My Secret Life

by Lori Wilde

  If anyone but Tanisha had told her this, Katie would have been inclined to make light of her feelings for Liam. But this was Tanisha, who’d started at Sharper Designs on the same day she had. Who’d let her sleep on her couch when Katie’s condo was being fumigated. Who brought over Chinese food when she was down in the dumps and doled out sharp-witted advice.

  She owed Tanisha the truth. Had to open herself up to someone. Tanisha had proven she was her friend.

  “It’s too late. I mean, even if he did forgive me for deceiving him, I don’t know if I can forgive him for walking out on me. The least he could have done was stay and fight.”

  “Don’t judge him too quickly. Some people withdraw when they’re upset. That’s what happened with Dwayne and me.”

  “The one time I finally break down and have sex in a bed, I go and fall in love,” her voice cracked.

  “What?” Tanisha’s eyes rounded. “Did you say the L word?”

  Miserably, Katie nodded.

  “Oh, sweetie,” Tanisha said with such a look of pity on her face that Katie wanted to crawl into a hole and pull dirt over her.

  All the years she’d spent playing the field and having fun, keeping her heart safely out of the fray, had come to a crashing end. She was no longer immune to the slings and arrows of love.

  And it hurt so bad.

  “I’m okay. I’ll be all right. I don’t want to rain on your parade. How about we go out tonight and celebrate your pending marriage.”

  “Ooh, I’m sorry.” Tanisha made a face. “We’re going over to my folks to tell them in person. Tomorrow night, maybe?”

  “Sure.” Katie bobbed her head. Thankfully, her cell phone rang at that moment. She pulled it from her pocket as Tanisha went off to flash her engagement ring to the rest of their coworkers. “Hello?”

  “Katie?”

  “Yes?”

  “This is Lindsay Beckham,” came the cool polished voice of the Martinis and Bikinis president.

  Great. It was the person responsible for her downfall. “What is it?” she asked, only barely managing to control her snippy tone.

  “I’m afraid there’s been something of a mix-up.”

  “A mix-up?”

  Lindsay paused. “It’s totally my fault. I take full responsibility.”

  “For what?”

  “The last dare I sent you?”

  “Yeah?”

  “It was meant for one of the other women.”

  Katie let out a bark of laughter. “That’s hilarious.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Because of that last dare, my life is ruined.”

  “Ruined?” Lindsay repeated. “Are you sure you’re not overstating the issue?”

  “You told me to confess!”

  “No, I told Sherry to confess.”

  “But you sent Sherry’s dare to me, so it had the same consequences as if you’d sent it to me.” Katie’s hand was shaking. From anger, from sorrow, from the whole sheer craziness of it. “You know what? I wish I’d never set foot in your bar. I wish I’d never met you and your Martini group.”

  “This is worse than I thought,” Lindsay said. “I’m sorry, I never meant for this to happen. If you’d let me make amends—”

  “Nice of you to offer, but unless you know how to superglue a broken heart, there’s not much you can do. I’ve got to get back to work now.”

  “I hope you won’t give up on Martinis and Bikinis just because of this little snafu—”

  “Bye,” Katie said, and hung up, never feeling more wretched.

  IN A VAIN ATTEMPT to boost her spirits, Katie made a beeline for the pet shop after her awful day at work. She couldn’t wait for the salve of seeing Duke’s sweet face and happily wagging tail.

  “Hey, pup,” Katie cooed as she walked up to the window. Only to find it empty.

  Duke wasn’t there.

  You waited too long. Someone else bought him.

  The disappointment that came over her was perplexing. Why did she care so much about that dog?

  Maybe they hadn’t sold Duke. Maybe the store owner had taken him out for a walk. Katie pushed inside the pet store, hoping that was, indeed, the case.

  “Hello,” greeted the friendly faced woman behind the counter.

  “Hi.”

  “You’re the one who’s always coming in here to play with the cocker spaniel, aren’t you?”

  Katie nodded. “I noticed he wasn’t in the window.”

  The woman’s eyes lit up. “Someone bought him, only an hour or so ago.”

  You’re too late. That’s what happens when you’re afraid to commit.

  A lump welled in Katie’s throat and she had to blink hard to keep from crying. God, this was so stupid. Getting misty-eyed over a puppy who wasn’t even hers. “Did he go to a good home?”

  “A very good home.” The pet-shop woman nodded. “The man said he was buying him as a surprise for his girlfriend. Apparently she’s always wanted a dog, but circumstances have prevented her from owning one until now.”

  “It’s good he’s found a great home.” Katie forced a smile. “I’m happy. So happy.”

  Quickly, she turned and hurried from the pet shop. She thought of the dog collar Liam had given her. She’d never get to use it on Duke.

  She didn’t feel like heading home, but she didn’t want to go to a bar by herself. Not knowing what else to do, she headed for the park.

  She walked down the path sniffling into a tissue, telling herself she was sad because Duke was no longer in the window. Denying that her sorrow had anything to do with Liam.

  The air was cool but not unpleasantly so. Autumn leaves gusted across the sidewalk. On the yellowing grass, a group of teenage boys played football, laughing and tussling. She could hear the city traffic passing by and in the distance, the sound of a dog barking.

  She skirted the pond, watching the ducks swim gracefully across the water and remembered the day Duke had pulled her in. She remembered Liam’s apartment, and her heart swelled against the bittersweet memory. In three short weeks, she’d lost them both, Duke and Liam.

  A trio of women on in-line skates scooted past her. The barking dog was getting closer. She passed a park bench where an elderly couple sat holding hands and watching the birds bedding down in the trees before nightfall.

  She rounded a corner and up ahead she saw a man in a beige trench coat walking a dog.

  It was a cocker spaniel who looked just like Duke.

  The dog’s barking grew more frantic as he pulled on his owner’s leash.

  Katie’s eyes went from the dog to the man.

  Liam!

  She didn’t know what to do, so she just stood there, waiting for him to get closer. But Duke wasn’t into the games people play when they’re falling in love. He jerked the leash from Liam’s hand and came barreling straight toward her, his long curly ears flapping as he ran.

  She dropped to her knees and scooped the cocker spaniel into her arms. He greeted her with a wriggling tail and exuberant tongue. Liam couldn’t have given her a better gift if he’d presented her with the title to his Lamborghini. “The pet-shop lady told me some man had bought him for his girlfriend.”

  “He did,” Liam said.

  Katie’s eyes met his. “You bought Duke for me?”

  “I did.”

  “But my condo won’t let me keep pets.”

  “You could always move.”

  “Where to?”

  “I was hoping,” his voice cracked, “you’d consider moving in with me. But if it’s too soon for that, there’s a vacant apartment in my building.”

  LIAM WATCHED HER set the puppy on the ground and stand up to face him. Her soft blond hair floated loosely about her shoulders in a sexy tumble. Her lips were painted a luscious shade of raspberry. She was dressed in black tailored slacks, a starched white blouse and tweed blazer. She looked sophisticated, relaxed and utterly beautiful.

  “I can’t answer that question the way you want me t
o answer.”

  He pulled in a breath. He was hoping giving her the dog would be enough to get back into her good graces. He should have known it wouldn’t be that easy. “I screwed up, Katie. I know it. I can’t tell you how sorry I am.”

  It hurt him to see her eyes were red-rimmed and she held a tissue clutched tight in her hand. She’d been crying, and he was terrified he was the cause of it. He reached to touch her forearm, but she shied away.

  “You really pulled the rug out from under me, Liam. I was finally ready to take a chance on love and when I did, when I dared to lower my guard and make myself vulnerable, you walked out on me.”

  “I had a lot of time to think on the flight home and I didn’t like what I realized about myself. I was projecting my guilt about not admitting who I really was onto you. I went to see Finn Delancy and I confronted him.”

  “What happened?”

  “He denied he was my father.”

  “So nothing was resolved?”

  “No,” he said. “I finally figured out there was nothing to resolve. I don’t need Finn Delancy to validate me. I don’t need the fortune I’ve amassed to prove I’m a worthy human being.”

  “So where does this leave us?”

  “Right here.” Liam couldn’t stand not touching her again. He reached out, took her hands and slowly pulled her toward him.

  “All the old resentment toward Delancy is gone?”

  “Every bit of it. How about you?”

  She nodded. “I feel great. No, better than great. I feel free.”

  “Me, too.”

  “What about your work? What’s going to replace the drive in your life now that Delancy no longer matters to you?” she asked.

  “I was hoping you could help me find a way to fill that void.”

  A small smile appeared on her lips. “I think maybe we could work something out.”

  “I want to make this work, Katie. I want it so badly. More than I’ve ever wanted anything, even getting back at my father.”

  “You’ve forgiven me for using you to complete my Martini dares?”

  “I was never mad at you.”

  “No? Because it sure felt like it.”

  He shook his head. “I was afraid. Afraid of what I was feeling. Afraid that I could never be man enough for a woman like you.”

  She cupped his cheek with her palm and gazed at him with such tenderness it made his heart hurt.

  “What changed your mind?”

  “You did. Your strength and courage inspired me. You were brave enough to do those dares, to put yourself on the line. I had to try. I couldn’t go through the rest of my life not knowing what might have been.”

  KATIE STARED into his hazel eyes at the vulnerable man behind the suave facade. What she saw reflected there moved her deeply and swept away any remaining doubts she harbored. Liam had no idea the value of his own worth, but she was determined to teach him.

  “I’m ready to start fresh,” he said. “If you’ll forgive me. I’ve made a lot a mistakes and, I swear, I’ll do my best to make up for them.”

  “It’s already over. Forgiven and forgotten,” she said.

  “Katie.” He kissed her there on the sidewalk while Duke ran in circles around their feet, tangling them up in his leash.

  “No more secrets between us,” Liam said, breaking the kiss to stare into her eyes. “Not even silly ones.”

  “No more secrets,” she promised.

  “I respect you, I admire you, I envy the courageous way you love so fully, so easily. You’re my hero, Katie Winfield.”

  “Really?” Her heart filled with emotion.

  He hitched in his breath. “And I love you, Katie, and I don’t throw those words around lightly. In fact, other than my mother, you’re the only one I’ve ever said them to.”

  She could tell how much it cost him to admit his feelings. He was used to tamping them down, hiding from tender emotions. But here he was laying himself bare, putting his heart on the line for her.

  “Thank you, Liam,” she said, “for that most treasured gift.”

  He’d said the words she’d most needed to hear. He made her feel cherished and prized and that her opinions were valued.

  “You’ve saved me from myself.” He touched his forehead against hers and stared deeply into her eyes.

  “Oh, Liam.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I love you, too.”

  THEY WENT BACK to Liam’s place. They fed and watered Duke and made him a pallet on the floor.

  Without another word, Liam took off his clothes and undressed her slowly, carefully, and then led her to his bed. When his fingers touched her bare skin, her nerve endings dissolved into a pool of liquid fire.

  For Liam, this was all about her pleasure. Nothing mattered more to him than this glorious woman, who’d not only turned his world upside down but twisted his heart inside out and changed everything he knew.

  All these years, he’d believed he would never really find where he belonged. He’d been so very wrong. He belonged right here with Katie.

  The provocative little moan that escaped her as his fingers kneaded her bare backside caught him low in the gut and inflamed his passion, the way she always did.

  Why on earth had he ever placed thoughts of revenge above acts of love? In less than a month of knowing her, she’d given him so much. He vowed to spend the rest of his life giving back more than he got. And if that included dressing up like a pirate, or making love in the balcony of a theatre, then by gosh, he’d willingly do it for her.

  He leaned down to kiss the nape of her neck, but before he got there, she rolled over onto her back and looked up into his eyes with such love it took his breath away.

  “Get over here,” she said, wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him toward her.

  “Now we’re talking.” His body hardened with anticipation as he thought of all the fun that lay ahead of them. She tugged his head down to hers and kissed him with a deep, wet passionate kiss that told him he was the luckiest man in the world.

  He settled his body over hers, bracing his weight on his forearms, and looked deeply into her eyes.

  “I love you, Katie Winfield, now, tomorrow, always.”

  “Oh, Liam,” she said. “That’s all I ever wanted to hear.”

  He enveloped her in his arms, listened to the pounding of her heart. He felt truly immortal.

  Then they nibbled and licked and touched and suckled. They took their time, fully getting to know each other. No surprises, no disguises.

  Just true and honest loving.

  The hours streamed by in a blur of sensuous heat, the sating of sexual longings, until at the very stroke of midnight, their two souls merged as one. They knew there would never be any more secrets between them.

  Love had changed the physics of their lives and redrawn the boundary of what they’d believed about the world and the magic that was truly possible.

  And as they reached love’s glorious pinnacle, separated only by the thinnest rind of skin, their fate was sealed, their destinies forever intertwined.

  15

  WHEN HER CELL PHONE rang the next morning, Katie rolled over with a smile on her face. She glanced to see Liam asleep beside her and Duke dozing at the foot of the bed. Her grin widened. It wasn’t a dream. Quietly, she slipped out of the bed and snatched her purse up off the floor, digging out her cell phone on the fly as she hustled to the living room.

  “Hello.”

  “Katie, where are you? I went by your condo to see if you wanted to do breakfast but you weren’t there.”

  “Brooke, how are you?” She felt so wonderful she wanted to share her joy with her sister but wasn’t sure how she would feel about the news that Katie and Liam were an item.

  “I think I’m finally feeling strong enough to go through mother’s things. Joey’s up for it, too. How about you?”

  Sorting through their mother’s personal effects was going to be an emotional experience and until now, she’d rigorou
sly avoided it. Honestly, all three of them had. But it needed to be done. And being with Liam had given Katie the courage she needed to face her shortcomings and problems in the moment, and deal with them.

  “When?”

  “You’ll come?”

  “Yes.”

  “This afternoon.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  “You sound different,” Brooke observed.

  “How so?”

  “You sound like you’ve accepted Mom’s death.”

  Katie realized it was true. At some point, she’d let go of her anger. She’d learned to handle her fears honestly and to stop hiding from herself. And in the process, she’d learned to accept the world as it was.

  Even though she was sad her mother was gone, she had her memories. So many great memories.

  “Actually,” Katie said, “I’m looking forward to doing this. It’s time to give up the grieving and celebrate Mom’s life.”

  Brooke made a tiny noise of surprise. “You sound so mature and responsible.”

  That acknowledgement from her sister tightened Katie’s throat with emotion. “A lot’s happened to me lately. I’ll tell you about it when I get there.”

  Several hours later, after she and Liam had bonded over breakfast in bed, Katie arrived at her family’s home. Her sisters were already there, sitting cross-legged on the floor of their mother’s bedroom looking at photo albums, a box of tissues sitting between them.

  “Katie,” Brooke said, getting to her feet to hug her.

  How incredibly beautiful her sister was with her dreamy light brown eyes, long, silky caramel-colored hair and arched widow’s peak. They didn’t know where Brooke had inherited it. No one else in the family had one.

  Her oldest sister possessed a seriousness that Katie lacked. But Brooke also had a way about her that instantly put others at ease. She was soothing as warm milk on a cold winter night. She wore simple, tailored clothes in muted, don’t-notice-me colors, which was odd for an artistic woman who dressed windows for the most exclusive department store in Boston.

  Brooke pulled back and gave Katie the once over. “You’re glowing. You look…happy.”

  “You look like a woman in love,” Joey commented.

  She was aware of the heat of her sister’s gaze on her face. Joey was a lawyer and quite perceptive. Taller than Katie, she was also thinner, with the lithe gait of a dancer. Her hair was styled in a sleek cut that softened her angular face. She had a Mensa IQ and a wickedly sharp sense of humor that often belied her good-girl image.