by Lynn Patrick
Heather was already there, straightening a display. “How’s Brian doing?”
Kristen hadn’t thought much about her younger brother since she’d started worrying over the possibility of leaving Sparrow Lake and her relatives and friends. And especially Alex. “Fine, I think. You haven’t heard about any more pranks, have you?”
“No, thank goodness. Facing up to their actions seems to have gotten those boys back on the straight path. We’re lucky to have a man like Alex in charge around here.”
“I agree.”
Alex was a fine man for all kinds of reasons. The best man she had ever dated. The only one who had ever made her heart pound crazily.
The only one who had ever made her question her decisions.
“He’s good with kids of all ages,” Heather said with enthusiasm. “Addison and Taylor loved having him read them a story before they went to sleep.”
“I know.” Her sister’s expectant look made Kristen shift uncomfortably. She supposed she could talk to Heather about her feelings, but the thought made her downright edgy.
“It was nice to have a positive male role model for them,” Heather went on. “Considering they’re missing a father. Bring him over anytime.”
“Okay.” Though Kristen wasn’t certain when she’d be seeing Alex again. And thinking about all his good qualities somehow made her feel worse.
“Are you all right?” Heather gazed closely at her sister. “You look a little peaked.”
No wonder, considering the decisions she had to make. “I’m fine.”
“Well, as I’ve been telling you, I’m back on track. I was just a little tired last week. We all get that way.”
“I know. I don’t hold it against you. You have a lot of responsibility.” And she meant to take her sister’s situation into consideration when changing anything about the business, including her plans for improvement.
Gloria arrived with a sunny smile. After storing her purse behind the counter, she went to work opening some boxes of new fabrics that had been delivered the day before.
Kristen drew a tall stool up to the counter to make to-do lists on a notepad, her normal procedure. Without even thinking, she realized she had created one list for things to do if she took the job in Chicago and another list for if she kept working in Sparrow Lake. This was nuts! She tore off the pages, crumpled them and threw them away.
She’d started a whole other list of things to do—for this day alone, since it was as far ahead as she could think—when Shara came in carrying a big bag.
Trying to be perky and positive, Kristen said, “Hi! Run out of fabric?”
“No.” Shara appeared rather glum. “I’m glad you’re still here.”
“You mean today?”
“I mean anytime. I heard you were leaving.”
Beyond Shara, Kristen noticed Gloria shaking her head vigorously at the other woman while mouthing “no.”
“You heard that from whom?” Kristen asked, a little miffed that people were gossiping about her again.
“I’m sure everyone witnessed our public spat the other day,” Heather put in. “They couldn’t help it.”
Kristen guessed that was a fair observation.
“When are you going?” Shara asked, laying her bag on the counter.
“I don’t know. I haven’t even decided yet if I want the job or not.”
“You mean there’s still a chance?” Shara brightened. “Is there anything we can do to get you to stay?”
Gloria was watching closely, as was Heather, Kristen noted.
“I just need time to think about it. Myself.” She made haste to change the subject. “What have you got in the bag?” She pulled up an edge to peek at what seemed to be a quilt in blues, soft grays and creams. “Wow, it looks beautiful.”
“I’m glad you like it,” said Shara.
“May I take it out and examine it more closely?” Kristen asked.
“No!” Gloria’s response was so emphatic that it made Kristen flinch.
“It’s best not to look.” Shara glanced anxiously at Gloria. “I’m sorry, I’m making a mess of things here.”
“Let’s go to the back of the store,” Gloria said.
Now Kristen was really curious. “Wait a minute. What’s going on?”
Shara said, “We might as well tell her.”
Gloria sighed. “Okay, I guess.”
“This is…was for you,” Shara explained. “A gift from the quilting group on Tuesday night.”
“We’re still working on it, though,” Gloria added. “It’s not done.”
A gift? Why? Kristen wondered. They surely couldn’t have put something together so fast as a going-away present.
“The theme is true blue.” Shara ran her hand over the quilt. “A true blue, true love quilt, that is. For you and Chief Novak.”
“Oh.” Kristen felt her face grow warm. “That…that’s sweet…” She didn’t even know if there would be a her and Alex. “A true love quilt?”
“That’s what the pattern’s called,” said Gloria.
“What’s going to happen with you two when…if…you leave?” asked Shara.
“I’m hoping we can still see each other on weekends.” Though she wasn’t confident that Alex was on board with that. Since he wanted nothing more to do with the city—for good reason—he might not even choose to date a woman who lived there.
“Well, you two look so cute together,” Shara said. “Sometimes you can just tell that a couple are perfect for each other.”
Gloria nodded, and Heather just smiled.
“The quilt is really special. Thank you. But I don’t know if I deserve it. I mean, I don’t know what is going to happen with Alex and me. Right now I’m not sure about anything.”
“Okay, enough.” Gloria motioned to Shara. “Kristen’s obviously got a lot on her mind. Come on back and let’s talk fabric.”
As they moved off, Shara said, “We love you, Kristen, no matter what you do.”
Kristen was left staring at her list, unable to make sense of the words. Someone she had known for so little time said they loved her. None of her friends in Chicago—people she’d known for years—had said that when she’d told them she was going back to Sparrow Lake. She remembered one of her longtime friends saying, Hope we’ll see you again when you come to your senses.
Furthermore, she was stunned—she couldn’t believe the Tuesday group had actually started a “true love” quilt for her and Alex.
People thought they looked perfect together.
Truthfully, when she was relaxed and not worrying about her future, she felt time spent with Alex was perfect.
If she did leave Sparrow Lake, she was going to miss a lot of people, but most of all, she would miss him.
*
KRISTEN STAYED AT Sew Fine until midafternoon. When she left, she drove to FamilyMart, which featured a full grocery store in addition to its other merchandise. She did a little shopping, picking up fresh fruit along with the usual bread and milk. Afterward, she drove around rather aimlessly, just thinking.
Alex had as much as said he loved her after they’d had dinner in Chicago. In response, she’d told him that, for her, declarations were too soon. She certainly cared about him, couldn’t imagine not seeing him.
It was just that… It was just that what? Again, she became aware of a flicker of fear. Was she afraid of falling in love, afraid a man would leave her like her father had left her mother, like Jason had so easily quit seeing her? She’d never consciously thought about that before, but perhaps her father’s betrayal of his wife and family had affected her more than she’d thought.
Arriving home, she put the groceries away, then went to her bedroom to lie down. She stared at the ceiling, watching the fan go round and round. Her eyes drifted shut.
She awoke later to smell toast and cinnamon in the air. Heading for the kitchen, she found Brian working the toaster and slicing up a banana. He nodded, though he didn’t smile. She helped hers
elf to a glass of iced tea from a pitcher in the refrigerator and sat down at the table.
“Whatever you’re making smells good.”
“Hungry?” he asked.
“Hmm.” She hadn’t even eaten lunch. “What are you fixing?”
“Extra-crunchy peanut butter and banana sandwiches on cinnamon swirl toast. Want one?”
“Actually, that sounds pretty good.” Comforting. “Remember when Mom made us peanut butter and banana sandwiches late at night?”
“Yeah, after her last work shift.” He told her, “One PB and B coming up.”
At least he was acting fairly friendly.
And he made a good sandwich, she found out when he served her a few minutes later. She bit into it, savoring the salty peanut flavor mixed with the sweetness of banana and the crunchy cinnamon of the toast. “Very tasty, Brian.”
“Want some milk to go with it?”
She had the tea but milk sounded better. “Yes, please.”
He poured her a glass, then sat down with his own sandwich and milk. After he took a bite, he asked, “So how’re things going?”
“What things? Work?” Surely he didn’t mean Alex.
“Are you moving back to Chicago?”
She sighed. “Not you, too.”
“Other people have been asking you about that, I guess.”
And she told him what she’d told everyone else. “I haven’t decided yet. The job is a great opportunity.”
“Then why haven’t you taken it? I assume you’d make a lot of money, get an apartment with a view of Lake Michigan again.”
“I would hope so.” But somehow those things didn’t seem as important as they had a month ago.
“Bet your cop boyfriend doesn’t like the thought of you leaving.”
She gave him an annoyed look. Though she couldn’t imagine Brian telling her how perfect she and Alex would be together. She was pretty sure her brother didn’t like the police chief.
To her surprise, Brian said, “I kind of know how you must feel, thinking about leaving him behind. I was dating someone in California.”
“You were?” He hadn’t talked about it before.
“We broke up when I said I was coming back to Wisconsin.”
“That’s too bad.” And probably another reason for him to be unhappy.
“Nah, it’s all right. We weren’t serious.”
Not as serious as she and Alex, Kristen thought.
“I don’t think I’m ready for a long-term relationship,” said Brian. “That would be plenty hard to do.”
“It didn’t work out for our parents.”
“And Aunt Margaret’s been married three times.”
“She does say that the first two marriages were mistakes.” Kristen mused, “But how do you know when you’re making a mistake?”
“You got me.”
“You’re pretty young,” Kristen acknowledged. “Though Heather was about your age when she started dating Scott.”
“You should probably talk to her, then.” He took a last bite of his sandwich.
“I remember her saying she just had this feeling about him from the first time she met him.” She’d had a definite feeling about Alex from the first, but it was more irritation than attraction. “Do you recall her talking about it?”
“No. But I was only twelve or thirteen.” He looked at her quizzically. “You’re not asking me for advice or something, are you?”
Kristen laughed. “Why not? In love, it seems to be the blind leading the blind.”
He laughed, too.
“It’s great to see a smile on your face,” she told him.
“Are you in love with that cop?”
Her laughter dissipated. Was she? Just thinking about having to come up with a definitive answer made her stomach knot.
“You probably didn’t like getting arrested all those times,” Brian said.
“Alex couldn’t find any other way to get my attention.”
“He did it on purpose?”
“I pretty much think so. Come on, jaywalking?”
“And breaking and entering.” Brian sobered, adding, “When some of us were doing that for real.”
Kristen said nothing, not wanting to rub in his past mistakes. Laughing and joking with Brian was such a relief that she didn’t want to spoil things between them. “I wasn’t that mad at Alex. He can be funny and charming.”
“I guess he’s not too bad…for a cop.” Brian cautioned, “You should make your own decisions, though.”
“You mean about the job in Chicago?”
“Yeah, if you want it, take it.” He gulped down the rest of his milk. “And work, work, work all you want. As long as you’re not doing it just because of dad.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“None of us wants to be like the guy who went off and left his family because it was too much responsibility. Maybe you think you have to be like Mom, just make more money.”
She gazed at him closely. “Maybe Dad’s walking out on our family affected all of us in ways that we didn’t realize.”
As if he thought that was aimed at him, Brian said, “I don’t want to be irresponsible. I’m not usually.”
“You were unhappy.” Kristen reached over and put her hand on his and was glad that Brian didn’t pull away.
“I had some kind of rebellion thing going on. I was just messing around, I guess.”
She realized he was attempting to make peace with her. “I’m glad you’ve thought about it.”
“I know, uh…I know people care about me.”
“We do,” she said warmly, wondering if he would complain if she hugged him.
He set the glass down. “Because of that, I kind of need to ask your opinion about something.”
This was new. Wondering what he could want, she said, “Sure, fire away.”
“Promise me you won’t tell Novak.”
“Is it about something illegal?” she asked, suddenly concerned.
“Not exactly, not about me anyway. I promised a friend I wouldn’t tell anyone and here I’m telling you.”
She nodded. “Okay, I can keep a secret. What is it?”
“I know where Andy is.” He watched her expression. “Approximately, that is. He phoned me today from some place out in the country.”
She was happy she didn’t know the exact location because then, if questioned, she wouldn’t have to lie. “Is he okay?”
“So far.”
“Meaning he won’t be okay in the future?”
Brian shrugged, but his expression showed his worry. “I think he’s hanging with some really bad dudes. Andy says one guy has been in and out of prison.”
“That sounds dangerous.” And like the scenario Alex had described about wayward youth being influenced by older criminals.
“I tried to talk him into coming back to Sparrow Lake, but he doesn’t seem to want to listen.”
“Did you tell him his family misses him?”
“Yeah, and I also said the community service he would have to do wasn’t that bad. He says he plans to stay with these guys and make money.”
“Make money?” Andy was just a teenager, still in high school. What did these guys want him to do? “That sounds like it could be something very dangerous.”
“That’s what I think.” He gave a big sigh. “And I’m afraid I may be responsible for his taking off.”
“How could you be responsible?”
“I led him into doing all those stupid stunts.”
“He wouldn’t have done them on his own? Or something similar?”
“Well, maybe,” he agreed, his expression earnest. “But still. I’m afraid he’s going to ruin his life. What can I do?”
She thought about her own worry when she’d realized Brian was messing around. She also remembered Alex’s advice to her.
“Just tell him you’re on his side and want what’s best for him…if you get the chance.”
“If I get the chance
is right. He may never call me again.” Brian shook his head. “Thanks for listening.”
“Anytime.”
Since the conversation seemed to be over, Kristen rose to rinse her dishes. Brian came up behind her and placed his plate and glass in the sink. She was so proud of her little brother for being concerned about someone else. It was a side of him she hadn’t seen in a long time, one she appreciated. Feeling better than she had all day, she turned and gave Brian a quick hug. He hugged her back.
“I’m glad you confided in me,” she told him. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone else.”
He left the kitchen to go watch TV. Kristen wandered out onto the brick patio facing Sparrow Lake. She stretched out in a lawn chair and enjoyed the breeze. It was still daylight, though the shadows were starting to lengthen. Everything was peaceful without the low background roar of traffic that was ever present in the city.
She’d lived here for almost twenty years and had liked Sparrow Lake just fine. She’d also liked Chicago, however, and had found its constant activity exciting. When she’d had a good job and a nice place, she’d regarded herself as successful. Somehow she’d thought of her return to her hometown, unemployed and homeless so to speak, as a failure. She’d felt as if she’d lost her identity.
But what defined failure and success? Her professional efforts had certainly been putting Sew Fine on the map. And, as far as relationships went, she’d had friends in Chicago, still had one or two, but she again thought about the comparison. No one had paid so much attention to her personal life that they made a quilt in celebration of her dating someone.
Today had been a very good day, she thought, with warm wishes from both friends and family, exactly when she’d needed the support. Maybe living in Sparrow Lake would give her things she couldn’t get in Chicago.
She certainly couldn’t ask Alex to spend a lot of time in the city. His confession of what had driven him to Sparrow Lake made her heart ache. What a horrible thing to have happen to a wonderful man.
She gazed up at the sky where a few brash stars already glimmered. They brought back memories of the night she and Alex had parked at the make-out spot. His kisses had been exciting, exhilarating. What was he doing tonight? she wondered, wishing he would call.
