Control

by J. F. Jenkins

  Why did everything have to be so complicated? All he wanted was to be accepted and productive. The better he operated, the more smoothly things would go for his family, for him, and Alona. He missed her terribly. If he could gain good influence on his ship, he could protect her. As of right now, he felt worthless. Tuliy’s criticism wasn’t helping much, even if Alan knew he was right.

  Tuliy nodded, guzzling his water in one smooth motion. The man even drank perfectly. “You’ll figure it out. Of this I’m confident. You’re smarter than everyone else gives you credit for. So many were amazed by your success with The Doctor. The maps you created of the tunnel system are also valuable. Now that area belongs to us, and we can use it to meet on the planet without being so obvious. What makes it even better was you weren’t ordered to. Most Juniors spend their time waiting for the next task. Once you get your charges in line, you’ll be unstoppable. It’s too bad Sir Orioltogorthan is so ashamed of you.”

  “I’m not respectful of him. Not like I should be. He has every reason to be shamed by my behavior. We have a peculiar relationship. It’s complicated.” Alan sighed, not sure if he should elaborate on all of the problems surrounding his superior and his family.

  “Most things are,” Tuliy said softly.

  “He and my father were rivals when they were younger. It’s something that still feeds their relationship to this day. I wasn’t supposed to be placed here, but now that I am, I’m under constant scrutiny. For the first time since I’ve been on board this ship though, I feel as if I’m being looked at like I’m worthwhile. Almost to the point where this feud has disappeared. Still, I worry he’ll use all of this against me later just to get back at my father.” He let out a deep breath, feeling a small weight lift from his shoulders. This wasn’t a fear he’d ever talked about before with anyone, not even Alona.

  Tuliy nodded as he listened, his eyes staying glued to the vast reaches of space. “Yes, complicated. Sometimes I stare at this planet and think of all its complications, all of the ones we have back home, and all of the problems in the universe as a whole. Want to know what I realized?”

  “What?”

  “When one complication ends, another takes its place.” He paused and his hazel eyes met Alan’s blue ones. “But they do end.”

  “True.”

  “I’m glad we can talk like this. It’s nice to have an intelligent conversation and not have to worry about the hidden agenda.”

  “So you’ve alluded to.” Alan almost reciprocated the feeling, but the teens he worked with made him more skeptical and cynical than he remembered being in the past.

  “Someday I hope to not make you so nervous.”

  “It’ll come with time. You’re the only person who wants me around here, so it’s not something I’m used to.”

  Tuliy sighed and shifted so he was now leaning with his back against the window instead of staring out of it. “I hope we can find this doctor soon. The implications of his work are frightening for our war.”

  Alan hadn’t taken the time to think much about that. He wasn’t sure he wanted to, but maybe it would be the final factor in making Orlando, Cadence, JD, and now Angela, understand the full gravity of the mission of Alan’s tribe.

  Chapter Five

  Pacing his foyer, Orlando listened to his girlfriend talk about all of the simple things of the day. Cheerleading practice, how her brother burned dinner tonight, and basically everything under the sun outside of their topic at lunch. Which is why she wanted him to call tonight. She had said there was more to say, right? He hadn’t made that part up had he? He listened to her talk anyway, saying the appropriate “uh huh” and “okay” and even nodding when needed.

  “Can you believe Mrs. Henley gave us two chapters of reading for the weekend? Doesn’t she know it’s a holiday? I have a lot of socializing and shopping to do. Now I have to read and do the questions at the end of the section?” Tait whined.

  “It’s nothing drastic. I finished it in ten minutes,” Orlando mumbled. “So you’re one of those Black Friday three-in-the-morning crazy ladies who attack all of the stores for the ninety-nine-cent DVD sale?”

  “When you say it like that, it sounds so negative.”

  “I believe Black Friday is of the devil to ruin the holidays even more than the petty family drama. Besides, it’s all a corporate trap.” Now he was just making things up, but it sounded good at the time. He was smiling, even if she couldn’t see it. He hoped she could sense he was telling a joke.

  “Well, as you’ll find out, shopping is generally the highlight of the week even if I do have to push my way through crazies to get a good deal. Remember how I said the little things keep me going? This is one of those little things.”

  “Thanksgiving that bad?”

  “My grandparents are opinionated, which makes my parents edgy, which makes me even more so. On top of that, my cousins are privileged brats who think they own everything and everyone. If my brother Peyton wasn’t such a saint and lovable it’d be miserable.”

  “Oh, so they’re a lot like me! We’ll get along perfectly.”

  She snorted from laughing so hard. “You’re a lot of things, but definitely not like them. You don’t flaunt things, and your bratty moments are like heaven compared to theirs.”

  “Glad to know you think so highly of me,” he mumbled.

  “You know I...”

  “Hmm?” He raised an eyebrow.

  “What?”

  “You going to finish that thought?”

  She was quiet for a moment, and followed it with a light laugh. “You know I only think the best of you.”

  Orlando was pretty sure she was going to say something else, but he sighed with relief when she didn’t. If she’d dropped the “L” word on him, he wasn’t sure how to handle that. A lot of the things he felt with Tait were new for him. The one other girl he’d dated, and thought he’d loved, turned out to be nothing more than fourteen-year-old puppy love. This ended up being to his advantage of course because this girl had been a gold digger. He’d only liked her because she was cute and giggly which is what most boys in his social circle were into at the time. Now he was attracted to smart girls who also happened to be cute. Intelligence was more the necessity or else he’d get bored fast.

  Did he love Tait though? He needed more time to figure that out and explore what his definition of the emotion even was to begin with. The added pressure of her telling him she felt that way was not going to help him figure it out any faster.

  “Yes, I’m sure you do,” he said.

  “Doubting me?”

  “No, actually.”

  “Good, because I only talk you up. You should have heard me this afternoon when I was asking about Thanksgiving. Mom’s thrilled with the idea.”

  He swallowed. “So long as you didn’t paint an unrealistic picture of me to her, I should be able to handle attending. My sister is officially going to her boyfriend’s. I’ve been invited to join of course, but seeing as how I’ve interacted with him a whole three times, I’d rather not.”

  “Do you not like him?”

  “He’s nice enough, but our conversation consists of ‘hey, good to see you again’, and then they leave the house to suck face or something.”

  “They have to leave the house? We do that on your couch,” she teased.

  “Not when she’s home.” He bit his lip and his face grew hot at the idea of his sister walking in on him and Tait kissing. Sucking face was a stretch. There wasn’t even tongue involved yet, so he didn’t think it counted, but he’d humor her. She knew more about this stuff anyway apparently, so maybe he was wrong to begin with. If his sister Lyssa ever saw them so much as hand holding, he’d never hear the end of it. The two had yet to even meet.

  “Anyway,” he added quickly, “they go out on dates and what not. She knows I’m not comfortable with the idea of her having a boyfriend. The past few times she’s had one it never ended well, and since my parents aren’t home the duty of protecting
her from man scum falls on my shoulders.”

  “Naturally.”

  “Plus I told her it was against the rules to do that anywhere I could see it. I like to keep my food in my stomach.”

  “You’re so funny.” She laughed.

  “I’m not sure what’s amusing about it.”

  “It’s hard to explain, but I’ve never met a guy like you before. You’re so anti-PDA, but at the same time when it’s just us you’re not exactly shy. You talk the talk, but don’t exactly walk the walk.”

  “Are you calling me an oxymoron?”

  “All I’m saying is I think it’s cool. Because you don’t play head games. It’s not like I think you’re a poser bad boy or something. I mean, you can be a huge jerk to people you don’t like. When you want to, you’re the biggest gentleman I’ve ever met. You respect me.”

  “Because you’ve earned it,” he said softly, his mind wandering to their earlier conversation. Vance hadn’t respected her. Was he the only one she dated who didn’t? There were a lot of what-ifs floating around in Orlando’s head. She’d told him she had four boyfriends before him. Was Vance the only one she’d been in love with? Slept with? Did she fall hard and fast for everyone she dated? Or were her previous relationships, sans Vance, more like Orlando’s two? Nothing more than innocent flirtations.

  Tait sighed. “Anyway, I’m trying to compliment you here. This air of mystery you have going, along with your soft teddy bear thing, is working. It’s hot. It’s...”

  Don’t say it. Please don’t.

  “Sexy.”

  He closed his eyes, and bit his lip. This was a good thing, but not good timing. Plus the way she was going about it made him feel like she was buttering him up for something, or preparing him for bad news.

  “I’ve been told I have a certain charm to me,” he deadpanned in an effort to remain cool and composed.

  “Which is why my parents are going to love you, so please, please, please come to Thanksgiving.”

  “You did say please, so I guess I have to.” Now though he wasn’t sure who he should be more worried about. Her parents, her grandparents, or her cousins. Good thing her twin brother Peyton would be there too, or else Orlando might end up going crazy. If they were going to be a real couple, he’d have to bite the bullet eventually. Same with introducing her to his sister.

  Tait let out a sigh, and he wondered if it was done in relief. “Thank you, and thank you for everything else too.”

  “I’m not sure what—”

  “With Vance. It can’t be an easy pill to swallow. I probably should have mentioned it sooner than now, but I was worried about what you’d think of me or if it would change our relationship. You know what I mean?”

  Not really. But he didn’t ever understand girl logic.

  “I guess I was wrongfully worried you might think that meant we...” she said.

  “Oh.” He didn’t want her to finish that thought. The idea of sleeping with her gave him tingles and knots all at the same time. His male teenage hormones waged war with the logic and inner workings of his heart. It was way too soon to even be considering this path with her. Wasn’t it? He didn’t know much about what was normal anymore for teenagers, but he was pretty sure not jumping into bed with her after a handful of weeks was a good thing. It felt right to him at least.

  Neither of them said anything for such a long time that he had to check to make sure she hadn’t been disconnected from the line. He heard Lyssa come home from wherever she’d been, probably with her boyfriend, and decided it was a good time to move to a new location so she wouldn’t eavesdrop. Climbing the stairs quickly, he went up to his room and shut the door.

  Tait was breathing hard on the other end, and it took him a moment to figure out she might be upset. “I’m not weirding you out am I?”

  “Not exactly. I had to move before my sister started bugging me and asking five million questions I don’t want to deal with right now. She’s super nosy.” He got comfortable on his bed. “Anyway, Tait, dear, you need not worry about me being bothered here because I’m not. The past is the past. Neither of us can change it. Now, you said there was more you wanted to talk about?”

  “I’m paranoid this will change everything and I—I like you a lot.”

  “We all have our past problems,” he said. I certainly have loads of them.

  “I guess you’re right.”

  “You know I am. It doesn’t bug me.” Not in the ways she was no doubt thinking. He didn’t know a lot about women, but living with Lyssa through her high school drama shed a little light on these sorts of things for him. One thing he noticed was they had a tendency to get wrapped up in what other people thought of them. Granted, he had his moments too, but girls were different about it. He wanted her parents to like him for simplicity’s sake more than the need for approval. Tait seemed to be seeking the opposite. Did she need his validation? Is that why she was freaking out so much?

  He was pretty sure he heard her hiccup before sniffling. “I should probably go,” she whispered.

  “Before you do,” he said and paused, searching for the right words. He hated when she cried and especially being the cause of it. “I want to make sure you understand how I feel. I don’t think less of you. I promise. It wasn’t your fault. I’m not mad or disappointed in you, but I am with him. You’re quite possibly the most beautiful and strongest person I’ve ever met, so don’t let him win. Or forget that, okay? I…” The words got stuck in his throat. Not yet. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  More sniffling, but when she spoke next he thought she sounded in a better mood. Her tone lifted a little, and she wasn’t so hard to hear. “Thank you. Goodnight Orly.”

  “Goodnight.” He hung up and stared at his ceiling. Why did this have to happen now? Relationship drama was more than normal, but he wasn’t so sure he could balance it on top of searching for the villainous evil doers who worked for The Doctor and the poor victims who had suffered at his hands. Orlando almost wished he’d talked about this earlier with her. Yes, there was still stuff he had to do for Alan then, but he was in training. It didn’t require as much of his mental energy. Now he was starting to enter the realm of too many changes at once.

  Hopefully Tait would believe him and this problem could be done for the time being. Ideally it wouldn’t come up again until they were ready to take their relationship to the next level, and even then he silently prayed he’d be over any petty insecurities. Love would make it easier, he was sure. Now all he had to do was wait to feel it.

  He stood from his bed, ready to go down and greet his sister before dinner and get all of his family socializing duties over and done with. Lyssa had beaten him to the punch because she knocked on his door and then entered just as he was about to step out.

  “Yes?” he asked and raised an eyebrow.

  “Just coming to see where you were. I thought I heard you talking.”

  “I was on the phone.” He pushed his way past her so they could eat. His stomach was starting to grumble.

  She matched his pace, watching him as they walked. “With?”

  “My girlfriend.” He rolled his eyes.

  “I was just curious. You don’t need to be so secretive. It’s my job to know these things.”

  A smirk formed on his lips. How long would it take for her to realize he wasn’t lying to her? Why would he lie about it to begin with? He’d never done it before. Sarcastic comments were his specialty, but those were always based around a nugget of truth. She probably thought he was referring to Cadence. Lyssa was still getting used to the idea of him actually having friends for a change, which might have been why she was so nosy. Clearly, nobody would like him unless something was going on. Granted, something was happening, but it still annoyed him. He was likable. Tait proved that.

  Lyssa continued to stare at him as they stepped into the kitchen. “You’re not pulling my chain are you? I was wondering how long it would take for you to ask C—”

  “Not her. Rem
ember how I told you about the Sadie Hawkins dance, and how I was in negotiations with a girl?” He went to the refrigerator to start looking for something edible. Leftovers tonight. It was every man for himself.

  “Yes?”

  “I went to that dance in case you forgot.”

  “I didn’t realize you had a date.”

  “It was never brought up again.” He picked up some cold pizza, and a baked potato. He’d start there and let his sister at least have a few options before cleaning house.

  She nodded. “Note to self. Remember to continue inquiries and ask you a lot of annoying questions. So who is she?”

  “My girlfriend.”

  “Yes, but does she have a name?”

  “Tait, and she’s the captain of the cheerleading squad.”

  Both of his sister’s eyebrows shot up. “A cheerleader?”

  “I told you about her before. Why are you so surprised?” He sighed, putting the potato in the microwave before getting everything he needed to fix it up to his liking. She continued to watch him, and it was making him uncomfortable. What was her problem?

  Now she was smiling, smirking even, and he saw a slight glimmer in her eyes he hadn’t noticed in a long time. “You have, yeah. I shouldn’t be surprised, I know. I’m not, not exactly. It’s just nice to see you returning to normal.”

  His jaw tightened and he ignored the beep of the microwave for the time being so he could glare at her. “And what exactly is that supposed to mean?”

  “Don’t get mad.”

  “Then stop talking like there’s something wrong with me.”

  “There isn’t, but you can’t deny that ever since Dallas died you’ve changed.”

  Is she really going here? His dead best friend was the last thing he ever wanted to discuss with anyone. Nobody understood, and he was tired of trying to make them get it. “Or maybe I’m being more like I’m supposed to.”