Year of the Orphan

by Daniel Findlay

  She licked her dry lips, coughed an tasted dust. Today she would go see Block, he was gunna be pissed that she hadnt showed yesterday but all day it was all she could do to not remember the Reckoner lookin into her eyes and her waitin for the blade across her windpipe that never come. More than passin strange. She looked across the round room at the water bottle. It was real, he’d left it with her. She had seen sumthin out there but she dint know what. She’d fled the Glows with Ghosts followin, she only hoped the Open Road was hidden well enough. The ship were her life. She’d covered her tracks real good, covered em the way she’d been taught and between Block, the boss an the old scavs there werent no better teachers. She was weak though, and the Spiral a long way. She was gunna have to ask sum favours and they was from people she already owed a few. Still, she needed to get back out there and get the ship, without it she wasnt gunna cover no ground and no hope she’d find her way back to them locked doors deep underground. No proper scavvin an no way to keep at the old fellas task neither. Today was the day, she was gettin up. Either Blockd help or she was gunna have to cipher to get what she wanted, she could feel it, taste the iron in her mouth. They werent takin no soft wagers either, that wasnt how they did these days. She looked at the little stump on her hand. She werent no kid no more and they made sure she knew it.

  10

  Before

  They travelled half a day out the System before the boss sat down. Dint talk on the walk but to point out the hills an animal tracks when they crossed their path. She int been outside in a long time an the space an the quiet of it soothed her though she’d never realised she were missin it. The clean air an all the rest. Sent her thinkin down ways she dint wanna go but she let her eyes stretch out to the horizon an just watched the mobs of roos in the distance an the scatter of scrub. For an old fella he covered ground good an by the time they made a day camp an the Orphan got the billy on she were feelin the walk. They sat a good long time sippin the brew fore the Old Man spoke an he dint take his wrap off an it were like he’d been waitin a long time for sumwun to talk to but that dint make no sense to her. Talked to fellas all day long but his voice wavered like he were startin a story he dint quite know the beginnin of.

  How long you been with me now?

  I dunno boss. Long time?

  You can drop the boss out here. Must be a coupla years at least. Hard keepin track of it all now. You know why I brought you out here?

  She held her tin tight, feelin the heat through the thin metal. Me letters?

  Part that. But more else. Got a job for ya. Bigger than a job, more a reason, unnerstand?

  No.

  Good girl. Truthll set ya free. You know why we are where we are?

  Here?

  The System, why it is where it is?

  I dunno.

  The plain answer is water. But I reckon you woulda figgered that on yer own. Around here theres moren enough deepdown water, clean they reckon, for us an for the others. Further out though, its dry for more miles than youll live to travel. Dint use to be that way. Used to be more like you, comin in from off the flats, but the water dried up or went bad an not so many any more. Those that went out lookin further dint come back. Nah the reason we’re here is fellas came here runnin an found water. Moren they could keep a hold of, soaks an rockholes for all. Not only that they found leavebehinds of them that came before. The roadmakers, the builders, the diggers. There was stuff out here, out on the plains, buried out in them Glows an plenny of other places. It were here an ready for this to grow up, for them fearful fools to build their fence an call it a System. Ya need to ken that good. The knowin of evrythin is the histery of that thing. You wanna be a healer, you learn the histery of healin, unnerstand? That water an that stuff from the longago, thats why we’re here.

  11

  Before

  I dunno what hes up to, but I aint expectin to see you again.

  He was silent as ever but if it were possible his hands was cacklin. The Watch stood silent behind him, eyes facin the sand, lookin like they was doin their job for once. Makin it look good for the show. She dint tell Karra it were her idea. That itd come to her in her sleep an hadnt left her mind till she voiced it quiet an scared to the boss. Said he’d been expectin it and asked did she wanna go see where she come from. She dint know where that was. Nuthin out there no more anyway, woulda been stripped soon as she were gone, werent even a dip in the ground no more she reckoned. Nah, she’d got the walkin in her bones though, in her feet themselves. The boss knew, she wanted to know where she were in the world and to do it alone. An here she were, outside the walls. She had a swag, sum water, a blade. Figgered on two nights outside, maybe longer dependin on what she ran into. Was supposed be in sight of the walls the whole time but that dint mean much with the type of jokers that was watchin it. Outside the circle you was outside the safety. Werent much that came close or this far inside the Boundaries but it were still the wild.

  Before ya go, anythin you wanna tell me? Where you an the boss been goin? Whatcher doin outside? Might not get another chance to come clean. Gunna be a cold night.

  He were near smilin. She aint never seen him look close.

  Boss just teachin me the letters. Makin tea.

  Karras face closed up. Fuck ya then ya dont wanna talk. You make it back youll be singin, mark me.

  Im speakin truth. Just me letters.

  Karra dint see her hands, were half turned, waitin for her to go. She dipped her head at him an then turned her back on the System, lookin East across the great flats and seein the haze of the hills on the horizon. She reckoned that might be the direction she’d been brought in from, but the trip across the sand long ago was gettin dim, like her memory of her mum an brother, faded with time an heat. She thought she mighta been in the System a long time but the Old Man seemed to have lost track. She were taller, she knew that much. Karra dint need to stoop to slap her no more. She looked back at the wall, the Watch were holdin up the small gate an Karra turned, his eyes meetin hers an then he was gone. He looked older, that were certain. Sposed she must too. The wall were higher, it were gettin bigger near evry day it seemed. The scrape of metal on metal as they slid the bolts in place an the heavy thump of the sleepers barrin it from the inside. She only noticed now she were locked out that the shadow of the wall were cast long on the sand. From the outside it looked higher an even though she could see easily into the towers she werent sure they could see her too well. The sky above was grey streaked with white, high up, catchin the late sun, an the temperature was fallin. She moved her swag so it sat high on her back an started trekkin away from the wall, the sounds of the System fadin quick. Half a mile out onto the sand and she knew she were already twice as far as she meant to go but her feet just kept carryin her an she knew if she dint stop em she’d never turn around. What was stoppin her? Nuthin much she sposed. She wanted to walk the circle though, that were why she were out here. Maybe after that she’d just keep walkin.

  Her courage left her when it started to get real dark. She crept back towards the wall, yard by yard until she could see the watchfires a couple of hundred spans distant. The noise of the place dint reach her though an that were the strangest of all. The shouts an whistles an cries of folk were just gone an there werent nuthin out on the sand makin any kinda noise at all. Her own footsteps had been loud in her ears as she started workin her way round the edge. Here an there were little piles of bones an drifts of rubbish. Sum peeps just threw their shit straight up an over an the wind took it where it pleased. The wall was battered in places, like things had crashed into the big sheets of iron, but as far as she could see it were whole. Sleepers stuck up here an there where they was buildin new towers and the watchfires burned like specks above the wire and glass that dotted the top. The wall were covered in tags too, scavs an passersby scratchin their names into it along with strange drawings. Tall creatures with big round faces, snakes an things thatd come outta the dark of sum histery. Big patches were covered in pitch. Pro
tection against rust, or fillin in holes. She knew the Watch walked bits of it on the daily, checkin up. Her eyes were good in the low light, took her a while to realise since it werent never true dark in the System. She could see the sand near as clear as though it were bright moonlight though there werent moren a sliver hangin in the sky. She knew enough to know it werent like that for Karra an the boss. The Watch neither by the look of it. She sat herself down on the cold sand and rolled out her swag, stickin the knife the boss had given her tip down in the soft ground. Her stomach had settled down an she pulled her coat around her tighter, wonderin just what she were doin out there.

  The howlin woke her in the cold hours before dawn. She reached for the knife, fumblin, knockin it over and then scrabblin out of her coat for it, layin chin to the sand like a snake on top of her bedroll. The noises were deep, almost a moan, an the hairs on her arms stood on end an in a blink her palms were slicked with sweat. They werent dingoes, or roos fightin or beasts in rut or anythin she’d heard before. They sounded fulla pain, like sumthin was wounded, an as she lay there listenin she caught her breath an took stock. At least a few kays from the door an noway anywun was openin it in a hurry, even if she got there. She looked across to her left at the wall. She’d bedded down in between watchfires anyway. She were worse than alone, she were alone an stupid. She closed her eyes a long moment an then opened them again, the remains of starlight seemin to soak in an then it were like day for her, the wall comin clear. She sniffed the air, catchin a drift of sumthin rank, sumthin dead or rotten an then came another of them awful moans, closer than before. She’d slept with her coat done up an left her canvas moccasins on, a small blessin at least. She switched the fightin knife to her left hand, tuckin coat into strides an started to snake across the sand on her belly, eyes swingin wun way an the other. Left to the wall an then right an round, sweepin out to the endless desert an then back in close.

  12

  Block looked at her. Finally here she were. Vexed an gritty. Her eyes, usually dark, were rimmed with ashy circles an she hadnt cleaned the charcoal proper off her teeth from when she’d been underground. The rest of her face was streaked with the greasepaint she wore in the dark an she looked like sumthin sumwun had dug up. He couldnt help the shiver across his shoulders. Skinny too, skinnier than usual. Still, she’d come off days on the sand an she were never proper with it when she come back to the light. Took her a while to get her head straight after the Glows. Had the stink of the Boundaries on her, the taint of the deep dark. His boys din wanna stand too close to her an he couldnt right blame them.

  Orphan.

  Block.

  He flicked his head, tellin his lads to leave em alone an when theyd dropped the curtain to his back room he motioned for her to sit down on the locker in front of his desk. She sat with a sway and let her breath out and he saw she were hurt in sum way, but not bad.

  Wheres yer ship?

  Yeah good to see ya too.

  She reached into her satchel an took out four shiny brass talls. .303 by the looks of em. He whistled low an held out his cupped hands and she carefully dropped them in wun by wun.

  Were they dry?

  As dust. Theyre good.

  Nuthin else?

  No guns, an no more of them neither.

  Never is. Books?

  Nuthin.

  Maps?

  Nuthin.

  He sat back in his chair, eyes still glued to the bullets, the lamplight makin em glow like gold.

  Salright. Ya done good gettin these. Wun day yer gunna find me a gun, I know it. Thesell come in handy I reckon. You eaten?

  Yeah, enough.

  He opened a drawer in his desk and put the bullets carefully out of sight. She caught a glimpse of red wax and brass, shotgun shells maybe, sum blades, razor wire. Blocks stash. Smaller than evrywun reckoned but that dint matter. Better they thought he was stacked to the teeth. She dint know why he cared about em so much. Not many took em as trade moren curiosities. He looked up at her as he closed the drawer.

  If ya don’t mind I’ll fix ya up later. Usual price, however ya want it. You gunna tell me what happened to the ship? And what you was doin out there?

  I was scavvin, Im a scav. Thats what I do.

  You went too far out dintcha. Nuthin out there but Ghosts. You run into em again?

  Maybe. But havent I found sum good stuff down them holes? Plenny of it you took off my hands.

  I never seen it.

  Dunno why ya pay for it then.

  Feel sorry for ya.

  It were their old game an theyd played it plenny of times. Dint change the prices none.

  What happened to yer head?

  She reached up and touched the lump fore she could stop herself. Howd he even seen it. Eyes front, back and side of his bludy head. She still wasnt feelin right but evry second the Wide Open Road stayed out there was another chance for sumwun or sumthin to come across it. She may as well tell him, werent nowun gunna believe it anyway.

  Reckoner.

  Block snorted.

  Yeah, best save them stories for the yungens. Im not worried if yer clumsy, no shame in it. Wheres the Open Road?

  Alright. Shes down a Spiral. Out Arkoola way, deep Glows. Further than I ever been. Stowed safe but I gotta go get her, an quick.

  She took a deep breath.

  They followed me up, I was down deeper than I ever went before an thats where I found them bullets. Ghosts was swarmin over it though, it were a big Spiral, bigger than I ever seen before an it went deeper too. Started gettin warm down there an you know, well you know how I get. I was near to findin sumthin big, mebbe sumthin real big.

  Blocks eyes were shinin an he were leanin over the desk, waitin for whatever it were.

  Got rumbled though an hadta get bluesky quick. They dint see me proper until I was nearlight, they dint know how deep Id gone. I ditched em in the dark an got out but I hadta leave her behind, stowed her down there. Too many scavs out there now, can’t leave her in the open no more. I can find her again though, no worries, just gotta get back out.

  How ya gunna do that?

  She looked at him, hope an fear fightin for space. Figgered you might run out the Taipan, send wun of the lads with me. Seven, eight days on the sand at most, providin all goes well.

  Block shook his head. Shes not in order. Needs repairs, a week to find what we need at least. Evrywun else is out on the sand, days out an not turnin around any time soon. Besides, whatta ya promisin me? What do ya reckons out there, what makes it worth me while?

  Ya got them talls I just gave ya for starters. There’s sumthin big though. Dunno what but I was seein shapes, feelin the colours. The Ghosts was strange too, they was organised, they wasnt wild like they sumtimes is. If you cant help, then I gotta wager for it in the Circle. Gotta get back out there quick, before they find her.

  Block sat back, his fingers steepled, chair creakin as he leaned. Now it was her turn to look at him, speculatin, wonderin where he were gunna fall. Finally he spoke.

  Its a big ask. Theyre gunna bet big for a trip like that. I know a few lads might take ya though. Fresh faces, dont know no better. Whatta ya wagerin?

  She held up her hands. Looked at the spot where her little finger used to be. Skin or scav. Whatever theyll take. Whatever you’ll give me.

  He looked across the desk at her a long time an she wondered just what he were thinkin. Eventually he let his breath out an stood up, his palms flat on the battered wood top. Better come with ya then.

  13

  Before

  She were a fucken idiot. An what were the boss thinkin? Karra sat in the dark of the study, puzzlin on what was goin on. Just to send her walkin out like that. Spent all this time raisin her up, all that time in the back rooms teachin her, showin her the books. Their bluddy walks. His face soured. Feedin her, waterin her. An now she were gone, just like that. A smirk spread across his face. The boss never explained much an there were plenny of weird shit that went on but he’d just throw
n his little Orphan to the dingoes. The wild dogs an dust knew what else out there was gunna tear her to pieces. He dint know why he gave a shit, had been wishin the like for a while hisself. Just dint make no sense though for the boss to send her. He’d thought the old fella was goin soft but maybe it were just soft in the head. He dint know but he dint like the look of it neither. Evry time the Orphan was in there with the Old Man he made her tell him what it was they was doin and she told him they was countin, they was tryna lern letters or else the boss was fillin her head with stories about the old times. Maybe the boss just wanted sumthin to raise up. Karra worked his butchered mouth and spat. Werent right. Made for a real strange look and peeps was always gunna chatter. He dipped the quill an started back on the ledger, the boss were gone into the Centre for sum trade, dint care to share it with Karra. He hawked up a reddish ball of phlegm, tinted by the everlovin dust, an spat it onto the floor.

  14

  Before

  She smelled it again before she saw it. The stink of carrion, brought back all kindsa bad blud. She caught movement out on the edges of her vision next an she lay dead still against the ground, wishin it would eat her up. Whatever it were, it were sumthin outta the West. Sumthin outta the deadlands, the old huntin grounds that vanished fellas like sandstorms. It were so black it seemed to drink light from all around it an she knew that even if fellas had been watchin from the wall this thing woulda been invisible. It were only her strange eyes that were lettin her see it an she were still figgerin out just how they worked. It slouched this way an that, swingin a mouth or head she couldnt make out against the blunt shape of it. She could hear it now too, testin the wind. It were blowin the wrong way for her, the beast probly already had a good gust of her, an she werent goin nowhere. Her hands was slippy but she held tight onto the knife, pullin herself up silent onto wun knee as the thing got closer, swayin its head, searchin for a scent. Without warnin it lifted its head up high an she could see its jaw, the height of the thing, at least as high as she were at the shoulder, maybe more. It raised up even higher an let out another wun of them terrible moans an from sumwhere way behind her she heard an answer. There were a pair of em, whatever it were. The wun in front of her sniffed the air again an she knew it had her scent, might be it dint know exactly where she were though yet. She tightened her grip on the greasy knife again an got ready to move.