Just This Once, Contemporary Romance (Last Frontier Lodge #3)

by J. H. Croix

  “I, um…” Becca paused and brushed her fingers through her hair.

  “I know you didn’t know I was coming. I just… Well, when you told me not to call, at first, I was going to wait it out. But I didn’t want to accidentally send the wrong message. Back when I first kissed you, I told you it wasn’t nothing. I haven’t talked about it, but the thing is—I’ve wanted you for years.” Her eyes widened, and his heart was near to pounding out of his chest, but he kept going. He’d decided he was going to be honest, so he was. “I didn’t ever think it would go anywhere. Honestly, I convinced myself I could never act on it. I didn’t mean to change that, but then I did. I’m not sorry, but I’m also not going to stand by and let you think this doesn’t matter. I want you more than I’ve wanted anyone, and I want us to have a chance. I know you have your reasons for not trusting men, but I’m not going to walk away, and I’m not going to let you down. I’ll wait, but I’m not going to do that without making sure you understand how much you mean to me.”

  He ran out of words, somewhat stunned by all he’d said. The only thing he hadn’t said aloud was that he loved her. For a split second, he considered it, but he held back solely because he didn’t want to scare her away. He was already afraid he’d said too much.

  Becca’s eyes were bright with the sheen of tears. “I didn’t know,” she whispered. “I only asked you not to call because… Well, because I can hardly think straight. I didn’t know I was going to feel like this. After Kyle, it was just easier not to bother. I thought we could have just one night and that would be enough. It’s not and it’s making me crazy!” She shook her head sharply and swiped at the tears on her cheeks.

  He didn’t think. He simply stepped to her and wrapped her in his embrace. Her body softened against his. He felt her sigh. All he knew was it felt so good to hold her, he could hardly breathe. They stood like that for several moments. He managed to breathe and could feel the tension easing from her. As was the case whenever Becca was physically close, his body had its own ideas. Her lush curves were so tempting.

  She lifted her head from his shoulder. He glanced down, his eyes colliding with hers. His body tightened instantly. Her blue eyes were dark, the desire in them echoing his. Thought fled. He dipped his head and closed the distance between them, capturing her lips in a kiss.

  ***

  Aidan’s lips came against hers. For a flash, his touch was soft, as if asking a question. Currents of desire were surging through her. Heat blazed the moment his lips touched hers. She slipped her hand up around his neck and stroked her fingers into his hair. Their kiss went wild. His mouth laid claim to hers with deep strokes of his tongue. She met him stroke for stroke, arching against him. Heat twisted inside her. She’d missed him so much it had torn at her. To have him here, this close, this near—she couldn’t do anything other than allow herself to be swept into the tide of longing crashing through her.

  She was frantic. The pleasure of his touch was so acute, she could hardly bear it. She tore at his shirt, desperate to feel his skin. He took a step back and quickly unbuttoned his shirt, shrugging out of it. She sighed at the mere sight of him—the hard planes of his chest, his defined abs and arms of pure muscle. His eyes were on her like hot embers. The air around them crackled with tension. He stood stock still for a moment, his eyes coasting over her. Without lifting a finger, she felt the heat of his touch from his eyes alone.

  He lifted a hand and slowly reached for the tie of her robe. Her breath was shallow and her pulse skittered wildly as he slowly wound the robe tie around his hand. She could barely hear the slide of the fabric over the pounding of her heart as he loosened the tie and her robe fell open. The heat of his palms curled over her shoulders as he slowly slid the robe off. It fell to the floor in a rumple. She was bare in front of him. The need to touch him was so great, it rushed through her. She took a step and stroked a palm down his chest, savoring the flex of his muscles under her touch. His breath hissed through his teeth.

  “Becca…”

  He choked out her name. Want whipped through her, its lash tightening the need coursing through her. She tore at his jeans, curling her hand around his arousal. She shoved his briefs out of the way and leaned forward to take him in her mouth. A low moan tore from his throat. She knelt down and set to stroking, sucking and licking, glorying in the broken gasps coming from him. She brought him all the way inside of her mouth again and again. His cock throbbed in the warm, slick grip of her palm as she stroked up and down.

  When she pulled away and glanced up, he moved swiftly, lifting her in his arms and setting her on the kitchen counter. The tiled counter was cool against her skin, its contrast notching the heat higher inside. He slid his hands up her calves, the calloused surface sending shivers through her. He pressed her knees apart and lifted his eyes to hers. The naked want in his eyes nearly took her breath away. Her chest tightened. His eyes held hers as his hands reached the juncture of her thighs. Her pulse pounded, need thrumming through her as he stroked a finger into her cleft. She was slippery with desire. He dragged his fingers through her folds before delving into her channel.

  Her head fell back on a moan, and she gripped the edge of the counter. Pleasure tightened its coil inside, streaks of heat whipping through her. His mouth joined his fingers, and he set to drive her mad with a slow exploration of her folds while his fingers surged in and out of her at a steady pace. Shudders began to roll through her, the ache of pleasure so intense, she scrambled to cling to the edge of sanity. A deep thrust of his fingers at the exact moment he swirled his tongue across her clit, and she cried out. Pleasure raced through her in deep ripples. His touch eased, and he pulled away. His lips made their way up her body. She was nearly limp in the aftermath of her climax. His touch coaxed her body back to a state of taut need. He teased her nipples, dragging his fingers in lazy circles around them on the heels of his wet kisses. He nipped, stroked and kissed his way up her neck. The rough scrape of his stubble ignited tiny fires under the surface of her skin. She felt him fumble in his jeans and heard the tear of foil.

  His thumb traced her lips. Her name was a gruff command. She dragged her eyes open and was instantly lost in the blue blur of his gaze. Fire and understanding were in his eyes. Sweet electricity sizzled in the air around them. Her breath ran away from her. He cupped his hands around her hips, dragging her closer to the edge of the counter. He dragged the head of his cock back and forth through her drenched folds. Again and again, his hard shaft slid across the center of her desire until she was frantic for him to fill her. She curled her legs around his hips and arched against him. He finally surged into her, fast and hard. He gave her all she wanted and more as he pounded into her. Long, hard, deep strokes sent her spinning tighter and tighter inside. Pressure gathered and she chased after more, spurring him on as she flexed against him.

  Her breath broke when he slid his hand between them and stroked her clit. This orgasm started from the echoes of her last. Pleasure spun loose, wracking her body in deep waves. His cry joined hers as he drummed his hips into hers. Her head fell into the curve of his neck. She struggled to catch her breath. Her legs slowly loosened and fell to hang by his hips. They were still joined. His hand stroked through her hair, slowly untangling it.

  Chapter 22

  Becca lay still, simply letting herself relax for a moment. They’d shared a shower and collapsed in her bed a while ago. It was still not quite nine in the morning yet. Though her body had been humming madly, she’d fallen asleep in Aidan’s arms for a little while. What couldn’t have been much more than an hour of sleep was more restful than any sleep she’d had since she’d left Seattle. It has nothing to do with Seattle, and everything to do with Aidan. Her mind taunted her, and she smiled wryly. So true, and she damn well knew it. Her mind started to climb on its well-worn path of rumination and worry, but she swatted it back.

  Aidan had followed her up here to make sure she knew he wouldn’t go quietly. A part of her reared up and wante
d to tell him to get the hell out of her life. But that was a habit born out of defenses, defenses that had served her well for years. Another part of her wanted to relax, but she didn’t know how. Aidan said he’d wanted her for years. The idea any man would long for her was so foreign, she couldn’t quite believe it. Yet, her pesky, hopeful heart so desperately wanted to believe it. She’d done such a thorough job of putting that corner of her heart out of commission, it was rusty and underused, but way too enthusiastic. Hope nearly galloped in circles inside.

  Aidan’s hand stroked down her side, coming to rest on her hip. His touch was warm and sure. She took a breath, trying to gather herself. She rolled over to face him. His hand naturally adjusted, sliding with her turn onto the low curve of her abdomen. His dark curls were rumpled. His thick lashes curled against his cheeks. The angled planes of his face were softer in sleep. She lifted her hand and traced the blade of his nose, wondering about the miniscule jog along the bridge. His eyes slowly opened.

  “When did you break your nose?” she asked.

  He eyed her sleepily and shook his head subtly, as if to nudge the sleep away. “Probably not as exciting as you might think. I broke it when I was ten. Fell off my bike. My face got up close and personal with the sidewalk.”

  She giggled. “Oh. I guess I figured you broke it when you were on a mission or something.”

  The corner of his mouth hooked in a half smile. “That would make a better story, but no.”

  His body tightened in a shivering stretch against hers. “I suppose we could get up,” he said gruffly before dipping his head and catching her lips in a kiss.

  When he pulled away, she opened her eyes again. For a moment, she was held in his gaze. A rush of intimacy washed through her. She wanted the moment to simply keep going. To feel wanted, to feel known and understood, and to feel this close to him was so comforting, she couldn’t stop the hope unfurling in her heart, its wings beating loudly. Restless and uncomfortable with the need rushing through her, she kicked the covers off and sat up abruptly.

  A while later, she was saved from her worrying over how to explain Aidan’s sudden appearance when they entered the restaurant and Gage approached, casually clapping Aidan on the back. He appeared entirely unconcerned about Aidan’s presence at her side.

  “Hey man, how was the flight?”

  “Slept through most of it. How’re things going here?”

  “Busy. I’m about to head out for some errands in town. How about we meet tonight for dinner and drinks?”

  At Aidan’s nod, Gage turned to her. “You too? Marley should be around.”

  Becca managed a nod and tried to read Gage’s expression. If he was curious about her and Aidan, he masked it well. His expression was bland, but then Gage was the master of not letting his thoughts show. She realized Gage was waiting for her reply. “Sure.”

  Gage moved on, pausing at a few tables to chat with customers as he made his way through the restaurant. She and Aidan got in line by the breakfast buffet. After they were seated, Aidan immediately dug into his food. He’d stacked his plate high with just about everything on the buffet. A waitress came by and served them with coffee. After a few fortifying sips, she finally asked the question practically burning a hole in her brain.

  “Did Gage know you were coming up here?”

  Aidan looked up from his food, his blue eyes clear and direct. “Yup. Figured there’d be more questions if I didn’t let him know I’d be showing up.”

  Even though Becca had already told Garrett and Delia about her and Aidan, she wasn’t so sure how she felt about Gage knowing anything about it. Yet, she didn’t know how she could hide it. With Aidan here, she either had to put on the act of her life, or get over it and be okay that her family would know something was going on with them.

  Even though it went against her grain, she knew it would be silly to try to pretend. She swallowed her pride and looked across the table at him. “Oh, okay.” That’s all she could muster at the moment. She was saved from further worry about what to say next when Marley’s friend, Ginger Sanders, came walking up to their booth. Ginger’s stride was confident, conveying the bold personality she had. She was a witty, caring, and blunt friend. Her shiny brown hair swung around her shoulders and her blue eyes were bright.

  Once she reached them, Ginger leaned down to give Becca a quick hug. “Hey Becca! Marley mentioned you were here for a bit. How’s it going?” Ginger’s sharp eyes shifted to Aidan, assessing and questioning. “Aidan, right? We met at Delia and Garrett’s wedding.”

  Aidan met her curious gaze head on and nodded. “Sure did. Nice to see you again.” He paused and took a sip of coffee.

  Ginger’s eyes swung back to Becca, and Becca could see the questions brimming there. She may not have known Ginger too long from her visits up here, but she already knew Ginger was inherently curious and would most definitely be wondering what was up between Becca and Aidan. Becca flushed slightly, but ignored it.

  “Want to join us?” she asked. “Assuming you’re here for breakfast, that is.”

  Ginger nodded. “It’s the weekend. Of course I’m here for breakfast,” she said. “I’ll grab some food and be right back.”

  Ginger made her way to the buffet and returned moments later. Breakfast passed uneventfully. Aidan excused himself to return to the room to check emails and handle some work. As soon as he was out of earshot, Ginger’s gaze zeroed in on Becca.

  “Okay, what’s going on with you two?”

  Becca felt the heat run up her neck and face. She took a breath and forced herself to answer. “I guess we’re kind of seeing each other.”

  “Kind of?”

  Oh geez. Ginger wasn’t one to accept vague. Becca much preferred vague, but she knew it wasn’t helping her navigate the muddle of her own feelings. She couldn’t bring herself to sort through the emotional tangle she was in with those closest to her because it only heightened the vulnerability running under the surface of every moment lately. Even if Ginger wouldn’t let her dodge, it was somehow easier to talk with her. Becca took another breath. “It’s only been a few weeks. I don’t know what’s going to happen.”

  “Well, he’s got it bad for you. I know that look, and that’s a man in love,” Ginger said firmly.

  Becca’s stomach somersaulted. “Huh?”

  Ginger grinned and took a gulp of coffee. “Figured you were clueless. Okay, that might’ve been a bit harsh. Let me say it another way. You seem like maybe you’re not used to this whole relationship thing.”

  Though Becca wanted to squirm in her seat, she swallowed her pride and nodded. Because she was good and lost here. “If you want to know the truth, I haven’t even dated anyone for three years, not since I found my ex getting a blow job from one of my bridesmaids just days before we were supposed to get married,” she said bluntly. Funny, but there was no pain left from saying aloud what happened. She figured that was a good thing. All she had left was the tinge of bitterness and a massive lack of trust in love.

  Ginger didn’t flinch. Her eyes softened with understanding, an understanding that couldn’t have come from nowhere. She shook her head slowly. “Damn. That sucks.”

  Becca smiled wryly. “You can say that again. You look like you might have some idea how it feels.”

  Ginger shrugged. “Maybe. For me, it was after the wedding. I married my college sweetheart too soon to figure out he had the most wandering of wandering eyes. I thought he was just a flirt. I finally wised up and dumped him, but it got ugly. Pain is relative, so I’m not sure if it’s better to get bitter before or after you get married. I totally get the whole swearing off relationships thing. That’s what I did. It works for me.” Her words were matter of fact.

  Becca took Ginger’s words in and realized she wanted to tell her it wasn’t worth it to swear off relationships. Ginger was a vibrant, intelligent, strong and beautiful woman. The idea she would cut herself off in that way seemed…limiting. Not that B
ecca thought everyone should be with someone, but it shouldn’t be a choice driven by fear. She recalled a small suggestion a therapist offered her in the months after her engagement blew up. To try to tell herself what she would tell a friend in a similar situation. She wanted to tell Ginger not to rule out any chances. Perhaps she needed to consider her own advice.

  She met Ginger’s eyes. “So if it works for you, why are you trying to convince me Aidan looks like a man in love?”

  Ginger’s eyes widened. “Wow, call me out then.” She chuckled and shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I like to see a happy ending. Just because I didn’t get mine doesn’t mean I don’t want it for everyone else. Plus, I haven’t completely sworn off relationships, but you should try dating in this town. It’s not exactly easy. I’ve either known most of the men here forever, or they’re tourists I won’t ever see again,” she said with a wry smile.

  Becca started laughing just as Marley approached the booth and slid in beside Ginger. Marley looked between them. “What’s so funny?”

  “Dating in Diamond Creek,” Ginger deadpanned, sending Becca into another spate of laughter.

  Marley rolled her eyes. “You’re always on everyone, so don’t you dare give up on yourself.” Her tone was warm and sly, but stern.

  Ginger returned the eye roll. “You know how hard it is to meet anyone around here. The only reason you got lucky is Gage hadn’t been here for like twenty years. Plus, we’re not talking about me. We’re talking about the fact Aidan is gaga over Becca, and she needs to figure out what to do about it.”