Just This Once, Contemporary Romance (Last Frontier Lodge #3)

by J. H. Croix

  His brain went immediately elsewhere. She let out a laugh.

  “What?”

  “I’m talking about breakfast. Is it more clear if I say omelets or pancakes?”

  He grinned sheepishly. “Sure is. I’ll take an omelet. I’ve never been much of a pancake guy.”

  She arched a brow. “Figures.”

  He shoved the covers off and stood. “What do you mean?”

  “Pancakes are more frou-frou. You’re a manly man.” She grinned and turned away, her robe swirling behind her. As soon as she pushed through the door, Oscar rushed at her and then to Aidan.

  He searched out his clothes and tugged them on before following her into the kitchen. While she started coffee, he rummaged through the refrigerator, pulling out eggs, milk, feta cheese and a lonely red pepper. She leaned against the counter and watched him get the omelets ready.

  “I meant to cook for us,” she said.

  He shrugged. “I got it. I can whip up omelets fast. You’re about to head out on a long trip. Let me cook.”

  She twirled the tie of her robe around her hand as she watched him. “I didn’t know you were much of a cook.”

  “During my early days in the Navy before I got through SEAL training, one of my base duties was working in the kitchen. The main chef was a piece of work, but he was a hell of a cook and a tough taskmaster. I bitched about it at the time, but now I’m glad. I’ve been cooking for myself for years. It’s nice to enjoy what I make.”

  “Well, I guess I’m in luck this morning. I’m just a so-so cook. If you don’t mind, I’ll run Oscar out really quick while you cook.”

  “Go for it.”

  She yanked on clothes and took Oscar out briefly before returning. After she fed Oscar, she poured coffee for them both while he finished cooking. The next hour passed quickly. They dawdled too long over breakfast, which left Becca rushing around. Oscar shadowed every step of hers, following her around the apartment. She finally stood by the door. She’d insisted on tidying the apartment before she left, so he chipped in and ruthlessly cleaned behind her with her chuckling along the way.

  “Can’t help it. Military habits die hard.”

  Next thing he knew, he was carrying her suitcase downstairs. She carried Oscar’s bag in one hand with his leash held in the other. He tossed her suitcase in the back of her small hatchback. The shop had only just notified him two days ago that it was ready. He’d made arrangements to have it delivered to her. It looked good as new. Somehow he’d held his feelings at bay through the morning and figured he needed to keep his cool now. She clucked for Oscar to hop in on the passenger seat. He hopped in without hesitation.

  Becca looked up at Aidan, her glossy hair falling away from her face, the blue of her eyes bright in the gray morning. The mist had stopped, but the air was damp and chilly. “Well, that’s it then. I, uh, don’t have much time.”

  “I know.”

  “I’ll call you. Thanks for helping me this morning. I, uh…”

  Words only knotted him up inside, so he did the only thing he could think to do. He stroked his hand through her air and dipped his head. He caught her lips in a swift kiss. He allowed himself to dive into the warm sweetness of her mouth for only a second. Her tongue tangled with his before he forced himself to ease back, brushing his lips softly against hers.

  He took a definitive step back, stroking his hands down her arms. “Call me when you can. I’ll be in touch too.”

  Even though there was so much more he wanted to say, all he did was see her into her car and watch her drive away.

  Chapter 17

  Becca leaned against the railing on the ferry. She’d been on the ferry for two days and every moment she could, she was outside on the deck. The Inside Passage was more stunning than she’d imagined. The mountains rose tall on either side of the ferry. They were so close, it was as if she could reach out and touch them. They’d passed by glaciers whose otherworldly, translucent blue glowed brightly as if the glaciers were alive. The ferry was filled with an assortment of people—some were Alaskans who traveled the route often for work, while the rest were a wide variety of tourists. Oscar was accompanied by many other dogs, all of whom were allowed out for walks at every stop and were allowed to take scheduled breaks on the lower ferry deck. In addition to dogs, some travelers had cats, and there was a goat, a rabbit, and a pet turtle taking the trip.

  While it wasn’t as fancy as a cruise ship, the ferry served good meals in a cafeteria and even offered entertainment in the form of movies and a few other options. At the moment, Becca lifted her face to the sun and took a deep breath of the ocean air. Beyond the spectacular beauty of the area, they’d seen an abundance of wildlife—a few moose had been nibbling on the edge of a field in Ketchikan, a lumbering brown bear was sighted on the outskirts of another town they’d passed by, and a pod of orcas swam in the distance at one point. Birds were in abundance, including seagulls, eagles, puffins, loons and more.

  She was relived for the constant presence of natural wonders because it helped her manage the distraction of Aidan in her mind. When darkness fell and she was alone with her thoughts in her small cabin, her mind ran laps. She’d never meant to fall for anyone. Ever again. She’d gambled she could have just one night with Aidan, and it would wipe the slate clean of Kyle’s claim in her memory. In that, she had succeeded beyond her wildest dreams. If she never had sex ever again, she would flush every time she thought of Aidan. She hadn’t lied to him when she said they’d play it by ear when she got back, but part of her hoped she’d regain her footing again. She’d find the part of herself that had no trouble keeping men out of her life, the part of herself that didn’t feel vulnerable at the thought of what Aidan saw when he looked in her eyes, the part of herself that was in command of her life.

  She was glad she took this time and was blown away by the beauty of the Inside Passage. Yet, there was a pulsing ache in her heart. She couldn’t help but wish Aidan were here to share this journey with her. In her moments of sanity, when she was able to latch onto the prickly side of herself, she managed to roll her eyes and remind herself she needn’t be so squishy and wishful.

  After changing ferries in Juneau, she was on the last leg of the ‘marine highway’ portion of her trip. The ferry docked in Whittier early in the afternoon. Shortly after she drove her trusty hatchback off the ferry, she spied out a clearly labeled dog park. Several of the other dogs she’d seen on the ferry were already scampering about inside the fenced area. She glanced at Oscar. He had his nose poked out the window, his ears flapping in the soft breeze. He’d been an admirably good sport on the ferry with the scheduled breaks, but he was bursting with restless energy. She pulled into the small parking area and took him out. Once they were inside the fenced area, she unclipped his leash and watched him run around.

  She’d been able to manage her urges to call Aidan while on the ferry because they were usually out of cell range. While Oscar ran wild and played with the other dogs at the park, she couldn’t push back on the desire to hear Aidan’s voice anymore. She slipped her phone out of her pocket and called. He picked up on the third ring.

  “Hey there.”

  His gruff voice sent a rush of longing through her.

  “Hey. I’m officially on land for more than a break.”

  “Good to know. How was the ferry?”

  She found herself filling him in on the details of her ferry trip. Somewhere along the way, she realized she’d been talking non-stop for several minutes. “I guess I could ask how you’re doing,” she said when she paused for a breath.

  His low chuckle sent a shiver coursing through her. Sweet hell. Aidan didn’t even have to be near her, and he sent her body into a tailspin.

  “I’m doing. Nothing new here. Busy with work, all the usual stuff. How’s Oscar?”

  She looked over at Oscar who was currently carting a stick around as he circled the dog park, his tail wagging madly. “He’s happy as can
be right now. We’re at a dog park. At the moment, he’s playing king of the stick.”

  Another low chuckle from Aidan, and her pulse kicked up a notch. “So how far to Diamond Creek?”

  “About three hours. I’m going to let Oscar play for a little more and then we’ll hit the road.”

  There was a pause. Becca heard muffled voices, Aidan replied to something and then his voice came back clear. “Gotta go. Busy afternoon here. Can I call you tonight?”

  “Of course. I’ll talk to you later.”

  She wanted to say more, but she didn’t know what that would be, so she listened while he said goodbye and clicked off the line.

  ***

  Several hours later, the sign for Last Frontier Lodge came into view as Becca rounded a curve in the road. She smiled to herself and glanced to Oscar. He was turning out to be one of the best decisions she’d made, perhaps ever. He was an excellent traveling companion—steady, joyful, and alert. She’d forgotten how dogs had the unique ability to bring her right into the present moment. In the drive from Whittier to Diamond Creek, Oscar had watched the landscape roll by, sipping at the air from the window. It was late summer, which she was discovering was a lovely time of year in Alaska. There were clusters of birch and cottonwood turning yellow and gold, their leaves fluttering in the wind and blowing loose. They passed by several fields of fireweed, a wild flower that bloomed late and was a sight to behold, its flowers fuchsia. Entire swaths of open land undulated with the gorgeous flowers waving in the wind.

  She turned into the winding driveway that led up to the ski lodge. She had only vague memories of coming here to visit when she was a little girl. Their parents brought them during the holidays and in the summer. When their grandmother had passed away last year, she and her siblings had collectively inherited the lodge with Gage, the oldest, inheriting the largest share. None of them had realized the old ski lodge was still in the family. Their grandmother had boarded it up and moved to Washington after their grandfather passed away.

  Gage had promptly declared his intent to move to Diamond Creek and reopen the lodge. Becca had known he needed the change of pace. He’d been at loose ends since retiring from active duty and taking a civilian job on the base. He’d never been quite the same since one of his fellow Navy SEAL’s had died on a mission. Becca had worried her older brother, who leaned toward being serious and quiet, would never find his groove again. But she’d been wrong. He’d returned to Diamond Creek, the place they’d all been born, and found a sense of peace and purpose. He’d also fallen head over heels in love with Marley. Just thinking of the way Gage looked when he was with Marley brought a smile to Becca’s face.

  She pulled up into the parking lot at the lodge and climbed out of her car. The lodge sat at the feet of several mountain peaks on one side and faced Kachemak Bay on the other. The view spilled out in front of her. The bay shimmered under the early evening sun as it began its descent. A soft breeze blew through her hair. Oscar gave a soft bark, and she turned to open the car door. He leapt out, and she quickly clipped him on his leash. He was quite good about coming when she called, but she wasn’t sure if it was okay to let him run loose here. She wanted to give him a few days to adjust and make sure it was okay with Gage before she did that.

  At the sound of her name, she turned and saw Gage walking toward her. Gage carried himself with the same intense, coiled energy Aidan did. She figured it must be a side effect of being a Navy SEAL. Gage’s brown hair was windblown. His gray eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled as he reached her. He immediately engulfed her in a bear hug.

  “Hey sis! You made it almost exactly when you guessed.” He stepped back and knelt at Oscar’s side to pet him. “You must be Oscar.”

  Becca giggled. “He’s been great the whole way. I hope you don’t mind I brought him.”

  Gage stood. “Of course. Let me get your bags for you.” He turned and immediately checked the hatch, pulling out her suitcase and the small bag for Oscar right away.

  She shook her head. “You just can’t wait, can you?”

  He nudged the hatch shut with his elbow. “Wait for what?”

  “To take care of everything.” Aidan would have done the same. Just the thought sent a pang through her.

  Gage shrugged and grinned. “I like to be efficient.” He nodded toward the lodge.

  She grabbed her purse out of the front and walked at his side to the lodge. As soon as she stepped inside, Marley came through the archway from the back and ran to Becca’s side, immediately tugging her into a hug.

  When Becca stepped back, she eyed Marley. “You look great! How far along are you now?”

  Marley ran her hand over the rounded curve of her belly. “I’m due in five months, so I’m not quite halfway. You wouldn’t know if from the way I want to eat!”

  Gage grinned and leaned over to drop a kiss on Marley’s cheek. Becca felt tears prick in her eyes. Gage carried himself with a sense of peace and easiness she’d never seen for him.

  Marley gestured for Becca to follow her. “Come on, I’ll show you your room.” She started to take one of the bags from Gage, but he shook his head.

  “I got it.”

  Marley rolled her eyes, but Becca only laughed. “Give it up. He’s always been like this.”

  ***

  A while later, Becca sat on the couch in Gage and Marley’s private quarters in the lodge. Oscar was sound asleep between her and Marley. Gage and Garrett were at the kitchen table, currently in the thick of a game of cards. Delia walked over from the kitchen with two glasses of wine. She sat down in a rocking chair adjacent to the couch and handed Becca one of the glasses.

  “This one’s for you.” She tucked her honey gold hair behind her ear as she turned to Marley. “And none for you until you have that little baby girl.”

  Marley shrugged with a soft chuckle. She stroked Oscar slowly and glanced in Becca’s direction. “How was the Inside Passage? I’ve been in Alaska most of my life, but I’ve never been through there. I’ve heard it’s amazing.”

  “It is! When you have a little extra time, you should take the trip. It’s only four days all the way through.”

  Marley brushed her auburn hair away from her face. “It won’t be until after we have the baby. I can’t imagine even one full day out on the ocean like this, much less four.”

  “How’s your pregnancy been?” Becca asked.

  “For the most part, it’s going smoothly. I had a few bouts of morning sickness, but nothing horrible. Mostly, I just don’t like to wear anything other than giant clothes and definitely don’t like feeling stuck in one place. I get super antsy.”

  “Well, you look great! You’ve got that whole glow thing going on.”

  Gage called across the room. “I said the same thing this morning.”

  Marley flushed and rolled her eyes. Conversation moved on with Gage and Garrett eventually joining them. As the evening rolled by, Becca felt herself relaxing in a way she rarely experienced. Truth be told, she usually only felt this way when she was with her family. Different though they each were, she was close to all of her siblings. Gage was a rock—steady and always there when you needed him. Being a twin was hard to explain unless you were one. She and Garrett were connected in ways that often prompted her to wonder what life would be like without him. For each of them, they’d known, without knowing why, when the other needed them. Garrett had called her within moments of Kyle yanking his pants up and walking out of their shared apartment with the woman she’d thought to be her friend. Just as she’d known something happened to him that day so many years ago when he’d been in a car accident as a little boy.

  She glanced around the small cluster, and her heart squeezed. She was so happy for her brothers to have found love. Her heart twisted a little. For so long, she’d easily stuck to the belief she didn’t need love. She still didn’t think she needed it. Yet, watching her brothers fall in love and settle down elicited a sense of longing for the p
ossibility. She’d been so successful at persuading herself she didn’t need love, it was hard to consider anything else. Aidan was making her question too many things about herself and the boundaries she’d put around her heart. She gulped down the last of her wine and glanced around. Marley was nodding off, and Delia had begun to gather the dishes scattered around. Becca stood to help her. She enjoyed the soothing putter of tidying up.

  She followed Garrett and Delia out with Oscar right on her heels. When they reached the hall where she turned in the direction of her suite, Garrett threw his arm over her shoulder and gave her a squeeze. She glanced up into his blue eyes—so like her own—and tried to smile, but it wobbled the tiniest bit. Garrett, being her twin, instantly narrowed his eyes. “You okay?”

  She nodded, perhaps a little too quickly. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. Just tired from the trip.”

  Garrett gave her a quick squeeze and let his arm slide off her shoulder. She knew he sensed she wasn’t up for further discussion. If there were one thing she could count on from Garrett, he would give her space and only push if he thought she needed it.

  “How about you meet me for coffee tomorrow?” he asked.

  “Sure. How about I call when I’m up?”

  “Just don’t call too early. If you’re hankering for coffee at six, Delia will already have some going for you in the kitchen.”

  His wry comment knocked the tightness out of her chest. “Right. See you tomorrow,” she said with a wave as she turned down the hall.

  A while later, she rested on her side and stared at the stars outside the window. Oscar was sound asleep, curled up on the foot of the bed. Unlike her, he was free from the machinations of an overactive brain. She couldn’t stop thinking. Part of her missed Aidan, while another part of her thought perhaps she’d lost her mind. She’d shut men out of her life for good reason. This constant questioning, worry, and silly attempts to interpret nearly every interaction that had passed between her and Aidan was exhausting. She couldn’t knock her thoughts off the hamster wheel.