Year of the Orphan

by Daniel Findlay

  Reckoner.

  Im here.

  We favour you Reckoner. Even still.

  He let his breath out slow an deliberate, not realisin he’d been holdin it.

  Them from the upabove have already been an gone. Theyve been sectionway an no turnin back. They will taint the soaks an scorch whats left. Only wun way to make it right.

  He saw himself from above an from below an he knew what was comin.

  Reckoner reckoner reckoner.

  They was chantin now an he felt the voice of his blud risin up in him. Givin him strength.

  All of them. All of them. Reckon. Reckon. Reckon.

  67

  She were sweatin hard when she hit the crest an like she hoped there was a breeze, but it went forgotten as she looked down on the plain in front of her. Three, four miles distant was two great open sheds sittin in the middle of nuthiness. The roof on wun of em had collapsed but they stood stark on the plain an next to them was a long low buildin near enough the same colour as the dust what surrounded it. Another mile further was what looked like a great red earth pyramid an out on the plain there was a small grey speck that weren’t nuthin natural. She kicked the brake on the Open Road an sat down on the deck, feelin the cold creep into her spite the sun an even with the gusts pushin past her it were quiet an she marvelled at the flatness of it, the anklehigh scrub an the colourless bleach of it all. Out either side of her she could see spikes set into the soil evry fifty paces or so an she walked out to look at the nearest. There were sum kinda sign fixed to it with what looked like a faded picture of a roo on it an sandblasted bits of letters she couldnt make out. The same thing evry fifty yards stretched off into the distance. Dint make no sense to her an she walked back to the ship an sat back on the spars. She stayed put a while, just watchin the plain below, not wantin to go closer but the changin wind made a choice for her an she skated the ship down the hill until she was close enough to the sheds an then she tied the ship off an gathered her things about her an started in on em. The sheds was just wide open an she could see the bones of em, sum rusted through an others collapsed with time, an in another life she might canvassed the ground for bolts an the like but not now. Whatever their secrets they werent givin up nunofem an their reason for bein was lost to more years than she reckoned she knew. Through their open walls she looked at the strange low buildin that musta been built later but not as good. It were pitted by a thousand dust storms an the roof looked like it were collapsed in sum places, no doubt rainin sand an dust inta the inside. Sumwun out here had saw fit to remember Maralinga an there were still sum kinda buildin out here standin to mark the place. Sum kinda lesson from the Old Woman nigglin in the back of her head an makin her pull up her scarf an wrap her mouth and pull her field glasses down over her eyes. The place looked like sumthin she mighta seen around the System but it were even more abandoned than the worst places in there an it carried sum kinda evil feelin with it she could taste on the back of her tongue, even through the mask. As she come closer she could see the door had fallen off a long time ago an it lay on the ground. Inside it looked mostly dark an her brighteyes dint seem to be workin too good while she stood on the edge of it so she screwed up the fear what were inside her an stepped across an into the hot dark buildin. It took a sec but her eyes sorted emselves out an she were in a long room filled with so much dust it looked like smoke in the air. Evry time a storm come it musta gone through the place. Little cases standin up evry few spans, drifts of red dirt against em an on the walls was sum kinda paintins an pictures what were stuck up high sumhow. She’d seen books with pictures before but these were bigger an when she looked close she could make out yellowed shapes an they looked like people. She walked slow an careful down the length of the room, tryin not to kick too much dust into the air an she come to a stop in front of a picture that were in better nick than the others, sum kinda glass in front of it, frosted with cracks but good enough to look through. The picture was showin all kindsa fellas, jus lookin back at her from the wall. A lot of em had real sad eyes an sum of em had the milk eyes that sum of the old fellas back at the System had. She could tell sum of em was real sick an there was other fellas with em all wearin the same kinda clothes. She stood lookin at it a long time but it werent givin up none of its secrets. The picture next to it had what looked like words across the bottom but the air an storms an heat over the years hadnt been real kind to the paper an the letters was lost. She worked her way round, lookin in all the cases an where theyd been preserved there was pictures of fire an kids an pictures of the dust an pictures of hulks, an people was standin around wun of em an it looked like itd caught fire real good, it were black an parched an burned. There was pictures of folk that had that look like they was real important an there was pictures of peeps what looked like they dint think they was no better than dust. The Orphan knew them looks real good. She seen em her whole life. Dint make no sense though, she knew she was lookin at them old times the Old Woman was always bangin on about. Them perfect old times what she liked to dream about even when she was tellin the Orphan about all the bad things what got done. An here was sum moments what had survived and them old times looked a lot less than perfect. She made her way deeper inta the shed, tryna unnerstand the pictures she was seein but more often gettin stuck on what was goin on. Too much time had passed for her to figger out what exactly was happenin but over an over again she saw faces what looked terrible familiar. She thought them faces was part of her own time but it looked like they wasnt. Towards the back she stood over a wide case with the glass lid still in place an inside she saw sumthin familiar. It were another map of Maralinga but this wun were smaller an written on it was a spot readin you are here, next to them same words what were on the sign outside, Maralinga Memorial Site. Well, that were where she was. She circled the case, readin all the words she could find. There were points sayin blast site, safety area, observation post, vehicle test, unused test site, all kindsa words she hadta sound out an take her time gettin to know. She saw it upside down from the other side of the case an hadta walk slow around, the words what was real familiar again, words what she’d heard an maybe seen in sum of the Old Womans papers. It read Taranaki Waste Material Burial Pit. She unnerstood enough of that to know. Here were the real thing, the thing she come to find. It dint look like no more than a few miles away from where she were standin right now an she felt the weight again, the same wun what had dropped on her when she were down the Glows an seen the other map for the first time. She stood over the case, memorisin the landmarks an the land itself before she took her eyes away an looked at the back of the room. She were close to the end of the cases an she dint see nuthin important in the other wuns but at the back of the room near where the roof had caved in there were a cloth what run across the ceilin on sum kinda runner an it were drawn across, sealin off the end bit. She crossed the room an tugged gentle on the cloth. The runner musta been held together by pure rust, came crashin off the roof an onto the floor, raisin up such a thick cloud of dust that if she hadnt been wearin her wrap she mighta coughed herself to death. She jumped back, waitin for the dust to settle an she saw a fella loomin up at her out the back of the room an she went for her blade as fast as she ever had. Droppin into a crouch she held the bayonet out strong an steady but the fella din move, just stood there like a statue. She took another look through the dust that was still filterin down an she realised there werent no rise an fall, the fella werent a fella at all. It were a strange lookin thing standin up inside a glass case that had sumhow lived through whatever had happened to the buildin. She walked closer, not afraid anymore but still wary of the strangelookin thing. It were a pale yellow colour an sum kind of plastic or leather an it were in the shape of a person. Dint have a mark on it, were like itd never been touched, come fresh out the past without no blight on it. There were sum kinda sign on the bottom of the case etched in stained metal. She read it slow. Radiation Protection Suit Mk IV. She dint know what all that meant but she unnerstood protecti
on real good. Whatever that thing in the case were it were sum kinda protection against whatever were out here. She stood in the filterin dust for a long time lookin at it. Did she trust it? Why else were it here. She felt the Old Woman close to her an she stepped back a pace reversin her grip on the bayonet in her hand an swingin it at the glass, raisin a hand to shield her face.

  68

  Block dint have much on him but a hook blade an a long knife an he dint fancy his chances real good against twenny or more of Karras blokes. It were typical o that snake to have all them fellas out there an Gus who was clear enough his man but the bald bastard himself werent nowhere to be seen. The fire were ragin fierce through the buildin now an Block could tell it were reachin all his precious leaves, all the papers an books he’d collected from the old times, all the voices of the dead was bein lost to the flames. He started movin closer, huggin the shadows like he were a Ghost hisself an afraid o the light. He had a cold killin anger on him now an there werent no comin back from this without sum blud spilled. Werent nun of Karra’s lads watchin their backs save for the odd turn to banter with each other. Block were creepin past summa the bodies of his yungens an as he moved past em he caught the glassy reflection of light outta their flat eyes an he made his heart hard against the fear an kept slidin an slippin through the dark like he dint never know no diffrent. All them years of playin long cons an makin careful moves was fallin off him as he got closer an all he were thinkin about was bein a littlun again an seein that orphan goin up for sale down at the auction block. He’d been sold hisself down there once, picked up the name, all theyd called him for the first ten years of his life. Afore he’d up an gone an kept it to spite em. He were patient but sumtimes it dint pay to be patient. Sumtimes it paid to carry hate a long time an use it to keep ya goin an sumtimes come a time that ya had to let it out. The closer he was gettin to Karras lads the more he was feelin like the old, old Block an when he were ten spans from Gus an still in the shadows of the firelight he caught the whiff of grog on em an he knew they was cowards what couldnt do their wet work dry an that the odds was in his favour all of a sudden. He were about to draw the long knife and the hook blade an drop all cover when he heard a crack like a whip but far off an felt sumthin wasp past his head. He stopped in the shadows, both knives out an watched as the blokes in front of him looked around, confused. The came another whipcrack, and another, and another, an Block knew what was happenin, even if Karras lads dint. The rounds he’d saved up careful for moren ten years was cookin off an werent no tellin where they was goin. Block dropped to his stomach quick an the sound of bullets goin off turned into a fast tattoo an he heard the bigger thump of shotgun shells an .303 rounds punchin through the corrugated iron an wood of the building. Wun of Karras lads caught wun in the neck an dropped screamin an the others all had blade out, spinnin round, not knowin what was happenin. The buzzin got louder an bits of hot metal was ricochetin off tin an steel an out in the middle of the street the boys was finally twiggin that sumthin werent right an a few of em had dropped belly to the sand and had their hands over their ears. Gus werent so quick an wun slashed across his thigh an even in the firelight Block could see itd clipped sumthin serious an bright red blud bubbled up through his fingers as he dropped, cryin out to the dust. The noise an shoutin of the lads was startin to die down, just the odd pop of a .22 still fizzin around inside an Block reckoned his chances werent gunna get no better. He stood up an stepped clean outta the shadows, crossin the dusty street quick an kicked Gus’s legs round so he were lookin straight at him. Before he could even cry out again, Blockd pushed the long knife straight between his ribs, puttin his weight on the hilt and leanin in so he was lookin right at him. Block spat in his face as his eyes opened up wide in horror an then dragged the hook blade across his throat to be sure of it. It hadnt taken moren two seconds an Karras fellas was still layin in the dust, a few caught by bullets but most just stunned, jaws dropped an knives stuck in their belts. Blockd been expectin sum kinda sharp fight on his hands but they was just lookin at him like he were a Ghost. He got a few steps back outta the group of em, farther than he reckoned he woulda an then Block were runnin, runnin hard through them back alleys with both blades still dark an drawn.

  69

  Karra were ragin fit to murder sumwun. To murder more sumwuns than he had already. Them fucken fools he’d sent to take care of Blocks boys had only managed to get a few of em which meant sumwhere out there was a mess of yungens fixin to spill his blud all over the System. An to top it all off them fucken idiots lit the place up an itd near enough exploded. What the fuckd the Block been keepin in there? Killed four of his blokes an put another two off their feet wounded. Wun was already infected an Karra knew there werent nuthin he could do for him but ease the way out. Add them fools to the hundred sick from out near the pits an he’d had cando men askin at his door two days straight what were wrong with em an he aint had much to tell em cept piss off. Seemed like the whole place was rottin alive an Karra dint have no answers. Werent gunna keep em at bay long. Them stupid fucken ladsd let Gus, the only wun what knew all of em by sight, get kilt in the street. Right in the middle of em. By none other than the Block hisself who were supposed to be dead an buried out on the sand. It were a fucken disaster, thats what it was. That fucken idiot Gusd deserved to get it. Sellin Block out an then fucken up so bad that nearly all of emd got away. Bout the only consolation was that Blocks place was nuthin but cinders but Karra knew it werent a place he’d got to be wary of, it were the yungens what had lived there an right now they was probly plottin away on how best to open him up. He were reminded of the old fellas sayin. Yeah it were less than fucken ideal alright. He were tempted to open up the grog but he needed all his wits about him right now he reckoned. He banged on his desk an a lad come in standin in front of his desk. Karra looked hard at him, watchin him shift his weight from foot to foot an the shifty eyes an broken teeth.

  Where are the rest of your fellas?

  The fella spoke with a crack in his voice, like he was expectin trouble.

  Sum of em laid up, sum outside waitin on what to do next. Russ aint gunna make it, got the blud poison. Could take his leg off but he aint survivin either way.

  He know it?

  He knows.

  Thats on you.

  I unnerstand boss.

  Do ya? You was supposed to be out there yaself last night. Supposed to be lookin after my lads an where was ya? Smashed on clear wine an spewin in yer boots. I should have ya staked out already but I got wun chance for ya to make it right.

  I will boss.

  Good. First thing ya gunna do is get out there on them hooks an bring me Block, or his head, by mornin.

  70

  It were bluddy heavy an she were glad she werent carryin it far. She turned again to make sure it werent slidin off the Wide Open Road. She were in harness again an towin the ship with the yellow suit folded up as best she could and stowed loose on the deck. It were real stiff an when she looked at it close it had sum kinda metal woven through it real thin an layers an layers of sum clear stuff she aint never seen before. Whatever it were, it were strong. All them faded pictures showed the years on em but the suit dint look like itd been sittin in that glass case since the old times. She werent sure if she should already be wearin it but it were so hot she figgered it were best to put it on when she reached where she were goin an not before, if she wanted to make it there at all. Werent no towin the ship wearin that bluddy thing, that were certain. She turned an looked back up at the sheds on the hill. She’d half expected em to be gone but they was still there, sky clear through em.

  The track she were on was gettin close to the strange grey stone out in the middle of the rocky field but the big flat red buildin she’d seen from up on the hill was still a ways off. That were where she was headed. The ground either side of the track was uneven an gettin weird around her an she knew she werent gunna be able to take the ship out with her to get a closer look. She anchored it an took a long
, still look at the thing a hundred yards in front of her. Shaped kinda like a road marker but squat an heavy. The ground were burned like she’d seen before on the journey in but there was big arcs of what looked like glass glitterin in the dust an she could see when she caught the right light that they formed great rings reachin out an visible in places fore they disappeared. They was covered in places with dust an sand but she could see the curves well enough on either side to figger they must reach all around an make a great circle sumhow an in the middle was her marker. She hadta be careful on the ground, it were loose an not proper settled an each step it tried to twist her up. She got to the marker it an crouched down, seein the worn writin on the side of it. Wun side were near all gone, musta faced the wind for a coupla hundred years but the other side were still there an she read the words careful, tracin her fingers.

  TEST SITE TARANAKI

  A BRITISH ATOMIC

  WEAPON WAS TEST

  EXPLODED HERE ON

  9 OCT 1957

  She looked again at the other side an the near invisible sign etched into the concrete, of the circle broken into threes again. Most of them words meant nuthin to her but she knew. This were the spot. This were the spot where wun of them beasts was let out into the world without care for them that lived here or them that was comin after. She stood back up an looked around her an it came clear she was standin in a dip. Shallowlike, near hidden but sum great gouge had been taken from the earth an filled in an that were why the ground were loose an broken because it werent the ground that were meant to be here an she stood in the heart of a scar now with this thing to mark its place. She looked back at the Open Road an then off in the distance, feelin a pattern to the place an a hurtin in her heart. All them uncounted years she knew to have passed. The words an numbers she dint have no knowin of but the ground couldnt lie to her. Couldnt lie to nowun.