Ben & Matilda- Infinite Promise

by Tania De Melo

  “I didn’t walk away from anything, Ati. You accused me of cheating when I wasn’t.”

  “You may have well been. Work lunches, late nights, text messages at all hours of the night...all with the same woman.”

  I let out a huff in frustration. “Those were all work-related. You knew that.”

  “Maybe on your end, but she wanted more. And the moment things ended with us, she got what she wanted because you walked right into her arms.” Her anger is waning, but it’s being replaced with hurt. Her eyes glisten with unshed tears puddled in her lids.

  “Is that what you thought? That I just moved on?”

  “Didn’t you, Ben?”

  I pull out the chair across from her. “I was hurting, Ati. I just lost the one thing that meant the most to me in the world, and I was hurting. Dammit, I loved you. I didn’t want to end things, but it was getting to be too much. I was holding you back from living life, and my head was reeling trying to figure out a way to balance it all out. In the end, all I saw was us arguing all the time, and that would have ended worse. She was there when I needed someone to talk to.”

  Ati turns to me, the tears now freely falling. “But did you really love me?”

  I look into her eyes. “God, Ati—I don’t know that I ever stopped.”

  Her breathing becomes trembled. “I can’t do this with you again. I’m sorry.” She stands walking out, the front door shutting moments later.

  “Hey.”

  I look up, and Alex is standing in the doorway to the dining room.

  “Alex, I’m sor—”

  “Don’t apologize. I’m not mad. I had a feeling there was more to this thing with you and her, and that’s why I said we should be friends for now. Ben, your feelings toward her have been written all over your face from the beginning. Even more now than before. Like your father said, you may end up together or not. But either way, from what I see, the love you two have would be a shame to not fight for. Ben, I thought I had loved my ex, but when I see the way the two of you, after eight years of being apart, still look at each other. Like the world starts and ends with you two. That’s what love really is. True love is infinite...a promise to be a part of that one person’s soul until the end of time.”

  She’s right; I know, without a doubt, the way I feel for Ati, I could never feel for another woman. But can we make it work with our past still very much a wound that has not healed? I don’t know—but the one thing I do know is that I have to try.

  Chapter Eleven

  -Matilda-

  The car ride back to Gary from my sisters was quiet with the conversation I had with Ben still playing in my head.

  “Are you going to crash here?” I look to Quinn, his eyes full of understanding.

  “I don’t know. I could really use some time to myself.”

  He lets out a breath. “Ati, stay at my place. I will actually be gone most of the night; if I even come home. You’ll have the place to yourself.”

  I think for a moment. It’s not like I really have anywhere else to go to in town, and going back to my sisters isn’t an option. I just couldn’t deal with that right now. “Okay. That would be great. Thank you.”

  We pull into the parking lot and make our way to his apartment. Once inside, Quinn turns to me. “Ati, I just want to say I’m sorry. I know my poking wasn’t really helping.”

  “Actually, about that.” I take a breath. “Quinn, I don’t think it’s a good idea that I move in. I mean the place is great, and you’re great. I just think moving in may give you the wrong idea about...you know...our future relationship.”

  He breaks into a roaring fit of laughter.

  “What’s so funny?”

  He walks over, placing a hand on each side of my face and peers into my eyes. “You are beyond beautiful when you are trying to be non-confrontational. Ati, as much as I think you are possibly one of the most breathtakingly gorgeous, intelligent, good-hearted women I have ever met, you’re just not my type.”

  Brow’s pinched, I take a step back, giving us some distance. “What do you mean? I’m not trying to toot my own horn here, but I’m pretty much every guy's type.”

  Quinn lets out another laugh. “Oh please, toot away.”

  “Seriously. Why am I not your type?”

  He walks to the couch and throws himself down. “You're not built to my liking.”

  Now I’m getting angry. “Wow, okay. What the hell does that mean?” Arms now stretched out, and behind his back, he doesn’t answer just looks me dead in the eye giving a suggestive wiggle.

  No way! “You’re gay?”

  “And we have a winner, folks,” Quinn mocks.

  “Like for real? Are you sure?”

  “Pretty sure, but feel free to ask my little friend here if you need more confirmation,” he responds with a chuckle as he points to his lower region.

  “Oh my, God.”

  “You asked.”

  “Wow. Okay, I would never have guessed,” I reply.

  “I get that from most people.”

  I move toward the other side of the couch. “But wait. What was that whole thing at brunch?”

  Quinn sits up, so we are now facing each other. “To get a rise out of your little boy toy.”

  “He’s not my boy toy.”

  “Yeah, okay. Well, someone may want to tell him that because that man is in l-o-v-e with you.”

  I lay back against the couch. “He said he thinks he never stopped loving me.”

  Quinn pushes himself closer to me, taking my hand in his. “I heard...we all did. The open concept of that house makes for great acoustics.”

  “Fantastic.” I drop my head back, closing my eyes, “My sister is going to be all over me.”

  “So, what are you going to do about it?”

  I tilt my head to look at him. “Do about what?”

  He rolls his eyes. “You know what. Don’t try and avoid it, At. The look I saw on Ben’s eyes when he looked at you, I saw in yours when you looked at him. Shit, even when you say his name, it’s like your soul lights up. You love him, and you need to act on it. Believe me, you will never be able to find that fire that you two have for one another again. That's once in a lifetime kind of shit.”

  “You’re so poetic.”

  He shrugs. “I make a good point, and you know it.” Quinn stands, pulling me with him. “I’ve got to head out, but I just want to make sure this thing with you not wanting to move in is forgotten.”

  “Yeah, it’s forgotten. Although, now I’m wondering if I need to worry about any future boyfriends I bring around,” I say with a snicker.

  “I understand your concern; I mean, you were willing to turn down living in this awesome apartment in fear you wouldn’t be able to resist me. But rest assured, I will not sway any of your suitors to the wild side. I already have all the man I need.”

  Now curious, I ask, “Would this be where you are headed to now?”

  “Wouldn’t you like to know.” He taps the tip of my nose with his finger, then looks in my eyes. “Call him, and actually figure out whatever it is that is holding the two of you back from being together.”

  “He has a girlfriend, Quinn.”

  He lets out a chuckle. “She’s not his girlfriend, and if she was, after this morning, she’s not anymore.” He gives me a smile and continues, “They’re just friends, At. Call him.” He steps away and heads to the door. “Make yourself at home. The fridge is stocked, and your bathroom has fresh towels. Explore your new place, just stay out of the red room.”

  “You have a red room,” I question, eyes wide.

  Quinn lets out another of his famous belly-filled laughs. “No, but tell me that wouldn’t be the shit. Think of the unspeakable things we could do in there.”

  “You’re an ass,” I let out with a chuckle.

  “Maybe, but I’ve got you thinking about it.”

  “Leave,” I say, not able to hold back my laughter.

  He turns back to the door. “Don�
��t wait up, doll.”

  Once Quinn leaves, I head to the kitchen peeking through the cupboards and fridge. He wasn’t joking, it’s all fully stocked. I make a quick mental note of a couple of things I would like to pick up, then make a cup of tea and head to my room. Laying on the bed, I grab my cell and shoot Gwen a text.

  “Hey, hopefully, I didn’t ruin brunch. I just wanted to let you know that I’m at Quinn’s. I’ve decided to move in with him. I’ll explain more later. But I’ll be around sometime through the week to pick up my things.”

  Knowing her cell is never far from her, I wait for a response, and sure enough, I don’t wait long.

  “Okay. I’m going to miss you around here. Let me know if you would like me to pack a bag with some of your things. Liam can drop it off tomorrow sometime.”

  “That would be great. Love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  With my cell still in hand, I debate whether or not to send Ben a message. What would I say? ‘Hey, sorry about earlier, but you deserved it.’ Yeah, probably not a great opener.

  Deciding to just bite the bullet, I type out what I feel is best at this moment. “I want to say sorry for my part on how this morning went down. There are a lot of things that were said. Some held truth, but some didn’t. I want to clear the air between us and was hoping you would maybe like to meet up for coffee sometime? Let me know. - Ati.”

  I set my phone to the side and watch the minutes, then hours go by waiting for some sort of reply, but nothing. Not even when I wake in the morning. The only text I have is one from Gwen telling me Liam will be by with my things this morning. I reply, giving her the address, then throw my phone on the bed beside me and lay back down.

  No reply at all…really? Not even a ‘No way,’ or a ‘Lose my number.’ I give up. I’m done. I refuse to waste another second of my precious time on Ben Adair.

  With a renewed sense of self and a determination to move on with the one last part of my life that has been neglected, I head to the en suite to get ready for my day. When I close the door behind me, there’s a robe neatly hanging on the back with a note attached.

  ‘It’s not very girly, but it’s all I had laying around with short notice. If you’d prefer something else, I have boxers and a t-shirt in the top right drawer of my dresser; feel free to grab them. See you later, roomie. - Quinn’

  I smile at his hospitality. He really does think of everything.

  ***

  I jump out of the shower just in time to hear the house phone ring. Should I answer it? No. There isn’t anyone that would be calling me here, so it would be for Quinn, and I don’t want to overstep. The ringing stops then starts right back up. Maybe I should answer, it could be an emergency. I walk out of my room, wrapped comfortably in Quinn’s robe, and head to the living room. When I reach the side table, I lift the receiver to my ear. “Hello.”

  “Dr. Batin, there is a Gwen Adair here to see you. Shall I send her up?”

  “Yes, please. Thank you.”

  “Of course. She’ll be right up.”

  I tighten my robe and head to the door to wait for my sister. Moments later, a soft tap

  sounds. I open the door and greet Gwen with a huge smile. “Welcome to my humble abode.”

  She steps inside, taking it all in. “Humble my ass; look at this place. Does Quinn have an extra room? I may just leave Liam at home with the kids and move in here. Jasper is even quite impressive.”

  “Jasper?” I ask, not sure if it’s a person or someone’s pet she met along the way.

  She makes her way in further taking in her surroundings. “He’s the attendant at the main entrance. An interesting fellow.”

  “Gwen, you were down there for all of two seconds.”

  She offers a slight grin. “Did I mention he’s also quite chatty.” She turns to me. “So, are you going to give me a tour of the place?”

  With Jasper forgotten, a grin spreads across my face. “Gwen, you are not going to believe it. I couldn’t have dreamt up a better place. My bedroom is huge. The bathroom has a bidet, and my walk-in closet is big enough to have a dance party in. I’m not joking.”

  “Well, what are you waiting for, woman? Lead the way.”

  We walk through the rest of the apartment, just quickly peeking at the living room and kitchen as we make our way to my bedroom. When we step inside, Gwen’s eyes almost fall out of her head.

  “Holy crap. You weren’t kidding. Never mind another bedroom, I can just bunk with you,” she lets out excitedly.

  “Well, although I do like my own room. I am willing to have the occasional sister sleepover. Maybe sooner than later. I may need your help organizing this closet just right.” I open the door to the walk-in, and Gwen’s jaw drops.

  “You. Have. Got. To. Be. Kidding me. This is ridiculous. I should have packed you a bigger overnight bag.”

  “Oh, yeah. Where is it? I didn’t see you bring anything in,” I mention.

  Gwen glances over to me, a look of guilt creeping on her face. “Well, you see. The bag was far too heavy for me to bring up.”

  “Oh, no, that’s okay. I can go and grab it. Just let me throw some clothes on,” I say.

  Another guilt-filled look appears. “Actually, Ben is in the car waiting for me to give him the okay?”

  “Say what?”

  “I mentioned that I was going to get Liam to come up and bring you some stuff, and he asked if he would be able to. I said sure, but I wasn’t sure how that would go down with you seeing as how brunch turned out. So, I came as well to test the waters first.”

  I shake my head in confusion. “Wait, he offered?” Gwen nods, and I fill her in about the text I sent. “Why didn’t he reply back?”

  “No clue. But if you’re looking for answers, he’s downstairs, and if I’m not mistaken, he really wants to talk.”

  I take a deep breath. “Okay. Call him up.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “No. But we need this. Call him.”

  Gwen pulls out her phone, and I use the mainline to call Gwen’s new friend Jasper to let him know that he can let Ben up. Thankfully, there is a button on the phone clearly labeled, ‘front desk.’

  It doesn’t take Ben but moments to make his way up, a soft rap at the door indicating his arrival.

  “Okay, well, that’s my cue to make like Houdini and disappear,” Gwen says.

  “Houdini was an escape artist,” I correct smugly.

  “Escape, disappear. Apples, Oranges. All the same to me. Either way, there is no way I’m staying around for all the awkwardness that is about to go down.”

  “What are you going to do, wait in the car?”

  Gwen gives me a smile. “Nope. I think Jasper may be ready for a little break. He was just starting to tell me about his new little lady friend he met at a singles mixer. It was just about to get juicy.”

  “You need more excitement in your life,” I throw out.

  She shrugs. “Unlikely. I have had enough excitement to last me a few lifetimes over. I quite enjoy living vicariously through others. All the fun without having to get dressed up and fork out a bunch of money.”

  Gwen walks over, opening the door, and behind it stands Ben. Looking ever so dapper in a fitted grey suit and white collared shirt, he’s left his top button open with no tie. He never liked ties. I guess that hasn’t changed.

  “Okay, well, you two play nice. I don’t want to have to call in the reinforcements,” Gwen jokes.

  Ben looks to her. “That would be hard seeing as how they’re all busy dealing with the storm.”

  “Storm?” Gwen questions.

  “Have you two not looked out the window? Some freak storm just hit, and it’s bad. They sent out an extreme weather warning. I was actually just about to head in when you called, Gwen.”

  I turn to the window. The skies are an ominous grey, but other than that, it looks relatively calm. “It doesn’t look that bad.”

  “It wouldn’t from up here, but go over to
the window and look down,” Ben says.

  I do as he suggests, and when I look down, all I see is water. “Holy crap!”

  Ben and Gwen make their way over, each taking their place on either side of me.

  “Wow, it’s really escalated just in the time it took me to get up here. Those cars are buried in water,” Ben utters, his body going tense.

  Gwen lets out a slight gasp. “What if there are people out there?”

  Her question prompts my next thought. “I need to call the hospital,” I head to the bedroom and grab my cell, quickly dialing.

  “Gary Hospital.”

  “Genevieve, it’s Ati.”

  “Cheri, I know why you are calling, and I’m telling you, don’t even think about it. Team two is going to work a double and over since they can’t leave anyway. If you’re home, stay there. The heavens have opened their flood gates and decided today was the day for cleansing.”

  I let out a sigh knowing the chaos that has likely erupted in the ER. “Are you sure? You’re probably getting hit and could use the extra hands.”

  “You won’t be able to help if you end up getting yourself killed, Cheri. Stay home, and don’t go outdoors. They put out those warnings for a reason. When things have cleared up, and the warnings are lifted, then come in. Do you—,”

  The call drops. “What the?” I walk into the living room where I had left Gwen and Ben. “My call just dropped.”

  “Cell towers must have got hit. It’s really bad out there, and getting worse by the minute,” Ben replies.

  “I need to get to the hospital.”

  Ben moves toward me, stopping only a foot away. “You’re not going anywhere.”

  “Yes, I am. If it’s that bad, the hospital is going to be short-handed with people coming in with injuries. I have to go,” I argue back.

  “Ati, no. I’m not going to let you go out in this. You could get seriously hurt, or worse. You’re staying here,” Ben orders.

  Just as I am about to snap back, Gwen steps in. “Guys, we have bigger problems.” Ben and I turn to look at her. She is standing there looking down to her feet, then looks up to us with a pale white face. “I think my water just broke.”