The Last Call: MMA Bad Boy Fighter Romance (MMA Bad Boy Sports Romance )
Page 8
Until the end.
However, that initial feeling was still strong in her mind. It was so powerful and all-consuming that she didn't see why she should settle for anything less, so she didn't. In her more self-reflective moments, she wondered if she might have been purposefully making it difficult for herself so she didn't have to open herself up to another person and make herself vulnerable again. The end of their relationship was just as memorable as the beginning, and as much as she wanted to experience the first heady days of new love again, she never wanted to feel the depths of sorrow that had consumed her towards the end. So instead she had merely dipped her feet into the murky waters of dating, only to bring them back up again sharply as her soul was still sensitive to the pain. Even if it was just seeing a photograph of somebody she used to know on a dating app.
Natalie closed her eyes and breathed deeply, feeling the air rise in her lungs, then emerge from her mouth in a powerful stream. She opened her glistening eyes and looked at herself in the mirror. She pulled out some tissues and wiped her eyes, cleaning up the stray mascara that marked her face with a blurred line. She sniffed back the tears and shook her head and laughed at herself. It was stupid to be so affected by a photograph. She was a professional, successful woman who didn't need a man to make her happy, and she made a vow to herself that she wouldn't let herself get so worked up about the past anymore. In fact, she thought, this could be a good point to finally move on once and for all. She picked up her phone and opened the app again, which was still showing Matthew's profile. Natalie spent a few minutes looking at his boyish smile, his features that had filled out in a good way, and those kind eyes. She remembered his calm, soft voice, and wondered if, in another life, she would have seen him on the app and started talking to him, but it was only a fleeting thought as she locked her phone and slipped it back into her bag. No more, she said, she had to focus on the future now. She was still young with her whole life ahead of her and it was no use letting the past have so much influence over her.
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