Seven Tears at High Tide

by C. B. Lee

  The shorts are kicked off carelessly, but Kevin’s sweatshirt is folded delicately and placed on a dry spot on the sand.

  “Morgan, what are you—?”

  “Shhh, I’m showing you.” Morgan turns around and presses a finger to Kevin’s lips.

  Kevin is definitely blushing now and he avoids looking down. “Yeah, you are.” As soon as the words are out of his mouth he’s aware of how cheesy he sounds. He has to laugh at himself, but he’s allowed to flirt with his boyfriend, right?

  Morgan gives him a mischievous look and steps toward the ocean, and Kevin is once again aware that Morgan is naked and standing unabashed in the moonlight. “Look,” he says, and Kevin is unable to look anywhere else.

  Morgan picks up the pelt and swings it over his shoulders, then steps forward. The incoming wave curls in on itself, creeps up the sand, then ebbs. The night is silent except for the wind, the rhythm of the waves and Morgan splashing into the ocean. The pelt seems to shrink; the space around it shimmers like air above a fire.

  Another wave crashes in, and Morgan ducks right into it. Kevin cries out when he doesn’t immediately reappear.

  Cursing, Kevin dashes forward, ready to pull him out, but then he sees a silhouette rising out of the wave—

  It’s a seal.

  Kevin freezes. The water rushes past his ankles and soaks through his socks and shoes, but he can’t move; he’s trying to figure out what just happened. Morgan is still in the water somewhere, but the seal, the seal came out of nowhere. If it had swum up, surely he would have noticed—

  The seal barks as the waves carry him to Kevin. He falls back­ward, and the seal scrambles on top of him, nosing at his face in a very un-seal like manner.

  Kevin looks into familiar brown eyes, and then he knows, even if it makes no sense.

  “Morgan?”

  The seal makes a happy noise and bumps a wet nose against his cheek.

  “I don’t really understand what’s happening.” Kevin pats the seal carefully on its head. There’s a slight shimmering, and in the blink of an eye on top of Kevin is a naked Morgan with the pelt draped across his back like a cape. He’s wet and laughing, shaking with barely contained excitement.

  Morgan, all confidence and energy, kisses him. His lips are wet with saltwater, plump and full, and Kevin moans into the kiss as Morgan’s tongue teases its way into his mouth. He’s pressed against the shore; the wet sand sinks under their weight. The kiss is slow, euphoric, a hot contrast to the cold water ebbing and flowing around them. Morgan’s body is flush against his, just the two of them and the roar of the ocean.

  They break apart, gasping and grinning at each other, and Kevin can’t tell if it’s been five minutes or five days, he’s so pleasantly disoriented.

  He’s not embarrassed that Morgan is naked; he’s full of awe and wonder. Kevin tries to speak but all he manages is, “You’re really… wow.”

  They sit on the beach together. The pelt is almost iridescent in the moonlight, lying across Morgan’s lap. Kevin studies Morgan holding his hand, watching the way the flush on his cheeks travels down his neck and blossoms across his chest. He thinks about all the strange things Morgan has said this summer, about his reactions that made Kevin think he was just sheltered, but this—this makes more sense.

  “I am a selkie,” Morgan says, watching Kevin for a response. His fingers twitch nervously under Kevin’s.

  Kevin interlaces their fingers to show his support, and he nods, still too stunned to speak. It almost could be a dream, the velvety night all around them, softly lit by the moon and stars, Morgan sitting next to him, looking at him ador­ingly. Except Kevin knows the warmth of Morgan’s hand is real, what he saw only a moment ago, the way his heart beats in time with the waves crashing ashore—this is all real, and his boyfriend is magic.

  Morgan tells Kevin about his family following the current, traveling all over the world, staying in different places depending on the season; about selkies and other shape-shifters from the depths of the ocean. It’s as though a whole door of possibilities has opened in Kevin’s mind, casting light on every strange experience he’s had, on every person who’s ever mentioned “locals” no one in town has heard of.

  As a seven-year-old kid, Kevin was playing in the waves, and drifted far, far from Piedras Blancas, and had no idea where he was, and another kid found him in the water, crying because he couldn’t recognize the beach. The other boy just took Kevin’s hand and swam with him back to Piedras Blancas, and disappeared into the waves before Kevin could invite him ashore to play. Kevin remembers being distraught that he couldn’t find his new friend anywhere in town, asking everywhere for a dark-skinned boy with a gap between his teeth. Had he been a selkie? Or another shape-shifter?

  “Magic. What else is there? Vampires? Werewolves?”

  Morgan laughs at him. “I don’t know.” He smiles solemnly at him, tone changing to reverent, serious. “I can’t speak for land creatures, but the Sea is deep and ancient, full of secrets.”

  “This explains so much about you. Why I don’t see in you in other clothes, all the fish you brought—”

  “I’m a good hunter.” Morgan smiles, sitting a bit more upright.

  “But how did you know my name? Where I lived?”

  “The Sea hears many things, many stories, wishes, pleas,” Morgan says quietly. “You cast seven tears at high tide, asking for a companion. We have not had a proper Request in so long that my family was bound by our code to honor it. I was put to the task.”

  Kevin shivers. “Wait a minute. You’re only hanging out with me because of… some sad wish I made?”

  Morgan shakes his head. “Kevin, I am here because I want to be.”

  “You just said I was a ‘task,’ something your people felt obligated to do because I cried my heart out into the ocean.”

  “A Request,” Morgan corrects. “I would not have come if I had not liked what the Sea told me about you, and what I knew I loved immediately.”

  “I told you, you can’t keep saying that, I like you a lot, but—”

  “You’re cold. You should remove your wet skins.” Morgan tugs on the saturated T-shirt clinging to Kevin’s torso. It’s wet and cold and getting less comfortable by the minute, but Kevin isn’t sure how he would handle it if they were both naked.

  “It’s fine,” Kevin says, ignoring the growing chill. First he was thrilled to find out more about Morgan, about the supernatural, but now he’s starting to wonder how much of Morgan’s feelings are his own and how much is an omniscient, magical oceanic sentience showing pity on him. “I should get home. My parents know I hole myself up in my room sometimes, but it might be weird if I don’t get caught creeping to the kitchen to steal snacks.”

  “I can walk you back to your home.”

  “Sure.”

  With the pelt carefully wrapped around his neck like a scarf, Morgan picks up Kevin’s sweatshirt, dusts off the sand and then puts it back on. Kevin thinks the hood is caught on Morgan’s head for a second before he realizes Morgan is pausing to breathe in the scent of it. Morgan bends over to pull on the shorts, and Kevin realizes the smattering of freckles on his bare back correlates to the spotted pattern he’s seen on the seal. Kevin realizes he’s staring, blushes and looks at his feet and only looks up when Morgan takes his hand again.

  “You smell like anxiety,” Morgan says. “Are you unhappy that I am not truly human?”

  “No, it’s not that.” Kevin casts about for a way to explain, while he struggles to process that Morgan can smell his anxiety. Has he always been able to do this? “I just…”

  “You worry that I might have been compelled to feel this way about you.”

  “Yeah,” Kevin says in a small voice. He kicks at a stray pebble and his waterlogged shoe hangs heavily on his foot.

  They stop walking, and Morgan takes both his hands and l
ooks up at him, holding his gaze. The street is dark and empty, lit only by moonlight and a flickering streetlamp. “Kevin, when I first shifted, I wasn’t quite sure how to use my human form. I’d never done it before, never wanted to, even though most of my family has had practice. You helped me, and then gave me your skin off your back. I didn’t know yet that it didn’t mean the same thing for humans, but I was overwhelmed by your kindness and trust.”

  Morgan speaks with a clear voice, confident and steady. “I chose you, chose your Request. The Council may have said they assigned me, but you had my heart long before they heard your Request and thought who best in our herd could fulfill it. I was there, I saw you, heard you, wanted to know you.” Morgan lowers his gaze, looks up through his eyelashes. “The time I’ve spent with you has been wonderful, more than I ever could have hoped for.”

  “I really enjoy our time together, too. But that isn’t love—we’re just hanging out, you know. We’re dating, having a good time. Maybe in a longer relationship after we’ve been through a lot of stuff, we could say we loved each other, but—”

  Morgan shakes his head. “When my pelt was missing, I was terrified. I thought maybe—” He takes a deep breath; a sudden, wild fear shines in his eyes, and then the look is gone, replaced with a calm wonder. “You said you took it, but then immediately returned it to me when you found out it was mine. You didn’t know what it was or what you could have done with it—you gave it back knowing only that it belonged to me and that I was unhappy.”

  “Yeah, it would have been a jerk move to keep it.”

  Morgan squeezes Kevin’s hands. “Did you know my people have a history of coming ashore? We don’t do it very often anymore, take human forms like this. There are stories of pelts being stolen, humans keeping us for themselves—”

  “I would never do that to you.”

  Morgan’s entire face softens. “How do you doubt that I love you?”

  “It’s because we’re kids. We don’t know what love is.”

  Morgan plucks a stray piece of seaweed from Kevin’s hair. “It’s simple. I care about you, enjoy spending time with you and want you to be happy. It’s the easiest thing in the world to understand. I knew it when I saw you and you gave me the skin to wear, and I definitely knew it when you gave me back mine. It’s that warm, happy feeling in your gut, you know.”

  He doesn’t ask Kevin if he feels the same, doesn’t seem to need to; seems happy to just express it, to make sure Kevin knows. There’s a long-winded, complicated explanation he could give right now, but Morgan’s simple definition and acceptance strikes him as an honest truth.

  Maybe Kevin is the one who’s making it complicated. Maybe, when he said we don’t know what love is, he meant I don’t know what love is. Morgan seems to have a clear idea of what love means to him and how he feels about Kevin; he has no problem being open about it. Kevin remembers Morgan’s immediate declaration of feelings when they met, how he reacted with a kind of amused detachment, acknowledged Morgan’s feelings but didn’t feel ready or worthy of such unconditional adoration.

  But he knows Morgan now, knows his inquisitive nature and his kindness, his patience and easy sense of humor, knows Morgan supports his hopes and dreams. Kevin wants to be worthy of that affection, wants to continue knowing this amazing person who’s come into his life.

  “Okay,” Kevin says, stepping closer and pressing his face into Morgan’s neck, nuzzling at the skin there. He smells like the sea, the wild surf rolling in, the sharp tang of salt, bright and clean. He kisses him quickly on the jawline, then again, peppering him with light, playful kisses until Morgan laughs, grabs his chin and kisses him soundly on the mouth.

  “Come on, aren’t you still cold?” Morgan teases.

  “Forgot.” Kevin says, a little breathlessly. The wet clothes are still heavy on him, but somehow, he’s not cold at all.

  Eight.

  That night Morgan takes his time swimming back to his family’s beach. He knows he’s later than usual—the moon is high in the sky—but he’s too happy to think about it. He swims lazily, curling his body into the waves, drifting on his back to watch the moonlight and sighs happily, thinking about Kevin.

  Kevin didn’t run away or react with disgust when Morgan told him his secret. He only worried Morgan’s feelings for him were a byproduct of fulfilling his Request, but Morgan explained it the best he knew how.

  Telling him the truth was an impulsive decision, but Morgan was so overwhelmed that Kevin wanted to give him back his sealskin that he wanted Kevin to know how much that meant to him.

  And even after that, Kevin made no moves to take it from him, only listened curiously as Morgan told him about what he was.

  Morgan floats along carelessly, until he can feel the worried voices brushing across his skin, echoing through the water.

  “We were so worried!” Naida snaps as he beaches himself. She runs into him, bumping him with her nose.

  Mother is sitting by the cliffside, watching as Morgan ambles up to her.

  “Sorry, I lost track of time,” Morgan says.

  “We were beginning to wonder if you had been stolen,” Linneth says, and Morgan instantly feels guilty for making everyone worry. He cuddles up to her, feeling the solid comfort of her warmth. The sharp smell of relief is in the air, and Morgan huddles under her flipper as he did when he was a pup.

  “How was your day?” Dorian asks. “Did you watch any more movies?”

  The usual group huddles around them, eagerly waiting for Morgan to describe more of his adventures.

  Morgan hesitates. “No, no movies today.”

  Dorian groans.

  “What did you do?” Naida asks. “Are you mating, is that what you’re doing? Humans do it differently, it requires quite a bit of preparation—”

  “No, no, we’re not doing that,” Morgan takes a deep breath, waiting for everyone to be quiet. “I told Kevin I’m a selkie. Showed him, too.” He smiles, remembering Kevin’s awed look.

  The rest of the selkies start mumbling, then talk over one another in short, panicked barks.

  “Accidental reveals are one thing, but this is someone Morgan’s been seeing for quite some time,” Morgan’s uncle Dinar says. “It won’t be something he easily forgets.”

  Someone nods. “Linneth, didn’t you just tell us the dangerous ones were back?”

  “What? What dangerous ones?” Morgan asks.

  “You haven’t been around much, but I heard that this bunchbadly injured one of the members of a herd that is summering on Vancouver. It was before the herd left their other home. The dangerous ones wish to capture us at any cost.”

  “And do what?” Morgan asks in horror.

  “Study us, dissect us, whatever it is, it isn’t good,” Naida butts in.

  Linneth waits until the talking ceases. “Do not panic,” she says loudly. “I do not know if these are the same hunters who took Andav from the northern iced lands. But one of them was spotted in Piedras Blancas. The Sea has told me to be careful. I do not want anyone swimming near the Moon’s Eye or south of it. If Morgan has chosen to reveal his true nature to this Kevin, it is because he trusts him. We should trust Morgan.”

  Morgan feels proud as her flipper rests on his back, and everyone looks at him. “As you know, Morgan is sixteen years of age now. This is his last year. It is a good experience for him, to learn the human way, and for him to have a relationship with this boy.”

  The rest of the seals murmur in agreement, and slowly disband, either to find a spot on the beach to sleep for the night, or to return to the incoming tide, to sleep amidst the waves.

  “What do you mean, my last year?” Morgan asks, turning the words over in his head.

  “Your last year as a child, of course,” Linneth says. “Don’t worry about it. When the summer is over, we will leave here, and you will have plenty of memories of lovi
ng this boy to warm your heart.”

  Something unsettles Morgan, the way his mother’s eyes shift, the way she says memories.

  When the summer is over, the Request will be fulfilled.

  Morgan doesn’t want to think about it.

  Nine.

  They fall into a routine. Now that Kevin knows Morgan’s secret, there’s no more mystery about where he goes when he’s not hanging out with Kevin. Morgan hides his pelt somewhere else, and he asks if Kevin wants to go with him, but Kevin refuses, even though it would be cool. He wants to show Morgan that he doesn’t care where it’s hidden, that he has nothing in common with those people in the stories who want to find the pelts to keep their selkie lovers human. The slow smile that spreads across Morgan’s face when Kevin tells him this is completely worth giving up a little bit of his curiosity.

  Morgan has his secret, and Kevin is glad of it. Neither of them brings up the subject of the pelt, and they spend their days in a happy, muddled mix of Kevin’s bedroom, the state park and the ocean.

  “I’ve always wanted to see the Moon’s Eye up close,” Morgan says one day while they’re walking along the beach, looking for sea glass.

  “The what?”

  Morgan points at the lighthouse off in the distance and his ears turn red. “I wanted to ask before, but I didn’t know what the human name for it was.”

  “The lighthouse!” Kevin grins at him. “Well, light station, technically, but no one calls it that.”

  They join a guided tour with a handful of tourists, and Morgan listens to the history with rapt fascination. Kevin’s been here too many times to count, but it’s refreshing to experience it again with Morgan.

  “I like that the light helps to guide humans and their ships back to shore,” Morgan says at the end of the tour. They’re in the gift shop and Morgan turns over a little lighthouse model in his hands, tracing the light. “We’ve always called it the Moon’s Eye because it shines at night, watchful, even when the moon isn’t out.”