Something to Believe In

by Kimberly Van Meter

  She had to be strong for the babies. She had to be strong to endure in the coming months. To do this alone—without Justin—felt wrong on so many levels but she forced herself to believe that she was making a sacrifice worth making.

  In the meantime, she simply let her pain flow from her body in racking sobs as she clutched at the bedding where she and Justin had cuddled together mere hours ago—when she’d dreamed blissfully of a future that would never be.

  * * *

  VIRGINIA CALES HAD NEVER been overly fond of conflict and as such, had endeavored to avoid it. Most people mistook her acquiescence for weakness—including her husband—but Virginia had learned quite early that a person needn’t knock down walls when finding a back door accomplished the same goal.

  “It’s really quite lovely here,” she remarked casually as she gazed out across the crystal sea from their balcony. “I can certainly understand the appeal.”

  Vernon grunted something but otherwise remained focused on his iPhone emails. He squinted and then gestured to Virginia, saying, “Get me my reading glasses, will you? These damn screens are too small to read.”

  “Of course, dear,” she said, handing Vernon his glasses. They were supposed to leave St. John in the morning. Vernon seemed all too eager to put this place behind him, but Virginia felt there was unfinished business to attend.

  The business between two women.

  She had no intention of leaving this island until she’d spoken to Lilah Bell. The woman was the mother of her grandchildren—ah, grandchildren, just saying the word, although foreign, held a certain warm appeal—and Virginia believed words had been said that were unfair.

  But first...she needed to speak with her son. “I’m going out for a bit. Do you need anything?” she asked solicitously as she grabbed her purse and wide floppy hat.

  Vernon barely acknowledged her, which was typical when he was engrossed in his work. She didn’t hold it against him but she did file it away for future reference. Virginia had an impeccable memory, some would say almost eidetic, and she always knew what to keep and what to discard. The ability had never failed her and she suspected, it never would.

  It’d been several days since the distasteful event had happened at Larimar and they hadn’t heard from Justin even though his room was not far from theirs. She’d half expected him to show up so they could hash things out, but his silence was just as damning as the rashly shouted words.

  She knocked at his door but when no answer came, she let herself in using the key card she’d acquired from the front desk.

  The mess was appalling. Clothes that looked as if they’d been ripped from the drawers and thrown around in a fit of rage—or grief—littered the floor and the smell of whiskey floated on the stale, closed air, causing her to delicately hold her nose and head straight for the window. Justin, smelling like a distillery, lay facedown on his bed, sprawled as if a giant had tossed him there, and for a horrifying moment, Virginia feared he was dead.

  Until a loud, resounding snore followed.

  Sighing, she jerked open the drapes and allowed the sunshine to fill the room while she went about tidying and straightening until Justin groaned as consciousness returned. She readied a pot of strong coffee while she waited for him to fully awake.

  “Good morning, love,” she said evenly, moving swiftly to hand him a shirt and shorts as he was nearly naked. She looked away as he slowly jerked on the clothes with a barely civil expression. “Rough night?”

  “What are you doing here?” he asked flatly, rubbing at his jaw and wincing as, no doubt, his head throbbed from a killer hangover. “Who let you in?”

  “Don’t be rude. I am here to talk with you, that’s all that matters. Sit up, please. And drink this,” she instructed, handing him a hot cup of coffee strong enough to put hair on his chest. She seated herself on the opposite bed and waited for him to take a sip of the brew. She smiled briefly with understanding when he seemed to appreciate the coffee, at the very least. “What happened?” she asked, assuming by the torn up room and his equally destroyed demeanor that all wasn’t well with Lilah.

  “She left me,” he answered sourly. “Are you happy?”

  Virginia digested the information and then asked, “Why?”

  “Because she said my parents would never accept her and she wasn’t going to fight both you and my career. And you know what...she was right. Damn, if she wasn’t right. Dad will always look down on her and you’ll never accept her as she is. So, she left me. Nothing I could say would change her mind. You win. Yay. Go Team Cales.” He ended with enough sarcasm to choke a goat.

  A pinch of guilt straightened her back a bit. She supposed she could see how their reaction would’ve been off-putting. Taking in her son’s appearance, she judged he hadn’t showered since then, which was days ago, and if she had a guess, his minibar was likely empty. And he didn’t seem eager to shower and shape up. She’d never seen her cavalier son so...brokenhearted. “Do you love her?” she asked in the plainest terms. “I mean, really love her?”

  Justin turned to stare at her with bloodshot eyes filled with bleak sadness. It was answer enough, but when he said in a barely audible voice, “She’s my world,” Virginia realized this woman had the power to make or break her son. And a good mother would do anything to protect her child. Even if it meant getting to know someone she may have judged prematurely. “Darling, you smell like a drunken pig. May I suggest a shower and some breakfast?”

  “I’d rather not. I’m comfortable right like this,” he answered, raising his mug in mock salute.

  Her mouth firmed and she said, “Tell me what you love about this girl.”

  He sighed as if irritated at the idea of playing a useless twenty questions game but he answered anyway. “She’s bright, funny, smart, artistic, talented, genuine...should I go on? And she makes me feel like I’m the only man on this planet. Like she only has eyes for me.” He shrugged. “No big deal. I’ll find another like her. Oh, wait, and she’s having my babies.”

  “Yes,” she murmured, deep in thought. “There is that.” She patted the bed to get his attention and said, “Listen, we have some work to do. You need to shower and shave, eat breakfast and return to the human race, and then we’re going to discuss some strategy. In the meantime, I have an errand to run and will return in one hour. Please be ready to work.”

  “Work on what?” he asked, scowling. “I’m quitting politics.”

  “Nonsense. You’re close to winning. And we’re going to work on saving your political career as well as your relationship.” She gave his appearance a critical once-over. “I can tell you right now, this look is not attractive and not likely to win any points.”

  “She doesn’t want to be with me.”

  “Don’t be a quitter,” she said sternly, reminding him. “One hour.”

  * * *

  LILAH WAS DEEP IN HER PAINTING world in the atrium, trying to work out the pain in her heart when a voice surprised her.

  “Ms. Bell? A word if you wouldn’t mind?”

  She turned and saw Justin’s mother standing there in a wide-brimmed, floppy hat and looking like a rich tourist inquiring about directions to the nearest shopping hot spots.

  “Justin’s not here. We...broke up,” she said, stumbling on the words because they’d never actually been dating.

  “I know that, Ms. Bell. May I call you, Lilah?”

  “I suppose,” she said. The Caleses were going to be the babies’ grandpare
nts; they might as well try acting civil with one another, although a part of her was intensely bitter deep down.

  “You’re an artist?” Virginia observed, breaking into a smile that nearly qualified as genuine. Lilah stiffened and moved in front of her easel. “Ah, not ready to share your work? I understand. However, I admit, I am curious. Justin said you were quite talented.”

  “I prefer to keep my work private,” she said.

  “You can’t make any money that way,” Virginia remarked in a reasonable tone. “You do hope to make a living from your art, do you not?”

  Yes. Damn it. She nodded reluctantly.

  Virginia smiled again. “Then, you ought to become accustomed to people wanting to see your work. May I?”

  No. “It’s not finished,” Lilah answered stubbornly, but a perverse part of her wanted Virginia to see her talent and dare to find her wanting. Justin had believed in her. She had to start believing in herself, as well. She lifted her chin and backed up to return to the canvas. “I don’t care if you take a look.”

  Virginia walked around the easel and gazed at the work in progress. Her stare roamed the piece, stopping to study the variations of color and technique, then regarded Lilah with sharp eyes. “Do you have anything else? Perhaps a finished piece?”

  “Yes,” she answered a bit defensively before reaching into the secret closet and pulling one of the rolled canvases. She unfurled one and secured it to an easel. Virginia gave this one the same studious attention. When she stepped away, she looked to Lilah and smiled. This time, her smile was genuine and warm.

  “You are incredibly, exquisitely talented. This will be easier than I imagined. Tell me, darling, have you ever shown your work in a gallery?”

  Lilah stammered, “N-no.”

  “Well then, it should be quite an experience for you. I suspect these paintings will go for five to ten thousand with the right buyer. I have quite an eye for these things. It’s a hobby, if you will. Keeps me out of mischief,” she said, shocking Lilah with a conspiratorial wink.

  “Wait a minute...what is happening? A few days ago I was the worst thing to ever happen to your son. Now you’re endorsing my work?”

  “My first reaction was in poor taste. I apologize. But I’ve come to realize that my son is madly, deeply in love with you. And since I love my son as madly and deeply in a motherly way, I am willing to take a second look at what I, obviously, misjudged.”

  “I appreciate your apology, but your husband—”

  “Can be an arrogant jerk,” Virginia finished for her with an understanding smile. “But he can also be very generous and loyal. Once he gets to know you, I’m sure he will forget his previous opinion. Besides, what he doesn’t realize is that once those babies are here, his world will revolve around them. You see, he carries a lot of guilt about the way he missed so much of Justin’s life, a fact I’m sure he will gladly amend with his grandchildren. I know my husband, better than he knows himself. I don’t believe that he will reject you or the babies with a little time to adjust to the idea. He has never dealt well with change, I fear, and tends to overreact,” she added with a long-suffering sigh. “When I told him I was pregnant with Justin, he’d gone on about the bad timing and whatnot but the minute Justin was born... Well, it changes a man. Everything he has done has been for Justin’s benefit. That’s how Vernon shows his love.”

  Tears pricked Lilah’s eyes at Virginia’s candid sharing. She appreciated her forthright information but it didn’t change the fact that she would be political poison to Justin’s career. “My past...could be damaging to Justin’s career,” she admitted in a low voice. “I suffered a bout of major depression and...tried to kill myself. I was committed and I see a therapist regularly. Don’t you think that will hurt his chances of being elected?”

  “Nonsense,” Virginia said airily with a wave of her hand, shocking Lilah with her easy dismissal of Lilah’s secret shame. Virginia saw Lilah stiffen and she gentled her voice as she explained with a smile. “You’re an artist. Artists with your talent are prone to emotional instability. Van Gogh, Michelangelo, Gauguin,” Virginia blithely rattled off famous painters as if Lilah had earned the right to share shelf space with them. “They all suffered from some level of mental illness and their work is beyond reproach. Once your paintings start showing up in all the right houses, your past will only increase their value, which in turn, can only help Justin’s career. My darling...as I said, this is going to be easier than I imagined.”

  She stood before Lilah, her eyes warm but sharp. Lilah sensed this was a woman whom she could grow to care about with time and vice versa. The realization gave Lilah cause to hope.

  “Are you going to let my son waste away of a broken heart or are you going to help mend this terrible rift in my family so that we can start planning for those beautiful babies in your belly?”

  At the mention of the babies, Lilah’s hand instinctively went to her stomach. Virginia had systematically destroyed all the reasons she’d believed were justified for leaving Justin. Now all that was left was for Lilah to ignore the fear and take the leap.

  “I just wanted what was best for Justin,” Lilah said, tears filling her eyes.

  Virginia smiled. “I know, dear. Which is why I know you truly love my son. Anyone who would walk away at their own expense to help someone else is doing it for noble—if not misguided—reasons. And you’ve earned my respect and friendship from this moment forward. Together we’ll work on that husband of mine and soon-to-be husband of yours.” At the mention of potential marriage, Lilah’s breath hitched. “Are you ready to be Mrs. Justin Cales, my dear?” Virginia inquired with a smile.

  Lilah let out a shaky exhale and slowly nodded. “Yes. Yes, I am.”

  “Well, then, let’s get on with it. I believe an island wedding is most romantic.”

  This time it was Lilah’s turn to sink into the nearest chair.

  She was getting married.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

  WHEN HIS MOTHER LEFT, he’d thought of simply ignoring her instructions and finding another bottle of rum to drown his sorrows into but the ingrained respect he had for his mother overrode his self-destructive intentions. He dragged his half-sauced ass into the shower and scrubbed away days’ worth of misery and self-pity, and when he emerged he felt better on the outside at least.

  The irony was that Lilah was letting him go to save his career—and yes, he saw right through her reasons because at her core, Lilah was a kind and gentle person who would sacrifice her own happiness to secure another’s—but now that he didn’t have Lilah, he couldn’t give a rat’s flaming behind about his career. At this point, he could happily disappear and let the world wonder whatever had happened to that bright, young promising senatorial candidate.

  When the hour had passed, and his mother hadn’t returned—odd for a woman who prided herself on punctuality—he thought screw it and reached for the fresh rum bottle he hadn’t managed to polish off last night.

  But before he could crack the seal, his door opened and his mother walked in, followed by Lilah.

  Did he dare to hope? He couldn’t bring himself to take the chance. His heart couldn’t take another hit. “Are you lost?” he asked sourly.

  “Justin, that was rude,” his mother admonished with a disappointed frown. “Now put down that bottle. We three need to take a meeting.”

  He did a double take. “A meeting? What kind of meeting?”

  “Why, planning y
our wedding, of course. And we have to hurry. We need you two married before you return to New York to continue campaigning. But it’s going to take some coordination. Luckily for you, I’m an expert planner of any social event. Including destination weddings. Because of the circumstances, I would suggest family only. No need to set tongues wagging—”

  “What the hell is going on?” he interrupted, his head splitting and his vision swimming. Either he was still drunk and hallucinating or he’d died of alcohol poisoning sometime during the night. He looked to Lilah for answers, almost challenging her to explain when they both knew she’d kicked him to the curb a few short days ago. “I don’t find this amusing,” he said coldly.

  Lilah came forward, her expression a combination of bewilderment and happiness—two expressions Justin found out of place given the situation. She shocked him by curling her arm around his neck and kissing him soundly. He wanted to push her away—he was still angry and raw from her rejection, and now he was confused on top of that—but desperate desire and delirious hope spiraled through him and caused him to clutch her to him. He loved the press of her hard belly against his, knowing his children grew safely in her womb, and he slowly softened under the onslaught of her kiss. This was one thing they did well together, no matter what.

  His mother made a delicate sound, reminding them that they were not alone and they reluctantly parted.

  “What’s going on?” he asked softly, the anger leaching from his tone, leaving behind pure perplexity.

  “I’m sorry,” Lilah said, resting her head against his. “I let my fear get the best of me but your mom and I had a talk and she made me realize that I was being foolish and selfish. I will stand by you, no matter the storm. Together, we’ll face anything and be stronger for it.” She pulled away, her eyes sparkling. “I guess I’d forgotten that the best love stories are the ones you have to fight for. My Grams used to tell me that nothing worth having came easily and I want you, Justin Cales. I want us. And I want to be your wife.”