Darcy and Elizabeth What If? Collection 4

by Jennifer Lang

  The journey had been long and cold and she was glad it was drawing to its close. But she was apprehensive about her reception. It was one thing for Georgiana to invite her, and for Anne to say that Mr Darcy would be glad to see her; it was another to face him, after everything they had been through, and live beneath the same roof as him for a time.

  The light was fading as the carriage approached the house, for it was late afternoon and the December dusk was falling.

  ‘I am glad we completed our journey before it fell dark,’ said Anne. ‘We will be indoors before the last light fades.’

  The carriage rolled to a halt outside the front door.

  The house did not look welcoming. When Elizabeth had visited before, it had been early summer and the warm sun had been shining down, while the air had been filled with the sweet perfume of summer blooms. Now the air was cold and there were no flambeaux shining out from the doorway, so that without the carriage lamps they would have been in the dark.

  The footman jumped down from the box and opened the door. He let down the step and Elizabeth followed Anne and her companion out of the carriage. After the long journey she felt cramped and she stretched her legs with relief. Then the three ladies approached the front door. The footman lifted the heavy knocker and its clanging sound could be heard reverberating through the house.

  The door opened and the Pemberley butler stood there. Anne greeted him warmly and he bowed a low bow, saying that she was very welcome. He then welcomed the other guests and conducted the ladies into the house.

  Once in the splendid hall the servant took their outdoor clothes and conducted them to the drawing-room. How well Elizabeth remembered it, for she had seen it on her visit to the house a few months before. She had not expected to meet Mr Darcy then, but to her surprise she had come across him, and to her further surprise he had been charming. This time she expected to meet him, but she had no idea if the meeting would go badly or well.

  As the was conducted into the drawing-room she realised that she would not yet have to meet Mr Darcy, for he was not there. Miss Darcy sat in the drawing-room alone. She jumped up when she saw her guests and ran to greet them. She kissed Anne on the cheek then curtseyed to Elizabeth, who curtseyed in response. Anne gave her companion leave to retire to her room and the three young ladies sat down together. Georgiana fulfilled her duties as hostess very well by ringing for tea and enquiring after their journey. Tea was brought in and Georgiana poured the fragrant brew, helping her guests to cakes as well as the tea.

  As they partook of the refreshments, Anne asked how Mr Darcy was and Georgiana said he seemed a little better.

  ‘Colonel Fitzwilliam arrived this morning, and he has lifted my brother’s spirits,’ said Georgiana. ‘He is still quiet and he looks worried but at least he is not brooding. He and my cousin have gone out to the home farm to examine the damage there and to see what repairs can be put in hand without too much expense.’

  Elizabeth was relieved that she was not to meet Mr Darcy at once. She was tired from the journey and she did not feel at her best. She was glad she did not have to make conversation. Even generalities were beyond her at the moment, and she was glad that Georgiana and Anne were talking about their families, giving each other their news. She knew, too, that she was not looking her best. She had travelled in a practical woolen gown which was not attractive and which was crumpled from the journey. Her hair had become disarranged when she removed her bonnet and she was conscious of one ringlet hanging askew.

  The tea went some way to refreshing her and the cake was very welcome. As the other two ladies talked she looked around the room, remembering the last time she had been there. She stood up and went over to the mantelpiece. As she did so she caught sight of a letter on the small table next to the sofa. The handwriting caught her eye and she recognized it as belonging to her sister Lydia. Thinking the letter must be for her, as she had told her family she would be spending Christmas at Pemberley, she picked it up and read it. To her horror she found that it was a begging letter, and when she looked at the direction she saw that it had been sent to Georgiana.

  She put it down instantly, but she knew its contents, and that knowledge could not be undone.

  Georgiana and Anne had by this time finished their conversation and Elizabeth said, ‘I am so sorry, but I saw your letter and, recognising my sister’s hand, I thought it must be for me. I cannot believe she is writing to you and asking for money, and it is plain that this is not the first begging letter she has sent. It is also plain that you have sent her money. Please, please do not do so again. She has no right to contact you and no right whatsoever to ask you for money. Your brother was more generous to her than she deserved when he arranged her marriage and I beg you not to listen to her pleas.’

  ‘I cannot help it,’ said Georgiana simply. ‘I was deceived by George Wickham and so I have sympathy for your sister. I nearly ran away with him, remember, and so I cannot blame her for doing the same. And now she is in difficulties and so I feel I must do what I can to help her. Only now, with things looking so uncertain, I do not think I can send her any more money. I sent it to her out of my allowance, but I no longer want to draw it. I would like to give it to my brother but he does not know I am aware of the situation. He has not told me of our difficulties himself. I only know of them because I overheard him talking.’

  ‘You must write to Lydia and tell her you can no longer help her,’ said Elizabeth. ‘You need not worry about her. She is not in hardship. She has enough money to live on, and in fact you will do her a service by refusing to send her any more money, for then she will learn to manage on what she has.’

  ‘I wish I could so as you say, but I do not know what to write,’ said Georgiana.

  ‘I will help you,’ said Elizabeth.

  ‘Thank you. It will be a weight off my mind,’ said Georgiana. ‘I only wish I could write it in my mother’s sitting-room, at her desk, but the room is damaged and the desk is completely destroyed.’

  Anne said, ‘As to that, I have a gift that might help. It is not here yet but it should be here in time for Christmas.’

  ‘That is very mysterious,’ said Georgiana. ‘May I know what it is?’

  ‘I would prefer it to be a surprise,’ said Anne.

  ‘Very well.’

  Georgiana went over to the writing desk in the corner and selected a quill. She tested the nib with her finger and then dipped it in the ink.

  ‘What should I write?’ she asked Elizabeth.

  Together, the three ladies decided on the best way of putting an end to Lydia’s importunings and between them the letter was written, with Georgiana being the scribe and the two other ladies helping her. They discussed how much Georgiana should tell her but in the end they decided that Georgiana should tell her everything, for only knowing about the fire and the home farm and the failed investments would convince Lydia that no more help would be forthcoming.

  Once the letter was written and sealed, Georgiana said, ‘I have kept you downstairs long enough. I am sure you would like to retire to your rooms so that you can rest and change before dinner.’

  She rang the bell and Mrs Reynolds, the housekeeper, appeared. She welcomed the ladies cordially, and she respectfully conducted them to their rooms. She showed Anne to her room first and then took Elizabeth along the corridor to her room.

  Elizabeth was charmed. The room was spacious with a four poster bed and rich red velvet bed hangings which matched the curtains. There was a handsome wardrobe, chest of drawers and washstand and there was a woven rug, laid over a deep carpet, on the floor.

  Mrs Reynolds said a maid would bring hot water to the room in a few minutes. She was about to leave when she suddenly stopped, turned round, and said, ‘If I may say so, Miss, I am glad to see you here. I am sure your presence will cheer the master. He spoke very highly of you after your last visit in the summer and you are very welcome.’

  ‘Thank you,’ said Elizabeth.

  The good w
ishes of such a trusted servant meant a great deal to her.

  Mrs Reynolds bowed her head and then left the room.

  Elizabeth sank down on to the bed. So she was here, and at dinner she would meet Mr Darcy. What would his reaction be? She wished she knew.

  Chapter Eight

  At that moment Mr Darcy was in the drawing-room with his sister. Colonel Fitzwilliam had retired to dress for dinner and so the two Darcys were alone.

  ‘I saw the de Bourgh carriage in the stables and on questioning the coachman I found out that Anne was here. Do you know why she has come?’ asked Mr Darcy.

  Georgiana summoned her courage and said, ‘She has come because I invited her.’

  ‘You?’ asked Mr Darcy.

  ‘Yes. I,’ said Georgiana. ‘I am the mistress of the house now and so I took it upon myself to ask her. You said I must invite anyone I pleased.’

  Mr Darcy sat down heavily on a damasked sofa.

  ‘Yes. I did. But I thought you would ask me first, or at least tell me, if you had invited a guest. I did not think you would do so in secret.’

  ‘It was not in secret!’ said Georgiana.

  ‘You did not mention it,’ he reproved her.

  ‘You have barely spoken a word to me for weeks and you no longer listen to anything I say. How could I mention it?’ she asked.

  He looked across at her and said, ‘Have I really been so distant, Georgie? If so, I am truly sorry.’

  ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘You have. But honesty compels me to say that I did not even try to mention it because I thought you might object. I knew you needed company, however, for you were downcast, and so I invited her without saying anything.’

  There was a smile playing about his lips.

  ‘How can I chastise you, when you did it for my own good?’ But then his face became serious. ‘But you should not have invited Anne without letting me know. I did her a grave wrong, Georgie, and it will be an awkward meeting.’

  He heard the sound of the door opening and looked up to see Anne standing there.

  ‘Good evening, cousin,’ she said to Mr Darcy.

  He made her a bow and returned her greeting.

  The door opened again and Colonel Fitzwilliam entered the room. He was already dressed for dinner and after they had all exchanged greetings he asked Georgiana if she had managed to finish her painting. When she said, ‘Yes,’ he asked to see it. The two of them went down to the far end of the room, where they proceeded to discuss the painting.

  Anne took a seat on one of the elegant sofas, arranging her skirts about her, and Mr Darcy flicked up the tails of his coat and sat down in a chair opposite.

  ‘I overheard your conversation with Georgiana as I entered the room, and I must speak to you about it so that there is no misunderstanding,’ said Anne, without preamble. ‘You have not done me a great wrong, Fitzwilliam, and you must not think it. I do not want you to be unhappy on my account. There is no need.’

  ‘But I jilted you,’ he said with a frown. ‘It was not well done of me.’

  ‘You did not jilt me,’ she replied firmly. ‘The betrothal was never of your making, or of mine, and I never thought you were bound by it, whatever my mother or my uncle might have thought. I was not surprised when you ended it and you must not feel you did me any harm. In fact, It is quite the opposite. You set me free.’

  She glanced unconsciously towards Colonel Fitzwilliam, who was standing with his hands behind his back as he discussed Georgiana’s painting with her. There was such love in Anne’s glance that Mr Darcy caught his breath.

  ‘Does he know?’ asked Mr Darcy.

  ‘No,’ she said, turning back to look at him. ‘And I pray you will not tell him.’

  ‘I will not,’ he assured her. ‘But I will say this. If you love him, then you must let him know, because he will not speak first. He has admired you for a long time but your fortune stands in his way. He needs to marry an heiress if he is to maintain his present lifestyle – the lifestyle of an Earl’s son – but there is one heiress he will not marry for her money, and that is you. He respects you too much for that.’

  ‘And yet, as you say, he needs to marry an heiress, and I have a considerable dowry. There are many who would say it is an ideal match.’

  ‘In some ways it is, perhaps, but he would only marry a woman for her money if she understood the situation and was happy with it. There are many wealthy women who would be willing to unite their fortunes with his position in society, and who would do so knowingly, without expecting or wanting anything else.’

  ‘Yes. There are,’ she said with a tinge of sadness. ‘As an earl’s son, he will not have any difficulty in making a good match. In fact, I thought he was going to marry Miss Frederickson, the banker’s daughter, last year,’ said Anne.

  ‘So did we all, but he held back, even though she had made it clear she would accept him,’ said Mr Darcy.

  ‘Do you know why?’ asked Anne, playing with her fan and not managing to meet his eye. ‘It was a desirable match in every way. She is young and beautiful and very wealthy.’

  Mr Darcy looked at his cousin fondly and said gently, ‘But she is not you.’

  Anne blushed and smiled.

  ‘Remember what I said,’ continued Mr Darcy. ‘If you love him, then you must speak first, because his respect for you prevents him from doing it.’

  The door opened and Elizabeth entered the room. All eyes turned towards her. Colonel Fitzwilliam, Anne and Georgiana greeted her. Mr Darcy rose to his feet at once, but he could only stand and stare, for he had not heard that Elizabeth was there. He looked at her with such longing that it was almost palpable. He could not believe how beautiful she was. She was dressed in a white muslin gown which set off her dark hair and her ruby red lips. Her eyes were warm and deep. There was a look in them which made his heart turn over in his chest and the breath catch in his throat for it was a look of uncertainty, as if she was not sure what kind of welcome she would receive. He wanted to take her in his arms and hold her close. He wanted to dropped kisses onto her soft, fragrant hair. He wanted to murmur into her ears, pouring out his love and his devotion and offering her everything he owned . . .

  That thought stopped him short, for his fortune was gone and everything he owned might soon be very little indeed.

  She recovered her composure before he did. She dropped him an elegant curtsey, with a straight back and the slightest bowing of her beautiful head.

  ‘Mr Darcy,’ she said.

  How he had dreamt of that voice. How it had haunted him down the long weeks and months of their parting; first, her angry tones as she rejected him, and then her warm, soft tones as she had spoken to him in the parlour of the inn at Lambton.

  Now here she was again, to delight and bewilder and bedazzle him. He realised with a deep, yearning ache that without her he was nothing, and that she was everything in the world to him. Somehow, miraculously, she was here at Pemberley, and he had a chance to woo her and win her, as he had hoped to do all those months ago when she had first visited Pemberley, before her sister’s elopement had spoiled everything.

  Now is my chance to show her how much I have changed, thought Mr Darcy.

  The pressure of the moment was so great that for a moment he froze as he realised that on the next few hours depended the whole of his future happiness. But then he pulled himself together and rose to the challenge, for he wanted Elizabeth more than anything in the world. His love for her had driven everything else out of his mind, even his recent troubles, and the moroseness that had filled him was swept aside by the torrent of his emotions and the overwhelming joy, as well as the overwhelming fear, he felt in Elizabeth’s presence. The joy was easy to understand, for he loved her and every minute with her was precious to him. The fear was harder to understand, until he realised it was a fear of losing her again.

  He stepped forward and said, ‘Miss Bennet. It is a pleasure and an honour to see you at Pemberley again.’

  Her face softened a
nd the tension left her shoulders. When he saw it he realised that she, too, had been apprehensive. Did she really not know how welcome she was here? Then it was up to him, as a gentleman, to put her at her ease.

  His words had already started to relax her. A smile lifted the corners of her glorious mouth and she said, ‘Thank you. I am glad to be here.’

  He smiled with his eyes and the two of them shared a private moment when they forgot the existence of the other people in the room and saw only each other. The rest faded away, leaving them in an island of yearning hope, surrounded by a sea of more confusing emotions as they each wrestled with memories of the past and visions of everything they hoped for the future.

  Mr Darcy could not tear his eyes away from her. Every line of her face and every inch of her body was previous to him. The moments he had spent with her had been the most meaningful of his life and here she was, miraculously standing in front of him, looking at him with an expression that he scarcely dared believe was love, and yet he could not believe it was anything else.

  His cousin’s cough broke the moment and Colonel Fitzwilliam said, ‘I believe I heard the dinner gong.’ He offered one of his arms to Georgiana and the other to Anne, leaving Mr Darcy to offer his arm to Elizabeth.