“I can’t wait to feel you explode inside me.” I shifted my hips and started to move in unison with his thrusts.
“You aren’t going to have to wait long.” His words came out with a throaty growl.
Several minutes passed with his body crashing into mine as I rose up to meet his thrusts. The pressure had reached the point of no return and I was so close to an orgasm that it was a fiery rage begging to be extinguished. He quickly made the fire burn out of control and it swept through me as a wave of pleasure. I rolled my head back against the mattress and practically screamed as he sent me over the edge. I didn’t even care if the neighbors heard. I just wanted the release I craved.
“Harder...” My lips formed words between gasps. “Fuck me harder.”
“With pleasure.” He chuckled and started pounding me so hard that the bed cracked beneath his thrusts.
I started to orgasm and I felt my pussy massaging his length. He pounded himself into my orgasm several times before the first burst of cum spewed from his glans. It immediately sent me over the edge again as I felt cum erupting in my pussy for the first time. He continued to unload his seed and the pleasure made my head spin. My muscles constricted so hard that I lost control of my limbs for a moment and they simply went numb. He finally slowed down when he was spent and my body started to relax. I took several deep breaths, trying to fill my lungs with oxygen that I had been deprived of during my endless gasps.
THE NEXT DAY WAS ROUTINE. I woke Cody up early, filled him with coffee, and sent him on his way after a long kiss goodbye. I had kept my promise and he should make it to work on time. I started researching colleges when I got back inside my apartment. I wanted something that was close, and I needed to apply for student loans if I was going to get through it in less than a decade. I put all of the necessary information into the college website and the federal loan application form, feeling quite accomplished when I finally made it back to my bedroom.
“Well, this is going to need to be washed.” I picked up the blouse that I had worn the night before and smiled.
And this paddle is going in my deepest drawer because he was a little too comfortable with it.
I showered and got ready for work. I couldn’t wait to see Cody at the end of my shift, but there were a lot of greedy eyes to tease before I got that reward. I walked out onto the stage and started dancing, letting my eyes scan the crowd. They paused as I landed on a set of eyes I recognized. My heart started beating so hard that I thought I was going to have a heart attack. The look of disgust that was behind those cold eyes made my stomach start to do flips.
“Daddy?” I felt tears in the corner of my eyes as I turned towards the curtains and ran through them.
How did he find me?
“Oh shit. What the fuck? What the fuck is he doing here?” I grabbed a nearby wall and vomited, sending everything I had eaten earlier in the day spiraling towards the floor.
“Johanna, are you okay?” Bill, the owner of the Red Shoe, walked up and gagged when he saw that I had thrown up.
“My father is out there!” I looked at him and tears streamed down my face. “He’s in the audience!”
“Oh, god. Okay, go to the dressing room.” Bill motioned for one of the other girls to come help me.
I wrapped myself in a blanket and trembled as I sat in the dressing room. I wondered if my mind had concocted some sort of illusion, but those eyes were too real. I had never seen that kind of disgust on his face, even when I got in trouble. It was pure hate mixed with agony. I wanted to just keel over and die as each minute passed. If there was anything left in my stomach, I would have thrown it up, but instead I just dry heaved while I held onto the blanket.
“Johanna?” Bill opened the door and stepped into the dressing room. “I think one of the bouncers saw him. They said an older guy stormed out of the club as soon as you ran off stage.”
“I have to call him.” I looked around the room and found my cell phone.
As far as I knew, I had been completely disowned. The messages my mother left on my phone were pretty clear. They never wanted to see me again after I ruined my family’s name in Dahlonega. It was harsh, but I understood. The town lived and breathed the word of God, and Scott’s father was their direct line to Heaven. Leaving Scott at the altar had been spiritual and social suicide. I accepted that. I had even accepted my eternal damnation. I stared at my phone as it went to voicemail for the third time.
“Why don’t you take a couple of days off.” Bill sighed and shook his head. “You’re not the first girl that this has happened to. I’m sure your father didn’t know you would be on that stage when he walked in.”
“No.” I shook my head back and forth. “My father would never step foot in a strip club. He would never even come to Reno. I have no idea what is going on, but yes—I need to take some time off.”
IT WAS THE FIRST NIGHT that Cody and I went to bed without having sex. I broke down in tears, telling him everything that happened. He held me until my tears were dry, and I stayed in his embrace until I was finally able to fall asleep. The next day he decided to stay with me instead of going to work. I wasn’t much company. I didn’t even want to get out of bed. I occasionally checked my phone, but the screen was always blank. If I wasn’t disowned before, it appeared that I was completely dead to my family now.
“You need to eat something.” Cody crawled into bed and put his arm around my waist.
“I don’t think I can. I’ll just throw it up.” I shook my head and leaned against him. “Just hold me—you’re all I have left in this world.”
“Don’t think like that.” He snuggled closer. “I know it was probably a shock to him, but you’re still his daughter. At some point, that will mean something.”
“Someone had to tell him I was here.” I felt tears welling up in my eyes again. “That is the only reason he would have ever come to Reno.”
It was nearly a week before I finally felt like crawling out of bed. Cody took care of me every single day. He brought chocolate, cookies, and every brand of snack that I could imagine to the bedroom until I finally caved and started eating. It was junk food, but it was better than starvation. I finally came to the realization that life would have to go on. I couldn’t let the moment destroy me. I had come too far to let that happen. The girl that grew up in Dahlonega was gone. I was living in their version of sin, and once the shock wore off, I realized I liked it a lot more than I cared to admit.
“ARE YOU SURE YOU’RE going to be okay? You really don’t have to get back up on that stage if you don’t want to.” Cody held me in an embrace as he prepared to leave for work.
“I have to make money somehow.” I leaned back and shrugged.
“Fuck it. Marry me.” He narrowed his eyes. “You don’t have to work anymore. I make enough to pay my rent and take care of my bills. That’s all we need, right?”
“Marry you?” I blinked in surprise, feeling my throat constricting.
“I’m going to take over my dad’s shop at some point. It’s not a glamorous life, but we’ll have each other.” He pulled me closer. “I’m serious.”
“I don’t know...” I shook my head. “Cody, I care about you a lot, but that is a huge step. We haven’t been together that long.”
“Think about it.” He leaned forward and kissed my forehead. “You don’t have to give me an answer right now.”
I RAN FROM MARRIAGE once. I ran so far that the girl I used to be had become a faded memory. Cody was amazing. He wasn’t the kind of guy I would have even looked twice at before I got to Reno, but I had found a second chance with him. I had never admitted that my passion was turning to love. He had never said the words to me either, although I thought he did. The proposal seemed to solidify that. I gathered my things and tried to put it out of my mind as I got ready for work. I felt like I couldn’t get past the roadblock in my mind until I was able to dance again. Before I left for work, I pulled out the schoolgirl outfit and put it on the bed. I missed feel
ing the fire of Cody’s passion and it was definitely time to reignite it.
“Johanna!” A voice stopped me dead in my tracks when I stepped off the bus and started walking towards the Red Shoe.
“Scott?” My mouth fell open in shock as I turned towards the sound.
“Your father said I would find you here. ” Scott walked towards me and immediately wrapped his arms around me. “I’ve come to take you home.”
“Scott, what the fuck.” I pushed him away and shook my head.
“Wow, you’ve really fallen far from the Lord’s grace. That isn’t something a woman of God should ever say.” Scott sighed deeply. “It’s okay, though. God forgives and you will find your way back to him.”
“What are you doing here? I don’t want to go home!” I took a step backwards and held my hands out in front of me to stop him from hugging me again.
“Someone your father does business with saw you up on that stage. Your father had to see it for himself to believe it, but then he called me. He was in tears after he saw what sin did to you. Johanna, you have to understand that sin is a sickness.” Scott’s words sounded almost like a sermon, just like his father sounded on Sunday morning.
“I’m sorry you had to come all this way, but I’m not going home with you. I made my choice.” I shook my head back and shrugged. “I’m staying in Reno.”
“I didn’t understand it, but my father helped me see the light. You were meant to stand by my side and be my wife. Nothing can change that.” His expression changed to a blank stare. “You’re coming home with me, whether you like it or not.”
“No, I’m not.” I took another step backwards and then I felt arms wrap around me.
Scott didn’t come alone. The arms that grabbed me belonged to his cousin, Paul. Before I could scream, a hand went over my mouth and I was pulled off the ground. A van suddenly pulled up beside us and I saw Scott’s best friend, Mike, in the driver’s seat. The side door opened and Paul pushed me inside. Scott immediately climbed in and the two of them held me down as Mike hit the accelerator.
“Find her phone.” Scott grabbed my purse and handed it to Paul.
“Here it is.” Paul held me with one hand and pulled my cell phone out with the other.
“Figure out who she’s been talking to.” Scott held up my hand and Paul used my fingerprint to unlock my phone.
Scott kept his weight on me and a hand over my mouth. I could breathe, but I couldn’t scream or even say a word. I had no idea what they were doing or why they thought they could just take me against my will. I would never willingly marry Scott. Whatever heroism he thought he was embarking on was just kidnapping. I tried to bite his hand, but he was using so much force that I couldn’t even move my jaw. I tasted blood as my teeth scraped against my lips. Mike seemed nervous. He kept looking over his shoulder and then back at the road, but he didn’t stop the van.
“It looks like she’s only been talking to a few people. This guy Bill appears to be her boss. I guess this other guy is her boyfriend or something.” Paul shrugged and handed the phone to Scott.
“Boyfriend?” Scott’s face flashed with rage and his hands started to tremble. “You left me at the altar and you’re already with someone else?”
“Here, let me have it.” Paul took the phone back from Scott. “I’ll tell her boss that she’s quitting her job and tell this loser that she’s decided to go home.”
“She ran once.” Scott looked down at me and his nostrils flared with anger. “I’m sure he won’t be surprised that she did it again.”
“Assuming she told him about you.” Paul shrugged as he typed on my phone.
“I was everything to her. I’m sure she brought it up.” Scott snarled and leaned against the seat, still holding me down as he did.
I started to cry as the realization sank in and the miles passed by. Scott eventually got tired of holding me down and Paul helped him tie me up. They had apparently packed for a kidnapping because they had rope and duct tape. I sobbed as the van bounced along the road and hours passed. One of them held me against the floorboard when they stopped for gas, and they took turns driving while the others slept. They made a few bathroom breaks, stopping along abandoned stretches of highway so nobody would see us. Running was impossible. I wouldn’t have gotten very far. I faded into exhausted unconsciousness a few times along the way, but when we rolled into Dahlonega, I was wide awake.
“Welcome home.” Scott smiled and pushed the back doors of the van open.
“I’M NOT GOING TO LEAVE my daughter tied up in my living room!” I was sideways on the couch listening to my father argue with Scott.
“She’s just going to run if we untie her.” Scott’s voice cracked as he spoke, almost as if it was filled with fear. “My father will be here soon. He’ll know what to do.”
“This isn’t what I wanted, Scott!” My father’s tone was angry. “When you said you would bring her home, I thought you meant that you would talk some sense into her!”
“I tried!” Scott snorted and sighed. “She wasn’t going to come home on her own.”
“Then you should have left her there! I wanted my daughter home, but not like this. This is awful! This isn’t who we are!” I could hear my father’s footsteps walking towards the living room as he spoke. “I’m sorry, Johanna. We’ll get this figured out in a moment.”
“It seems like this is already figured out.” The voice was one I had heard every Sunday since I was a little girl, and a lot more frequently once I started dating Scott.
“Dad...” Scott walked towards his father’s voice. “I had to do this. There was no other way.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, son.” Scott’s father walked into the living room and he looked down at me. “We couldn’t have a lost soul out there without doing whatever was necessary to bring her home.”
Chapter 10: Cody
I’m sorry. I can’t do this anymore. I’m going home.
The words took my breath away. I rode against the wind as fast as my motorcycle would go and blew through every stop sign until I got to Johanna’s apartment. I beat on her door and when there was no answer, I kicked it clean off the hinges. Everything was exactly the way I remembered, except Johanna was gone. The police came shortly after that and I was taken to jail. They didn’t care what I had to say. As far as they could tell, I had broken into her apartment. The jail cell might as well have been my tomb, because my reason for living was gone. I had a lot of time to reflect on my relationship with Johanna, my feelings for her, and the pain of having her yanked away from me, while I was staring at the gray walls of my cell.
“OKAY, MR. SMITH. YOU’RE free to go.” The guard walked up to my cell and slid it open.
“Did they find her? Did they find Johanna?” I ran to the door.
“I guess so. All I know is that they confirmed she isn’t pressing any charges for this. You’ll have to pay for the door, though.” He shrugged and led me towards the exit.
My phone was dead and when I got to my apartment, I immediately plugged it in. There was a longer text message from Johanna, explaining that our time together was a mistake, and she had to return to the life she knew. None of it made any sense. We were so happy before her father showed up. She seemed so independent and determined to overcome that setback once she had time to process it. I understood that she cared for her family, but they weren’t returning any of her calls. I sat down on the edge of my bed and lit a cigarette, watching as the smoke rushed from my lips.
“The fucking proposal.” I stood up and kicked the nightstand next to my bed. “You stupid fucking asshole!”
I grabbed the lamp on my nightstand and hurled it across the room. It smashed into the mirror and exploded. Shards of glass and ceramic covered the floor. I walked to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. I didn’t bother pouring it into a glass, I just drank it in gulps. The proposal was a horrible mistake. I tried to strip away her independence and lock her down the same way her asshole boyfriend
in Georgia had done. It was the heat of the moment and it was going to haunt me forever. I drowned my thoughts and stared into the darkness until the sun started illuminating my apartment again.
It’ll be time to go to work soon.
I felt sick as I started getting dressed. I threw up a few times before I finally got myself together. I was still drunk, but I didn’t care. I needed something to take my mind off Johanna and a long day of work would do that. I was also fairly certain my absence had left my parents in a huge bind. I had already destroyed my relationship with Johanna. I didn’t need to destroy anything else in my life. I stared at my phone through a haze before I finally stuffed it in my pocket. I had left Johanna several messages and called her at least two dozen times. She never answered and she didn’t call me back. Whatever I believed we had was clearly nothing more than a fling from the reality of her real life—the life she went back to.
“CODY, THANK GOD.” My mother ran up and hugged me the second I parked my motorcycle. “We tried to bail you out, but the judge wouldn’t even consider it until they knew that girl was safe.”
“Safe...” I shook my head angrily. “Right.”
“Three days in the slammer for pussy.” I heard my father chuckle as he walked out of his garage. “I guess you really are my son.”
“She was more than just pussy, Dad.” I took a step and staggered.
“You smell like you just stepped out of a bar.” My father’s nose wrinkled when he got closer. “You’re not working today. Come inside and lie down on the couch in my office.”
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