by Vicki Green
“Mornin’, darlin’.” Colby walks in carrying a tray. He brings it over to the long hospital table, sets it down, and rolls it until it’s over my bed. “Wanna try sittin’ up a little?” I smile and nod eagerly. He leans down and presses a button on the rail and the back of the bed begins lifting me. “You tell me when to stop. I don’t want to hurt you.” It keeps lifting until I’m up pretty good, and I nod at him so he stops. I look at the tray, my smile never leaving. A single rose in a vase sits on the right corner. Then a bowl with a spoon, napkin, a big pitcher of ice cold water and a sack are the items before me. He leans down and kisses my mouth then starts taking things out of the sack. God, I really need to brush my teeth. As if he read my mind, he places my toothbrush and paste from home on the tray. “Thought you might want these.” He smiles, and it makes my breath hitch. He walks into the bathroom and soon returns with a small plastic container of water. “Here. Are you okay to do this or do you need help?”
“I can do it. Thank you,” I whisper, my voice still hoarse.
He leans over me again, kissing my forehead. “No need to thank me, darlin’. I’d do anythin’ for you.” He rises and I brush my teeth as I watch him remove a plastic container from the sack. My brows raise, wondering what could be in there. He turns his head, his smile so bright. He starts to remove the lid. “Sadie made you her famous chicken broth.” My eyes blink. That sounds so good. “Doc said you can start havin’ liquids today so Sadie made up a batch this mornin’. Wanted to bring it herself but I asked if I could. She’ll be here later on with Memphis and the guys.” He winks and my heart flutters. I finished brushing so he takes everything to the bathroom then comes back and pours the delicious soup in the bowl. My eyes close from the appetizing aroma. “Hey.” They open to a worried look on his face. “You okay?”
My stomach takes that moment to growl, loudly. He chuckles, and I swear that’s the best sound in the world. I’ve missed it so much. “I’m just hungry.” I giggle, sounding weird to me since my voice is so rough. It sounds like I have a really congested cold.
I must have looked like I was confused because he sits down on the mattress and takes my hand. “Doc said your voice might be like that for a few days. Said the surgery went longer than she liked and you had a tube down your throat. Does it hurt?” I shake my head and smile, placing my other hand on his face.
“You always worry about me so. Know what I’m thinking as it enters my mind. I love you,” I croak.
He moves closer until his mouth covers mine. This is what I need to make me feel better, something that no medicine can provide. “Minty,” he says against my mouth. I smile as he moves back and picks up the spoon, scooping up some broth and bringing the spoon to my lips, his other hand cupping underneath it. My mouth opens, and the best taste in the world hits my senses. I let out an incredibly loud moan, and his eyes widen and darken with the sound. “Better be careful, baby. You’re in no shape for me to do what that sound makes me wanna do to you.” I swallow hard, the warmth of the broth feeling wonderful to my throat. He pulls the spoon back and fills it then continues to feed me.
“You know, I can feed myself.” I smile as he gets another spoonful.
He chuckles, and it stirs those butterflies inside me. “Yeah, but what fun would there be with that?” He’s so breathtakingly gorgeous, inside and out. He not only takes my breath away but makes my heart pound so hard when I look at him. God not only blessed him with looks, a fantastic body but also a heart and mind of gold.
The bowl is half gone when my stomach becomes full. He puts the lid on the container and hands me a big glass of water, which I about emptied in one drink. Then he moves the tray back and climbs in bed with me, something I’ve longed for since I first opened by eyes. His arm wraps around me, and I snuggle my face into his chest, and I’m finally where I belong. I look up at him, a smile still on his full lips. “How’s Trevor? Any change?”
His smile leaves as his brows lower. “Not yet.” My heart turns heavy. I’m so worried about my friend. Yet, he’s not just my friend, he’s my family, the brother I never had but always wished for. “Not gonna lie. Sandra had hoped he’d be awake by now. Caprice is still with him, hasn’t left his side for a moment. She’s worried sick. No one can get her to eat or get any rest. She barely let Doc tend to her injuries.”
I move my fingers over his waist, rubbing as I let everything sink in. “Are they bad?”
He shakes his head. “No. Bottom lip cut, a bunch of bruising on the side of her face, a black eye. Her left arm is in a cast. The chair falling over broke several bones when she landed. But she was more shaken up than anythin’, scared. Now she’s worried to death about Trevor.”
Flashes of that night hit me hard, my body begins to shake. His arm tightens his hold around me. “He killed Dayton,” I state, knowing he knows this. He nods, and I can see a bit of wetness in his eyes. We’d gotten pretty close with Dayton. He was such a nice and caring man. Young. Too young to have lost his life so early. “Do you think Sandra would let me go see Trevor? I promise I won’t stay long?”
His hand moves to my forehead, his thumb rubbing across it, lovingly. I love when he does that, feels so good, comforting. “I dunno but I’ll ask her.” I yawn. Feeling his warmth and being in his arms, makes me so tired and so loved. I close my eyes but all I can think about is Trevor.
The spot next to me feels cool. I open my eyes and gasp when I see Mandy sitting in a chair next to the bed. The TV is on low and she’s looking up at it. “Oh, my God,” I whisper, my voice still rough and hoarse from sleep. Her head turns, and I see her beautiful smile. She stands and bends over, my arms going around her immediately. “I can’t believe you’re here!” We hug for a few minutes, not wanting to let go. Finally, she sits back down, wiping away tears from under her eyes. I find my own are wet, but my smile is huge.
“I would have been here sooner but your damned weather kept delaying my flight.” She laughs and one bursts from me too. She grows into seriousness, concern on her lovely face. God, I’ve missed her. With all that’s been going on, it’s been a few years since we’ve actually seen each other. “How are you, honey?”
“I’m good,” I tell her as my hand covers my side. “Well, better now that my nightmare is over and you’re here. It’s so good to see you.”
She looks where my hand is and then at me. “I’m relieved and I’m sure you are beyond happy it’s over. I met Colby this morning. He’s a fine looking man, Shiloh.” She wiggles her eyebrows, and I laugh. God, that feels wonderful. “I can tell how much he loves you. I’m so happy for you.”
“You got here this morning? Where have you been?” I ask feeling a little confused why she’s just now here.
Her face saddens. “I spent some time with Trevor, knowing you were resting.” My brows lower and my chin quivers a bit. “I met Caprice. Not knowing her I can still see how tired she is, how thin.”
“How is he? They haven’t let me go see him. I want to, so badly.”
“He looks like he’s just sleeping, sweetheart. When Colby and I talked, before I came into your room, he said he’s gonna track down the doctor and see if she’ll let someone take you in a wheelchair to see him.” My heart speeds up, then the door opens and Colby enters with a nurse behind him bringing in a wheelchair. I smile but inside I’m anxious yet worried about seeing him. Colby winks at me then he helps the nurse get me in the wheelchair. I smile as Mandy leans down and kisses my cheek then Colby follows us down the hall.
I’m amazed that he’s just on the other side of a big nurse’s station. I’m told that this is the ICU side but the side I was moved to doesn’t require quite as much monitoring but still needs someone to be close. I’m nervous as I’m pushed into the room, not knowing what I’ll find. As I approach his bed, I see tubes everywhere. The same kinds of machines that I had in mine are all around behind his bed. The nurse stops the chair and sets the brakes. I feel Colby’s warm breath next to my ear. “I’ll be right outside. Take you
r time,” he whispers. I nod, slightly, not wanting to take my eyes off Trevor.
I tilt my head and watch him sleep. He looks the same. Maybe his skin is a bit paler, but it’s the same eyes, the same nose and those lips that so many women have longed to kiss. My fingers move to mine, remembering when we kissed, so long ago. We both looked at each other, serious as we stared into each other’s eyes. Then we both burst out laughing, knowing our relationship was more like brother and sister. In that moment, we knew we’d be friends forever, family.
So many times he’s helped me, cared for me, and held me when I cried with fear. “I’m so sorry,” I whisper. Silence except for the low beeping of the machines. “I never meant for this to happen. Not to you. You’ve always been there for me, never asking for anything in return, never thinking of yourself. I want to see those blue eyes of yours that are so full of love and caring. And that smile.” The corner of my mouth lifts. “Those pearly whites and how it lights up your face.” I reach out and take his hand, bringing it up to my face. His skin is soft, not what you’d find on the hand of such a hard worker. It’s warm to my skin but limp in my hands. “You deserved so much better. A wife, kids. Happiness.”
I lay his hand back onto the mattress with care. Tears fall down my face as I stare at him. “You can have that now, my friend. The game is over. You helped end it. I’m so very proud of you, so thankful. I love you.” I wipe away a tear and sniffle. “Can you just come back to me now?” I look around the room. Small like mine was before. White, bland. No flowers, nothing that shows any color. I look back at him and smile sadly. “I think there’s a young girl who thinks the world of you. She hasn’t left your side until now. And she didn’t want to go. She still needs your help. She’s frightened and has no one or nothing in her life. She needs some Trevor care and your special way with people.” I sniffle again and just watch him lie there. Still. Sleeping.
I don’t know how long I’ve sat here, reminiscing of our times together. The good and the bad. The door opens, and my eyes shift when I see Colby standing beside me, looking down at Trevor, placing his hand on my shoulder. “You’ve been in here for three hours. I think you should come back and rest now, darlin’. He’ll still be here. I can bring you back later.” I nod, still not wanting to remove my eyes from Trevor. Colby unlocks the brakes and I reach out one more time, grasping Trevor’s hand, squeezing it and hoping he can feel it. Feel me. As Colby turns the chair around, I don’t let him out of my sight until I’m pushed through the door. I turn my head back, looking forward. Trevor would want me to be strong, always wanting me to defy the odds. He’d want me to live the happy life he truly always believed I deserved.
When we get back into my room, Colby helps me back into bed. I turn and see Caprice laying on the couch, sound asleep. He turns and follows my eyes then looks back at me. “Mandy’s with Trevor. I think she should sleep for a while longer. When she wakes, I’ll try to get her to eat somethin’.” I nod slowly then bring my eyes to his. “You should try to get some rest too, ya know. When Trevor wakes up, he’ll get onto you.” My mouth lifts into a small smile but I can’t stop my chin from quivering.
His brows lower. “Move over.”
He helps me move over, and then climbs into bed with me, immediately wrapping his arm around me and laying his hand on my arm that’s across his waist. He holds me tight as I rub my face into his chest. I feel comforted by his strong arms but yet scared for my friend.
As I close my eyes, one thought enters my head. The game isn’t really over yet.
Epilogue
Trevor
I lay here wonderin’ why I should open my eyes. I let them all down. I’m sure they hate me or are dead now anyway. I failed them. Failed them all. I’ve been protectin’ Shiloh longer than I can remember. Been through hell and back with her, for her. The game came to an end and instead of settin’ her free, I get shot. Twice. Now, I don’t know how it ended. Did she live or did he win?
Caprice, such a young thang, she’s been through so much. She’s beautiful, shy, and needs help in knowin’ there’s happiness out there for her. She needs to know that no matter what she’s had to endure she can still live a good life. When I saw her, I not only took pity on her, though I’d never show that, but she reminded me of someone. Someone I knew when I was young. She reminded me of her. The one person I fell in love with but couldn’t have. I’ve thought about her all my life. What happened to her? Is she happy? Does she think of me?
Then I think of Colby and how much of a friend, well, actually family, he’s become to me. He’s a good ole boy with the country way I’ve longed to get back to. He helped me purchase a farm, didn’t have to. Shiloh fell in love with him, and I couldn’t have picked a better man for her. She’s gonna have a baby. I hope she’s alive to fulfill her dreams of happiness. Colby too. Yet, I failed them and I don’t know if they are.
Dayton was sent to help protect Shiloh, make sure that madman wouldn’t end his game his way. I saw him lying on the floor, dead. My heart hurt for him. Such a fine, young man died to protect her. Such a waste of life all for the maniac and his game.
Now, I’ve always been one to respect others, help in any way, and most of all honor the beauty of the land and protect family at all cost. I guess my cost got too high this time. Guess it’s fittin’. I haven’t had that much of a life, ‘cept for Shiloh and Mandy, until I came out here, found new friends that became my family. Shiloh always wantin’ to know why I don’t care to meet a woman but respectin’ that I can’t talk about it. Truth is, since I lost her, I haven’t been able to look at another woman. I tried kissin’ Shiloh once and all that did was make us laugh. It was a good laugh because we knew we loved each other in a different way. I’ve read that some say when you find your soul-mate, your one and only, nothin’ else can replace that. Some say you can find love again and I believe that to be true but there’s still only that one person out there who is truly for you and you alone. I also believe she was taken from me when we were young, so young I wouldn’t be able to know her by looks. However, I know I’d be able to feel her. I got that sense with Caprice but that can’t be right.
So, I lie here wondering do I fight to stay alive or do I let death take me? Can’t say it’s been bad. Had several people who care about me. But I can’t leave Shiloh now unless the game didn’t end like I thought. If that madman didn’t die and he killed everyone, I have to make sure to end it. For them. Not sure what to do. Feels like Caprice is near but she don’t talk much. Wish Mandy would come by or Shiloh. I’d love to hear their voices. This could just be wishful thinkin’. They could all be dead.
Then I hear all kinds of racket and soon it’s quiet again. Don’t know what people are doin’. Then my heart beats faster when I hear Shiloh’s sweet voice. She’s alive! She won the game, thank God. Unless he got away again. I’d tear up but they don’t come. I hear her cryin’ though. What I wouldn’t give to be able to open my eyes right now, hold her in my arms and tell her I’m okay. I try. Try really hard but nothin’ happens. I feel my hand lifted but can’t feel the softness of her skin or her warmth. She thanks me but not sure I’m the one who needs to hear that. I wish I could tell her it was her who won the game and I was only there for her. She wants me to come back to her but she has Colby now. Even Memphis and Sadie are so close with her and I know they’ve become friends. She’ll hurt but I’ll be in her memories.
Soon after, Mandy comes in. It starts makin’ me frustrated that I can’t speak to her, tell her I’m here. She tells me how much she loves me. How she’d wish I’d wake up and yell at her or somethin’. That makes me wanna laugh, so bad. After she left I got to thinkin’. Am I not supposed to wake up? Is this it for me? It can’t be. I’m only twenty two, have a new spread, and have so much life to live still. I lie here, only the sounds of the machines around me to keep me company. Suddenly, I feel all alone. Maybe it is my time. Maybe I was here for that one purpose and now it’s over so it’s time for me to leave.
I hear the door creak open, the sounds of soft footsteps moving towards me, and then the chair screechin’ as it’s pulled closer. Somethin’ weird happens. They pick up my hand and I feel it. Theirs are so much smaller than mine, so much softer than mine with calloused skin from workin’. So quiet until I hear cryin’, soft, sweet. They turn my hand over and fingers begin to trace a pattern in my palm. I feel a tear drop on my arm. If I can feel, does that mean I can wake up now? I hear them snifflin’ and then sigh.
“I’ve never had much to look forward to in my life.” It’s Caprice. No wonder they were so quiet. She hasn’t said much since she’s been with us. “My family’s been gone for so long now and I’ve been alone. I don’t talk much because I’m afraid to. That man would hit me if I did.” Son of a bitch. “After three years you get used to it, especially when you’re alone, with no one to talk to anyway. I remember my parents though, never forgotten them. They used to call me Prie but that horrible man said to forget that, forget them. I had a happy life except we moved when I was only ten and I had to leave the one person I thought I couldn’t live without.” I hear a sweet sound of a giggle, and my heart beats faster. “He was everything to me and he loved me.” I hear her move and adjust in the chair. “Do you believe there’s someone out there for you? That one person who is like no other, made just for you? Maybe I’ve read too many romance stories but I believe it. He was the one and my parents took me away from him. I’m sure people would think I’m crazy, being only ten, him thirteen, and believing I’d found my soul-mate. But I’m not crazy and I know in my heart I did. Sometimes I sit and wonder what he looks like now. How much has he changed? Then again I think if he knew what has happened to me, he probably wouldn’t want me anymore anyway. I’m damaged now beyond repair.”
