Man to Woman

by Jane Futa

  We walked back towards John car and he opened the trunk. Inside was a duffle bag full of ladies’ clothes. “Why the hell do you ride around with this?” I asked him.

  “In case I forget something. I keep one of everything in here.” He reached in and pulled out a pair of panties and some stockings. Then he dug deeper for the matching cloak that would help me blend in. I clenched my fists and exhaled.

  “Ok. Let’s do this.”

  He threw the thick fabric around me and tied it in front of my neck. He kept a lookout for any so-called church members while I adjusted to my new uniform. I couldn’t believe John had gotten into such a weird cult. And here I was about to join him.

  Chapter 3

  The sun was far from setting but you’d think it was already nightfall due to the thick woods. Only skinny slivers of sunlight passed through the dense canopy of pine branches. I walked slowly behind John toward the front of the church, quickly falling behind. Before he stepped inside, he turned back toward me and urged me with his eyes to hurry up.

  One of the other church goers bumped into my shoulder and I had to quickly grasp my cloak to keep it from revealing my boy clothes. I clenched the hood with one hand and the middle part with the other. Then I ducked my head and followed John inside.

  It looked nothing like I had imagined a cult to look. The pews had been gutted out and were leaning against the inside walls. I had expected candles for lighting, but instead there were delicate chandeliers. Everyone sat in chairs that formed a half circle, except for a tall, busty girl who stood in the center.

  She was the sexiest woman I’d ever seen. It suddenly dawned on me why all these men would join her religion. She had thick, wavy red hair that complimented her forest green cloak beautifully. Her breasts pushed past the opening of the green velvet and were trying to escape her very sheer, ruffled blouse. Her eyes were piercing and blue, and she noticed me instantly.

  “Shit,” said John. “Duck your head.” I ducked, but I looked out through the tops of my eyes to gaze at her body a little longer. Her legs were slender and toned. She wore a short, navy blue skirt that looked as if it barely covered her ass. If only she would remove her cloak so I could see…

  John found us a few empty spots in the second row of half-moon seating. I slouched in my chair, trying not to be noticed too much by the strange woman. It was painfully obvious why John came here every day instead of looking at porn. She was everything that sexual fantasies were made of.

  “That’s Rene,” whispered John.

  “I figured.”

  Rene waited for everyone to be seated before starting her sermon, or whatever the hell it was. She spouted a few new age type lines, such as, “Live in the present moment,” and, “Our misery comes from comparison.” I mostly rolled my eyes between the moments of picturing how she’d look on my bed naked with her legs spread apart.

  Then she changed the pace. “Who here is ready to be anointed?” she asked. Everyone’s hands rose except mine. She noticed, her eyes darting quickly to me. Yet she didn’t say anything. She picked John and he turned to me with an excited smile.

  “Oh my god! She never picks me!” He turned back toward her and rushed to the center of the room.

  “Remove your cloak!” she said while untying the knot around his neck. I watched in horror as he revealed his sissy outfit to the room of boys. Along with his black skirt and black stockings, I noticed he was wearing a silk pink corset. It squeezed his chest so tight that it gave him a tiny hint of cleavage even though he didn’t have breasts. I noticed the other men licked their lips hungrily as they gazed upon my best friend.

  What the hell is happening? I wondered. Meanwhile, I couldn’t stop staring at the sexy redhead. I watched my friend drop to his knees at Rene’s instruction. She pulled a small silver tube out of her pocket and removed the lid. It was then that I saw it was a bright red lipstick. She twirled the base of the silver cylinder and pressed it to John’s lips.

  She lined his lips delicately before putting the tube back in her pocket. Then she pulled out a mascara wand and brushed it against his lashes. It was as if he was some sort of pet being groomed by her. The strangest part of it to me was watching how much he seemed to be enjoying himself.

  I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned back in my chair. What the fuck is wrong with him? Why does this make him so happy? Then I noticed a small brief case beside Rene’s feet. She reached for it, opened it and pulled out the most realistic looking dildo I’d ever seen.

  I covered my mouth with my hand. I couldn’t believe what I had gotten myself into. I couldn’t believe what John had gotten himself into. Rene leaned over him with the dildo and she tugged gently on his chin. Every guy in the room was on the edge of the seats, practically swooning over the sight before them. Half of them seemed turned on and the other half seemed jealous. I wasn’t sure which disturbed me more.

  John’s bright red lips parted and his eyelashes fluttered as she lowered the head of the cock into his mouth. He stuck out his tongue for her to lay flat against it. She pushed the dildo in slowly and he sucked in his cheeks, pulling the fake flesh toward the back of his throat. I could tell when it reached as far as it would go because his nostrils flared suddenly, but the redhead pushed deeper.

  His eyes widened as he tried to take in more of the fake cock. She pushed in until he couldn’t take anymore and then she pulled it out slowly. She leaned down and gave him a kiss on the forehead. Then she grabbed his neck in one hand and shoved the cock back in.

  He took it in further and deeper. His nostrils flared more and his breathing grew heavy. My eyes traveled down his little sissy body until I saw his erection through his tiny black skirt. You’ve got to be kidding me, I thought. I couldn’t believe he was enjoying this much less letting it make him hard, but the more I saw, the more turned on I got.

  This is insane. My body stiffened and I felt sweat form above my brow. My cock was throbbing but I ignored it. There is no way this sick little show is going to turn me on. But looking at my best friend sucking that cock, I’d never wanted to be with anyone more.

  I shoved down every strange feeling that tried to surface. I couldn’t think my best friend was hot. I wasn’t gay or anything. But what did it make me? He partly looked like a girl, but he was still a boy. I couldn’t entertain the thoughts for two seconds without feeling dizzy with confusion.

  He sucked the cock harder until Rene had the entire length of it in his mouth. She was still holding his neck, her thumb gently brushing his cheek. She cooed as she fucked his face with her fake cock and some of the guys in the circle were touching themselves.

  I counted at least five men jerking it to the scene before them. It was the strangest thing I’d ever been witness to. Rene pushed the cock in deeper and deeper until John exploded with pleasure. I saw a white pool of come forming between his legs. He hadn’t even been touched and Rene made him orgasm in front of everyone.

  She removed the cock slowly and told him he was a good boy. She patted his head and then leaned her large breasts over his face. He grabbed them in his hands as his reward for being good, and then she sent him back to his seat.

  When he saw me it was as if he’d forgotten I was there the entire time. He picked up his cloak and blushed on his way over. I tried to talk to him when he sat down, but he ignored me.

  Rene continued with another spiritual type sermon about accepting yourself and living fearlessly. It started to sound more like song lyrics than a religion, but the fact that she had so many young men ready to do unspeakable acts confused the hell out of me.

  When we left the church, I tried to give John the cloak back but he wouldn’t say a word to me. I watched him get in his car and drive off, leaving me with a strange emptiness.

  Chapter 4

  I went home that night and couldn’t get the strange image of John in lingerie out of my head. No matter what I did to distract myself, I kept thinking of how he looked sucking that fake cock. I pictured his cheeks
sucked in and the red lipstick that Rene had decorated with him. I saw his eyelashes batting flirtatiously as he swallowed more and more of that hard cock.

  I closed my eyes and stretched my arms above my head, feeling them sink deep into my pillow. The moon was full and its light poured in through my window, stretching far across my sheets. I pictured Rene leaning over my friend with big, full breasts. I saw her cleavage hovering above his cleavage. I chuckled at the thought of him even having cleavage. The laughing stopped when my cock hardened.

  My eyes shot wide open. I brought my arms back to my side, sliding them slowly under the covers. I couldn’t believe that a few days before, John and I had been playing games and watching porn like usual. He used to be as cynical and lonely as I was. Now that he wasn’t, it was like I didn’t recognize him.

  Of course the skirt and the corset didn’t help much. And those stockings! I imagined my hand sliding up his long, slender, nylon covered thigh. I remembered his hard cock trying to peek out through his skirt. I remembered the white come spilling down to the floor in front of a room full of guys.

  A thought suddenly occurred to me. What were the rest of them wearing underneath their cloaks? John had told me the cloak was to hide that I wasn’t dressed the same. Were they all wearing lingerie?

  The thought of the room being filled with sissies made my body tense in a painfully pleasurable way. My back tightened and pushed my ass deeper into the bed. My cock was growing harder but I denied it as long as I could. Maybe it was just something I ate, I told myself.

  I twisted my body and turned in the sheets. I clenched my eyes shut, trying as hard as possible to sleep. The pleasant rest I longed for evaded me, though. Every time my lids dropped, an image of cross-dressers entered my mind. I saw John in his pink corset. I saw Rene, dipping the cock in and out of his mouth. I saw her holding his neck and kissing his forehead. I saw a cultish room of sissies watching, and I saw a few of them tugging on their cocks underneath their cloaks.

  As much as I wanted to deny it, it was the hottest thing I’d ever seen. It was better than any porn I’d ever watched with John. I couldn’t keep my hands at my sides any longer. They quickly slid into my boxers and pulled out my hard cock.

  I’d touched myself a million times before that night, but it had never felt so intense. The simple brushing of my fingers against the underside to my shaft sent a tingle through my entire body. I wrapped my hand tightly around my stiff dick and stroked.

  I slid my hand up and down at the same rhythm that John had sucked that fake cock. I imagined myself in Rene’s position. I imagined John sucking my dick while he wore his little lingerie.

  Then I imagined coming all over his made up face. I imagined the room watching eagerly as I humiliated him. He blushed, but he liked it.

  I picked John up by the shoulders and turned his back toward me. I lifted his skirt and ripped down his panties. Then I imagined bending him over and shoving my cock up his ass.

  “That’s a good little slut,” I whispered to myself as I tugged on my cock. “This is what you get for dressing like a little whore.”

  I felt my cock tighten and grow in my hand until the tip exploded the biggest load of come onto my bed sheets. My legs quivered and I lay there in awe, trying to catch my breath.

  Why the hell did that turn me on? A million thoughts raced through my mind. Does this make me gay? Do I like John? Do I like sissy men? I couldn’t linger on a thought long enough to even tease it. Eventually, I thought myself into the deepest sleep I’d had in a while.

  I woke up next to my come stain with the sunlight pouring through my window. I shielded my eyes and stretched in the innocence of forgetfulness. Then I remembered what I’d done the day before and the images I jacked off to.

  Nobody knew, and yet I felt utterly humiliated. I was twisted up with guilt. I wanted my best friend back, but at what cost? I sat up in bed and saw the cloak from the day before draped over a chair in the corner.

  I can’t go back. This whole thing is too weird. Yet I felt the fabric calling to me. I spent the entire morning living in my normal routine; breakfast, coffee, some gaming. But I always managed to find a minute or two to go back to the bedroom and stare at the ominous cloak.

  I ran my hand along the soft velvet and bit my lower lip. I picked it up, spun it around behind me and fastened it near my neck. My fingers grasped the hood and slid it over my head. I walked to my full length mirror which leaned at an angle in the corner of my room. I closed the middle slit of the cloak so I couldn’t see what I was wearing underneath.

  Then I closed my eyes until my reflection was blurred slightly. I imagined I was wearing a corset and a little skirt. My cock hardened instantly.

  Chapter 5

  Against my better judgment, I decided to return to the cult. Part of me still wanted to help get John out of it, and part of me was curious. I tried to stuff down the feelings of curiosity that kept arising but they were relentless. The only way I could live with myself was to keep repeating, “This is for John.”

  Even John, however, was a loose reason. After all, John was constantly shifting in my mind now. I couldn’t even depend on my image of him. Who was I really saving and did he want to be saved? I’d never seen John happier, even amidst total humiliation. Still, I couldn’t help but think that it wasn’t really John. It was sissy John, or whatever he’d prefer to be called.

  It was as if Rene had single handedly transformed every male in that cult. The more I thought about it, the more I wondered if it really even was a cult. Everyone seemed to be there of their own free will and they left with smiles on their faces. Maybe they were all in love with her and that made them happy enough.

  In fact, I couldn’t remember a time when I’d seen a group of guys commune together around a single woman like that. She was the hottest thing any of us had ever seen and yet no one seemed to be fighting each other for her. They all let her lead to the point of embarrassment. It seemed as if they would do anything for her.

  I couldn’t deny that I was somewhat under her spell, too. Maybe that was the real reason I wanted to go back to the cult. Rene wasn’t just beautiful, but utterly intriguing. She seemed mystical in a way. She appeared to be otherworldly. Despite how she seemed, she was still just a mere human. She was a hot woman we should all be trying to fuck. Instead, everyone let her fuck them. They let her dress them up like sissies. All for what? It wasn’t like they got to bang her in the end.

  Yet here I was, pulling my car up outside of the old church, watching the churchgoers go inside. I sucked in my breath and stepped out of the car, careful to keep my cloak from showing my boy clothing underneath. It was strange to be in a place where the typically accepted gender was not acceptable. I still had no idea what would happen if they discovered my cargo shorts and t shirt.

  I walked slowly up the path toward the church. I didn’t see John’s car there yet and told myself there was still time to turn back, but I didn’t want to. Even if John didn’t show, my curiosity had a hold on me. I couldn’t deny it any longer. My desire to explore the cult further was the real reason I had returned.

  I found a seat in the half circle of chairs and waited impatiently for the room to fill with followers. One by one they came in and picked their chair. Rene was nowhere to be seen yet. I watched the door eagerly for him to appear. I needed him to show and be my excuse for attending. Otherwise I’d have to face the reality that I wanted to know more about this sissy cult and see why they all followed Rene to such lengths.

  Every man was silent as they waited for Rene. Moments later, she appeared from a back hallway and walked toward the center of the half circle. Her eyes darted to me instantly, piercing through me. She lifted her chin slightly as if she was willing my cloak to drop to the floor. I was fearful and clenched my cloak tighter to my body.

  “Welcome back, stranger,” she called across the room. Suddenly, all eyes turned toward me. I weakly waved my hand and tried to smile. I knew I must’ve looked incredibly
nervous because my waving hand was shaking. “Where is your friend?”

  “I don’t know,” I said, my voice cracking under the pressure. I heard the slamming of heels as someone ran in quickly from the front. Everyone shifted to look behind them and I saw John darting in as quickly as his feet could carry him.

  “Sorry!” he called, rushing to the only empty seat left. He was nowhere near me and I felt incredibly isolated with him so far away.

  “That’s alright,” she said. Rene turned her attention back to me.

  “Is this a friend of yours?” she asked him. I watched John nod his head, but his eyes looked at me warily.

  “Greg just wanted to see what all of this was about,” he said, trying to defend me.

  “Greg? Hmm…” she said, twirling a strand of hair in her fingers. “Greg? If you would be so kind as to join me in the center, here.” She swiftly gestured her hand to the spot beside her. I stood up and started walking, ignoring John’s shaking head.

  I don’t know why I walked up to Rene. I don’t know why I didn’t run as fast as I could out of the church. I was curious, sure, but something else was fueling me. Something else made me feel fearless.

  Desperation. I was empty and lonely and desperate to feel fulfilled. Every other guy from town had found their happiness here, why couldn’t I? I wanted to know what it felt like to be happy. I wanted to know what it felt like to love someone so much you would do anything for them. I wanted to know what it was like to be one of Rene’s many pets.

  I stood beside Rene, inches from her soft, warm skin. I was close enough that her breath trailed across my cheek and her floral perfume swirled inside my nostrils. I inhaled as I looked at the room around me. There were mischievous grins on all the faces except for John’s. I wondered what they knew that I didn’t.

  “Drop your cloak,” said Rene. I looked to her with a worried expression. “Drop it or I’ll drop it for you.”