismay. Aggie rested a hand on his arm. “We used to have ham, eggs, b-butter and jam to b-break our fast. ’Twasn’t always this way.”

  As if that explained everything. “Let me guess. Mermadak sold all the pigs and chickens.”

  Aggie giggled. “Aye, he sold the p-pigs. B-but we still have chickens.”

  Frederick knew he’d regret asking his next question. “Then why do we have no eggs?”
<
br />   “We s-save them fer other things. They b-be older hens, ye ken, and d-do no lay like they used t-to.”

  Meat rations were bad enough. But egg rations? It was beyond the pale. Frederick made a mental note to remedy the lack of eggs and ham as soon as possible. He’d swallow his pride and write to his father begging for funds if he must. But he would find a way to bring better food to the tables.

  He pushed his bowl of porridge away. He simply could not stomach one more bowl of it. Every morning for weeks now, it was the same. Porridge, cold bread, and one dried fruit or another. No wonder Mermadak’s men never trained. They didn’t have the strength!

  “Are ye goin’ to eat that?” Ailrig asked hopefully.

  Frederick rolled his eyes, shook his head, and passed the bowl to the boy. “Help yerself, laddie.”

  “Thank ye!” Ailrig said cheerfully, as if Frederick had just passed him a plate full of venison.

  They sat in silence, with Frederick picking at the bread, Ailrig eating like a starved wolf, and Aggie doing her best not to laugh at his distress.

  “Pray tell, lady wife, what will ye be doin’ this day?” Frederick asked.

  “I s-suppose I shall go b-back to our room and sew. And ye?”

  “Do ye no’ get tired of bein’ in our room all the day long?” he asked as he looked around the room. “Mayhap ye might enjoy sitting here in the gatherin’ room, by the fire, to do yer sewin’? I imagine Rose be tired of bein’ cooped up as well.”

  Aggie carefully placed her spoon on the table and her hands in her lap, feeling a bit frustrated with him. She would have loved to have pointed out that it had been on his direct order, a month ago, that she stay to her rooms for her convalescence and then after for her safety. As he was clearly distracted by something this morn, she decided to simply agree and avoid an argument.

  “As ye wish,” she told him.

  “It also looks to be a fine day ahead of us. Mayhap ye could find a place out of doors to do yer sewin’, if it pleases ye? I could have Rognall and Peter take chairs out fer ye, or a blanket. I believe ye do like bein’ out of doors?” His eyes darted around the room as he sat reclined in the chair, his chin resting on his index finger.

  “As ye wish,” she repeated. “Mayhap later, we c-could g-go fer a ride on m-me unicorn?”

  Frederick nodded his head. “That be a fine idea.”

  Aggie raised an inquisitive brow. Where was his mind this morn?

  Ailrig had finished his meal, drank down what little milk had been poured into his cup and smacked his lips. “Be ye ready, Frederick?” he asked as he scurried from the bench.

  “Aye, laddie, I am,” Frederick said as he, too, stood to his feet. He searched the room, found Rognall, caught the man’s attention and waved him forward.

  Aggie was beginning to feel quite ignored and again, had to ask where his mind might be. Worry began to settle in. Was there, mayhap, something going on that he did not want her to worry over? He did not necessarily seem worried, simply distracted. Then again, she didn’t know the man as well as she thought she should after nearly a month of marriage. Typically she was quite good at reading another’s moods. Measuring Frederick’s moods was not at all easy. Unless he was being impatient or kind. She was growing more and more frustrated.

  Rognall approached the table. “Good day, mistress,” he said with a bow to Aggie.

  Aggie returned his salutations and smiled.

  “Rognall,” Frederick said. “Me wife would like to sit out of doors this morn to sew. Could ye and Peter see to it that she and Rose have fine chairs and blankets and anything else they need?”

  “Aye, we shall,” Rognall said, looking both relieved and happy. Aggie wondered perhaps, if he was growing tired of standing guard in a dark hallway for most of his days.

  Frederick turned to Aggie, lifted her hand and kissed it. “Whatever ye wish, ye tell Rognall or Peter and they’ll see that ye have it. I shall see ye at the noonin’ meal, me lady wife.”

  A flutter of something warm and exciting tickled at her belly when he took her hand and kissed it. When he looked up and into her eyes, she caught a familiar look, a flicker of something she could not name nor describe. “Enjoy yer day, me lady wife,” he said before standing to walk away.

  Aggie sat dumbfounded for a moment as she watched him walk away. He was a big man, well-muscled, and his calves! Och! She hadn’t noticed those before and how they strained inside his boots as if they were fighting to be set free. Coming or going, he was a fine man.

  Her face grew warm, awash in the embarrassment of how fine looking a man she thought him to be. She was quite glad he was walking away for then he could not see her face or hear her gulp.

  He stopped suddenly and turned to speak. “And Rognall! See to it that me wife has time to ride her unicorn!”

  A devious smile sprouted on his lips whilst Aggie’s shoulders slumped ever so slightly. The dastardly man had been listening!

  “WILL YE AT least try fer me Aggie?” Frederick asked as they stood in the center of their bedchamber. “I promise, if ye begin to grow afraid, we’ll return to the confines of the keep.”

  He was doing his best to convince her to walk with him. Outside the walls. Aggie understood that it was important that she get over the fear she had of being out in the open. She also understood that she was not a child anymore. Further still, she understood how important this was to her husband.

  However, understanding a thing and being able to confront it were two entirely different things. The woman inside her, the woman full grown that was desperately fighting to escape, truly did want to be able to walk through the gate of the keep without feeling like she’d wet herself. That full grown woman, the one that had been slowly blossoming, breaking through the thick walls of safety that Aggie had built over the years, was shouting like a banshee to be heard, to be set free.

  The fearful young woman, the one that reminded her of what happened when one did, in fact, venture outside the figurative and literal walls, oft spoke the loudest. Today, that young girl was screaming almost as loudly as the former, begging to remain indoors. Away from danger. Away from men who could hurt her.

  It suddenly dawned on Aggie that there were indeed men inside these walls who could—and had—hurt her over the years. Either by deeds or words. No matter where she turned, there was always a man nearby to remind her that she wasn’t safe anywhere.

  Present company excluded.

  Wrapping her arms around her waist, she set to pacing around the room, mulling Frederick’s request over in her mind. She was safe with him. Safer with him than with anyone. Why, the king’s guards would probably not be as reliable or determined to keep her safe as the man she married.

  There is a big world out there Aggie. One ye’ve no’ seen in a verra long time, she told herself. And ye ken well that Frederick will no’ let any harm come to ye. Still…Nay! No’ still. As long as ye are with Frederick, no harm will come to ye. All the man asks is that ye trust him, and at least try to take a wee walk without goin’ to the dark place. Just try.

  With her mind made up, she turned to face him. “Just a wee walk?” she asked for clarification.

  “Aye, just a wee walk. We’ll come inside the moment ye ask, I swear it,” he reassured her.

  “And I c-can take me sgian dubhs?” she asked with a tilt of her head.

  Frederick smiled at her. “Aye, lass, ye can. Ye can even wear me broadsword around yer wee waist if ye like.”

  Her eyes flashed to his broadsword. The thing was nearly as tall as she was! She’d look quite ridiculous trying to wear the thing around her waist. “Ye are d-daft at t-times, ye ken that, don’t ye?”

  A wry smile formed along with a mischievous twinkle in his eye. “I have been told that before, my queen,” he said as he bowed regally.

  “Och! D-do no’ start that again!” she warned him, though it had brought a smile to her face.

  “Then ye’ll walk with me?” he asked hopefully.

&nb
sp; Aggie let loose a long breath and gave him a nod. “Aye, I shall,” she told him.

  He smiled as though she had just crowned him king. A daft man, she thought. But a verra handsome one.

  Twenty-Three

  MERMADAK SAT IN his office, mulling over the many different ways he might be able to kill Frederick Mackintosh, as well as Aggie. And that bastard born Ailrig she was so fond of. And Rose! And the one called Findal.

  The longer he sat brooding, the longer the list of people whose lives he wished to take grew. He was even beginning to dislike Donnel and the way the ugly man sat with his feet propped up on Mermadak’s desk, chewing on his fingernails and spitting the bits on the floor.

  “Get yer bloody feet off me desk!” Mermadak said as he shoved the man’s booted feet away.

  Donnel stared blankly at him and sat up in his chair.

  It had been days since the events in the gathering room and Mermadak was still furious. The only delight he took these past days was from the images he conjured up in his mind. Images of blood running from Frederick Mackintosh’s heart, taking his life with it. Or Aggie hanging from a tree, her body burned beyond recognition.

  “Have ye thought what ye want us to do about the Mackintosh?” Donnel asked.

  Had he thought of it? The fool. That was all he’d done for few days. Mermadak shot the man an angry glare, warning him to shut his mouth.

  He wanted them all to suffer. Slowly. Wretchedly. Painfully.

  The way to make Frederick suffer was through Aggie. Mermadak could see that now. For reasons he could not quite fathom, the Mackintosh fool was falling in love with Aggie. Any fool could see it. Mermadak supposed the why of it was of no import. What was important was figuring a way to make them all suffer.

  An idea came to him, one that brought a smile to his face. To make Aggie suffer was to take those she loved away from her. He could order Rose to be married off, to some irritable bastard from a faraway clan. Aye, that would show them all just how powerful he was. And Aggie would be miserable in the process.