Vegas to Varanasi (Fortytude Series Book 1)

by Hickman, Shelly

  “Eww, no!” She wrinkles her nose. “It’s just... you know I think David’s a great guy and all, and I want things to work out.” She takes my hand. “But you need to take this alcohol thing seriously, okay?”

  “I will... I do.”

  “I mean it.”

  “So do I.” I squeeze her hand to let her know I appreciate her concern. I thought I would be okay talking this over with her, but I’m not. The reclusiveness, the drinking, the unhealthy fixation with Jason Bourne-a-be. It’s downright depressing, and I guess I don’t want her to worry.

  Despite David’s claim he’s going to turn things around, for some reason, I’m not all that optimistic.

  Nine

  About once a month, I try to have Luke and Richard over for a movie night with the kids. Sure, it’s kind of cheesy, given how old Hayden and Carly are, but we’ve been doing it for a few years, and surprisingly, the kids have yet to bow out.

  Tonight the selection is Shaun of the Dead. Luke and I have always shared a love for stupid, cornball movies. However, getting everyone else on board can be difficult. Richard likes artsy films, stuff that’s Oscar-nominated and usually nothing I’ve ever heard of. For Hayden, think anything with Jason Statham, the Rock, or Tom Cruise. And Carly, unfortunately, likes horror movies. I can’t stand horror and can barely watch the trailers in the theater.

  David is normally up for anything, but he hasn’t joined us the past couple times and, I assume, has no intention of doing so tonight.

  “Lord, which one of you two made the selection tonight?” Richard asks me and Luke. “I know it wasn’t the kids.”

  Joining them on the sofa, I raise my hand. “That would be me,” I admit and pass them a bowl of popcorn.

  Richard is twelve years older than Luke and me, so there’s a bit of a generational gap as far as what we find engaging. “Anna, I’m determined to convert you into a person who can appreciate a film that makes you think.”

  Rolling my eyes, I glance at Luke. “Well, that wasn’t the least bit pretentious.”

  Snuggled up against Hayden in the loveseat, Tessa laughs. The cooking dinner thing must have worked, despite Carly’s lack of faith in her brother.

  “Besides,” I continue, “I can appreciate a movie that makes me think, but maybe I just want to be entertained.”

  “That’s right,” Luke agrees. “Laughing is just as important, you old fart.”

  “Well, since you guys are making me endure zombie humor,” Richard says, grabbing Luke’s knee, “next time it’s my pick, I’ll bring Million Dollar Baby.”

  “Ugh, no! Not unless you wanna see me curl up in the fetal position and weep uncontrollably.”

  “Mom, you weep uncontrollably watching The Lion King,” Hayden says.

  “And your point is?”

  David wanders out from the back room, and for a moment I’m encouraged by the possibility he may join us. “So what are we watching tonight?” His eyes are trained on the TV.

  “Shaun of the Dead,” Carly replies.

  “Now that’s a classic!”

  “You, too?” Richard scoffs before he gets up from his seat. “I’m going to need some more wine for this.”

  “I was just heading to the kitchen for a refill myself,” David says.

  And there we have it.

  After the two of them leave the room, Luke smiles and pinches me on the cheek. Brother! Now I’m getting sympathy cheek pinches.

  The five of us watch the movie quietly. When they return, Richard takes his seat next to Luke, but David hovers at the side of the room with his wine glass, rocking in place on his heels.

  “Are you going to stay and watch with us, sweetie? Come over here by me.” I pat a spot beside me. “We can squeeze in and make more room.”

  “Ah, thanks, but I’ve got work to do.”

  Writing is not your work.

  “Aw, come on,” Carly persuades. “Take a break. You’ve missed the past few.”

  An indistinguishable sound comes from his mouth and he scratches his cheek. “Next time. I promise. You all enjoy the movie.” He gives me a wink before he walks back to the office.

  While keeping his eyes on the TV, Luke affectionately taps his knee to mine and Carly gives me a sad smile. It would be nice if I were the only one here who sees the awkwardness in the situation, but I guess that would be too much to ask.

  After the movie ends, we laze around a bit longer, talking about nothing in particular. However, Carly has disappeared to the back of the house and is talking with David. I can’t make out what they’re saying, but his voice is rising. It’s hard to tell if they’re joking around or if there’s a disagreement taking place.

  Apparently, I’m not the only one who notices. Hayden whispers something to Tessa, and they stand up. “It’s getting late. I’m gonna give Tessa a ride home.”

  “Oh, okay. I’m glad you could join us again, Tessa.”

  “Thank you for having me,” she says. “I had a great time. Loved the movie.”

  “I knew you had good taste.” I give her a hug.

  Now Carly’s voice is getting a bit louder, and Hayden and Tessa can’t get out the door fast enough. Richard taps Luke’s leg with the back of his hand and they are suddenly shuffling to make their departure as well. “We should be getting a move on, too,” Richard says.

  I nod slightly. “Sure. It was fun, like always.”

  “And the movie was much better than I expected,” he adds as he kisses my cheek.

  I laugh, and then Luke gives me a kiss good-bye. “Call me if you wanna talk.”

  After locking the front door behind them, I venture to the office to find out what’s going on. Carly is standing in the doorway with a hand on her hip, and David leans back in his chair facing her, but avoiding her eyes.

  “Everything okay back here?” I look from one to the other, but both of them have clammed up. “You guys managed to chase everyone out with your... whatever this is.”

  Carly’s eyes flick from David to me, then back to David. She fingers the necklace around her throat. “David, tell her.”

  “Why don’t you?” He smiles and shifts in his chair. “You seem to have everything figured out.” The amusement in his voice doesn’t conceal the bite of his words.

  Carly raises her eyebrows at him before turning to me. She opens her mouth, but nothing will come out.

  “Would somebody please tell me what is going on?”

  “I resigned my position at the university,” David blurts.

  My head flinches back. “You did? Why would you do that?”

  He leans forward on his knees and suppresses a grin. “I got offered a position as an editor with a publishing house... who also accepted my manuscript.”

  “You knew about this?” I ask Carly, trying to absorb this new information.

  Carly drops the pendant on her necklace she’d been holding between her lips. “No! I’d heard rumors on campus that David was leaving, and I just now asked him about it.”

  My stomach clenches. “Why haven’t you told me about any of this? I didn’t even know you’d been submitting your book for publication.”

  David rubs his hands down his legs. “I thought you might freak out, and I didn’t know how to tell you yet.”

  Freak out. Ya think? “Look, I’m trying to be happy for you right now, but having a little trouble with the fact that you told me nothing of any of this. And then you go and resign a tenured position without even discussing it with me? How would you feel if I made a decision like that without as much as a word to you?”

  David stares blankly at me, as if he doesn’t have the first clue how to respond to my question.

  Carly, who has been lingering in the doorway near me, takes a few steps into the room so she is standing between us. “Okay, maybe this isn’t my place, but I think we’re losing sight of what’s most important here.” She turns a concerned eye on him. “David... you have a drinking problem, and we’re worried about you.”

&nbs
p; He chuckles and his face reddens. “You’re right. It isn’t your place.”

  Heat flushes through my body, and my nails dig into my palms.

  She doesn’t seem fazed and peers at his wine glass. “How many glasses did you already have when you came out for your refill?”

  “I’m afraid you don’t know what you’re talking about.” David’s voice is controlled. “For God’s sake, you’re just a child.”

  “David!” I can’t believe he’s being so condescending.

  Carly stares at him for a moment and bites her bottom lip, then turns to me. “I’m going to bed. I’ve got an early class in the morning.”

  “Carly...” I say as she leaves. Then I whip back to face him.

  David looks away and scrubs a hand over his face.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?” My voice is shaking. “You know how much she thinks of you. She’s just worried and you’re being a total shit!”

  “I know. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry.”

  “Well, you need to say that to her.”

  “I will.”

  I pull up the harvest chair from the corner of the room and move it beside him. “What is going on with you?”

  “Nothing!” He throws up his hands. “Nothing is going on with me. And I don’t know why you guys can’t just be happy for me. This is great news.”

  “Maybe we could be happy for you if you haven’t been acting so erratically. You tell me you’re almost finished with the book, when clearly you already were. Then you say you’re going to quit writing. Next, you’re gonna let me read some of it. Then before I know it, you’ve quit your job, a stable job, I might add, for something that may not be permanent...”

  He shakes his head at me. “What do you want me to say, Anna?”

  I’m at a loss for words from his attitude and back away. “You seriously don’t find any of this bothersome?”

  “Honestly? No, I don’t.” He crosses his arms and looks somewhere past me.

  “What about the drinking?”

  “Oh my God!” He jumps out of his chair. “For the last time, I do not have a drinking problem.”

  I say nothing in response, but instead rub my forehead.

  “Do you want me to move out?”

  “What?” My eyes dart to his face. “Why would you say that?”

  David is unnaturally still. “Because I’m beginning to feel like this entire family thinks I’m a drunken, irrational loser.”

  I’m tempted to say, “If you want to leave, then leave,” because right now it just feels like he’s turning our concern into an attack so he can rationalize a way out, rather than admit he’s got some issues.

  “I’m tired, David. I’m going to bed.”

  “Fine.”

  I swallow hard, hesitating. Then I leave the room.

  Once I crawl into bed, I turn my back toward his side, and cry. I consider going to Carly’s room to check on her, but I’m a mess right now myself and don’t want her worrying more than she already is.

  A half hour later, I’m still awake when David enters and heads straight for the bathroom to brush his teeth. I need to change position since I’m still lying on the same side, but can’t face him when he comes back in. So I stay put and pretend to be sleeping.

  David climbs into bed, and I secretly hope he’ll put his arm around me and tell me he’s sorry. Sure, he’s said it before when it comes to all this craziness, but at least maybe we could talk rationally now that we’ve both calmed down.

  He stays on the other side, his back to me, and falls asleep.

  Ten

  The next morning, I’m at my desk wishing I hadn’t even bothered to come in. I’m miserable, emotional, and can’t focus on anything, which is why I’m basically hiding in my office. Geena is coming in this morning, and I’ve asked Terrence, one of my therapists, to work with her today. As much as I enjoy Kiran’s flawless beauty, I’m in no mood to be sociable, or professional, for that matter.

  I left before David woke this morning, so we didn’t speak. Carly would be in biology class right now, but I decide to text her to see how she is.

  Did David apologize? I ask.

  Yes, last night. We’re fine. But he’s not.

  I know.

  What are you gonna do?

  I have no idea.

  I set my phone on the desk and put my face in my hands when there’s a knock at the door.

  “Come in.”

  It’s Terrence. “I know you didn’t want to see clients today, but Mrs. Kapur and her son were wondering if they could speak with you for a minute.”

  Ah, crap. I’m sure I must look like hell. “Umm... sure.”

  A few seconds later Geena and Kiran are standing at my door.

  “Hello, Anna,” Geena says.

  “Hi, you two. Please, come sit down.” I motion to a couple of chairs.

  Oh my, Kiran looks delicious! He’s let a five o’clock shadow grow in and is wearing a pale green button-down shirt that makes his eyes pop, more than usual.

  “No, no,” she says. “We won’t keep you. I just wanted to invite you to my seventieth birthday party in two weeks. We would love to have you.”

  “That’s very kind of you to think of me.”

  “And feel free, of course, to bring a guest,” Kiran adds.

  I try to appear chipper. “Oh, I... Okay. Thank you.” No, no! I can hear the quiver in my voice.

  “Are you alright, sweetheart?” Geena asks.

  “I’m fine. Just not having a very good morning.” Damn it. I’m on the verge of tears just from her asking.

  Kiran scowls briefly and presses his lips together. “Mother and I were about to go next door for coffee before I take her home. Why don’t you join us?”

  “Thanks, but I don’t want to impose. And I’ve got paperwork to—”

  “Come with us.” Geena holds out her hand. “Maybe you just need to get out of this office for a bit.”

  Kiran offers an amused grin, as if there will be no refusing his mother.

  I look around the room, trying to come up with a valid reason for declining, and realize maybe it would be better if I got out of here to take my mind off things.

  “I guess I could disappear for a little bit.” I reach into my desk drawer to pull out my purse and rise to join them. When I grab my phone, the screen lights up with a call from David. I didn’t realize my ringer was off, and notice that somehow I missed a call from him earlier this morning. I’m certainly not going to answer while the two of them are here, so I reject the call.

  Once we’re inside Starbucks, Kiran insists on buying my coffee along with Geena’s, so he waits in line while we grab a table. As we settle in, I see two young women, probably in their twenties, waiting for their order at the other end of the counter. One of them takes a look at Kiran, then yanks on her friend’s arm to draw her attention. The other woman’s mouth literally falls open. “Stop staring!” the first one says, and they both giggle with embarrassment.

  Apparently, Geena sees the exchange and shakes her head. I turn to her and smile. “He must get that a lot,” I say with a laugh.

  She nods. “And he hasn’t let it go to his head yet. I keep waiting.”

  “How did he lose all the weight?”

  “The old-fashioned way. Just diet and exercise.” Briefly, she places her hand on mine. “He was so unhappy, Anna,” she adds in a hushed voice.

  Kiran returns with our drinks and takes a seat.

  “So, Anna,” Geena begins. “Why are you having such a bad Monday morning, dear? Work?”

  “Oh!” I give a quick shake of the head and wave my hand. “No... Just home stuff.” I lower my head and take a sip of my coffee.

  When I look up, again with those eyes, concentrated on mine. I’m beginning to suspect this attention is only in my mind, that it’s simply my own self-consciousness contriving some sort of mystery.

  “You’ll have to forgive my mother,” he says gently before giving her a s
ideways glance. “She can get too personal sometimes.”

  She shrugs unapologetically. “Well, why bother if we can’t be personal with one another? We’re all persons, so doesn’t that make everything personal?”

  He turns back to me with a silly expression; making a face and rolling his eyes, getting a chuckle out of me. Then he smiles as if he’s genuinely pleased to see me brighten up some.

  “Your party in two weeks. Will Mr. Kapur be coming home so he can be there?” I ask. “Or will he have to stay with his mother?”

  “She’s doing a little better now, so yes, he plans to fly back.”

  “That’s good. Do you have any brothers or sisters who will be coming?” I ask Kiran.

  “No siblings. It’s just me.”

  “Same here. We’re the ones others accuse of being spoiled rotten because we didn’t have to share our parents’ affections.”

  To my surprise, David enters Starbucks, looking as if he’s searching for someone, and that someone happens to be me. He spots me and gives a quick smile, then his gaze darts randomly around the place as he makes his way over.

  “Hey,” he breathes. “Teresa said I would find you here.” He quietly acknowledges Geena. However, when his eyes fall on Kiran, they widen in such an obvious way, I almost let out a snort of laughter despite my bad mood. Recalling the reception when Luke said he would go after Kiran if he had the chance, I can’t help but wonder if David is thinking the same thing.

  David’s attention shifts to me. “What?” he asks, a puzzled expression on his face. I don’t realize I’m smiling.

  “Nothing.” I force a more serious demeanor. “David, this is one of my clients, Geena, and her son, Kiran.”

  “Nice to meet you.” David shakes Geena’s hand, then Kiran’s. “That’s right,” he suddenly remembers. “You’re the one who went to school with Anna.”

  “Yes.”

  For a few moments, David looks back and forth between the two of us without saying anything and then produces a stiff grin.

  “So what’s up?” I ask, trying to seem as if we didn’t just have this huge disagreement the night before.