This Regret

by Victoria Ashley

  Cape grabs me by the neck and forces me to stand above Kellan. "Enough!" Kellan looks up with flared nostrils, clearly pissed off to see Cape handling me. "This is my place and it's my rules here. Unless you want to see this pretty face smashed into the ground, I suggest you back the fuck up and play my game."

  Shaking his head, Kellan holds his hands up and backs away from the bloody guy on the ground. Him and the woman glance at each other with a look of recognition, before he turns back to face Cape. "Alright! Fuck! Just don't hurt her. I'll do whatever you ask."

  Cape snorts and laughs loudly. "Yeah, you already proved that. You must have gotten stupid over the years though. You haven't been a man of your word lately and I'm not a patient man. I don't like when people disobey me."

  Kellan's eyes meet mine and I can see he is hurting. I'm so confused. None of this is making sense. He takes a step toward us, but stops when Cape pulls me against his chest. I hear Kellan growl as his fists clench at his sides. "Neither am I," Kellan states. "Get your hands off her."

  I close my eyes, feeling dirty as Kellan watches Cape run his finger up my leg. Knowing Kellan is watching this is making me sick to my stomach. "Is that what you want me to do?"

  I hear what sounds like a crate being broken against the ground before I hear someone being tackled and a bunch of feet moving. I don't dare to open my eyes; afraid of what I'll see in front of me. There's no way Kellan can take on all these men, plus Cape and his gun.

  "I'll tell you what. I will stop touching her, caressing her, and fondling her after you two have a little chat and you properly introduce her to your old friend over there. Then, when you're done, I get to do the same to you."

  What does that mean? This is killing me. I open my eyes to see Kellan, on his knees, staring over at Echo, with Cape's two men holding his arms behind his back. The shorter one, presses his boot into his back, while the other one yanks his head to the side.

  The sight instantly rips open my heart, causing tears to stream down my face. "Don't hurt him," I cry. "Please, stop."

  Cape presses his lips to my ear and Kellan growls softly. "Oh don't worry, sugar. Soon, he won't be able to feel anything; just like my brother over here. I was going to do a brother for brother, but . . . nah. I changed my mind."

  The two men drag Kellan over so he's kneeling down in front of Echo. Then Cape pulls me over to stand above him, pressing the barrel of the gun underneath my chin. "Look up, Kellan," he demands.

  Kellan brings his eyes up to meet mine, but I can hardly see him through the tears now. He just sits there, looking ashamed and broken. I want to reach out to him, to hold him and comfort him, but I can't. I have a feeling one of us may die. My heart says it will be him.

  Even on his knees, before me, he works on soothing me. "I won't let anyone hurt you, okay?" I close my eyes as he continues, "I will die first. You are the only thing that matters to me. Whatever happens today, remember that."

  I hear laughter in my ear as Kellan's head gets yanked back, hard. "Well isn't that sweet. He has a heart after all. I guess you finally got tired of using women like dish rags. Is that all you have to say, Romeo? Don't you have a story to tell? Some fucking introductions to do?"

  Kellan closes his eyes and spits on the ground before looking back up at me with worried eyes. He's silent for a moment, just staring at me until the short guy knees him in the back, causing him to clear his throat and speak. "I worked hard to keep Adric away from those pills. I knew he was addicted, depressed and lost." He stops and swallows. "When I found him in his room that day, the first thing I did was come here looking for Cape because I knew where they had come from. I got here expecting to find Cape to get my answer. When I got here, Echo was the only one here. He was sitting there with a huge grin on his face as if he knew why I was here. He knew I found out Adric was still getting the pills. I knew Adric didn't get them directly from Cape or his men, but I knew someone was going between them, supplying Adric when I wasn't around. When I confronted Echo about it and demanded he tell me where Adric had still been getting them, he laughed in my face and talked down on Adric, calling him a piece of shit loser that deserved to die."

  His eyes close for a moment, him taking a few deep breaths before continuing. "I lost it, baby. I fucking lost it. Adric was my brother. How could someone laugh in my face about him dying? No one hurts my family. I love them to death and will do anything to protect them. I took it out on Echo and made him pay for his mistakes. I had many talks with Echo beforehand, warning him of Adric's behavior. He ignored that. I had to deal with him. I almost killed a man. Look at him. I'm a fucking monster, driven by pain and anger.”

  My eyes wander over to Echo, whose eyes are on Kellan, kneeling in front of him. His face looks different from before; almost sad as he stares at Kellan. I don’t know what to make of this, but I have a feeling he’s here against his own will.

  I just look at him sitting there, then to my surprise he moves. He places his hand on the wheel and spins his chair around so he’s facing the back wall. Wait! What? He’s been able to move this whole time and yet he sat there looking at me as if he had no choice. His eyes never left mine. What was he thinking? What is he thinking?

  “Nothing to say, Echo? You can’t even look at the man that put you there. This is your chance to watch him suffer through your pain.” Cape kneels down in front of his brother and grabs his face. “You, my brother, are going to watch him suffer. I haven’t waited eight years for this shit for you not to watch. Fuck!”

  Walking over to where Kellan’s still kneeling on the ground, Cape swings his arm back, slamming the gun into the side of Kellan’s head. The crack of the blow echoes throughout the building as Kellan falls over on his side, his face hitting the concrete. “Get the fuck up, you pussy bitch!”

  I scream at the top of my lungs as Kellan pushes himself to his feet just to get beat back down to the ground. No matter how many times he gets punched or kicked, he still won’t seem to stay down. He won’t back down; although, he doesn’t put up a fight. He just takes the beaten as if he deserves it.

  I try to plead with him to stop, but his eyes never meet mine. He does everything he can to keep his eyes out of my view. His face is bloody and swollen now, his body covered in dirt and dust from the building, the blows coming in smaller dosages now.

  The sounds of the punches and impacts of the blows, causes bile to rise in my throat. I turn beside me and vomit on the person holding me back. I get thrown to the ground, the air getting knocked out of me once again.

  Kellan’s head tilts my direction and suddenly, he’s rushing to his feet. “I will fuckin’ kill you.” Just as he’s about to make it to me, he gets shoved against the wall by Cape’s two morons.

  I feel my head get yanked backwards as someone drags me across the floor by my hair. I’m screaming so loud it hurts my own ears. “Is that what makes you fight? It’s her! How does this make you feel, Kellan? Does it hurt watching someone you love get hurt? Huh?” Cape’s voice sounds next to my ear. He pulls me up to my feet. “Time for the knife; see how he feels about that.”

  I watch in horror as the tall guy pulls out a knife, pins Kellan’s hand to the wall and stabs it through his hand, causing Kellan to scream out in pain. He bangs his head into the wall behind him while biting his bottom lip. The knife is holding his hand to the wall and blood is pouring down his hand.

  My stomach twists into knots as Humpty punches Kellan in the gut one last time. “No! Stop! Please don’t hurt him anymore. Please,” I cry. “I will do anything you want. Just please leave him alone.”

  Cape laughs in my ear and turns behind him. “Maxine, get Echo out of here; both of you, now!”

  Reaching under my dress, he hooks his index finger under the crotch of my panties and tugs, pulling them down my legs. I squirm in his arms and a sob escapes me.

  “Anything, huh,” he asks huskily. “I know exactly what I want.” He looks over at Kellan as he gets my panties down to my knees and they fall th
e rest of the way because I'm trying to clamp my legs together. He begins unbuckling his belt and slides his pants and underwear down his legs “I'm going to stand here and fuck your girl and you're going to sit there and watch. I bet she feels so tight and good. Do you want to watch me cum all in what is yours? It doesn't feel good to know someone you care about is at the hands of another, does it? “He begins rubbing his bare erection against my backside and I begin gagging.

  Screaming, Kellan fights to break free from the wall, but both men are holding his good arm back. He struggles with his other hand before he rips his flesh through the knife, hurling his fist into the nearest one’s face.

  The sight of the blood dripping down Kellan’s hand makes me cry even harder, but it’s not enough to slow him down. He breaks free of the two guys and charges at Cape. “You son of a bitch! Get your hands off her.”

  Cape’s grip on me releases as he jerks his pants up his hips and attempts to reach for his gun. Kellan tackles him to the ground, punching him in the face while holding him down by the throat. He looks over at me and mouths for me to run.

  I shake my head, but he mouths it again. I don’t want to leave him. I can’t just leave him. Looking around me, I see all of the men keeping a close eye on the fight on the ground. No one knows for sure what to do without Cape barking orders at them.

  Hesitating for a moment, I yank my panties up, run for the door and reach for the handle, making my way outside. It only takes a few seconds before I hear footsteps behind me.

  The blast of a 38-caliber revolver sends me crashing to my knees, landing in the road, with gravel digging deep into the flesh of my knees.

  My hands grip the gritty ground, as if my life depends on it, making my fingers bleed. Who knows, at this point, maybe it does.

  Even with my eyes closed, I can feel the world spinning around me, my body threatening to give up and lose what control I have left. Tears stream down my horror-stricken face and a silent scream is threatening to form in my throat. It hurts. It hurts like hell.

  That’s when I hear it. A bloodcurdling scream that makes my blood run cold. Except, it’s not my screaming that is roaring through my ears as I expected.

  It’s the screaming of a woman. A very angry, hysterical woman.

  The only thing I can decipher is, “Call 911. Somebody fucking call 911. There’s blood everywhere.”

  I can hear bodies shuffling nearby, some of them even tripping over me to get away, but I can only process one thought. He’s gone. Please don’t let him be gone.

  With force, I am yanked to my feet, a large hand smacking me across the face, causing blood to taste on my tongue.

  I try to focus, but my vision is too blurred to make any sense of who has control of my body and at this point, I’m not so sure it even matters.

  “This is your fault,” the deep voice growls as I spit blood onto his filthy boots. Narrowing his eyes, he wraps my hair securely around his hand and yanks my head back, hard, while his other hand tightens around my throat, squeezing. “You’re going to pay for this if it’s the last thing I do, you stupid bitch.”

  He lets go of my neck and shoves me down to the ground so that my face is pressed into the gravel, his boot crushing into the back of my skull. Dirt and rocks dig into my left eye, making it even harder to see through the tears. I desperately look for the man that hasn’t only crushed then stolen my heart just to crush it again, but has also replaced a part of me that I thought was long ago lost.

  Realizing that my search is pointless, I just lay there defeated, feeling half-alive, but mostly dead. “Go ahead,” I whisper. “See if you can hurt me anymore than you already have. I dare you.” My body’s trembling, but I look him dead in the eye anyways. I’m not scared of dying. Not after losing the biggest part of me, my heart. “Losing him will be my last regret.” I shift so that I’m looking at the deep scars that cover his face. They make me sick. He makes me sick. “That and not killing you when I had the chance.”

  I close my eyes waiting for his blow, but it doesn’t come. Instead, he is yanked from me and slammed down to the ground, beside me. Scrambling to get away, I crawl backwards with my hands and wipe at my eyes, trying to see what’s going on next to me.

  My heart beats wild in my chest and a burst of happiness surges through me when I see it’s Kellan on top of the man, beating the crap out of him. He slams his fist into his face repeatedly while growling out words I can’t understand.

  The man seems to look surprised, just lying there taking his beating, without struggle. Kellan grabs him by the hair and puts his face inches from his. “If I ever hear of you coming near my woman or my family again, I will fucking kill you. You will be dead . . . like Cape. My family is everything to me.”

  Shoving the guy’s head into the ground, Kellan stands up and walks over to me. He drops to his knees in front of me and cups my face, desperately bringing his lips to mine. “I love you so fuckin’ much. I’m so sorry,” he cries. “I’m sorry for letting them hurt you. I couldn't let him do that to you. I can't bear to see another man rubbing his hands on you.” He rubs his bloodied hands over my hair, looking me in the eyes. “I promise if you can ever forgive me, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I will never leave again and I will make sure no one ever hurts you. I promise, baby I swear I didn't know it was a set up. I would have never left if I had. You have to believe me; I need you to believe me.”

  I break out in tears, holding onto him as tight as I can. He’s alive. That’s all I can think about. I have no idea what happened in there, but he’s alive and in my arms. Just the thought of losing him made me dead inside; completely vacant of all feeling.

  He pulls me closer into his arms and we both cry. He’s holding me as if he never wants to let go. I never want him to. I want him forever. He’s my life; my everything, but . . . I know I’m about to lose him. A man is dead because of him.

  “Kellan,” I cry into his neck. “I thought you were dead.” I wrap my arm tighter around his neck and kiss him as if my life depends on it and it does, trust me it does. “I never want to lose you. I love you more than life. Don’t ever scare me again. Do you fucking hear me?” I look into his eyes, taking in his bruised and bloodied face, a sick feeling settling in my stomach. “We have to get you out of here. They’re going to come take you to jail. I can’t lose you; I won’t lose you again. We can run away together; leave the country, whatever it takes to keep us together.”

  I know I’m being irrational and not thinking, but I can’t help it. I won’t lose him again. He means everything to me. I stand up and pull him to his feet. I try pulling him away, but he stops me.

  He nods his head towards the door of the warehouse as the woman steps out the door and falls to her knees. Leaning in, he grabs my face and presses his lips next to my ear. “I didn’t shoot him, Phoenix.” He pulls away and looks at the woman crying on the ground. “It was Maxine.”

  I throw my hands to my face as more tears stream out. I know I should feel relieved, but I’m sad for the woman and very confused. She was here with Cape, not Kellan. I was right when I thought she didn’t look as if she wanted to kiss him, but still, why would she shoot her own boyfriend? “I don’t understand,” I whisper.

  “She saved my life. She’s the woman I saved from Nate that day at the bar.” He pauses and swallows hard. “It was self-defense. She made a decision knowing what the outcome could be. I don’t want you to be a part of this though. I have Tyler on his way to pick you up. I called him while I was looking for you. You’re going to leave with him and let us talk to the police.”

  I shake my head and grip his arm. “No. I’m not leaving you. I won’t go.” I grab onto him in fear of losing him. “I need to be here. What if someone hurts you?”

  He waves his arm around for me to look around us. Maxine is still down on the ground crying and no one else is in sight. They all took off after the gun fire. “I will be okay. I will come home for you. I promise.”

  I
look into his eyes. “Promise?” I whisper.

  He smiles weakly. “I would never lie to you.”

  Realizing, I have no choice in the matter, I nod my head and agree. I just hope this isn’t goodbye . . .

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Kellan

  Three months later . . .

  Grabbing her by the hips, I boost her onto the first step of the ladder that leads to our special place and close the distance between our bodies. Damn, her body still feels good beneath mine. I want her to always feel safe in my hands. She’s my woman to take care of. We've been through a lot together, but each day I love her more than the day before. “Do you think you can handle this?” I whisper into her ear with a smile. “This is much simpler than the things we do in bed.” I lean in closer to her ear. “And far less dangerous.”

  Laughing, she reaches back and slaps my arm before looking up the steps to the roof. It’s so dark outside, I’d be surprised if she can even see anything ahead of her, but she keeps staring anyways. “I’m positive I can handle this. If I can handle you in bed,” she smiles, “I can handle anything. I did do this once without you so I'm good with you behind me.” It pains me to hear of the time that I was gone and what it did to her, but it's done. All I can do is spend the rest of my life making it up to her and that's what I intend to do.

  I press my mouth to her neck and nibble as I push her up the steps, by her ass. She squirms in my arms but doesn’t scream as I bite her. She just maneuvers her hand enough to grab my cock. Mmm . . . she’s good, but not now. My dick instantly reacts to her touch, stiffening against my tight zipper. I take a deep breath and whisper in her ear, “There will be plenty of time for that later. Right now, I just want to see you smile.”

  She takes another step, getting closer to the top. My heart races with anticipation the closer we get. “Oh yeah. What is up here that’s going to make me smile?”