All or Nothing: A Trust No One Novel

by Dixie Lee Brown

  The same aura of power and control she first sensed in the casino hung over him now and, unexpectedly, some of her apprehension dropped away.

  Slowly, she approached until she leaned against the car beside him. “Did you and Murphy come to an agreement?”

  “Yep, we’re doing it my way.” He looked sideways at her. “It’s the best plan.”

  “I know.”

  He raised an eyebrow and a hint of a smile tugged at his mouth. “If you know, why were you so set on doing it Murphy’s way?”

  Cara shrugged.

  He chuckled, shaking his head. “Can we go now?”

  “Where’s this ranch of yours?”

  “Kalispell, Montana. It’s not really a ranch. No horses or cows, but you’ll be safe there.”

  Cara faced him for a moment and forced her eyes to meet his. “I should probably thank you… for saving my life.”

  “Just don’t make me sorry.” His tone was gruff, but his eyes twinkled with humor.

  “No promises.” A grin hid her certainty he would indeed regret helping her before this was finished.

  Saturday, 2:04 pm

  ONCE IN THE air, the cockpit of Joe’s Cessna Citation closed in around her, and the proximity of his body made Cara tense and claustrophobic. In the last ten minutes, she’d thought of a dozen reasons why this was a bad idea… not her worst bad idea, but bad just the same. She desperately needed to get up and move around. Surely she’d self-destruct if she didn’t get off this plane. As she opened her mouth, ready to say “take me home,” his hand touched her arm.

  “Afraid to fly?”

  “Not usually.”

  “I suppose that means you don’t trust my piloting ability either?” A frown creased his forehead.

  She held her breath a moment. “Do you mind if I ask you a question?” Her voice shook.

  He glanced her way, his gaze dropping to her hands.

  She crossed her arms, tucking her trembling fingers from sight.

  “Ask me anything.”

  “I thought maybe, if I knew you a little better, it might be… good.” Perfect. She couldn’t even talk around this man.

  “Can’t hurt.” He smiled encouragingly.

  “How did you get into… killing people?” Cara clamped her lips closed. She didn’t mean to say that. What was wrong with her? She snuck a peek at him.

  He stared straight ahead out the window, giving no indication what he was thinking or how inappropriate he’d found her question.

  She chewed her lower lip and waited. As the silence stretched, however, she lifted her chin defiantly. She wouldn’t apologize. It might not have been a politically correct question, but it wasn’t unfair under the circumstances.

  He turned slowly and met her eyes. “I could ask you the same damn thing.”

  His cold glare hit her like a physical blow, sending her back in time to that night on the beach. Her world spun as she fought to rid herself of the images of the man she’d shot. She’d tried so hard to block out the memory—just for a while, until… what? Until she could accept that her brother was a murderer and a gunrunner and he’d tried to kill her. God, wasn’t that enough?

  She could see the man, as though he still stood in front of her. Dark suit, light-colored shirt, blood spreading from the wound in his chest to his abdomen and soaking through the waistband of his slacks. The drizzly, damp air of the coast lay on her skin, the ocean roared in her ears, and the cold, hard steel was gripped tightly in her hand.

  It took a moment before she realized the waves roaring in her ears were really her breathing, gasping, sucking air in and out of her chest, and still she couldn’t get enough. The next instant, Joe’s arm was around her shoulders and he pulled an oxygen mask over her nose and mouth.

  “Breathe. In and out. Regular breaths. That’s it. That’s better.” He continued to talk her calmly through the attack. A few minutes later, he slowly removed the mask.

  “Touché.” Her voice wavered. “I’m sorry. That was…”

  “When I was young and naive, I signed up for a tour in Afghanistan. I had no idea what I’d gotten myself into, but once you’re there, you catch on or they send you home in a body bag. I was lucky… good at staying alive, and keeping those around me alive too. I guess I thought I was making a difference. So, I re-upped and went wherever they needed me.” He turned to look at her, his gaze sweeping her face, his eyes full of concern. “When my third tour was up, and I was still alive, I figured I better get the hell out of there while I still had my skin. I came home and got a nice, quiet job with the Secret Service, protecting the president’s family.”

  “That’s impressive.”

  “Trust me. It’s not. In fact, it’s about as boring and tedious a job as you can imagine: except for the occasional intense adrenaline highs, just often enough to keep you on your toes. That’s when I met Murphy, and he talked me into training a couple of his undercover operatives in my spare time.”

  “What kind of training?”

  “The kind you only learn in the field, against scum who have no moral code and who place absolutely no value on human life. I taught my students how to survive, how to kill and any other techniques Uncle Sam deemed appropriate. Still do.” He paused, watching her.

  Cara waited, dreading. “Go on.”

  “It was about time for my rotation off the protection detail, and I knew Murphy wanted me to train full-time.” Joe shrugged. “I’m really a hands-on kind of guy. It wouldn’t take long for that to get old, so I quit and went out on my own. Started my own training facility. Turns out there are plenty of government and law enforcement agencies that need my expertise. I can be selective about who I train and get paid a hell of a lot more than Murphy wanted to shell out. Plus, I contract my services to a few handpicked agencies, which gets me out in the field enough I don’t get bored.”

  Joe’s story, though brief, wasn’t what she’d expected. That he worked for government and law enforcement reassured her somewhat. At least he’d come by his dangerous skills honestly. She admired his dedication and desire to make a difference. There was more than one side to this man. Perhaps she’d misjudged him.

  “So, the first family didn’t die or go missing on your watch?” Her lips curved in a teasing grin.

  The intensity in his expression made her breath catch. “I’m good at what I do. No one gets hurt on my watch.”

  His eyes held hers until she forced herself to look away, searching for another topic. “Do you have family?”

  “My parents live in Arizona. I talk to them at Christmas, but that’s about it.”

  She frowned. Sounded like her and her father. No need to dwell on that.

  “Siblings?”

  “Only child.”

  “Wife? Kids?”

  “No.”

  “Girlfriend?”

  “As a rule, women have a problem with my profession and the lifestyle that goes with it.”

  “Uh-huh, but you didn’t answer my question.”

  Joe’s expression went blank. Then he scowled and, for a moment, pain reflected in his eyes. “I was engaged once.”

  “Get cold feet?”

  He continued as though she hadn’t spoken. “Her name was Jenny. We grew up together. When I went off to Afghanistan, she decided to do something equally foolish. She became a U.S. Deputy Marshal. A week before our wedding, she took a bullet protecting some sleazeball witness in a racketeering trial. Died instantly.”

  “I’m so sorry, Joe.” Cara groaned. She shouldn’t have let it get so personal. Why didn’t he just tell her to mind her own business? If only she could take away the hurt caused by her careless probing. He stared out the window for so long she felt compelled to reach out and touch his arm.

  He shrugged his broad shoulders as though shaking off the bad memories. “Ancient history. Now it’s my turn.” He rushed on without waiting for her to agree. “How did you get hooked up with David Dennelli?”

  “No, that’s not open for disc
ussion.” She turned away from him. “Pick a different topic.”

  “I answered all your questions, and some of them were pretty damn hard. You owe me.” He touched her chin and turned her back from the window to face him.

  “I don’t want to talk about him.”

  “What’s the big deal? If you get some of that off your chest, Dennelli won’t have all the power anymore. Any shrink will tell you that.”

  Was that possible? Could the specter of David be banished just by giving voice to his cruelty? She watched Joe, not sure she believed him. Not sure how much she should tell.

  “Not to mention, it would go a long ways toward eliminating our trust issues.” He smiled. “Talking about this could catapult us right up to friend status.”

  In spite of herself, she laughed. “Let’s not get carried away.”

  He grasped her hand comfortably in his. Even as the warmth of his touch reassured her, she stared at him in surprise. For the first time since they’d met, the walls she’d built around herself began to crack, and she wasn’t entirely sure that was a good thing.

  “Okay, but you drive, or fly, or whatever it is you do. I don’t want to see your face, and I especially don’t want to see you feeling sorry for me.”

  “You got it.” He saluted and turned to face the front.

  Cara was glad he kept her hand tucked within his. She needed his strength and warmth. Even with it, cold settled in her heart.

  “I met David at Oregon State four years ago. He was a journalism student on the debate team and spent most of his time studying, alone. I was just the opposite. College was a time for me to kick up my heels and experience the life I thought I’d missed out on. If there was a party, I was there. A sporting event of any kind, I was in the front row. David didn’t even like sports.

  “We met in a bar one night and hit it off. We both liked to have a few beers. That’s about the only thing we had in common. God, he was different back then.” Cara stopped to swallow the lump in her throat. “I fell in love. I could be the poster child for the Love Is Blind campaign, but deep down I knew there was something wrong. He never wanted to go anywhere with my friends or meet my family. After a while, he didn’t want me to spend time with them either. He said if I really loved him, I didn’t need anyone else. I thought he just wanted to spend more time alone with me… that maybe he was a little intimidated by my hard-partying friends. Anyway, that’s what I told myself.

  “Then my friends stopped calling, and things went from bad to worse. David got upset if I wasn’t home when he called or if I was late meeting him. I convinced myself he was just worried about me. How could I have been so stupid?” She turned away, swiping impatiently at the angry tears that rolled down her cheeks.

  Joe squeezed her hand. “Don’t beat yourself up. You didn’t know. When you’re close to someone, it’s hard. He didn’t want your friends around because they might have had enough pull to make you see what he was doing. He didn’t want you getting away before he sprang his trap.” Joe’s voice was calm and soothing, not a hint of condemnation.

  “The thing is, I really loved him. I rationalized every awful thing he did and then excused him for it. How sick is that?”

  “You can’t blame yourself, Cara. These jerks… they’ve got it down to an art. You might have seen only what you wanted to see, but he’s the one who lied and cheated… and worse, unless I miss my guess. Did you know about his family?”

  “He told me his father had ties to the Chicago Mafia and was into prostitution and drugs. The whole thing made him sick, and he didn’t have anything to do with his family anymore. That’s what he said, and I believed him. There was no reason not to. Then he asked me to marry him and told me his family wanted us to have the wedding at their estate. He said if we did, they’d be satisfied, and then we could go away and lead the lives we wanted.

  “So, we got married there, moved onto the estate that very day… and never left. When I objected, he got mad. It wasn’t long before he started hitting me.” Cara paused, deciding how much of the story to leave out. “Six months after the wedding, he broke my wrist and three ribs, and I ended up in the hospital. I called the cops, but they wouldn’t do anything. They were afraid of him too.”

  “His family probably paid them off.”

  “I left him, but… he forced me to go home. From then on, my life was hell. I did everything I could think of to keep from making him angry, but he’d have a few drinks or a bad day, and… I lost track of the number of times I tried to run. There was no one I could turn to for help. He always found me, and he always made sure I was sorry.” Tears ran down her face.

  “I’ve got an empty shoulder here, if you want. Doesn’t mean I’m feeling sorry.” He tugged on her hand and patted his shoulder.

  Cara laughed, a choking sound. She wiped her face and stared out the window at the blue sky and the Rocky Mountain range below until she regained control.

  “What about your brother? Did you ask him for help?” A slight edge to his voice made her glance at him.

  “Brian would have done anything for me. At least, that’s what I thought, but I didn’t want him going up against David. He said he couldn’t stand doing nothing, so he signed me up for self-defense classes. That just got me in more trouble. The next time David hit me, I broke his little finger.” Her voice cracked, and she paused.

  “That’s when he cut you?” Joe’s voice contained anger.

  She nodded. “That’s when I made up my mind I’d kill him. Brian talked me out of it, and he went to see David. I don’t know what was said, but David agreed to an uncontested divorce as long as all I took was the clothes on my back. I never really believed he’d let me go. Not alive anyway. So, when the threatening notes and phone calls started, I wasn’t really surprised. I’ve spent the last six months looking over my shoulder. I’m sure he gets some kind of perverse pleasure out of knowing I’m always afraid. So far he’s kept his distance, and I’ve tried to get on with my life. I got an apartment, and things were going pretty well… until you came along.” Again she laughed, hoping to lighten the mood.

  Joe sat stiffly, one hand holding hers a little too hard, the other white-knuckled on the controls. His jaw was set in a hard line.

  “You’re not feeling sorry for me, are you?”

  He took a deep breath and his gaze locked on hers. “Men like Dennelli shouldn’t take up space on the planet. I’m going to fix that.” He turned to face the front again. “We’re still about an hour out. You should try to sleep.” He placed her hand in her lap.

  Cara stared at him in shock. What just happened? He couldn’t be serious. “Promise me you won’t get involved with David.” Panic bled through into her voice, but she didn’t care. She hadn’t told him her life story so he could fix things. It had nothing to do with him. How dare he change the subject? Did he think she’d go blindly along with anything he said? She wouldn’t let Joe, or anyone else, get hurt because of her.

  He stared straight ahead, but a muscle in his jaw ticked.

  “You don’t understand how dangerous he is. He won’t hesitate to kill you.”

  “Your lack of faith in me is somewhat disturbing.”

  “Please, Joe, promise me.”

  “I promise he’ll be sorry he ever laid a hand on you.”

  “Damn it. This is my problem. I’ll take care of it.”

  “Like you’ve taken care of it up till now?”

  His scornful laugh stunned Cara. What in the hell did he expect? She’d done everything she could to get out of that relationship. She didn’t tell him half, never would, what she suffered for her futile attempts to flee. Most days she was just grateful to be alive.

  “You bastard. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I won’t get the job done, but at least no one else will die in my place.”

  “Why are you so eager to commit suicide?” He shook his head. “I swear you’re the most stubborn woman I’ve ever met.”

  “Well, lucky for you, I won’t be around l
ong.” She stiffened her spine and glared at him.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means I’m going home as soon as we land.” It was a lie, of course. She couldn’t go home, but she’d find someplace to hide where her presence wasn’t a threat to anyone, including this stranger with a God complex who apparently thought he could solve all her problems.

  He swore softly, and a strained silence engulfed the cockpit. Evidently, he was done talking. Cara frowned and turned to the window. She’d made the right decision. No more confessions. No more trust. She’d allowed the tiniest crack to form in her armor, and it had blown up in her face. She’d find someplace where she could be alone. He’d be relieved with her gone, and she certainly didn’t need him. Suddenly, loneliness renewed its icy grip on her heart and stole her strength. She took a deep breath, hoping the jerk beside her wouldn’t notice the way she trembled.

  “You’re not leaving, Cara.” His harsh words broke the silence.

  She looked at him in disbelief. “Seriously? You think you can keep me here against my will?”

  “I was hoping you’d enjoy the hospitality of my home, but if you prefer house arrest, I can arrange that.”

  “Uh-oh! Careful, Joe. Your true colors are showing. You’re not so different from David after all.”

  For an instant, pain flickered in his eyes, but he blinked it away and assumed a scornful expression. “Didn’t I tell you?” A mirthless smile twisted his lips. “I’m ten times worse than Dennelli.”

  Chapter Seven

  * * *

  Saturday, 5:05 pm

  THE SUN DIPPED below the horizon, and shadows swallowed the small airstrip in the Flathead Valley. Goose bumps formed as they drew closer to their cold and inhospitable destination. Joe landed with only a couple of bumps marring an otherwise perfect maneuver. Cara looked out the cockpit window. A black and silver Hummer, its lights on, parked next to the single hangar. The hangar doors were open and the building was lit from within. A bit of warmth chinked away at her anxiety, but it wasn’t enough. It was only a mirage of welcome.