A Matter Of Trust

by Sherrilyn Polf

  “I’ll see you tomorrow for lunch?” he asked simply.

  “Tomorrow is Saturday.” She grinned.

  “Really?” He thought for a moment, then asked, “May I come by Sunday afternoon? I really need to work at the lab tomorrow.”

  She nodded. Happily, he opened the door, leaned over and brushed his lips softly across her cheek, and then closed the door. Dena stood completely still, willing time to do as well. The door opened as Stuart came in.

  “Dena,” he asked, almost bumping into her. “You okay? I saw Clay at the bus stop.”

  She nodded and walked back to the sunroom. Now why did I come back here? Her eyes settled on the two letters lying on the couch. She picked them up, along with her books and headed for her room. Thank you, LORD. I’m not thinking properly, am I? Time—that’s what she needed—time to let what just happened, soak in. Clay had actually kissed her! Gently touching her lips, her mouth curved softly at the corners—their first real kiss. Closing the door, she stood with her back against it, dreaming. Her afternoon was absolutely wonderful. Sighing, Dena strolled to the bed. She sat down and picked up Brock’s letter.

  ***

  April, 1940

  Dear Sis,

  It’s so good to hear from you. So you’ve been suffering with cold weather too? I still don’t think it can be as cold as it is here. Dad said he and Grant had to buy hay to feed to the cattle. They’ve brought all the animals into the lower pastures so they can get feed to them. I don’t think that I ever recollect a worse winter. Dad says it has been decades, whatever that means. I’m ready for warm weather. Are you having nice days yet?

  How are your classes? Will you finish this spring? You should finish with two classes if I’m figuring right. I have one more year. So far I’ve passed everything. Finals will be next.

  You didn’t say who this guy is. I know there’s a guy. I can read it between the lines. I suppose he’s an engineer. Are you serious, or is it just friendship? Big brother wants to know. When will you be in Colorado? I’ll go home the third of May. Although I’ll miss Anne, I can’t wait to see you.

  Your big brother,

  Brock

  ***

  Dena decided to tell Brock about Clay—but not the rest of her family yet. She opened Susan’s letter.

  ***

  April, 1940

  Dear Dena,

  Just seven weeks until my wedding. Oh, Dena, I’m so happy. Mother and I’ve been working on our home (Grant’s and mine) when the weathers been nice. We’re making curtains, slip covers for the furniture, and a new comforter for our bed. It’s blue. Yes, silly, Grant loves blue.

  Thank you for asking Stuart. It’s a great relief to know he will take our pictures. Who knows, someday when he’s famous, we can proudly say he took our wedding pictures. When are you coming? May twenty-sixth? I had hoped you would be here for Grant’s and my graduation on the sixteenth. Who’s Mary? I’m so glad Aunt Doreen, Uncle Walter, and Emily are coming. Ooh. I think I’m babbling. So much is happening this May and June I seem to be going in circles. I just can’t wait until you get here. I have so much to tell you.

  Love

  Susan

  ***

  Even though Sunday afternoon seemed to take forever, it came before Dena was ready. She had dressed and re-dressed several times. She had even called Emily to her room for another opinion. Hers seemed to be too critical. Finally she settled on a beige sweater and a chocolate brown mid-calf-length skirt and boots.

  Emily, what do you think?” Dena twirled slowly, watching Emily.

  “Well…” Emily deliberated, hesitating momentarily. The doorbell rang. Dena jumped. She wrinkled her nose as she studied the image in the mirror.

  “I guess it’ll have to do.” Dena dismissed Emily and the mirrored image staring back at her. Relieved, Emily blinked quickly several times. She was glad she didn’t have to give an answer. She trailed Dena downstairs. She didn’t know what all the fuss was about. So what if some of the guys were coming over for a while. Of course Dena knew Emily was almost as glad to see Floyd as she was to see Clay.

  “Hello Clay, Floyd, Carl, and Margaret.” Aunt Doreen said. “It’s a lovely day? Maybe you could go to the garden.”

  Carl had brought Margaret? Imagine that. Emily looked at her, rolling her eyes. Dena smiled. She guessed Carl must like her company since he hadn’t gone to Virginia. Yet, he seemed to be seeing a lot of her. She slowly followed Emily down the stairs wondering if Clay would go to the garden.

  “Hello.” Clay smiled, his eyes focused on Dena. “Carl and Floyd are okay with our coming to the wedding later traveling to Virginia with Professor Miles. We talked to Professor Miles yesterday. And well, he was surprised yet pleased we were all going together. Are you sure it’s okay with your sister?” Clay asked, taking her hand as they walked to the garden area. “Do you think Mrs. Miles will mind if we tag along?”

  “Will Mrs. Miles mind what?” Aunt Doreen asked, looking up at Dena and Clay. She had gone to the sunroom to read a book after she had welcomed them.

  “I’ve asked Clay, Carl, and Floyd to stop off and attend Susan’s wedding. They can travel with Uncle Walter and you on to Virginia. Is it okay if they go with us? Mary will be traveling with us, too.”

  “You’ve talked to Professor Miles?” Aunt Doreen asked.

  “Yes, ma’am, Carl talked to him yesterday,” he answered.

  “We’re planning on leaving Friday, May the twenty-fourth, and arrive in Colorado the twenty-sixth, at the latest. I’m buying our tickets no later than the first week of May. You may go with me or purchase your tickets on your own,” Aunt Doreen said in a matter-of-fact tone. She closed her book, stood, then smiled. “It’ll be good to travel together.”

  “Thank you, ma’am,” Clay replied. Aware that Aunt Doreen had politely dismissed them when she left the room Dena and Clay headed for their corner and sat down. Clay looked serious, wanting to talk privately. He glanced quickly toward the hallway before he spoke softly.

  “I scheduled flight time for the fourth. I thought we could go flying around ten and then have lunch together at the marina,” he told her. It occurred to him she may need to know what to wear. Not sure how to say it, Clay just blurted out, “I like your dark green slacks if you want to wear them. And you should bring a light jacket.”

  She had packed the dark green slacks away for the summer. They were a heavy cotton material. But if he really liked them, she would wear them. Besides it had a matching jacket. She had a great looking cream blouse to wear with it. Dena relaxed and smiled.

  “What?” Clay asked, questioning her smile. Dena didn’t realize how carefully he watched her. She guessed she should be more mindful. She knew it didn’t matter because he really cared about her. Dena shouldn’t have to look at Clay. She could almost hear him grin when he spoke. Finally she looked up directly into his eyes.

  “Clay, I don’t know if I’ll pass my aeronautics class.” Dena said trying to change the subject, but Clay wouldn’t be put off. He wanted to talk about them.

  “Do you know how much I enjoyed kissing you the other day?” Clay leaned over and whispered. Dena nodded ever so slightly. She raised her hand to touch his cheek. Instead he took her hand in his.

  “Don’t … I … I want to …” he said hoarsely, his voice trailing off. He seemed ill at ease with her so near. There was something in the way he spoke that caused her to let him raise her hand to his lips. She closed her eyes, allowing the ripple to flow over her. But when she opened her eyes and spotted Polly coming through the dining room with a tray of refreshments. She removed her hand.

  “Clay, do you know in July I’ll have been in California for a year?” she said brightly, laying her folded hands in her lap. Her eyes pleaded with him to take the cue.

  “Refreshments anyone?” Polly placed the tray on a small table. Clay sat back, exhaled rather nervously, all the while not taking his eyes off Dena. He knew now that she had seen the
cook enter the room. Carl and the others came in from the garden laughing. Carl must have said something funny. Margaret seemed to hang on his every word. Dena wondered if Carl felt the same or if the relationship was one sided.

  After having something to eat, Carl said he and Margaret should leave. Dena knew Clay should go too but, she lagged behind permitting Clay to hold her hand while they walked. Clay pulled her into the parlor, put his arms around her and kissed her. No one seemed to miss them. Even if they had, Dena wasn’t sure she would’ve cared. She nearly fell backwards when Clay turned her loose. His kiss had left her limp and unsteady. She felt loved and surprised. She definitely knew she needed time to sort out that new feeling.

  “See you tomorrow,” he said in a gruff voice. Then he was gone.

  Chapter Sixteen

  April 30, 1940

  Tuesday

  It was the last day of her first year of college. Dena had passed both drafting and her first semester of aeronautics. She was glad Clay had kept their Monday dates, but as usual, he couldn’t get free on any other days. Today he was in the lab, so she went home to do her laundry. Boarding the bus, Dena took a seat near the front.

  Carl had graduated the previous Thursday and even though he had said he wouldn’t go through the ceremonies, he did happily. Aunt Doreen gave a small party for Carl, and the whole gang helped him celebrate. As far as she could tell, Carl enjoyed the attention. She had sat off to the side of the room and watched him josh with everyone meekly taking their kidding. It was a new side of him—humility.

  Slowly her thoughts shifted to her and Clay’s date. It was only four days until she would go sky bound with him. Dena liked that term sky bound. It was like driving or riding. After everything she had learned about aviation in class, she just knew she would like it. Dena stared out the bus window at the early spring flowers, fidgeting ever so slightly. Even though she looked forward to flying, uneasiness prevailed. Of course, the very best thing about the flying was she would be with Clay.

  I’m glad classes are over and I won’t have to study until fall. Wow, that sounds far off, but in reality it’s only eight months away. What’ll I do next fall? Sighing, she sat daydreaming about Susan’s upcoming wedding day and going home, and Clay.

  After getting off the bus, Dena looked around for Emily. She hadn’t seen her since morning. What was it that Emily had said after class? She needed to go to the Library. Are she and Floyd meeting? Emily didn’t need to study since the semester was over. The telephone was ringing as she opened the door. She ran to answer it. But whoever it was had already hung up. She returned to the hallway to check the mail. Clay had told her earlier he had enough credits to graduate the coming December. Why does he want to graduate so quickly?

  Hoping for a letter from Brock, Dena looked closely at the top envelope. She had seen it somewhere before. She glanced at the return address. It was from Bill. Aunt Doreen would tell them at dinner what Bill had written. Dena gently laid it on top of the stack before checking the next letter. Dena smiled. It was from Brock, and the third from Susan. She rushed up to her room and dropped on her bed and ripped open her brother’s letter. It had been a long day, and she was tired. She first skimmed the letter before she reread the pages more slowly.

  ***

  April, 1940

  Dear Sis,

  This is a habit I hope we never break. I’ve truly enjoyed hearing from you on a regular basis. I must admit though, when I received your first letter, I dreaded answering it knowing that I must keep an ongoing correspondence with a sister I thought I knew and didn’t really like. But it has been delightful, especially on my end. And, yes, I knew there had to be a boy, an engineer. Wow. Anne and I had this bet. I won. Anne said that a girl didn’t need a boyfriend to be interested in certain courses. Look at her for example. I said that I knew you and a boy was involved. I won. Anne had to buy me lunch.

  Seriously, I know you took the course because Emily asked you to. So be it. Anne won too. I took her to lunch. I’m not dumb. You say Clay is coming to the wedding along with some other engineers? No, I won’t embarrass you in front of Mother and Dad. But I’ll check him out, for he must live up to my standards. You know big brother standards.

  Really, sis, if he’s the one and he’ll make you happy as Grant makes Susan, and then go for it. Only you have to live in Colorado. I never thought distance would make a difference, but it does. I miss my sisters. I’ll see you at the wedding.

  Your loving brother,

  Brock

  ***

  Dena sat for a long time holding Brock’s letter. She intently stared at the wall seeing nothing. Tears dropped. Her mind was back in her childhood, remembering a different Brock, recalling all the dumb tricks he had pulled on her.

  Naturally she understood what he meant when he said “not really liking you.” She could count all of the times she felt like she hated him.

  Dena tucked his current letter in with all the others and closed the small nightstand drawer. She then opened Susan’s. Susan seemed to write no matter how busy she was.

  ***

  April, 1940

  Dear Dena,

  I can’t believe I’ll be graduating in two weeks. It’s a day I never thought would come. I’ll no longer be a schoolgirl but a “woman.” Can you believe that? The house is finished down to my clothes. Grant is already staying there. He says it already feels like home because so much of me is there. It just lacks me. Is he not sweet?

  Who are these male friends you’ve invited to my wedding? Should I be concerned? No, I don’t mind. I’m sure if they are yours and Emily’s friends they are special. Thanks for the warning.

  Mother said any friend of yours is always welcome. She trusts your good judgment. The church ladies gave Grant and me a wedding shower last week. We received some nice items for our new home. I can’t wait to show you.

  I only have five weeks left before I become Grant’s wife. Five weeks. I don’t know how people do this waiting thing.

  That’s why I’m glad that you’ll be here, dear sister. You can keep me sane. I love you.

  Susan

  ***

  A wedding gift—what can I get them? She hadn’t thought about a gift, probably because she hadn’t gone to too many weddings. Maybe she should ask. She decided to go down early for dinner. Maybe she could help set the table and ask Aunt Doreen. As Dena entered the dark room, she heard weeping. Not sure what to do, she stood for a minute.

  “Aunt Doreen?” Dena spoke softly, switching on the light.

  “Oh, Dena, forgive me. I’m so silly.” She smiled, covering her eyes to hide her tears. “These are happy tears. Bill’s back in the States.”

  “Really?” She slipped into the chair. “Where is he?”

  “At San Diego in some dental school, I think he said.” She wiped her eyes. “I guess I didn’t realize how much his being overseas bothered me.”

  Dena had known. So did everyone in the household. It showed when each letter arrived and read. Aunt Doreen would get nervous and turn white, among other things.

  “After we’ve eaten, I’ll read the letter to you,” she spoke in a whisper.

  “Is Bill a close nephew to you and Uncle Walter? Really,

  Aunt Doreen, I don’t remember him,” Dena said, hoping she had said it right.

  “Not really. His family didn’t visit much. The distance made it hard. But, we’ve been able to keep in touch through letters. Walter and my brother, Tom, have stayed close. And well, I think that’s why Bill came to California. He lived with us for six months before he joined the service.

  I imagine it was natural for him to start writing his uncle. As I said, Bill is my nephew, but he’s closer to Walter. We’ve both grown to love him as our own.”

  “Oh,” was all Dena said. She did utter a short prayer. Polly came in with the dinnerware and started putting out the place settings. Dena rose to help.

  Throughout the evening meal, Dena glanced at the cr
umpled envelope which lay next to Aunt Doreen’s water glass. Stuart eyed the letter also. Emily ignored the letter. It’s funny how we all handle situations differently. Dena studied her cousins then considered her reaction.

  “Mother, is that a letter from Bill?” Stuart asked.

  “Yes.” Aunt Doreen picked up Bill’s letter, smiling slightly. “It’s a happy letter. Listen …”

  ***

  April 1, 1940

  Dear Uncle Walter and all,

  “Well you see where I am now. San Diego, California. I’m back in the United States for a while. I arrived here last Thursday with sudden orders from the Bureau of Medicine Surgery.

  They had run short of dental technicians, so they looked up all pharmacist mates with enough time to do etc. up at the hospital at Mare Island and asked us to volunteer to come down here to take the course at the dental clinic, and none of us would volunteer so the Bureau drafted us for the course. Our captain was just as sore about it as we were and even sent back a letter asking to not bother us. And if you knew how the dental corps was

  looked upon by the general medical service you sure wouldn’t have blamed us for not wanting it. It sure threw us for a loss and has played the devil with my morale. I feel like working for a “kick out.”

  The course here lasts ten weeks, starting April 20, and when I finish the darn thing the LORD only knows where they’ll transfer me to then. So of course I intend to make a few weekend trips up your way. They tell me it would be useless to try to flunk out because they won’t flunk you. That was what a medical officer up at Mare Island told me to do as a good friendly suggestion. He also told me that the next time he saw me he wanted to see me out of that so and so dental corps.

  And say, Uncle Walter, if they don’t get my pay accounts down here in time for next pay day, which is the fifteenth, could you loan me about $20.00? But don’t send a cent first unless they do fail to get my pay accounts here by then because if they do I won’t need it. They so often do fail to get your pay accounts to you on time for payday when they transfer you.