“Seriously, Ati. Where soul mates. Bosom buddies. Pinky and the Brain. Sylvester and Tweety.”
I look to him, unable to conceal the roll of my eyes, or rather, not really caring if I do. “We are not soulmates. Definitely not bosom buddies. You, yourself, are both pinky and the Brain. However, you are getting closer with Sylvester and Tweety.”
“Because of their undeniable friendship?” He questions with another beaming smile.
I look to him with a pinched brow. “I grew up in Brazil, and even I know Sylvester and Tweety were not friends. More like Sylvester was a stubborn-ass thorn in Tweety’s side.”
Brock nodded confidently. “That’s right. Keeping Tweety on his toes. Teaching him that life can get tough, but Sylvester would always be there to keep him prepared.”
Thankfully, we reach the lobby. As the doors slide open, I step out quickly, letting out a sigh of relief. Then I realize, there’s still another two hours with Brock confined in a small car.
“Hold up, bestie. Wait for me,” he calls out.
Fan-fricken-tastic!
***
I swear he purposely drove slower so he could try and break me. The usual two-hour car ride seemed as if it was never going to end. When we pull into Bane and Thea’s for the annual Adair Family barbeque, Brock parks the car, but before I can get out, he reaches for my arm.
“Ati, hold up.”
I sit back in the passenger seat, turning back to Brock. “Yes?”
“Look, I know I come off as arrogant, and you may think that this whole conversational banter we’ve been having since we left the apartment is all a big joke. But I’m serious. Ati, that’s how I see you.”
What the—I let out a hesitant breath, “Brock, I’m with Ben.”
He looks to me with a pinched brow, then as if a lightbulb turns on, his expression turns from pensive to aware. “Ati, soulmates don’t need to be intimate. A lot of times, the bond is something else. Mother/daughter. Sisters or brothers. And sometimes, it’s best friends.” He pauses a moment letting out a sigh, and that’s when I realize he’s serious, then he continues. “Look, I don’t know, but lately, with everything in my life being so hectic, I sometimes feel like I’m losing ground. When I call you, you always know how to make things better.”
“And that makes us soulmates?”
Brock turns in his seat. “I want you to be honest here. When there’s a problem that you can’t figure out or something is bothering you emotionally, how often is it me, you call first rather than your sister or Thea and Grace?”
I look ahead—he’s right. Over these past years, Brock has always been the person I reach out to. Either when something has been bothering me, or if I just needed some sound advice, it’s been him. Odd, I know, but if you put aside his playful arrogance, he’s actually a good guy. When I came back to Emerson, and Ben was back in my life; that was the only time in eight years that I can remember not reaching out to Brock. I think it’s because I know if he was to tell me to forget Ben for now, that I needed to focus solely on my work...I would have. He knows where my heads at, even better than Gwen, Thea, or Grace. Sometimes, better than me. “I—”
He cuts me off before I finish. “Look, the only reason I’m telling you this is because, well, lately, it seems like you’ve been shutting me out.”
“Brock, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. It’s just, things have been different since I’ve come back home.”
“I know, and I get it. When Thea married Bane, sure we stayed good friends, and Bane eventually forgave me for everything that happened. Hell, he and I even became good friends as well, but they had their own life to live with each other. Grace and Ewan were the same. With you, it’s honestly been a little harder to readjust to. When I think of us. When I think of you moving on with Ben, I’m happy for you. Ecstatic. But, at the same time, lately, I feel like I’m losing a big part of my life. Ati, I’m losing someone I knew I could drive absolutely crazy, but in the end, when it came down to it, I knew I could always turn to you when I needed to—it feels like I’m losing the one person I could count on.” He lets out a breath, shaking his head. “Never mind, I'm just being overly sentimental. Let’s get heading out back.”
It’s me now that reaches for him, holding him back. “You’re right. You have been the one I have turned to as well, but I guess past events have stopped me from thinking of us in a different light.”
“What past events?”
Shooting him a dead stare, I take a moment, but then eventually, that lightbulb shines bright once more. “Oh...Yeah, I see what you’re saying. Crap, that was so long ago, I honestly completely forgot about it.”
“Gee, thanks.”
Brock lets out a laugh. “You know what I mean. After that night, for me, I knew I could never have you completely. You always would love Ben, and oddly enough, I was okay with that. I somehow knew what we had was different—special. I guess I believed you saw it too.”
“Soulmates? Bosom buddies? Pinky and the Brain?”
Brock snickers. “Yeah, I guess now that I hear it out loud from you, it sounds dumb.”
I take hold of his hand. “No, it doesn't. And you’re right, we are. I just never realized that’s what it was. Honestly, Brock, before I moved to Emerson ten years ago, I never really knew what it was like to have a family, let alone close friends that treated me like one and opened their homes to me. Grace and Thea were two of the only real friends I’d ever had. Then, I guess when we started to become close, it had gone from absolute hate to respect so quickly, that the constant poking and nagging one another just became our thing. I didn’t see how strong our relationship really grew.”
“So, what you’re saying is, I’m your bestie,” Brock adds with a wide smile.
Looking at him, I realize that through everything: breaking up with Ben all those years ago, moving away to California for school, decisions I made for my career. It was always Brock I turned to for support. He was the one person I knew would drop everything for me to be what I needed at the moment. “Yeah, we’re besties.”
Brock leans over the console taking me into a side hug. “I knew it. But just because we’ve made a groundbreaking revelation about our friendship doesn’t mean you get to go soft on me, Batin.”
I let out a chuckle. “You know me better than that. Now that I know we are connected on a celestial level, I ain't holding back. You best prepare, Alderson.”
Just as Brock gives me another tight squeeze, there is a knock on my window. When I look over, Ben is standing there with a not to impressed look on his face.
I open the door and step out. “Hey, I missed you.”
He takes me in for a hug, placing a soft kiss on my lips. “I missed you too.”
“Hey, Ben,” Brock calls as he makes his way out of the car.
A slow, quiet growl rolls from Ben’s throat. I tap him softly on the shoulder, making him understand he needs to be nice. So, although forced, he grumbles out a, “Hey.”
Brock nods then leaves us, making his way toward the rest of the family already gathered in Bane and Thea’s backyard.
“I don’t like it when you spend time with him,” Ben expresses.
I lean back in his embrace, looking up to him. “Understood. But you need to understand that regardless of your feelings toward him, Brock is a good friend. He’s never done anything to me, and therefore I won’t turn away from his friendship.”
Ben holds his gaze with mine. “Not even if I don’t like it?”
“If you were to give me a legitimate reason as to why I shouldn’t be his friend, then I would think about it, but you can’t. The only reason you dislike him is because of his past actions, which he has apologized for and proven that he is not that person. Ben; Brock, and I actually just spoke about this on the way here, and until that conversation, I didn’t realize how much he wormed his way into my life and how big of a part he plays. I didn’t see it, but over the past eight years, Brock has become my confidant and my best friend
. Ben, he’s become, my family.”
With his eyes still focused on me, Ben lets out a breath. “I hate that you have an answer to everything. I hate it more that he was there for you at a time I wasn’t.”
“If it makes you feel any better, he likes you and thinks that we were made for each other. Give him a chance, Ben. I promise, you’ll see what I mean, if not right away then eventually—trust me, he will grow on you.”
Ben lets out another deep breath, tightening his embrace and lowering his forehead to mine. “Only because it means a lot to you.”
“Thank you.”
He lets out a chuckle. “You owe me, angel.”
“Oh yeah, and what would I owe?” I ask playfully.
He tilts his chin just enough that his lips are barely brushing mine. “Well, we can start with this.” Ben’s lips gently take mine, and instantly, I’m lost.
There will always be people I love in my life, each of them with important roles to play. But none of them could ever provide me with the instant peace and love that a mere touch from Ben fills me with. I love him, always have, and now that the walls I built are coming down, he is soon to take over my world.
Chapter Eighteen
-Ben-
The afternoon has been great. I can honestly say that these are the times I love most; the times when we are all together. It’s impressive to see how much our family has grown. We went from a family of seven to one of sixteen in just a few short years, and hopefully, if things work out with Ati and me, that number will grow further. I look over to where she is seated with my sister, holding Thea’s little one—it’s a picture worth a thousand words.
Lost in my thoughts, it takes me a moment before I realize my nephew Cal is standing in front of me.
“Hey, little man.” He looks up to me through his dark-rimmed glasses. It’s funny, but every so often when I look at him, it’s like looking in a mirror. Liam hates when I say that, but the reality is, Cal is his Uncle Ben through and through. “What’s going on?”
He straightens, almost like he’s preparing for a debate, then in a soft voice, says, “Well, I see that you brought a gift bag with you.”
I bend over in my chair slightly, looking to where I had placed the bag when I got here. “Oh, yeah, I forgot I put that there.”
That’s a lie. When I arrived earlier, I saw him eyeballing the bag, and he has been ever since. I was wondering how long it would take him to come over and ask what was in the bag. Not as long as I had expected. I thought I would have had to approach him with it. Cal is somewhat of an introvert. Once again, a lot like me. Unfortunately, the other boys are not, which leaves Cal short-changed much of the time, because they tend to overshadow him, and he ends up with whatever is left or sometimes without. So, whenever I can, I try to nudge him a little to get him to ask for what he wants.
“Is there something you wanted to ask?”
He lets out a small breath, looking between the bag and me. “Well, I was hoping that might be my microscope. Just maybe.”
“Just maybe, huh?”
He nods.
“Well, little man, today is your lucky day.” I reach down and pull out the bag, handing it to him.
Shaking with so much excitement, he kneels on the grass and carefully removes the microscope from the bag. “Wow, you fixed it up super good—It’s even better than before.”
“That’s because Uncle Benny’s the best,” I reply with a chuckle.
He stands, throwing himself in my arms. “Thank you, Uncle Ben.”
“Anything for you, little guy. Now when your brother’s or cousins try to take it, you tell them Uncle Ben said, hands off.”
Cal gives me a quick wide-eyed nod, then heads over to his mom to show her his new microscope.
“Thanks for that, Ben. He’s been missing that thing,” my brother Liam mentions.
“I know his pain all too well. You guys would always steal my stuff and break it, but I didn’t have anyone to replace it. Dad always used, ‘you can’t blame your brothers for you not taking better care of your things,’” I reply.
Kai leans in. “You should have had better hiding spots.”
Liam and Ewan nod in agreement.
“Yeah, well, in my defense, I thought Mom and Dad’s bookshelf in the study was a safe place. I honestly didn’t think any of you would step foot in there, you know, in fear you might actually have to pick up a book and learn something.”
Ewan scoffs, “I read.”
Kai nods. “I’ll vouch for Ewan. Just the other day, I saw him reading Pajama Time to the boys, and Doc only had to help with a couple of words.”
We all let out a roar of laughter.
“You guys are asses,” Ewan lets out, standing from his chair. “I’m going to where my intelligence is appreciated.”
My father pats Ewan on the shoulder. “Oh, maybe not right now, son. The girls just got Sawyer and Asher down for nap time.”
More laughter erupts, and Ewan looks to him. “You know, as my parent, you should defend my honor.”
My father clears his throat. “I’m sorry, you’re right. Boys, stop picking on your brother. In his defense, those words that Doc helped him with had more than two syllables.”
Ewan looks to us, then to my father. “Just remember this, old man...I may be the tie-breaking vote as to where you spend your geriatric years.”
With that, Ewan walks away.
“Good thing he has a thick skin,” Liam says.
“Everyone knows that the youngest in the family is always teased the most. It’s like a rite of passage or something,” adds Kai.
“Thea’s the youngest,” I mention.
Kai looks to me, eyes wide. “Yeah, but she scares me.”
Bane joins the circle taking a seat. “Are you talking about my wife?” We all give him a nod, and he chuckles. “Yeah, I hear you. Whenever I’ve done something to make her mad, I sleep with my back to the wall, and one eye open.”
“There’s always Asher’s new playhouse. I’ll even throw down a bale of hay for you to make it all cozy like,” my father mentions.
Another round of laughter breaks out, but Bane just stares at my father unamused—it’s been a constant banter between them. But all that aside, my father would give his life for Bane, just as he would any of us. And Bane—Bane, has nothing but the utmost respect for the old man. Even when it all went down with Thea and him, even though he didn’t back down, he still thought of my father as a role model. Bane’s a great husband to Thea, and now that Asher is in their lives, I know he is going to be just as great a father.
I look back over to Ati with a smile on my face as the thought of a future with her flashes before me. But the smile doesn’t hold long as I see Brock approach her, taking a seat right next to her.
“Why the glum face, little brother?” Kai asks, but not answering, forces Kai to look in the same direction as me. “Ah, I see.”
“Yeah, unfortunately, Ati doesn’t. She seems to think he wants nothing from her except friendship.”
Kai lets out a breath. “Can I be honest with you, Ben, without you getting angry.”
I turn to look at him. “Say what you have to say.”
“Ever heard of self-sabotage?”
I look to him, not knowing where he is going with this, and ask, “What are you talking about.”
Kai leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “This is what you do, and you do it without even knowing.”
“Kai, just say it,” I let out.
“It’s like you’re the eternal pessimist. When things are going well for you, almost better than what you think they should be, you look for something that is either not right or could end up causing a problem down the road.”
I let out a dry laugh. “That’s what I do...that’s my job.”
“Exactly...it’s your job to think like that...when you are working and dealing with contractors and clients, not when you’re working through your personal life.”
I s
tare at my brother for a moment taking in what he said. Do I really do that? “Are you saying that I’m doing that with Ati?”
“Yes,” Kai replies without hesitation. “And you did it the last time with her as well.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Yeah, you did. Ben, Brock is not the threat to yours and Ati’s relationship—you are.”
Kai stands, leaving me with only a pat on the shoulder and his apparent words of wisdom. I sit there in silence. Has it really come to me taking advice from Kai—Kai, the eternal droll of the family? The one whose motto is; taking risks is life’s best rush, and therefore they have the most rewarding outcomes. The guy that chose a profession free-climbing large rock formations and jumping into mass bodies of water from helicopters, and now, apparently, he has become a relationship guru—I did not see that coming.
The benefit of the doubt, Ben…give Brock the benefit of the doubt.
I inhale deeply and head over to where everyone else has seemed to migrate. I take a seat on the other side of Ati, just as Ginny comes flying out of the side yard.
“Kai, deal with your boys, there scaling the side of Thea’s garage.”
My brother looks over to assess the situation and yells out, “Boys, what did I tell you about climbing?”
Their two oldest look at one another, then back to Kai, and let out in unison, “Safety first.”
Kai smiles. “Good job.” He then turns to Ginny. “See, Red, it’s all good. They have it under control.”
She puts her hands on her hips, and in a stern voice, scolds, “Kai!”
He lets out a breath. “Okay, okay. I’m on it, babe.” He then turns, heading over to his kids. “Boys, make room for one more.”
Ginny throws her hands up in defeat. “And you all ask why we stopped at three. He would be the reason why; he makes up for at least two, the big oaf.”
We all let out a laugh, Gwen saying, “Yeah, but would you want him to change?”
Ginny looks over to where Kai is with the boys checking harnesses and watching over them. “Never, the way he is-is exactly why I wake up every morning and count my blessings. He’s just the right kind of perfect for me.”
Ben & Matilda- Infinite Promise Page 16
