Home Ice

by Rachelle Vaughn

  Ben’s mouth fell open as the words sunk in.

  Jerrold nodded proudly. “They’re also going to go ahead and throw in a half mil signing bonus.” Jerrold smiled, his bleached teeth gleaming in the dim restaurant light.

  “Wow,” Ben finally willed himself to speak. “We’re going to Colorado.”

  “Absolutely. Red Valley didn’t stand a chance with their offer. The Blizzard’s want you and they’re willing to pay the price.”

  “Wow, that’s fantastic. I had no idea. This is unbelievable!” Relief flooded through Ben as he thought about securing the next four years of his career.

  “They’re a fantastic hockey club and the organization is excited for you to sign.”

  “It’s so much more than I could have hoped for!”

  “You’re a hot commodity, Benny. Denver recognizes the fact that you could do great things with the right team to back you. They’re putting together a roster of solid players in hopes of bringing home the Gordie Prince Cup this season and they know you have the potential to help get them there. You’re worth every penny and they know it.”

  Ben’s face glowed as he thought about his dream to play professional hockey and the reality of the opportunity to play with one of the top teams in the league. He was going home.

  Ben couldn’t wait to tell Ally the news. She was going to be ecstatic.

  * * *

  The next morning, Ben was rushing out his front door when Dom pulled up in the driveway.

  “Hey, Dom. What’s up? I’m kind of in a hurry.”

  Dom’s expression looked grim when he climbed out of his Escalade. “You’re a fuckin’ traitor.”

  Ben’s eyebrows pulled together. He knew already? “Dom--”

  “It’s just like you to bail on a team when they’re in the shitter.”

  “You know as well as I do that I didn’t have much say in the matter.”

  “I know,” Dom said, “but it’s still fun to bust your balls.” His face broke into a grin and he slapped Ben on the back.

  A sigh of relief flooded through Ben. “Jesus, man, I thought you were really pissed at me.”

  “Nah. Well, that’s what I thought when I first heard you signed. But then I found out how much your deal was for.” The amount of Ben’s contract wasn’t supposed to be disclosed, but Dom had his way of getting information. Especially from women. “Good for you, man.”

  “Thanks. It means a lot to me to know you’re okay with it.”

  “And there’s good pussy over there in Colorado. All those snow bunnies. Shit. I’m almost jealous of you, man. Almost.”

  Ben thought back and tried to remember a conversation with Dom where he hadn’t used the ‘P’ word. Nope. There were none.

  “You’ve had my back these last few years. I appreciate that,” Ben said.

  “Well, somebody’s got to protect your Pretty Boy ass. But you skate fast enough now to get away from trouble, so you don’t need me anymore. Dude, good luck to you over there.”

  “Thank you, Dom.”

  They clasped hands in a shake and then embraced briefly in a man-hug.

  Now Ben could focus on breaking the news to Ally.

  Ben parked his car in front of Gram’s house. He knew Ally would still be at work and her car wasn’t in the driveway. This was perfect. Everything was going according to plan.

  He walked up the path that led to the front door and took a deep breath. After testing the doorknob, he found it unlocked. He knocked twice, then opened the door a crack and stuck his head inside. “Gram? It’s just me, Ben. You don’t have to get up.” He went in and shut the door behind him.

  Gram yelled from her room down the hall. “Come in Benjamin. I’m in here.”

  Ben found her reading on her bed, just like the first day he met her. He smiled at the memory. “Sorry to barge in, but I didn’t want you to have to get up to answer the door.”

  “Very considerate of you, Benjamin. Allison isn’t home from work yet, dear.”

  “That’s okay. I actually didn’t come to see Ally.”

  “Oh?” Gram bookmarked her page and closed the book.

  “I wanted to talk to you about something. Something important.”

  “Is something wrong?”

  “No. In fact everything is right. Things are falling into place and there’s just one last thing I need to do.”

  Gram waited for him to explain. For the first time since she had met Ben, he looked…nervous.

  “Gram, I…I want to ask Ally to marry me.”

  Gram clasped her hands together. “Oh, Benjamin. That is wonderful!”

  Ben sighed with relief. “Then you’ll give us your blessing?”

  “Oh, yes. A world full of blessing.”

  “Thank you, Gram. That means so much to me.”

  “Benjamin!” she clapped again. “I have just the thing for you.” She took a wooden box from her night stand and opened it.

  Ben had never seen her fingers move so fast. She took two gold bands from the bottom of the box and handed them to Ben. “These belonged to Henry and me. I want you to have them to give to Ally.”

  The rings had been tucked away in the little box for years. She had kept Henry’s after he died and it had been years since she was able to wear her own because of advancing arthritis.

  Ben hesitated to take them. “I can’t take these. They mean too much to you.”

  “You will take them because they mean so much to me. I’ve been telling Allison the story of how her Grandfather and I met since she was a little girl. And every time I tell her, I remind her that when she meets that special someone, I would give her these to wear on her wedding day. Now, I’m giving them to you. Because you are that special someone for Allison.” Gram had known he was from the first time she met him that night they had tea together.

  “Shouldn’t you be the one giving these to her?” he continued to protest.

  “I think it would mean a lot more coming from you. You need a ring in order to propose to a girl, now don’t you?”

  “I suppose so. I’ve never done this before.”

  She squeezed his hand. “Forgive me for sounding cliché, but oh, how I remember being so young and in love. I was Allison’s age when I met Henry. So young. That’s why you should listen to this old woman and take the rings.”

  Now he couldn’t very well argue with that, now could he?

  “Thank you.” He closed his fingers over the cherished rings and knew Ally would be touched by Gram’s thoughtfulness.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Follow Your Dream

  “Ally, can you meet me at our spot?” Ben asked her over the phone. “I have news.”

  “Sure. Right now? I’m just about finished at work.”

  “Say…45 minutes?”

  “Sounds good.”

  In August Lake, on the north side of town, power lines jutted up through clusters of California Black Oak. The oak trees were majestic with forked trunks and lobed leaves. Next to them, tall pine trees swayed in the breeze, their shiny needles dancing. When the lake came into view around the bend, Ben smiled. Everything was falling into place. He knew he was moments away from having it all.

  He pulled off onto the vista point and saw that Ally’s car was already parked there next to a flowering Dogwood. She was standing at the railing looking over at the dam. The breeze tossed her blonde hair around her shoulders like corn silk. She turned around when she heard him approach and he thought he had never seen anyone as beautiful. He went to her and the two of them were smack dab in the middle of nature’s pure splendor, standing virtually at the top of the world.

  “Hi,” she said and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

  “Hi.” He brought her in for a kiss and didn’t let go of her until she was breathless.

  When he finally let her go and she took in a breath, she inhaled his clean scent along with the fragrant wildflowers and pine trees around them.

  “So, what’s the big news?” she ask
ed.

  “It’s big, Ally. I didn’t want to tell you over the phone, it’s so exciting.”

  He was happy and his grin was so contagious that she found herself smiling along with him.

  “What? What is it? Tell me.”

  “I had a meeting with Jerrold last night.” He took hold of her hands and kissed her palms. He looked into her blue eyes. They were the color of the lake behind them. He took a deep breath. “The Blizzards want to sign me. They gave me an offer I can’t turn down.”

  Her face fell. “You’re not taking it, are you?”

  His brow furrowed. This wasn’t the reaction he was expecting. “I have to. And I want to. I know you think it sounds shallow, but I have to think about securing my future. Our future. I only have so many good years left in me before I’ll be forced to retire from some kind of injury and it’s already tough competing with guys much younger than me. They’re signing me for four years, Ally. That’s huge.” He was practically bursting with pride at the accomplishment.

  She wanted so badly to be happy for him, but couldn’t push past her feelings of despair. Although they were standing out in the open, she didn’t feel like she was getting enough air. The trees started closing in all around her. The air and the water were stiffing. She pulled away from him.

  “I thought you were going to renew your contract with the Razors?” Disappointment lined her voice. She knew his future with the Razors had only been a slight possibility, but she was grabbing at straws now.

  “They were dragging their feet and Denver offered me a better contract. They’re one of the best teams in the league and I could have a shot at The Cup this season. Ally, come to Colorado with me.” His eyes were pleading.

  “Ben, you know I can’t. Gram’s health isn’t stable and I’ve got work and school.” A voice inside her was saying yes, but she easily ticked off excuses that had become so comfortable to her.

  “That doesn’t matter. Bring Gram with you. And don’t worry about work because in Colorado you won’t have to work. Or you can just go to school full time. Whatever you want to do. No more worrying about the mortgage payment or the electric bill or any of those things. I want to take care of you. Gram, too. I want you with me. I can’t imagine being there without you.” He took her hand back into his. “I want you to be my wife Allison.”

  Her eyes filled with tears and she swore she could feel her heart breaking. Oh, how she had longed to hear those words, but this was the worst possible time.

  She squeezed his hand. “I love you, Ben. But I can’t go. You have to go and follow your dream, but I can’t move there with you.”

  He pulled away from her angrily, his brown eyes grew dark. “You can’t, or you won’t?”

  Ouch.

  He knew it was a low blow the minute the words left his lips, but he wanted her to hurt as much as her answer had hurt him. He had laid it all on the line and in return she was willing to let him walk out of her life. He knew how much Gram meant to her, and part of why he fell for her was for her kindness, but he wanted her with him now.

  He needed her.

  And he’d had it all worked out in his head. Ally would move to Colorado with him and they would get married and find a new house and live happily ever after together. He would provide for her and give her all the things she was used to going without. In return, she would be there for him supporting him and loving him. Everything would have been perfect. It could have been.

  Minutes ago, it had all been so simple.

  This wasn’t how it was supposed to work out. This wasn’t the plan. He wanted so badly to be with her, but only if it was a decision she could come to on her own.

  “I’m sorry, Ben,” she choked out the words.

  It hurt now for him to even look at her, but he locked eyes with hers through the pain. He took Gram’s rings out of his pocket, flattened Ally’s hand and set them on her palm. He closed her fingers tightly around them, then turned and walked away. He walked back to his car feeling all of the things he never thought he would feel again after meeting her. Aching and bruised and broken. And empty.

  She reached for his sleeve, but he was already too far out of her reach. All that she was left with were the sting of his words.

  As he pulled out of the parking lot, his Corvette growled, the tires spitting gravel across the road. She flinched when she heard the screech of his tires.

  When she opened her hand and saw Gram and Henry’s wedding rings, everything went numb followed by swirling blackness. She squeezed her fist closed and clutched it over her heart as if to keep it from breaking out of her chest. Then fell to the ground sobbing.

  * * *

  When Ally came home, Gram knew immediately that something was terribly wrong. Her granddaughter’s bloodshot eyes and runny nose made Gram’s face wrinkle up with concern. Things must not have gone as planned.

  “Allison, what’s wrong?” Gram reached for her from the sofa.

  Ally plunked down beside her and nestled into her outstretched arms. Within seconds, her body wracked with sobs. It took her a few minutes before she could compose herself enough to explain.

  “Ben is moving,” she sighed. “To Colorado.”

  “Oh dear.” Gram patted Ally’s shoulder. “And he didn’t ask you to come with him?”

  Gram was confused. The subject of moving wasn’t a part of their conversation that morning.

  “No, he did. And I turned him down right along with his marriage proposal.”

  Now Gram was really confused. She didn’t understand what the problem was. Then it hit her.

  “Sweetheart, if it’s me you’re worried about, I can go live with Judith or we can make some other kind of arrangements. I’m old and have already lived my life. It’s time for you to start living yours. You have so much time ahead of you and mine is winding down to an end.”

  “No, Gram. He wanted you to come with us. He thought of everything.”

  Now Gram was really confused.

  “I would never let you live with Judith or some horrible old people home anyway.”

  “Then I don’t understand the problem, Allison.” Gram wiped the tears from Ally’s cheek, just in time for more to roll down and take their place.

  “I just can’t up and move away from everything here. This is my life. I have school and work and….”

  “Those are all things you can do anywhere, sweetheart.”

  “But this is my home. It’s just all way too much. I can’t.” She repeated the words she had told Ben just minutes before. “I just can’t.”

  Gram shook her head in disagreement. “You can make a home anywhere.”

  “Oh, Gram, I don’t know. He was so excited and I just trampled over all of it in a matter of seconds.”

  It had all happened so fast. Turns out, it didn’t take that long to break someone’s heart.

  “Allison, I have never been one to tell you what to do, but I’m afraid you are making a huge mistake.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Arrangements

  Ben was running on overdrive. He was like a freight train moving full speed ahead. Always moving. Never stopping, for fear of letting his brain replay the scene at the dam the week before. There was no time to dwell on the past. He had to focus on moving his whole life in a matter of days. Arrangements had to be made and he had to pack up his house. The sooner he put Red Valley behind him, the better.

  His first matter of business was already taken care of. He’d asked Izzy to sell his house for him. Ben could have chosen from hundreds of real estate agents in Red Valley, but he knew he could trust Izzy to take care of everything for him. She’d agreed because the commission was going to be hefty for a home like his, but she also mentioned it would seem a bit strange for her. Their phone conversation had been brief and all business. He’d hoped he could get off the phone with her before she said something about what happened with Ally, but he should have known better. After all, this was Izzy he was dealing with.

  “Give
her some time, Ben,” Izzy had pleaded with him.

  “I shouldn’t have to.” His words were clipped.

  Damn it. He didn’t want to talk about this with her.

  “You have to understand that she never believed in fairy tales growing up. I think she was thrown off guard by having you, The White Knight, come along and sweep her off her feet. When you offered her the big castle in the clouds, she freaked out. She just hasn’t realized that she’s a princess yet.”

  “Stop with the fairytale crap, Izzy. She threw it in my face. I handed all of it to her on a freakin’ silver platter and she looked me right in the eye and said no.”

  “I know,” she said softly. “I wish I had met you after the practice that day instead of Dom.”

  “Seriously, Izzy. Shit.”

  Why did it have to hurt so badly?

  This White Knight felt like his horse had run over him and left him trampled on the forest floor.

  “Seriously, Ben. She didn’t mean to hurt you. She loves you, you know.”

  “Yeah, well she has a funny way of showing it.”

  “Time, my friend, just give it some time.”

  “Whatever,” he mumbled. “Are we done?”

  “Yeah, I’ll send over the listing agreement and all the paperwork for you to sign.”

  “Fine.”

  “And I’ll be over sometime tomorrow to put my For Sale sign out in front of the house.”

  “Goodbye Izzy.”

  He had hung up the phone, glad to end their conversation. That was all settled. His house was now officially on the market.

  Ben probably could have waited to move as long as possible, or at least closer to the start of training camp, but he couldn’t wait to start fresh in a new state. It would be too painful to stay and be reminded of everything he was being denied. And leaving behind. He definitely needed to get the heck out of town. He couldn’t stand the thought of seeing Ally again and looking into those endlessly blue eyes, knowing it might be the last time he got to see them.

  It was time to immerse himself into his sport and try to forget about what could have been. And what was not or ever going to be. Maybe he wasn’t meant to get married and have a family of his own. Then why had he accomplished the nearly impossible task of finding someone he wanted to stand by for eternity? Only to have it all end so swimmingly.