Justice Unhatched (The Exceptional S. Beaufont Book 5)
Page 32
Something occurred to her, and she jerked up her chin suddenly. “You’re sure the cupcakes will work, right?”
Lee nodded. “Oh, yeah. I’m not as good a baker as my drunk wife, but I can manage.” She indicated the side workstation where Cat was lying on it like it was a bed. Her head was resting on a bag of flour. “I gave her another dose of painkiller since her knee was bothering her still after her fall.”
“By painkillers,” Sophia began, a question in her tone, “do you simply mean hard liquor?”
“Lick her?” Lee asked with a laugh. “I only lick her softly.”
Sophia shook her head. “Please stop.”
“Okay, well, you get those cupcakes to the mortal you risked so much to help,” Lee encouraged. “I’ve got to go see a guy about a thing.”
“You’re not still going with the cut out the floor strategy, are you?” Sophia asked.
Lee shook her head. “Nope. I’m going with the anvil idea. Precariously hanging it over a partially open door.”
Sophia sighed. “Yeah, I still think you could go with something a bit more direct.”
“Like removing the reinforcement from his third-story balcony? Then I leave a loop of rope out on this balcony floor and I call him and wait until he walks out and steps into the loop, then I yank the rope and draw him off the side of the balcony and kill him with the fall?” Lee asked, her face quite serious.
Sophia scrunched up her brow. “You seriously are the worst assassin in the world. Why don’t you just try using a sniper gun?”
Lee glanced back at it. “Oh, I don’t like guns. I don’t use that for the rifle. I just have it for the scope, but I do keep the safety off the gun because I like to live dangerously.”
“Seems about right,” Sophia said and wondered how she managed to make the strangest friends in the world.
Lee pointed to the cupcake box and squinted. “So you owe me something for that.”
Sophia blushed, feeling bad for not offering something initially. “Yes, of course. How much?” She felt around in her pockets.
The baker slash assassin shook her head. “No, you’re money is no good here, dragonrider. Instead, I want you to do something for me…”
Dipping her chin, Sophia regarded her with hooded eyes. “Of course you do. That’s always the way it is. Why don’t the people I work with ever just want money in compensation?”
“Because that’s boring,” Lee explained. “We’d much rather put your talents to use. I’ve got money, but what I haven’t got is a katana sword that has ten different magical properties and is revered for its healing abilities by the person who holds it.”
“Wait, what?” Sophia pretended to ask. “You don’t have that sword? I’m surprised. I thought everyone did.”
Lee shook her head. “No, I dropped my katana sword in some suburban neighborhood on Halloween, as one does.”
Sophia nodded. “As one does.”
“That one I got at Walmart though and it didn’t have any magical properties,” Lee stated and then added, “Well, besides that it was dirt cheap.”
“You can buy a katana sword at Walmart?” Sophia asked, realizing that really shouldn’t be the take away from this all.
Lee shrugged. “I went in to buy milk and eggs and came out with a katana sword and a lawn mower.”
Sophia laughed. “Yeah, neither of those are usually spontaneous purchases.”
“You’re telling me,” Lee replied. “I don’t even have a lawn so you can guess that Cat is pretty pissed about it taking up space in our living room.”
“Why did you buy a lawn mower?” Sophia had to ask. “And why keep it in your living room?”
“Well, it was in the bedroom because I thought it made for a nice art piece, but Cat just kept draping clothes on it like it was a treadmill.” Lee shook her head, disapproval on her face. “And both the katana sword and the lawn mower were on sale, so I couldn’t really pass up the deal.”
“But you don’t have a lawn,” Sophia argued.
Lee scowled. “I don’t have a boat and you think that stopped me from personalized sails? And I don’t have a car, but do you think that stopped me from buying custom rims?”
“I’m guessing no,” Sophia said dryly.
The baker shrugged. “When I see a good deal, I get it. Of course…” She leaned forward, looking over her shoulder toward the back where Cat was probably sleeping. “My wife is really peeved about all these purchases.”
“Because it’s a waste of money?” Sophia asked.
Lee shook her head. “No, because they all end up in the bedroom, taking up space.”
Sophia couldn’t help but laugh. “It sounds like you’ll need to get a bigger place with all that money you like to throw away.”
She scoffed, like this was a bad idea on Sophia’s part. “That would be a total waste of money. Real estate is a horrible investment. Everyone knows that.”
“And what’s a smart investment, according to you?”
“Toilet paper,” Lee whispered. “I have a feeling that it will one day be quite the expensive commodity.”
“Yeah, maybe…” Sophia gave her a doubtful look.
“Hey, when you’re down to your last roll, you stop by here and I’ll sell you some at an outrageous price,” Lee offered.
“Thanks,” Sophia replied. “But let’s settle up for these cupcakes you made. You want me to go get this katana sword for you?”
“Yes,” Lee stated. “But first you’ll need to track down an expert in weapons.”
A smile broke across Sophia’s face as she thought about Wilder. “I don’t think that will be too hard.”
“You’ll also need something that can project fire,” Lee said, a disparaging expression on her face.
Sophia’s grin widened. “Again, I think I can figure this out.”
“Oh, good,” Lee stated. “Then the last part will be easy. You just need a magic compass, Zack Efron and a pack of magic chewing gum.”
“Is that all?” Sophia asked with a laugh.
“Well…” Lee toggled her head back and forth, thinking. “You could also use the ashes of a thousand warrior horses, preferably all black ones, but we could settle for only eighty percent of them being monochromatic.”
“Ummm…I don’t think I can get that.”
Lee stuck her hands on her hips and scowled. “Not with that mind set you won’t. Really, it’s thinking like that which keeps you stuck in the dark ages.”
“I’m the youngest dragonrider in history and the only one who has a knowledge or appreciation of modern culture,” Sophia argued dryly.
Lee waved her off. “Forget the ashes of warrior horses. You can manage without it, so long as you have Zack Efron.”
“Why him?” Sophia asked, thinking of the movie star who played one of her favorite roles in the Greatest Showman.
“He can tap dance,” Lee answered at once.
“Well, I think there’s a lot of people who can tap dance,” Sophia argued. “Can you settle for someone who isn’t famous and possibly difficult to locate and convince them to do whatever it’s you have planned to get this katana sword?”
Lee rolled her eyes. “You’re one of those people who puts nonfat milk in her coffee when ice cream is an option, aren’t you? If I teach you anything, it will be not to settle. I want the best tap dancer there’s and that’s Zack Efron. Also, he has a winning smile and a great voice. I think that will be important.”
“Okay,” Sophia said, drawing out the word. “I need a weapons expert, a dragon, Zack Efron, a magical compass and magical chewing gum. Anything else?”
“No, but you might have to secure some strange treasure in compensation for the compass and the chewing gum.”
“And how do I get those?” Sophia asked.
Lee shook her head. “I can’t do everything for you. The compass has to be elven made and the chewing gum has to put the person who chews it into a fantastic mood no matter what the situation.”
Sophia glanced around at the bakery. “You make magical treats here. Can’t you help with that one?”
“No,” Lee said at once. “We make baked goods. We’re not a candy store. For that, you’ll have to find the one somewhere on Roya Lane here. It’s run by elves, so I apologize in advance for the hippie nonsense they will inundate you with.”
Trying to remember where such a place was, Sophia’s brow scrunched. Roya Lane was full of strange shops and government offices and it was impossible to know where everything was since it always changed around. However, she was certain she’d never seen a magic candy store on the street. “Do you know the name of this place?”
Lee nodded. “It’s called Midnight Lunar Eclipse.”
“Oh, I definitely haven’t been there before,” Sophia remarked.
“No, it hasn’t been opened in a while,” Lee explained. “It’s only open during a tiny window.”
Sophia huffed. “Let me guess. It’s only open at midnight during a lunar eclipse?”
Lee’s face broke into a smile. “And here I thought I’d have to spell it out for you.”
“So I have to wait until then to get this magical chewing gum?” Sophia asked. “Is that all right?” She didn’t want her debt to go unpaid.
Lee nodded. “It’s what it is. I’ve waited this long for my katana sword. And you’ve got to get that cupcake to the mortal who is going to eat it.”
Sophia glanced at the small white boxes, thinking of Rudolf and the money and all the other things she needed to accomplish. She wasn’t excited about adding another mission to the list, but she was going to make good on things with Lee for baking the cupcake.
“Okay, well when is the next lunar eclipse?” Sophia asked.
“In a year,” Lee replied. “So if you can secure some time traveling device that takes you to that spot, that would be ideal.”
Sophia had already defied Father Time once. She wasn’t sure that she could do it again. But also, he probably already knew about it and was going to assist her or have Liv stop her.
“Okay, time travel to the future,” Sophia began. “Go to Midnight Lunar Eclipse and buy magical chewing gum. Recruit Zack Efron. Find a magical compass and then what? Where is this katana sword?”
Lee shrugged. “Beats me. But I’ve got a lead on it. So you go and feed a mortal that cupcake and get back to your day job. The next time that I see you, I’ll have the location. Then you can go about getting the rest of the things you need for this mission.”
Holding up the boxes, Sophia offered a smile. “Well, thanks for doing this. And I’m happy to make good on the deal once you have the location for the sword.”
A wicked chuckle fell from the baker’s mouth. “Don’t be so willing to repay. If my suspicions are correct, you might be paying with your life or at least a limb or two. This won’t be an easy mission, recovering the katana sword.”
Sophia nodded, darkly. “It never is.”
Chapter One Hundred Eight
Not happy to be back in Las Vegas, but thoroughly grateful to have fulfilled her end of the bargain for King Rudolf, Sophia strolled into the Cosmopolitan hotel and casino carrying the two small white boxes with the magical cupcakes.
She didn’t really know what she would do with the extra one. According to Lee, it had to be consumed in the next twenty-four hours to work. Sophia could not really think of any mortals to give it to. She had considered giving both to Serena for good measure, but the assassin baker had warned that could be dangerous. Less was more in this case.
Sophia reasoned she would figure it out after she had completed this part of her mission.
Rushing through the lobby, she paused by a pillar and noticed a horde of crazed mortals glaring all around. Sensing there might be a security issue involving the king of the fae, Sophia listened in and tried to discern what was happening.
“He went that way,” one of them said in a terse whisper.
“No, he went that way to Jesse Rae’s,” another argued.
“I’m telling you, Michael is here, hiding somewhere in the lobby. We have to find him and tell him about all the ideas for books we have that we want written.”
One of the others shook their head. “No, there’s no way he could do that. He would have to live for like another hundred or two hundred years.”
“But we need those books,” one of them demanded. “I need more Bethany Anne. We all have characters we want more of.”
“Well, then we’ll just have to divide up,” someone suggested. “If we spread out, then we will be able to find him.”
A short woman with an adamant glare in her eyes stepped forward. “I don’t want to get all Misery about this, but if he isn’t willing to do what we want, I say we take action into our hands.”
The others looked to one another, searching for someone to disagree with this dangerous mindset. When no one voiced a concern, they all nodded.
“Okay, let’s divide up and find the Yoda.”
Sophia peeled out from the pillar and watched the crazy mortals scatter. She didn’t know who this Michael was, but he sounded like he was in trouble—in maybe a good way. He had crazed fans who were very demanding. That wasn’t such a bad thing.
Shrugging it off, she made her way to the private elevators that led up to King Rudolf’s chambers. She boarded the elevator, careful to keep the cupcakes level so they didn’t get messed up in the small white boxes.
The doors to the elevator were just about to shut when a guy rushed through just before the doors slammed shut.
“Whew,” he said, throwing his back up against the wall of the elevator and closing his eyes. He was taking deep breaths like he hadn’t breathed properly in a while. He wore glasses, and his black hair had a cowlick in the front. He appeared young with his boyish facial features, but he had a maturity about him.
Sophia realized she was staring when he opened his eyes and looked at her like she was a crazy stalker.
“Sorry,” she said, tearing her gaze away. “You just seem stressed.”
He nodded. “I am. I have some pretty demanding followers stalking me. I think I just got away from them.”
Sophia thought it was none of her business.
“Oh, we’re not going anywhere,” the guy noticed, looking at the panel of buttons on the elevator.
“Sorry,” Sophia admitted. “I had my hands full and forgot to hit a button.”
“No, problem,” the guy said. “What floor do you need?”
“The very top,” she stated.
He pressed the button and the one under it. “There we go.” He smiled good-naturedly at her. “How are you today?”
She wasn’t used to being asked that question, and for a moment she didn’t know how to answer it. Finally she said, “I guess everything is okay. I’ve got to deliver these cupcakes, then deliver a payment to a hard-working scientist. And then I have to get a dress from a seamstress and keep an appointment I don’t remember making.”
He shook his head. “Although I appreciate all the information, I was asking, how are you? Not how is everything going that’s demanding your time and attention.”
Sophia was shocked by the phrasing. He was right. That was a different question. He had asked how she was, not what she was doing.
“Oh,” she said, assessing how she felt. “I guess I’m overwhelmed and a little tired. But all in all, I’m really good. I feel happy I get to help the ones I love. That’s a good thing.”
He grinned, nodding. “That’s a great thing.”
“How are you?” she asked, returning the question, watching the slow progress of the elevator.
“Well, a bunch of fans are chasing me because they want me to write all these different stories, and I want to do it, but I just don’t know how I’ll find the time.”
“Michael!” she exclaimed.
His face registered his shock. “How did you know who I am? Are you a fan?”
She shook her head. “I mean, maybe I should be,
but I hardly have time to read. There’s one book I need to read before any other, in its entirety.” Sophia thought about The Complete History of Dragonriders sitting on her desk in her room in the Castle at the Gullington. “I heard your readers strategizing about how to track you down. Don’t worry, they went in the opposite direction.”
He let out a breath. “Well, I’ll catch up with them. I don’t like disappointing them. I just don’t know what to tell them when they unload all of their great ideas. How do I say there isn’t enough time left in the day for that many stories?”
Sophia grinned, grateful to the universe for once again providing a solution. She took one of the cupcakes and offered it to Michael. “I know we don’t know each other, but I’m a rider for the Dragon Elite.”
“The Dragon Elite?” he asked in astonishment, having heard of the organization.
She nodded to the sword on her hip. It was her universal identification. “Yes, and I hope you trust me when I tell you this cupcake here will extend your life and make it so you live longer than any normal mortal. Maybe if you do, then you’ll be able to craft all the stories they demand.”
The guy peered at the cupcake tentatively and then smiled. “Seriously?”
She nodded. “I know it seems like a strange thing for someone to offer you, but I have an extra one and you…well, you seem like someone who needs to stick around for a long time.”
Michael grinned at her as the doors to the elevator bounced open. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything,” Sophia explained as he backed out of the elevator. “Just enjoy your life and make it worth it.”
He nodded and held up the small white box. “Thank you.”
Chapter One Hundred Nine
Still amazed she had randomly run into the guy the crazed mortals were looking for, Sophia walked into King Rudolf’s chamber in a daze. She almost strode by the baby sitting in a bouncy seat outside of the main room.