Graveyard Uprisings

by Jason Paul Rice

  I’m guessing my father had asked them for magical powers to defeat me. He was probably still in control of his own mind, but only until his wish was granted.

  Ernesto said, “You are making a big mistake if you refuse this offer. The Sendals are taking over the city, whether anyone likes it or not. The train is leaving the station; either you are on it, or you are going to get run over. There is no in-between option. Life or death is before you.”

  “I never liked binary choices. What about option C? How about I kill all you men in black creatures and then move on to the stone men? After I kill each and every one of you, I’ll move on to the Sendals and systematically shred through them, keeping the city safe from random killings. How does that one sound to you two?”

  Ernesto shook his head in disgust. “You are going to be very sorry. The Sendals have been nice to you so far.”

  I laughed so hard that if I were drinking coffee, it would have just shot out of my nose. “Sending a spirit, my father, a stone man and you two bozos to kill me does sound quite generous. Whatever do they do to people they don’t like?”

  Victor revealed an ugly grin. “That is my point. Your father is going to torture you for years before he kills you. He made a deal with the spirits and that deal will be upheld. Might as well be written in stone. There is only one way to change that now.”

  “How do I change something that’s been written in stone?”

  Ernesto held up a fist and made a smashing motion. “You break the stone. Are you willing to break the stone or are you going to die like the rest?”

  “We’re all going to die at some point. I’m not joining the Sendals. Look, I’m freezing, so I thank you for stopping by. Another great get together with you fellas. A pleasure as always.” I felt the level of magic increasing, so I readied a fireball.

  Victor held up a hand with his white handkerchief. “No need. You can put that away. We are just preparing ourselves to go back outside where you never know what you will encounter. Please note that you have chosen death, and there is no going back from here. We will give you one last chance to join the Sendal Spirits and defeat your father. What will it be?”

  “Get the fuck out of my office,” I said, pushing them out the door.

  “Death it shall be,” Ernesto uttered on his way out the door. “We’ll be sure to let the spirits know.”

  “Let’s get out of this shit hole,” Victor said, and spat on my floor before storming out the front door.

  That jerk had a lot of nerve calling my office a hole after seeing he lived in a rat’s nest. I closed up shop and went home as the dusky burnt orange horizon mingled with the foggy peak of Montrose Hill.

  Two men sprang out of a car parked in front of my house and I drew my magic out of the reservoir. I built a fire from within when I noticed it was Timson and Roydell, the ridiculously named vampires.

  Energy surged through my chest, running to my shoulder and racing down my arm. Roydell (I thought it was Roydell) held up his hands and said, “We come in peace bearing gifts.”

  His partner was carrying something under a sheet or a covering of some sort. The vamps walked up onto my porch like they owned the place, so I followed them up the stairs. I said, “Not to be smart, but give me the gift and get out of here. It’s not good for my reputation or business to be hanging out with vampires.”

  Timson said, “We understand. Jonathan has sent us to present you with a very generous gift.”

  Roydell added, “He must like you. He doesn’t even give stuff like this out to us.”

  Now I was more than intrigued, but also ready to have a heart attack. If Carolyn walked out that front door, death would follow. For whom, I’m not exactly sure and don’t want to find out. It wouldn’t make sense for her to do it, but the way this week was going, all possibilities were open.

  I held out my hand. “Just give it to me then.”

  Roydell looked around. “It’s better if we come inside. I would hate for it to get dirty out here.”

  “You guys aren’t coming in my house. That’s just not happening.”

  Timson asked in a calm manner, “Why not? You’ve been in our house as an esteemed guest numerous times.”

  I said, “Yes. Upon invitation. It’s not that I don’t trust you two specifically, it’s just that I don’t trust anybody. And this whole secretive gift under a blanket reeks of a classic set up. I’m young, but I’ve puttered around the block a few times.”

  Roydell explained, “I understand how you could interpret this as shady, but I can assure you that we are only here on Jonathan’s behalf. If we came on our own accord, there would be blood on the streets right now. I won’t pretend that we like you, but for some reason Jonathan does.”

  “And he’s your master.”

  Timson said, “He’s our elder. Respect means something among our clan. Apparently, that is something you have yet to learn. Jonathan demanded that we deliver it inside your house or he would have to—deal with us accordingly.”

  “I think I’d rather see you guys piss off Jonathan. How would he know you didn’t deliver it inside my house?”

  Both men just stared at me in silence. Oh yeah, the telekinesis. I told them, “I will personally tell Jonathan that you brought it into my house. Now let me see it, the suspense is killing me.” The constant concern was making my chest buzz in anticipation and discomfort.

  The two vamps wouldn’t budge from their position of coming in the house. We had one hell of a Mexican stand off going on. Perhaps a staring contest to decide the winner. First to blink loses. I didn’t care if they staked out my house for the next week, these jokers weren’t coming inside.

  “Fine. I’ll call Jonathan and tell him about the situation.” Ernesto decided to throw down the trump card.

  Son of a bitch. It was like calling dad. Not my degenerate dad, but a good one that would demand answers and accountability. My heart pumped, about to explode out of my ribcage. I said, “Either of you even look at my dog in a suspect way, I’ll kill both of you.”

  My wavering hand pulled the house key out of my pants and scratched around the slot before finally achieving insertion. Worry streaked through my shaking arms as I pushed against the door, opening it only a crack.

  25

  I clenched my teeth, peeked at my empty couches, and let the two vampires in.

  I let out a silent sigh of relief as Colossus ran up to me, barking at my guests. Both men turned to each other, and Roydell (I think) said, “Say Timson, are you detecting what I am?”

  I knew that was Roydell. His counterpart said, “I sure am. Who have you had in here?”

  I picked up Colossus. “Don’t worry about who I’m hanging out with. Give me the gift and get the hell out of here.”

  Roydell said, “We still might need to take a quick look around, but first, feast your eyes on this.”

  Timson pulled the cover away and tears rushed to my eyes, but never escaped my eyelids. It was--beautiful.

  I stared at Mother and Child by Pablo Picasso, circa 1921. Since I had lost my mother when I was ten, this painting had special meaning for me.

  I almost forgot about the dangerous situation in which Carolyn could stroll down those steps at any time. “Alright gentlemen. Tell Jonathan I said thank you and I’ll give him a call tomorrow.”

  Timson twirled his long mustache. “Do you mind if I use your bathroom?”

  “Yes I do. You can piss on the sidewalk if you have to go that bad.” What are these jokers up to?

  “It’s worse than that.” He grabbed his belly.

  I shook my head. “Then you can shit on the sidewalk. Sorry boys, but the home tour is over. You remember where the front door is.”

  Timson put his foot up on my coffee table and hunched over, pretending to be in discomfort. “Why so anxious to rid yourself of our presence? I will only be a few moments in your bathroom, I promise.”

  I kicked his foot off my table and the vamp pirouetted on his heel, spinning in a co
mplete circle, and lowering his foot back to the ground. Graceful.

  Sounds came from my back porch. Turning to see Reg approaching the back door with Carolyn right behind him, panic streaked through my system. Timson started to walk up my stairs before I took three steps toward him, grabbed his long coat and held him back. “Now you’ve pissed me off.”

  I yanked him down, reached out with my empty hand, and opened the front door.

  I pushed him out and turned to Roydell as I heard the key sliding into the back door. The vampire said, “We will tell Jonathan about this. You can be sure about that.”

  I pulled my phone out of my pocket. “Not if I tell him the story first. Get out.”

  I shoved Roydell out and slammed the door as the back door swung open and Carolyn pushed Reg through the jamb. I put my index finger over my lips and had a crazed look in my eyes as I charged into the kitchen. Luckily, the unlikely lovebirds heeded my warning and quieted down.

  I went back to the living room and peeked out the window to make sure the vampires were really leaving. Check.

  Jonathan answered on the fifth or sixth ring. “Hello, how did you like the gift?”

  “Jonathan, thank you. It’s amazing. I’m blown away by your generosity. I can’t thank you enough.”

  The elder spoke calmly, “Hopefully, we can bury the hatchet now.”

  “For the most part, but your delivery men were rude and accusatory to me in my own house. Things got out of hand at your place last time, but that wasn’t on my accord. If you had been cornered like I was, you would have done the same.”

  He said, “I understand. Some men are too aggressive. They think it breeds an air of confidence when in reality it’s only false bravado. Two men are about to fight. One is talking non-stop and the other is quiet. Take the silent assassin every time.”

  “I’m with you on that. Maybe you could put a scare into the fellas for not upholding the ideals of proper etiquette. I have to run, but thank you a million times over. You really shouldn’t have done this.”

  He said, “It was my pleasure.” He hung up the phone and I did the same.

  No. He really shouldn’t have done this. I now felt indebted to the vampire, which wasn’t a good place to be. The painting was priceless to me and I would never sell it. Here’s hoping he wouldn’t hold it over my head.

  Time was running out. Without Felix’s help, I’d like to wait for the showdown but the Sendals are getting too much power. And now, they are coming after me since I turned down the offer to join them. They got my father, but I have morals, much to their dismay.

  I still needed Jonathan to help trap the escaped spirits back into those Dybbuk Boxes. Hopefully, that would occur before I have to go to war with the spirits, but the clock was ticking. The unexpected visit from the Men in Black ramped up the pressure level, but I didn’t care.

  That meant it would probably be me, Reg, Felix and Carolyn against an army of Stone Men, Men in Black, Sendals Spirits and my father. That didn’t seem like a fair fight, but I wasn’t backing down. I needed to stop my father before he killed again.

  At this point, I was just waiting on the word from the Red Cavern of demons about the whereabouts of the Spirits. Then, it’s time for some action. As long as there aren’t any more surprises, I should be fine.

  I went into the kitchen. “That was close. If you two had come in that door a minute sooner, it would have been ugly up in here. Roydell and Timson are a couple of jagoffs.” Jagoff had quickly become one of my favorite Pittsburgh terms.

  Carolyn’s happy face shifted to sudden anger. “They are the worst. I hope they come back.” She blew on her killer nails.

  I warned her, “If they do come back, we take it outside. I can’t have my apartment getting wrecked like my office is right now. Reg, you’re rocking the Steelers polka-style scarf today. Styling and profiling over there.”

  “You talking noise?” He lowered one eye brow.

  “I am not. I like it. What are you guys up to?”

  Carolyn spoke for the couple, “Not much. Just got finished having some fun. Why do you have that crazy look in your eyes right now?”

  I rambled with excitement, “Because I’ve pretty much figured it out. The Sendals are controlling my father, the men in black and the stone men that are rising up from the graves. I just need to find out where they are hiding out and we go to battle. You two ready?”

  Reg’s eyes lit up. “You know I am. Been practicing up a storm lately.”

  Carolyn agreed, “I’m always ready for a good scrap. I’ve just got to be careful I don’t draw any more attention to your party.”

  I said, “I completely understand. You two should see the weapons I got.”

  I pulled my runed arsenal out and introduced them to my friends. Then I showed and told (good old show and tell) them about the tattoos. I was proud to have been marked by the Gods.

  After all my bragging, Carolyn said, “I’m going to jump in the shower. Is that all right?”

  I nodded. “Sure. I’m pretty sure we have some clean towels left in that closet in the hall.”

  “I’ll be fine,” she said, kissed Reg on the cheek, and went upstairs.

  I turned to Reg. “Don’t get too attached, big fella. She’s leaving in a week.”

  He grinned and lowered his head. “Just having fun. Why don’t you sit down so we can talk for a little bit?”

  I sat down on the couch and wondered what this could be about. I got a strange feeling Reg was going to follow Carolyn to her mystery destination. “What’s up, man?”

  “So you know that I’m an old man. I told you how the doctor’s saying things haven’t been looking that good for me lately. About that—I got something to show you. It’s easier than telling you.” He removed his scarf to expose two fang marks.

  My heart dropped into my shoe. “She infected you. I’ll send her back to the Purple House for betraying you, Reg. Or maybe I’ll go upstairs right now and kill her myself.”

  Reg grabbed me by the arm. “Relax, it’s nothing like that at all.”

  I didn’t quite understand. “Then what could it be? During sex? When you were sleeping?”

  Reg relinquished his hawkish grip and lowered his head again. “I asked her to do it.”

  I really didn’t understand. “What? Why would you do that?”

  “I just told you. I was coming to the end of the line. Immortality is a pretty sweet deal compared to having a chat with the Grim Reaper.” He flashed a toothy smile. No fangs hanging from his dentures.

  Tears welled up in my eyes and my breathing became erratic. “Yeah but, you have to join a clan now. I mean, you’re one of them now. No offense.” I felt like someone just kicked me in the heart and stole my best friend.

  He announced, “I’m probably going to go talk to the Purple Clan.”

  I warned him, “You can’t do that. What are you going to say? Hey I’ve been hanging out with that person whom you want to kill more than anyone. Is it cool if I stay here, by the way?”

  Reg rolled his eyes. “Ha ha. No. I was planning to make you look good in the process. I’m gonna tell them that you asked me to keep an eye out for the girl and I found her. I’ll say that I tried to bring her back alive, but she got to me and infected me before I could do anything about it.”

  That was very honorable. “You’re just a sanguinarian right now, but I’m not sure I can still trust you around my dog and girlfriend anymore. We not going to get to hang out very much if you do this. What am I talking about, you’ve already done it. I’m not mad, Reg. I completely understand why you would do this. I’m just sad. You’re my best fucking friend, Reg.” I leaned down and hugged him.

  He tapped me on the shoulder with a firm fist. “Let’s cool it with the girlie stuff. I’ll be running with a new crowd, but we can still get together to wreck shop whenever you want. I’m still a free man, even though I will have a certain loyalty.”

  “You tell Ronald?” I laughed.

  Re
g shook his head with a smile on his face. “Not yet. Not sure what to tell him. He won’t believe me if I tell him the truth. Can’t say as I blame him. Not every day that your father announces he’s a vampire. Now I will have access to a lot of supernatural information that goes around the city. You know I’ll never hold out on you.”

  I said, “I wish I could say the same, but you know me too well. I have trouble trusting vampires.”

  Reg gave me a friendly punch to the chest. “I got a feeling I will be able to change your mind on that. Ha ha. We’re still gonna be friends, we just won’t see each other as much.”

  I wanted to know, “Do you feel different?”

  He nodded in confirmation. “Yep. Feeling some crazy urges I’ve never felt before. We been drinking each other’s blood for the past two days. I crave it now. It’s like an animal is running around inside me. I’m quicker too.” His giant hand streaked toward my face, stopping a quarter-inch from contact. It was lightning quick.

  He continued, “It’s definitely different, feeling that vampire blood running through me. And I can feel it that’s for sure.”

  I pounded my fist on the kitchen table, scaring my dog. “Damn man. The end of an era. Who the hell am I going to hang out with now?”

  Reg said, “Come on, young blood. I been slowing you down for the past few years. I know we got along well, but it’s time for you to find a crew closer to your own age.”

  I supposed he was right. “Considering my other best friend is a thousand-year-old faerie, I don’t really like people my own age. But I do see what you are saying. Going to the vamps, you’re going to be considered a young man. Hell, Jonathan is six hundred.” I laughed.

  He scratched his salt-and-pepper goatee. “Yeah, I’m just a little nervous. I don’t know if the Purple House is wheelchair accessible. Ha ha.”

  “I’m sure you’ll be fine.”