Hold You Close (Seattle Sound Series Book 3)

by Alexa Padgett

  As angry as I was that Mila left me after she’d promised to be there, waiting for me, I worried more about her surviving the next few hours. By the time we were on the open highway, another twenty minutes had passed, putting Mila nearly an hour closer to Jordan. To find and hurt her.

  I handed Jake his phone, tilted my head back, and did something I’d never done before. Not when my dad beat my mum, not when house foreclosure was imminent. Not when Mila dumped me the first time.

  I prayed.

  27

  Mila

  Much as I wanted to silence my phone, I couldn’t do that. I had to wait for the next set of instructions from Jordan. But each time Murphy’s name popped up over the last twenty minutes, I inched closer to losing control.

  I shoved my hand into the pocket of my cardigan once again, wishing Murphy didn’t have my pills. Ever since Jordan’s call, I was jittery, on edge. In desperate need of my Xanax, my escape and prison all in one.

  Ironic that I’d finally started to see relief from the symptoms just to fall right back in, harder than before.

  Much as I wanted to talk Noelle out of coming with me, I wasn’t able to do so. Her presence next to me both added to and mitigated some of my worries. “I want you to go to the front desk and wait there,” I said.

  Noelle was stubbornly silent, but her white knuckles showed she was just as scared as I was. I gave in and texted Murphy. What if this was my last chance to say something to him?

  Jordan called. He has Tanya. I had to come. I love you. Then, now. Always.

  Not enough. I wasn’t sure I’d ever finish telling Murphy everything.

  I swallowed down the bile that threatening to spew forth so many times in the few hours. The cab pulled up in front of the hospital. I leaned forward and handed the cabbie my credit card.

  “Go to the nearest police station,” I begged Noelle.

  “I’m not leaving you,” she said. Her lips trembled before she tightened her jaw. “Though he probably wants to cap me, too.”

  I took her hands in mine, unsurprised hers were clammy, too. “Please? Let the dispatch know I went inside because Jordan threatened Tanya’s life.” Noelle’s nod was reluctant, her face too pale.

  “Lady, I can’t let you walk in there knowing that mad man’s trying to get you. It’s been all over the news.”

  “There’s a pregnant woman inside who’s going to be shot if I don’t respond in person in the next”—I glanced down at my phone—“ten minutes. You don’t have a choice.” I sucked in a breath as I watched his weathered face crumple. “And neither do I.” I hugged Noelle hard. My chin wobbled. “Tell Murphy I love him. That he’s all I think about.”

  I slid out of the car before either Noelle or the driver could say something else. I ran through the front door before my knees turned to mush. I shuddered, wondering if this would be my last chance. To run. To breathe. To love.

  The front atrium’s bright lights slammed against my night vision–sensitive eyes, the bustle of a normal hospital mind-numbing.

  “I need to report a threat to a patient here,” I said, my knees knocking. Please don’t let me get Tanya and her baby killed. I cleared my throat and shoved my phone at the security guard. “He said he was in her room. That he’d kill her.”

  The guard’s bushy white brows shot up, his thin lips flattening further, but he picked up the phone and dialed. Once he’d given the information to the police dispatcher, he looked up at me, his rheumy eyes filled with concern.

  “Shelter in place, young lady. You don’t do anything until the police show up.”

  The warning signal blared from the speakers. I startled hard. Oh, God. What had I done? What if Jordan knew the signal? What if he hurt Tanya now because I’d called in the threat?

  I sprinted away from the desk. The guard yelled at me to stop but I barreled into the elevator, slamming my hand against the Close button, before pressing the button for the third floor.

  Stepping back from the control panel, I sagged against the wall. I gripped the metal bar in the elevator as I sailed upward to face one of my demons.

  I would end this sick fascination of Jordan’s. On my terms. No matter the outcome, I wasn’t going to fear him again.

  I’d left my phone at the guard’s stand. Dammit. I’d wanted the connection to Murphy. I pulled his image up. Mentally, I traced his thick brows, the strong line of his nose. Those sharp cheekbones and stubborn jaw. His soft lips. With his image planted firmly in front of me, I took a deep breath. I would survive this to see Murphy again. If he still wanted me after my stunt tonight.

  When Murphy was upset or angry, he mouthed off, acted out. He’d do something incredibly stupid—like talk to the media—and destroy our chance at a life together. Even with his spontaneous edge that teased the line of self-destruction, I loved him. I loved him because he couldn’t quite control his emotions. Because he cared about me so much. If I made it out of here tonight, I’d tell him that in person.

  Or I might die in this building tonight and Murphy would implode as well. I didn’t like that option near as much.

  The elevator chimed and the doors slid open.

  The series of beeps—hospital code for credible threat and shelter in place—no longer sounded. My footfalls seemed achingly loud in the too-quiet space.

  No one walked the halls. Most of the doors were shut. A hand slid onto my shoulder. I jumped and screamed.

  “Jesus, Mila. You almost gave me a heart attack,” Noelle’s cheeks paled.

  “What do you think happened to me? You were supposed to go to the police station. Please.”

  She swallowed as she scanned the waiting room nearby, noting, as I had, the strange quietness of the place. “ICU is under heavy lockdown, with additional police and security, emergency surgeries sent to other area hospitals, but the rest of the wards and here . . .” she spread her arms out to encompass the main hospital. “This is as barebones as the place can get.”

  “Noelle—”

  “I called Sasha. She moved Tanya down to ICU. As soon as you jumped from the car. I told her why. She said she’d do it.”

  I closed my eyes against the fear trying to take over my mind. The need to flee was consuming. “Thank you. Now go home. Please.”

  “Kevin called. He’s asked some of his cop buddies to find you here.”

  “I have to go in there. I have to be sure he hasn’t hurt Tanya or the baby.”

  The alarm sounded again. I tensed, expecting Jordan to pop out of one of the rooms. She tugged my shoulders and turned me to face her. “You don’t, but I can’t stop you. Just know you aren’t doing this alone. Your job is to stay safe and get home with your sexalicious boyfriend.” She hugged me hard and disappeared to the left—toward the stairs—before I managed to speak past the knot of emotion in my throat.

  I stepped into the L and D ward hall, also silent.

  I pulled out my badge and moved through the quiet, sterile hallway. Two more sets of doors and I was in Tanya’s room, my heart pounding a million miles per second. Her bed lay empty, just as Noelle said it would. I bit my lip.

  I prayed Jordan hadn’t shot her as he’d threatened. The bed sheets were white, not stained in blood. I gripped the edge of the bed, my finger wound tight into the metal bar and hoped for Tanya’s—her baby’s—continued safety.

  I opened my eyes, listening, waiting for Jordan to come out from his hiding place. One minute turned into ten, maybe more. Nothing. Jordan wasn’t here.

  Okay. Something was wrong.

  I touched Tanya’s pillow, the fetal monitor. “I’m so sorry,” I whispered. “Be safe.” Without my phone, I didn’t know what to do next. I stepped out into the hall, moving slowly and with as much caution as I could muster.

  The hall’s bright lighting was a shock. I blinked a few times, trying to acclimate to the difference.

  “Ms. Trask?”

  Three men jogged toward me. I pushed my back against the wall.

  “We’re colle
agues of Kevin Granger. He asked us to see you safely back to your hotel room.”

  I opened my mouth but no words came out. Instead, I watched, horror making my vision tunnel, as red blossomed across the man’s chest. Another man—an innocent man—collapsed next to the first. The third pulled his gun from his holster but he, too, was shot. Before I could move, a hand gripped my wrist.

  “So nice of you to join me,” Jordan murmured. “I was beginning to worry you didn’t care about the whiney bitch here as much as I’d anticipated.”

  The barrel of the gun dug into the back of my neck, which was slicked in sweat. Much as I wanted to see someone round the corner, I didn’t doubt that Jordan would shoot another person without thinking twice. Especially Murphy, whom Jordan hated with an obsession bordering on mania.

  The cold metal warmed against my skin; the heat transferring from my body up into the machine designed for destruction.

  I’d missed my chance to run while he’d been shooting those men. Stupid. So stupid.

  This time, I must break the cycle. Even though Murphy disagreed, this was my fight. While Jordan was bigger, stronger and probably faster, I was smarter, lighter and knew this building better. I wasn’t the fearful, incompetent girl Jordan met all those years ago.

  I just needed time to come up with another plan.

  “Why are you doing this?” I asked.

  “Your boyfriend flushed me out with his stupid media stunt. The police raided my motel room earlier today. Only sheer luck had me on the other side of the building.”

  I slowed my steps, not wanting to leave the bleeding men. Not wanting Jordan to touch me.

  “Hurry up,” he hissed, poking me in the back of the neck. The gun’s barrel caught my vertebrae and I winced.

  “You’re hurting me,” I whispered. Jordan liked it when I played the helpless damsel. For now, it was my best defense. “Guns scare me. Why did you have to bring a gun, Jordan?” I slowed my steps in time with my question, hoping to distract him long enough for someone to see us.

  “You weren’t paying attention. I told you, you are mine. Now, we’ll finally live together with your mum. A family. Happy.”

  His delusions were beyond insane. I slowed my steps again, wracking my brain for a topic to keep him distracted.

  “The laws here are different. Stalking carries harsher penalties here than in Australia.” I crossed my fingers, hoping Jordan hadn’t bothered to study the differences.

  He snorted. “I’m not stalking you, Mila.”

  As I rounded the next corner, I caught a flash of movement, springy curls flying out behind a hot pink shirt. Noelle. She ducked back into a patient’s room and settle behind the door, leaving it slightly ajar.

  “You killed my chances at conceiving when you murdered my baby.”

  “I did no such thing, Mila. That was an accident. You shouldn’t have tried to ride away from me. All this time, if you’d just done what you were supposed to, we could have avoided you being hurt. The police. This gun. But each time you need more incentive.”

  “You have to threaten the lives of the people I care about to make me stay in the same room as you. I will never, ever love you, Jordan.”

  “Stop lying,” he hissed. He grabbed my arm, his fingers digging deep into my flesh. “You’ve always loved me. I saw it in your eyes, then, whilst you lived with your mother and me. You’ve become such a tease, Mila. I’m going to slap it out of you one of these days. No man likes to be challenged.”

  “It’s a simple fact. I hate you. I’ll always hate you. You destroyed the most important relationship in my life. You killed my baby.”

  “You weren’t supposed to be hurt that day, but I’m not sorry I destroyed the rock star’s spawn. He’s not meant to have you, Mila. You don’t want a connection to that type of man.”

  “I loved my baby, and I love Murphy. I always will. You—you’re just the sad, pathetic stalker who can’t get the woman he wants without threats and weapons.”

  His hand moved from my arm to my hair. He yanked it, hard. My head fell back against his shoulder and my eyes filled with tears but I met his stare with my own, willing him to see all the loathing I felt for him.

  “Go to the stairwell,” Jordan said.

  Much as I didn’t want to respond, didn’t want to look at him, my head hurt. “I can’t walk like this.”

  He let go of my hair, and I started to pull away. He pressed his palm to my throat and kept the gun pressed to the base of my skull.

  “You could just end this,” I said, my eyes steady. Part of me wondered why I should stave off the inevitable. Jordan would kill me, eventually. At least if he did so now no one else would be hurt. “Pull the trigger. You know I don’t want to go with you.”

  His eyes widened. “I don’t want to kill you. I love you. I want to take care of you.”

  I stepped away, wincing at the pain in my neck and my tender scalp. I put up my arms, motioning around us. “This isn’t love. This is psychotic.”

  His eyes narrowed as his nostrils flared. “Go down the stairs, Mila. Now.”

  I sped up so he wouldn’t touch me again. But that just meant he kept pace and we were that much closer to leaving the building. If I did, if I got in a car with him, I wouldn’t end this night alive.

  Two flights of stairs to disarm him. Right. I sucked in air, trying to fill my lungs with as much oxygen as possible. Muscles needed more air to work optimally.

  We came up on the door. If it was like many others, it would open with ponderous slowness and shut even more slowly. I couldn’t try to slam it against his wrist and get him to drop the gun. I stood at the large metal door, unwilling to push it open. The stairwell, like the lot outside, was too far from the slim protection of the armed guards Kevin sent, the ones who were even now bleeding out. Jordan growled as he reached around me, impatient to get out of there.

  I hadn’t learned enough in my defense classes to beat Jordan in hand-to-hand combat, but I practiced using a man’s bodyweight against him. It’s a basic tenet of the form: unbalance the already unstable. Over and over again, I’d practiced these moves. Had I known then I’d need the training?

  A siren screamed, bouncing off the high ceiling and the wide, empty hall. I flinched at the noise, as did Jordan. He turned his head toward the alarm. Noelle darted away from the red box, toward one of the doors. I shoved my left foot back between both of his and gripped his arm on the door. I used his body weight to carry him forward, over my left shoulder. His right hand—the one with the gun—flailed. Heat seared my ear as a bullet whizzed by my head. Jordan tumbled into the metal door, his head catching on the release bar.

  He dropped the gun as he tried to break his fall, his body still careening forward into the stairwell. I spun out from under his body and shoved as hard as I could, trying to force him off the first step. My ears roared with the blood filling them. Hope built. The more noise he made, the quicker someone would find us.

  Get away as fast as you can. You may only have seconds. Make them count. My self-defense instructor’s words filled my head, and I ran. I darted down the corridor, breathless from the adrenaline.

  The gun! Why didn’t I pick it up? My steps faltered but I pushed forward, unwilling to give up my small victory. Going back would be stupid.

  Should I find a place to hide? I didn’t want to get caught in a small, enclosed place without another exit, but I also didn’t want to stay in the hall where I was easy to spot—and easy to pick off with that gun.

  I swung round the corner and slammed into a much larger body. His arms slid up to my shoulders, steadying me as I glanced up. I met the concerned gaze of the heavyset security guard who’d warned me to shelter in place in the hospital’s atrium.

  “He’s behind me.” I wasn’t sure how loud I’d spoken. My ears were buzzing and my head felt like it was stuffed with cotton. The man shoved me behind him. As I turned, a scream built in my throat. Jordan, head bloodied, raised his gun. I didn’t see him pull the trig
ger or witness the flash, but the impact was instantaneous. The guard’s thick body flinched as if struck by a hard blow. I screamed as he started to fall. Jordan walked forward and his voice was loud enough for me to hear over the din in my head.

  “Don’t hide from me.”

  He’d shot at least four people tonight. Plus Hank at the hotel pool. And those were just the people I knew about. He trained the gun on me, right in the middle of my chest. The barrel moved up, to the left. Every muscle in my body tightened to quivering urgency.

  “I’ll give you everything you ever wanted. I’ll love you right,” Jordan said, his face collapsing with grief. “Why isn’t that enough for you?”

  The ringing in my ears distorted his voice, but I was sure I’d heard Murphy scream my name. Jordan’s facial features filled with loathing, and I could see in his eyes that he planned to shoot again. Shoot Murphy.

  “Because you want to control my feelings. My body. My love. And you can’t.”

  I lunged forward. Jordan’s eyes widened as my body flew into motion. He wouldn’t hurt Murphy. I’d lost our baby, but I would not lose Murphy, too. Even if . . . even if he didn’t want me forever, even if I was just a passing fancy to him, Murphy deserved his chance at life, at happiness, and that meant ending this standoff. Now.

  Whatever Jordan read in my face caused him to flinch back. The bullet hit, ripping through my skin, shattering bone.

  I screamed, but the sound dulled as the pain hit. I looked at Jordan, eyes wide, mouth open as I gasped for air. He rushed toward me, arms outstretched as I fell to my knees. I reached for the gun, ignoring the searing heat against my palm as I ripped at the barrel.

  He called my name as I pulled harder, adrenaline spiking as I needed it. “Mila!” he sobbed.

  The gun. Get the gun away from him so he wouldn’t shoot Murphy.

  28

  Murphy

  Noelle’s frantic call said Jordan planned to lead her from the building by the south entrance. I kept running. They’d last been up here. Thanks to Kevin’s insane driving skills, we made it to the hospital in under twenty minutes, an impossible feat that nearly killed us half a dozen times. Not that I was complaining. Fast. She must know the odds of being found were low once she left the building. She’d figure out how to stay here.