Zoey And The Nice Guy (Big Girl Panties #1)

by Carter Ashby

  Maya smiled. “I know,” she said softly. “Don’t worry about it. The kids are used to cursing.”

  Zoey put her hand on her stomach at the mild wave of nausea that passed. She’d just been compared to Damon. She drew herself up and determined to make more of an effort to keep a civilized tongue.

  “You know, Kellen’s always liked you,” Maya said.

  “Bullsh—I mean, bullcrap. He’s just too nice-guy to say anything mean about anyone.”

  “That’s not true. He’s very honest, even if he is nice. He likes you. He’s just confused about why you don’t like him.”

  Zoey smiled at the thought. “Good. Too many women fawn all over him. He needs someone like me hating him irrationally to keep his ego from getting too inflated.”

  “So you dislike him on principle?” Maya asked.

  “Pretty much.”

  Maya tried to grin, but the attempt was pitiful. Her voice was so weak. She was frail. Too thin, too broken. Not at all the woman she should be. Zoey bit back a pang of grief. “It’s not his fault,” she said. “It’s just hard to like anything related to Damon.”

  Addy stroked Maya’s hair. The kids talked and giggled in the background. Zoey couldn’t help thinking how different this was from when they used to gather around Maya after her father had hurt her. Back then, they’d banded together, closer than sisters. Now, with Addy dividing her time between here and her graduate program in St. Louis, and Maya busy with family, they’d lost some of that tightness.

  Zoey hated it. She wanted to push everything out of their lives that was keeping them apart. She wanted to go back to the way things were before Maya had gotten pregnant.

  Zoey sensed movement and glanced out the window to see Kellen’s truck pulling in her driveway. He usually rode a motorcycle, but she supposed it was too cold.

  She stood to meet him at the door, thinking she’d take what he’d brought and send him on his way. But he had two, big duffel bags slung over his shoulders and a box in his arms. He smiled at her like he was happy to see her.

  She frowned and stepped out of his way, deciding to make him carry everything himself. He delivered the kids’ stuff to their room just as cheerful as Santa Claus and helped them unpack and even played with some of their race cars for a while. Zoey found herself leaning in the doorway, mesmerized.

  “Wanna play?” Kellen asked.

  “Not with you,” she said.

  His smile faltered briefly before he turned his attention back to the kids. Zoey returned to the living room, shaking her head and wondering who he thought he was.

  “Who does he think he is?” she asked, plopping into her chair. She immediately jumped back up and headed to the kitchen for a glass of wine. “Y’all want some of this?”

  “Yes, please,” Addy said.

  “Not supposed to mix it with my pain meds,” Maya lamented, so Zoey poured her some juice in a wine glass.

  “So what’s your problem with him now?” Addy asked as Zoey sat back down.

  “My problem is he’s such a fake. I’m sorry, but nobody’s that nice. I just feel like I’m being lied to whenever I’m face-to-face with him.”

  “You’d certainly never bother to spare his feelings, would you?” Addy asked the obvious question with a weird smirk on her face.

  “Hell, no. I’ll tell him straight up what I think of him.”

  From behind her, Kellen cleared his throat. He was leaning on the wall at the corner of the hallway and the living room. He didn’t even look at Zoey, not that she would have cared if he did. She wanted him to know that she hated him. Even if her face was a little red at being caught talking about him.

  “Maya, I gotta head home. Is there anything you need?”

  “No, thank you, baby,” she said, sounding completely drunk.

  Kellen grinned. “What have they got you on?”

  “Some really good stuff. You have a good night, now.”

  “I will. Got a date with Celeste. You liked her, right?”

  “She’s a doll,” Maya said. “Your best pick yet.”

  He grinned and kissed her on top of her head. Then he headed to the door and glanced back. “Zoey, can I talk to you for a sec?”

  Zoey considered telling him to fuck off, but then she remembered her resolution to clean up her language. She stood and followed him outside, wondering if he would yell at her again.

  He headed down her porch steps, across her lawn, and stopped at his truck. She stopped a few steps behind him, hugging herself to keep warm.

  Kellen turned to face her. His hands were in his pockets and he was frowning thoughtfully at the ground. “I guess you got a right to hate me. I can’t change that and wouldn’t even begin to know how. But you got my family in there. You’re going to have to let me be a part of this.” He looked up then, his eyes meeting hers.

  “Oh, I am?” she challenged. “I’m going to have to let you?”

  He nodded. “Yeah.”

  Yeah, well, she guessed he had a point, disappointed as she was to acknowledge it.

  “Would it make you feel better to just yell at me or something?” he asked. “You’ve never given me a point-by-point breakdown of what I did to piss you off. I’m happy to stand here and take it if we could just be done with it.”

  God, he made her sick. She literally felt like she was gonna puke. She shook her head in disgust. “It’s things like that, Kellen. What is that? What the fuck is the matter with you?”

  He shrugged, nonplussed. “I’m just trying to make this easier for both of us.”

  “By inviting me to tear you down? Jesus, it’s like early Christmas. I think I’ll take you up on it. Where to start…okay, I hate your brother and you’re related to him, so that makes you suspect. I hate the way you dress.”

  He looked down at his leather jacket, torn jeans, and boots.

  “I hate how you make your hair stick up like that; you’re a grown man for God’s sake! I wish you’d just act like a normal person once in a while. You’re so nice it makes me wanna vomit, and I cannot stand the way you call Maya ‘Sis.’ She’s not your sister. We never wanted you in our little group, but you always came around anyway, like you just had no fucking clue we couldn’t stand you.”

  She skidded to a stop, fully aware that she should have stopped a full sentence ago. His expression was controlled and careful, but it was as close to angry as she’d ever seen him.

  The muscles in his jaw twitched, but his voice was just as calm as ever. “I’m sorry you feel that way. I’m sorry I’ve intruded. Do you feel better getting that off your chest?”

  She didn’t. “Yeah,” she lied defiantly.

  “Good. Because now we’re going to act like adults—“

  “Don’t you dare talk down to me like that!”

  He held up his hands in surrender. “Okay. I’m sorry.”

  She wanted to laugh at what a coward he was. Hell, she was grinning just out of sheer awe. Why would he never fight back?

  “The thing is, Zoey, like I said, that’s my family in there. She is my sister. Has been for years. And I love my niece and nephew more than you seem to understand. So…find some way to come to terms with that, okay?”

  “You can’t come over here anytime you damn well please. It’s my house, and I don’t want you here.”

  His fists actually clenched before he forced them to relax.

  She sighed. “I guess if you call first or wait until I’m gone—“

  “God, Zoey, you’re such a bitch!”

  There it was. He closed his eyes and took some calming breaths.

  “No, don’t stop,” she said. “What else you got for me?”

  He opened his eyes, and, for the first time ever, there was fire in them. He stepped toward her and pointed at her. “Here’s how it’s going to be. I’m going to visit my sister and her kids whenever. The fuck. I want. And you’re going to keep your goddamn mouth shut about how much you hate me, especially around those kids. You’ve got no right b
admouthing me where they can hear. You understand all that?”

  She pressed her lips together to keep from grinning. “Yeah, I understand.”

  He stepped back, the fire in his eyes replaced by stunned confusion. He blew out a breath and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry to have to talk to you like that, but you’ve left me no choice.”

  She did laugh, then. She couldn’t help herself. “What’s next, Kellen? Are you gonna spank me and send me to bed?”

  He actually blushed.

  She stopped laughing and arched her brow. “Is that what you want, Kellen? To spank me?” She was possessed of the desire to flirt. Like a warrior who’d finally met her match on the field of battle, she found a kinship with her enemy, and, in her case, a sudden and exciting attraction.

  Kellen, however, paled. “I’d never hit a woman.”

  It was ice water to her spirit. She felt awful for forgetting Maya’s situation like that. She straightened her posture and expression. “I’m sorry. I was just teasing you. It was completely inappropriate. I have a problem with my brain-to-mouth filter.”

  “I’ve noticed.”

  She bit back a smile. “I prefer you honest, just so you know.”

  “I’m not overly concerned with what you prefer right now, Zoey.”

  She closed her eyes. “Mmm. Just like that.” She grinned and winked at him.

  At last he relaxed, smiling, blushing, and looking down at his feet. “I’m going home. Just…stay away from the house and from Damon, okay? I’d hate it if you got—”

  “Hurt?” She lifted the hem of her shirt, again, flashing her little Ruger.

  “Arrested,” he finished.

  “Psh. Please, I’ve got a license.”

  “To carry, not to kill. Be careful, okay?”

  She nodded. “I will. But tell your brother,” She drew her gun and held it in a grip pointed down in front of her and, in her best Dirty Harry voice said, “‘when an adult male is chasing a female with intent to commit rape, I shoot the bastard. That’s my policy.’”

  “Jesus, Zoey. You’re quoting Clint Eastwood now?”

  “‘Do ya feel lucky? Punk?’”

  “You’re certifiably insane,” he laughed.

  She tucked her pistol back in its holster. “I guess that’s why Elliot at the gun store wouldn’t sell me a .44 Magnum.”

  “We can all thank God for that. So, I’m thinking it’s weird that you’ve not only seen, but can quote, Dirty Harry.”

  “They play old movies on television. I’ve watched everything Clint Eastwood is in. I have this weird mix of feelings. Sometimes I wish he was my father. Sometimes I wish I could marry him. And sometimes I just wish I could be as badass as his characters.” She shrugged and holstered her gun.

  Zoey looked up and made eye contact. Suddenly there was a long, uncomfortable silence. At last he cocked his head, his smile still in place, but his eyes narrowing a little. “Did we just have a friendly interchange?”

  She stiffened. My God, he was right. They’d been friendly with each other. Eww. “No,” she said defensively. “Get off my property, Kellen.”

  He ducked down and looked in her eyes. “You just showed me your soft side, Zoey. I’m not afraid of you anymore.” And then the bastard tapped her on the nose, turned, and left.

  She stormed inside, and Addy immediately asked, “What did he do this time?”

  “Nothing,” Zoey said. “I just don’t like him.”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  “Is the lamb good?” he asked.

  Celeste was quietly nibbling on her dinner across the table from him. He’d wanted to take her some place nice—some place where they wouldn’t run into anyone they knew, so he’d driven her into the city to an Italian restaurant on The Hill.

  She smiled sweetly. “It’s very good.”

  Everything about her was sweet. She was petite and soft around the edges. She always blushed a little when she smiled, and she smiled a lot. Best of all, she said nice things to him. She didn’t curse at him or hate him for no reason at all. “What do you wanna do after this?” he asked, gazing at her. He’d forgotten all about his own dinner.

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. I haven’t been to the city since I was a little girl. What is there?”

  “Museums, theaters…hotels.”

  She reddened and ducked her head so low he couldn’t see her expression. He suspected she was grinning and trying to think of something clever to say, until he saw her shoulders shaking. Her hands went to her face and a sob escaped her lips.

  Kellen hurried to offer comfort, but when he touched her, she flinched away. “I’m so sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have come on to you like that. I didn’t mean it. This is only our sixth date, so—“

  “It’s just I haven’t been with anyone since Chris,” she sobbed loudly. Too loudly. Who knew such a little person could cry so hard. He glanced around the room and offered a reassuring smile to the gawkers.

  “I completely understand. Just forget I said—“

  “I’m still in love with him!” she cried unabated.

  “It’s okay, Celeste, this is just a date, it’s not—“

  “I want to have sex. I want it so bad, but I can’t get him out of my head!”

  Kellen pressed his lips together. He moved to her side of the booth to give her some privacy from the room, and to give himself some. This was one of the more humiliating dates he’d been on in his life. Not the most humiliating, unfortunately, but close.

  “I’m so sorry!” she bawled at the top of her lungs. She threw her arms around his neck and clung to him, drenching the front of his shirt with her tears.

  The waiter came and discreetly handed him the bill. Kellen just as discreetly handed him his credit card and mouthed the words, “Hurry, please.”

  “I just wish I was attracted to you!”

  He was now officially the most pathetic man in the room. “It’s okay, Celeste. Please, don’t stress over this.”

  “It’s almost like you’re too pretty. Like a woman. Chris was rugged and manly.”

  “Really, it’s okay. Let’s just wait until we’re in the truck—“

  “I thought about him when I was making out with you last week! I’m so sorry!”

  The waiter brought his card and receipt back. Kellen quickly signed it, leaving a big tip, and then pulled Celeste out of the booth and away from the restaurant he was never going to set foot in again as long as he lived. He then embarked on the longest forty-five minute drive of his life. Fortunately, there were no awkward silences. No, Celeste just went on and on about Chris’s virtues as a man and how Kellen just couldn’t live up to him.

  After he got her home and inside, he drove straight to Harley’s, a bar owned by his best friend, Jayce. The place wasn’t trashy, really, though the waitresses did dress in Daisy Duke cutoffs and skimpy tank tops. Kellen had always wondered how Jayce, ultimately a pretty decent guy, could make his waitresses dress that way.

  The building had potential. The walls were bare brick and the base of the bar was built of brick, too. The floors were rustic wood planks. There was a stage and dance floor off to the left, but Jayce never made use of them. To the right were a few pool tables and dart boards. The majority of the space was tables.

  Kellen bellied up to the bar.

  “What’s up?” Jayce asked, sliding a beer across the counter. Jayce was a big guy, with a square jaw and a perpetually serious expression. In addition to the bar, he also owned a gym where he boxed—for fun, he said. Never professionally, just in practice for the guys who did box professionally.

  Most people found Jayce intimidating on first acquaintance. Kellen, however, had once seen him cry in Kindergarten when a group of girls threatened to kiss him. He could never be intimidated after that. “Bad date.”

  “You need a whiskey with that then?”

  Kellen shook his head. He wasn’t a hard drinker. He just needed a couple of beers and a few moments of normalcy. A da
y of managing crying women and shrieking harpies had left him exhausted.

  Jayce moved down the bar to refill some drinks and then came back, leaning on his forearms. “So this was Celeste, right? What happened? I figured she’d be perfect for you.”

  “She might have been, but I was not perfect for her.”

  Jayce arched a brow, inviting him to elaborate.

  Kellen just shook his head. “She’s still hung up on her ex. I don’t know. She was so sweet. Or, at least, she seemed that way.”

  “Maybe you need to look for a different quality of woman. Sweet don’t seem to be working for you.”

  A flash of Zoey and her fiery red hair crossed his mind. He shivered. “No. I definitely want sweet.”

  Jayce twisted his lips in thought. “Rick’s got a sister. Hey, Rick!”

  Rick was over at the pool tables. He looked back over his shoulder.

  “You got a sister, right? She’s pretty sweet, ain’t she?” Jayce asked.

  Rick straightened and faced him. “Now you keep your goddamn hands off my sister, Jayce.”

  Jayce broke into a devilish grin. “No promises, but I was thinking about for Kellen, here.”

  “Oh, Kellen? Yeah, man, Kellen’s cool. You want her number?”

  Kellen wasn’t sure how to feel about this. He knew in his mind that it was a good thing to have a reputation of treating women positively, but the guy could have at least pretended to feel threatened. Rick came over and took Kellen’s phone, programming his sister’s number. Beverly was her name.

  “Yeah, I’ve seen her around,” Kellen muttered as Rick went back to his table. “Maybe I’ll call her.”

  “Problem solved, then,” Jayce said.

  Kellen turned to look at Rick. “Hey! How come you gave me her number, but not Jayce?”

  Rick looked like he thought that was a pretty dumb question. “Jayce’s a dog. But you’re a nice guy, Kellen. Everyone thinks so.”

  Kellen frowned, then he turned back to his beer. “Is it a problem that I’m a nice guy?”

  Jayce shrugged. “Why would it be?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe women don’t really want nice guys. Maybe it’s not considered masculine to be nice.”