Galactic Fist of Legend

by Scottie Futch

  Just as he left the bridge he heard the snapping sound once more and looked back. The goldfish had leapt again, but this time it turned and looked at him mid leap. Physics be damned, it floated in the air for a moment then slowly widened its fishy mouth into a wide grin. It offered him a saucy wink, and then waggled the strange little ridges above its eyes like they were eyebrows before splashing down into the river once more.

  Scott stared at the empty air flatly for a moment then snorted. "Sorry. I don't swing that way fella."

  He continued traveling and eventually found a new road. He turned left since he could see a sign in the distance and upon arrival a relieved smile appeared on his lips. "Five miles to Yellow Blossom."

  No hard jumps made themselves apparent and the area seemed wide open. The obstacles that presented themselves were easily avoided simply by stepping around them or hopping on top of them. At the end of the road he reached the final obstacle, another zip-line.

  On another floating island in the distance, he saw what looked to be a small town if a town could be made out of oversized fruits and vegetables. Mostly, he saw gourd houses of various types including yellow squash and pumpkins. There were also a large number of mushroom houses. At the center of the town there sat a massive building that looked like a normal castle. Its banners stood resplendent in the late afternoon sun.

  "Please take one..." said Scott as he looked at the little zip-line stand, "Eh. Sure."

  He zipped down the new zip-line, his face rippling along the way, and then leapt off at the last moment. This time he made a much better landing. He even felt proud of himself momentarily. After following the directions for the return bin, he headed off toward town. At last, he could complete his mission. No more platform hopping for him! It was time to get this mission done.

  Chapter 11: Soldiers of the Shroom

  The small town of Yellow Blossom proved to be just as interesting up close as it was at a distance. Like a giant's version of a farmer's market. Mushroom capped people lived in every type of fruit or vegetable house imaginable.

  Scott took in the sights and sounds of the local color as he walked along the stone paved streets. The people seemed friendly and curious as he approached. Just like the guys who rode in the turtle mechas, these people were short. They looked completely human, but none of them rose above the height of his chest.

  "Oh my, he's a big one," said a busty girl wearing a mushroom cap like it was a sombrero. She wore what basically amounted to red lingerie with an untied see-through pink nightie covering it. A sign above the door that she leaned against read, 'Saucy Bella'. It was an apt name for a building that looked like an overgrown bell pepper.

  Hearing himself referenced, Scott walked over to the short and busty mushroom capped girl. "Hello, my name's Scott. Could you point me toward the mayor?"

  "Oh poo. Why would you want to see that silly old mayor, when you could spend a little time with me?" she said before sliding her hands along her hips in a sensual manner.

  "You make a fine sexy point there, but I do need to talk to the mayor," said Scott.

  She sighed softly. "Fine, but think of me afterward, alright? The name's Bella, Bella Pepper."

  Scott spent a brief moment discussing the whereabouts of the mayor with the ever-so-saucy Bella then set out on his way. After he left, another overly busty mushroom capped woman poked her head out of the door. "Was that a human?"

  "Yes... a big one."

  The new girl rolled her eyes then grinned. "What's with you and humans anyway? I'd be a little scared."

  Bella laughed saucily then said, "I dunno why I like 'em, but he could bust my blocks any day."

  The other girl could not help but laugh along with the sexy shroom girl. "You're crazy, girl!"

  The working girls were left behind as Scott continued on his way. The mayor's office was an oversized crown of broccoli with a set of sliding doors at the front. Scott walked up the marble stairs and made his way inside.

  A pretty young secretary waved happily at him. "Hello! Welcome to Yellow Blossom, Traveler. How may I help you?" she asked in an overly friendly tone.

  Scott smiled at her then nodded his head. "I have news for the mayor. It's about the empire."

  Her friendly smile froze on her face for a moment then her eyes widened slowly. "The empire! Uhm, oh... The mayor went to the castle today since there are a few dignitaries visiting from beyond the warp."

  "Beyond the warp?" asked Scott curiously.

  "Oh, yes. Foreign ambassadors from other worlds in alliance with the Shroom Republic. It's a fairly big deal," she said, some of her sweetness and a little of her friendly demeanor returning in the process.

  "So, I have to go to the castle?" asked Scott.

  "Yes! Just tell the guards that you have news for the mayor. Though, I suppose that Vice-Princess Lilliana will want to hear what you have to say as well."

  Scott blinked. "Vice-Princess."

  "Yes! Vice-Princess Lilliana is the first in line to the hereditary presidential seat. Everyone loves her! She's warm, and kind, a real peach of a girl," said the chatty secretary.

  "Hereditary president..." muttered Scott. How was that any different than being a king?

  The secretary smiled brightly, unaware of Scott's thoughts. "He's not in attendance today, but the princess should be available to hear your words."

  Scott thanked the cheerful girl then headed off toward the castle. It was only a short walk to the main thoroughfare that led to the only normal looking building in town. Why an ordinary medieval castle would be sitting near a town that looked like a giant vegetable garden was anyone's guess.

  He arrived at the gate to the castle and was greeted by two heavily armed soldiers. Instead of sombrero style mushroom caps, they wore white armor and helmets more befitting a soldier from Earth. There were little red circles on their helmets.

  "Hold, traveler," said one of the shroom soldiers in a deep and commanding tone. It was a surprising voice from a man only slightly taller than the average citizen in town. "What business do you have at the castle?"

  "I have to speak with the mayor regarding the empire," said Scott. He had no idea what to do in this sort of situation. He saw no point in lying to get in, and other than the fact that the empire soldiers had attacked him he knew nothing else about their group.

  "The mayor... Understood. One moment," said the deep voiced soldier. He then placed a hand to his ear and began to speak once more. "Sergeant, this is gate leader. We have someone at the gate who says that he needs to speak with the mayor."

  Scott could not hear the return communication. However, after a brief moment the soldier spoke again. "Yes. He says that he has information about the empire."

  After another brief moment the soldier spoke again, this time to Scott. "Are you a citizen of our country, or affiliated with a military unit in the alliance?"

  "No."

  "Understood," said the soldier before informing his sergeant of that fact. Once he received a response he told Scott the answer. "You will have to wait a moment, traveler. The sergeant cannot authorize you entry since you are neither citizen nor soldier of our realm. Only the colonel can authorize you."

  Scott thanked him then continued to stand around while he checked out the castle. While it gave off a medieval vibe, it also had gun turrets along the walls. Just beyond the gate, he could see soldiers stomping around in mechanized suits. They looked more like power armor than giant mechanical turtles, but they were clunky with a squarish look all the same. They did not have the streamlined look of the armor he had seen in Bounty Star.

  Scott's answer came in the form of six heavily armed shroom soldiers arriving at the gate. One of them wore a helmet with yellow circles. They each wielded a heavy rifle with an oversized bayonet attached to the top of the barrel, and wore the oversized mechanical boots that the power armored soldiers wore.

  "You are the traveler with news for the mayor?" asked the soldier with the yellow circle helm.
/>   "Yes," said Scott simply.

  "Understood. I am Sergeant Kranz, Colonel Grey has allowed you entrance to the castle but you will need to remain with this escort unit at all times," said the sergeant.

  "No problem," said Scott. He just wanted to get the job done at the moment. If he was lucky, this world would be unlocked soon. He was not too keen on platform hopping in the future, but there was no reason not to visit the place.

  Scott moved forward at the sergeant's direction, and was soon in the middle of a six shroom escort. After entering the gate Scott was able to see more of the troop movements inside.

  There were hundreds of armed soldiers, and several dozen mech-wearing troops as well. A few of them were equipped suits that sported large u-shaped torsos and oversized spherical shoulder pods. From the back, he saw triangular formations with unknown purpose. There were two on the upper back, one more in the center of the lower back, and two more on the legs where the Achilles tendon would be.

  Not long after Scott passed their location, the assembled troops were addressed. "Send 'em up!" called a power armored soldier with a blue circle helm.

  Another yellow circle helmed soldier called out, "Jump Team Alpha! Take Flight!"

  Each of the soldiers presented their arms then lowered them. Immediately afterward five blazing flames shot out of the triangular formations. The soldiers rocketed upward into the air and then began to fly around the castle in a wide circular pattern.

  Inside the castle, Scott was led along a corridor with immaculate brick work for the walls and polished concrete floors. He passed a few television screens mounted inside the walls showing that the world had developed something like modern Earth technology. The screens provided a handy map in one corner, and ran a local news broadcast. The anchorman sported a business suit with a mushroom shaped lapel pin, though he wore no cap.

  "Top story today, the arrival of the inter-realm alliance dignitaries on world three has nearly come to a conclusion. The Alliance formed by our beloved hereditary president Mu Shroom, fourth of his name, has been drawn into impending conflict with Emperor Cromwell and his inter-realm army of darkness..." Scott was ushered along the corridor before he could hear more.

  Eventually he was led to a room halfway along the next corridor. Inside the room there was short, even by present standards, man in a fine robe. Instead of the mushroom cap most people in town wore, his cap looked more like an upside down turnip. "Mayor Turnipos? We have brought the traveler."

  "Ah, good," said the mayor. He looked to Scott then said, "Ah. A human. Very nice, are you from one of the major houses?"

  "No, nothing like that. I'm just a traveler passing through. I needed to tell you what I saw," said Scott.

  "Of course, of course! You had information about the empire."

  "Yes. A large ship of some kind dropped four soldiers of mechanical turtle armor near my location. They attacked, but before I was able to stop them they mentioned something about orders to bring all humans to the empress alive."

  "This news... is most distressing," said the mayor. "Where did this take place?"

  "I'm not particularly familiar with your land. I was on a large floating wildflower garden. I had to cross over a few floating blocks, a bridge with a weird catfish, and go down three zip lines to get here. If that helps."

  "Sounds like you were on an upper layer. How long ago did all this happen?"

  "Sometime this morning. I came as fast as I could," said Scott.

  "I see." The mayor turned to the sergeant. "You'll need to alert the vice-princess."

  "Ah. Sorry, sir. The vice-princess just left ten minutes ago to greet the last arriving dignitaries at the castle in the third layer."

  Scott tried to maintain a neutral expression, but it was quite difficult. Trying not to laugh, he asked, "So, your princess is in another castle?"

  "Yes," said the sergeant without missing a beat. He then looked to the mayor. "Princess Violeta is still here, however."

  The mayor nodded. "That would be fine. She can inform the president."

  It seemed a little odd that the people he was speaking with needed someone else to talk to the president on their behalf, but Scott let it go. This was a different world, and followed different rules.

  In a way it made sense. Why was he asked to speak with the mayor of one town, when the actual rulers of the kingdom were available? There was obviously a chain of command.

  The guards showed no interest in taking Scott to meet with their princess. Instead, he was asked to completely reiterate everything that he'd seen and experienced since the meeting with the Kupathian turtle troopers.

  The mayor stared at him hard when he said that he'd eaten both a gravitas flower and a boom seed. The scrutiny made Scott feel more than a little uncomfortable, as the room grew silent. Even the shroom soldiers seemed quieter than before and they were fairly stoic to from the beginning.

  "You... You claim to have eaten a gravitas flower and a boom seed?" asked Turnipos. Shock and more than a little disbelief laced his tone.

  "Well, yeah. They kept saying eat me. Seemed rude not to..."

  "If you have eaten the seed of boom, can you show me?" asked the mayor, his eyebrows pressed together and his head lowered as he spoke.

  "Sure," he said.

  Scott held out his hands and called the fire. Twin orbs of blazing flame appeared before his palms.

  Mayor Turnipos hopped back in surprise. The soldiers murmured something that sounded both surprised and slightly awed.

  "Just who are you stranger? Only the royal family and legendary heroes can utilize two powers at once. Even the most revered warriors of our realm can only use one at a time and will suffer terrible internal injuries over time while the power is used."

  Scott willed the flames away. "No one particularly special. The rules of a world don't always influence me as much as someone else."

  "I see," said the mayor solemnly. "Just like them..."

  "Them?" asked Scott.

  Mayor Turnipos shook his head. "It doesn't matter. Our people thank you for your diligence on our behalf, traveler. The castle will be off-limits for the next few days, but I can offer you a small reward and a free stay at the Yellow Blossom Hotel."

  "That would be great, actually," said Scott. He did not know how much longer he would be in this world now that his introductory mission was finished. It was still nice that he'd be getting something out of the deal.

  The soldiers led him back out of the room, but then continued down the corridor instead of returning the way that they originally came. Scott asked about the reason behind it.

  "The patrol pattern changed while we were speaking with the mayor. We have to follow the new pattern while moving you."

  Mollified by that answer, Scott continued onward with the soldier in silence. However, that silence did not last for long as shouting erupted around the next corner.

  A tall blond haired man with delicately tapered elven ears pounded on an ornate door. "Princess Vita! What's the meaning of this?"

  The door opened to reveal a glorious blond elven woman wearing a colorful set of robes that were made of various shades of green. "Why, whatever do you mean Sir Chaine?" she asked in a sweet, lilting voice."

  "This! This abomination!" Chaine held up what looked to be an ordinary tunic. It was designed with varying shades of green as well.

  "What? Your glorious new court tunic? You can't wear chainmail and leather all the time, you know."

  "This is a dress!" snapped Sir Chaine, "I won't wear a dress in public."

  "It's a tunic, I assure you," replied Princess Vita in a warm tone, an amused smile on her lips.

  "Not happening," said Chaine with a heated growl.

  The soldiers stopped completely, either to gawk at the scene or to access whether they needed to intervene, Scott did not know. Either way, the little quarrel before them continued.

  "Sir Chaine! I am your princess and you will indulge me in this," she said before she closed t
he door with a haughty huff.

  Sir Chaine glared at the door for a moment then threw up his hands and spat out the words, "Well. Excuu-use me, princess."

  Chaine started muttering as he walked away, but then called back. "I'm not wearing a dress!"

  He took two steps before the door shot open. "It's a tunic! You'll wear it and like it!" shouted the princess.

  "I'll wear pants if I do!" snapped Chaine.

  Vita gasped loudly then placed a hand to her maidenly chest. "You beast... You are supposed to wear tight leggings with this sort of thing. How could you ruin such a beautiful tunic with common pants?"

  "Whatever," muttered Chaine as he walked off, "Saved the kingdom countless times and the princess wants me to strut around in a dress."

  "Tunic!" shouted the princess before slamming her door in a huff once more.

  The soldiers stood at attention and saluted as Chaine passed them by. The annoyed elf did not notice them, though he did briefly notice the man in the center. It was hard not to notice. He was the only man in the castle that was taller than he was.

  The first thing that came to Scott's mind was a simple theme song. "Doo, dadada doo, da doot doo," he whispered as the soldiers started forward once more.

  Chaine stopped dead in his tracks and turned toward the man being led down the corridor. "The World Song... How can he know a tune so close to it?"

  He decided to casually shadow the guards as they led the man out of the castle. Curious about the towering figure in their midst, he wanted to see what he was doing.

  "So, who were they?" asked Scott curiously.

  "Princess Vita, and her royal guard Sir Chaine. They are visiting dignitaries from beyond the warp. They come from a world known as Ha' Ruul."

  Scott could not help but think that his entire life story to date should be boiled down to one title, Copyright Infringement: A Lawsuit in the Making. Still, the worlds that he visited so far only seemed to speak to a certain design motif. Some things were similar, but most were still drastically different from what one might consider to be the source material.