These Days Series: After Tuesday | Forgotten Yesterday | Deciding Tomorrow

by Renee Ericson

  “Thanks, Dad,” I say happily before I kiss him on the cheek.

  He laughs. “So, that’s what it takes to get a kiss out of you?”

  “I guess so,” I say, shrugging my shoulders.

  Turning to the refrigerator, I start putting dinner together for both of us. We sit down to a meal of pasta and breadsticks in silence. I’m not saying it’s uncomfortable, but I can tell something’s on his mind.

  “So, what do you think you’re going to do tonight?” I question him.

  “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe watch a movie and go to bed. I’m beat from the week.”

  “What about a meeting? Isn’t there one on Friday nights?”

  “Yeah, but I’m tired, and I don’t need one today.”

  “Okay.” I look down at my plate while I swirl the noodles around in the sauce.

  “Stop worrying about your dad. I’m fine.”

  He’s right. I shouldn’t worry about him, but I do. Maybe I’m hypersensitive to everything due to the newness of our current relationship.

  “All right. Are you done?” I ask, pointing to his plate.

  “Yeah, thanks,” he says, handing the plate to me.

  I stand and take the dishes to the sink. Looking up at the clock, I realize that Brent will be here to pick me up in about five minutes. I know he’ll be on time. He’s never late.

  I head back into my room to grab a jacket. When I walk back into the living room, I find my dad flipping through the channels. Sitting there, he looks okay, but something isn’t right. I can sense it, a bad feeling prickling up my spine. My dad has never been much of a talker, but he seems extra silent right now. He seems to be focusing really hard on the television. I glance at the screen. Aw, Animal Planet. I like that channel, too. It looks like a show about whales is on tonight. All right, can’t say I blame him.

  “You cool?” I ask him, heading for the door.

  “Yeah, you go have fun.”

  “I work in the morning, so I won’t be too late. See you later.”

  Closing the door behind me, I wait outside for Brent to arrive as I think about what I just said to my dad. It sounded like something a married couple would say to each other. I don’t know why I said it, but I know, for some odd reason, I wanted to reassure him that I’d be home soon.

  A minute later, Brent’s car pulls into my driveway. After I open the door, I settle into the front seat and turn to smile at him. What can I say? He makes me happy. Being next to him is fast becoming one of the most comfortable and natural feelings on earth. I can see he’s trying really hard to hold back his laughter.

  “What?” I say defensively.

  He smiles at me, showing off those damn dimples. “Why are you so wonderful?”

  “Stop it,” I tell him, lightly swatting his arm.

  He kisses me quickly on the cheek. “What? I thought girls like that sort of thing—compliments and stuff,” he says jokingly while he backs out of my driveway.

  “Maybe, but nobody means it when they say it. It’s a ploy to get the ladies. I’m on to you, Mr. Cromwell,” I tease.

  “True.” He places the car into drive and then accelerates forward. “But I already have you. Why would I need to win you over? I’ve already got my prize.”

  Raising an eyebrow, I ask, “Oh, you think so?”

  “Yeah. Is that a challenge or something, Ms. Miller?”

  “Maybe. You up for it?”

  “Oh, I don’t know if you could handle my stealthy moves,” he adds with playful sarcasm. “They are wicked.”

  I laugh. “Oh, really? Bring it. I can’t wait to see your so-called moves.”

  “You asked for it,” he says as he continues to drive down the street.

  Fifteen

  When he puts the car into park, I ask, “What are we doing here?”

  We’re at the end of the path on his parents’ property near the lake.

  “I told you. It’s a surprise,” he says, getting out of the car.

  As he heads around to the back of the car, I follow and watch him pull out a duffel bag before he closes the trunk.

  “Well, at least, this confirms you aren’t looking to pick up where we left off last time we were here,” I tease, referring to the front-seat action.

  “I wouldn’t mind that, but no, that’s not why we’re here. C’mon,” he says. Grabbing my hand, he leads me toward the water.

  The sun is setting fast, giving the illusion of orange glass sparkling across the surface of the lake. As the wind whips around a little, rustling the leaves on the trees, it creates a calming background rhythm in the air.

  When we walk over a small ridge of rocks that abuts the water’s edge, I stop abruptly. Brent pulls me to the right as we negotiate over the rocky surface. I keep my eyes on his feet, so I don’t trip. When the ground starts to smooth out, I glance up to see a canoe tied to a tree, floating in the water.

  “Is that yours?” I ask, pointing to the canoe.

  “It is now. The club sells a few for really cheap at the end of every season, so I grabbed one this year.”

  “Oh.”

  “I guess you probably know now where we’re going. It’s not like it’s really hard to figure out.”

  “I love that island,” I tell him as the memories wash over me.

  “Me, too.” He closes his eyes for a moment, breathing deeply. “All right, get in.”

  I climb to the bow and grab a paddle from the center while Brent steadies the canoe. He unties the rope attached to the tree before he carefully joins me inside at the stern.

  Paddling out, I can’t help but take in the beauty of the evening. The water is so calm, the lake is silent, and the view is more beautiful than I’ve ever seen. This is the first time I have taken to the water with Brent at sunset, and I can’t deny the overwhelming feeling of minuteness compared to the overall scheme of things.

  Peace takes over me as I accept the simplicity of it all. Where I am right now, in this time and this place, is perfection.

  Life really can be as simple as a boy and a girl on a boat. Nothing more, nothing less. Why do we sometimes let outside elements get in the way of what is meant to be simple? Relationships should be simple.

  When I look back at Brent, he smiles at me. Yes, things with him really are simple. There’s nothing complicated about my feelings for him. Take everything out of the equation—the good looks, the popularity, the athletic ability—and all that is left is Brent. Those other things don’t matter, not at all. I love him. Simply him. It’s nice to have this moment to realize that it is simply him I want.

  By the time we reach the island, the sun has almost set, and I am in awe of its magnificence. In this light, the landscape has a haunting and mysterious feel. I don’t know why we’ve never come here before at this time of day, but I’m glad we’re here now.

  “So, what’s the plan?” I ask, looking around.

  “Follow me,” he says, leading me to the beach on the other side.

  It’s the same beach where I first felt I might be falling for him.

  After Brent sets down his duffel bag, he clears a place in the sand and then piles wood together. Recognizing what he’s doing, I start gathering some twigs to start a fire. Once we get it going, he pulls out a blanket from his bag, laying it near the flames. We sit side-by-side and look over the flames into the dark sheet of water. The sky has become black, and the stars are out to greet the bright white moon above as they reflect light on the fluid mirror below.

  “We should have come here every night,” I whisper through a bit of breathlessness.

  “Maybe,” he says, looking up at the moon, “but this place is special. I kind of want to keep it that way.”

  “Yeah, it’s special for sure.” When I turn toward him, I see the firelight reflecting off his face, creating his beautiful profile. “All right, I’m dying to know about the poem you were so secretive about earlier. Who wrote it?”

  Brent sits up, clearing his throat. “Oh, you remembered?�
� He pauses for a long time. “I did.”

  “Really? You wrote that? Brent, are you a poet?”

  “No. I was, um…well, do you remember our first writing assignment from the first day of class? It was the one where you could write whatever you wanted as long as it inspired you. I don’t know why, but I wrote that and some other words. It’s not something I do all the time. I think it was a one-time thing.”

  I can tell he feels a little embarrassed as he admits this to me.

  “Well, it was amazing. Thank you…” I lean over and kiss him gently on the mouth. “For sharing it with me.”

  He moans against my lips. “I was thinking of you.”

  My heart soars as I close my eyes and take in his words. This can’t be happening. No one gets this lucky. Relationships aren’t really like this. They’re unknown hardships and mistakes, right?

  “I love you,” I whisper in his ear before I lean back.

  His eyes tell me he loves me, too, as his hand firmly squeezes mine.

  “Are you ready for more?” he asks.

  “What do you mean more? This isn’t it?”

  “It’s part of it. Patience, Ruby.” He reaches into his bag, pulling out a bag of marshmallows, bars of chocolate, and graham crackers.

  “Really? Sweet. I love s’mores. I’ll get sticks,” I say, hopping up to retrieve a few from the trees behind us.

  We roast marshmallows together and then feed each other the sticky treats in a playful way. After four of them, I can’t handle anymore.

  ”You have to stop putting those near my mouth unless you want to carry me back to the canoe,” I say before trying to lick off the sticky chocolate-marshmallow gooeyness on my lips.

  “Here, let me,” Brent says.

  He licks his thumb and then rubs it on my bottom lip. I don’t mean to, but I end up nipping his thumb when I involuntarily bite my lip out of habit.

  “Sorry,” I say.

  Although the look on his face shows that he’s not bothered by it at all, he rubs his thumb in his fingers to ease the pain. “That’s okay. I was doing it wrong,” he whispers before he leans in to kiss me.

  At first, his kiss focuses on my lips as he takes extra care to take each one in his mouth, gently stroking them with his tongue. The sensation of his mouth on mine is making my breath catch. I can’t hold back and lean into him, to feel his tongue on mine. Pushing him back on the blanket while our lips are connected, I lie beside him. His hand runs up the length of my thigh up to my waist and then moves under my shirt, finding bare skin. Remembering how things went the last time we touched intimately, I disconnect to look into his eyes.

  “Is everything all right?” he questions, raising his brow.

  “Yeah, I, uh…I just don’t want you to think that I’m teasing you or anything.”

  “Ruby, I’ll be fine. Trust me. This is fine.”

  “But you want more, right?”

  He clears his throat, staring at the lake. “Yeah,” he says with a heavy breath. “Of course, I do, but don’t think that we need to—”

  “I don’t think that.”

  I don’t think I do anyhow. I lean back and look out to the water, trying to sort through what’s going on with me. Taking a silent breath, I attempt to clear my mind.

  I think about Brent and those simple moments in life, like our time in the boat on our way over here to this place. As I think back to the contented place in my mind where all outside factors are taken away, I can see I want to be with Brent—because of him. Being with Brent wouldn’t be about sex; it would be about loving him. It wouldn’t be because we are supposed to, but because I want to, because it feels right, and because it’s right for me. For us.

  I think back to when I asked Lexi how she knew when it was time, but now, I know that I don’t need answers from her. I just need them from myself, and now, I think I know.

  “You like it here,” Brent asks me, running his fingers along the side of my face.

  “I love it here,” I tell him, gazing into his eyes. Breathing deeply, I whisper, “I love you.”

  “You know, this place…” He pauses as he runs his fingers up the length of my arm, sending physical chills through my body. “Are you cold?”

  “No.” Keep talking, damn it.

  “Here,” he says, sitting up to grab another blanket.

  After laying it over me, he lies on his back, putting his hands behind his head. I can’t stay sitting up while he lies down, so I scoot into his side. As I place my hand on his chest, he wraps an arm around me.

  Once I’m comfortable, I look up at the stars. “So, what were you saying? Something about this place?”

  “Oh, it’s nothing.”

  “Tell me,” I insist.

  “Well, it’s this place. It just means something to me.”

  “Me, too.”

  “I know. I figured. I wanted to come here tonight because it’s going to get cold soon, so we wouldn’t be able to come back again for a while. Well, it wouldn’t be like this. You know what I mean. And coming here with you…” He clears his throat and then kisses me on my forehead. “This is where I fell in love with you. That day we came across the water, you showed no fear. You were just so…like no one I had ever met before. I know we had just started seeing each other, but I knew something then. I just knew.”

  I don’t know when I fell in love with him. There wasn’t a moment I could point to, but it was here where I realized we were more than I’d expected.

  “I knew, too,” I say. “I knew something then, and I know now, too.”

  My mind is made up right here, right now. I want him. I want to be with him. As I grip his shirt in my fist, pressing my body to his, I know I want to be with him now more than ever. Together.

  I prop myself up, adjusting the blanket to cover us both, as I move on top of him with my legs on both sides of his. I lie my body on top of his as I balance my weight on my forearms. Looking at the shock on his face, I kiss him gently on the nose.

  “Ruby—” he starts.

  I kiss his mouth, halting his words. “Brent,” I whisper, pressing my body against his.

  “Just tell me when to stop,” he says, running his firm hands up my back.

  I can tell he thinks this is just another moment of messing around.

  “I would, but I don’t want to,” I tell him. I reach down and pull up the front of his shirt to find his warm skin hidden beneath. “I’m through with stopping.”

  “Are you sure?” he asks, searching my eyes.

  “Yeah, I’m sure,” I reply with my mouth against his, running my body against his. “Unbelievably sure.”

  “If you want to change your mind at anytime—”

  “Shhh, I know. Brent, I know. I want to. I really do.” As I look into his eyes, between kisses, I say, “I don’t want to because you want to or because…well, all those other reasons people think they should. I want to because of us—because of you and me.”

  He pulls my shirt over my head and then shrugs out of his own. Removing my bra, I sigh happily, laying my naked chest against his.

  I find myself shaking slightly, likely from nerves and anticipation. I’m a little scared to do this, but my want and desire override my anxiety.

  “Ruby…” he whispers.

  He kisses me passionately while he runs his hands along the length of my exposed back. Then, his hands move to my front, coming between us to undo my pants. I feel his fingers dip under my jeans and panties as they skim around to grab my backside. Grinding my pelvis to his, a breathy moan escapes my lips when I feel his hardness press against me through our clothes.

  “I’ll try not to hurt you. I’ll make sure we’re safe.” He suspends all movement, looking into my eyes. “You mean so much to me.”

  Despite my nerves, I move a somewhat shaky hand down his chest, stopping at his waistline. My fingers are not agile, seeing how I haven’t done this before, but I manage to undo the button and pull down the zipper to his pants.

&nb
sp; “I trust you,” I disclose.

  I adjust my lower body as Brent removes my pants from my legs. He takes his off as well, adding them to the pile of clothes to the side.

  When I remove my panties, tossing them to the side, Brent’s breath catches, and he swallows audibly. After he removes his last piece of clothing as well, laying half of my body over his, I wrap an arm across his chest and hitch a leg over his legs. I can tell we’re both nervous.

  “Brent…” I move over him, my lips meeting his.

  “Ruby…” Reaching to the side, his hand finds his jeans, and then he pulls out a condom.

  “I want to.”

  “I want you.” He tucks a fallen strand of hair behind my ear. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.”

  Those are the last words I say before I surrender myself to us.

  I realize that love can never find a hidden heart. I’m so glad I decided to let my heart out of the gate for him to find, capture, and join with his—in every way.

  Sixteen

  While paddling in the middle of the lake, Brent thinks he’ll be cute by kissing my neck, but instead he startles me, causing me to drop my paddle. Out of instinct, I reach over the boat to get it, making the canoe rock off balance. I end up plunging half of my body in the chilly water. Soaking wet, I have to take off my jacket and wrap up in a blanket for the remainder of the trip back.

  It’s close to midnight when we reach the shore near Brent’s car. The air has cooled off since we first arrived earlier in the evening, leaving me somewhat chilled. It probably doesn’t help that my jacket is drenched.

  When we get into the car, Brent turns on the heat. He grabs his jacket from the back and hands it to me. I put it on and wrap the blanket over me while Brent rubs my arms.

  “Sorry about that, Ruby,” he says. He kisses my cheek. “I shouldn’t have scared you like that.”

  “It was worth it,” I tell him through chattering teeth.

  After about five minutes, my shivering subsides, and I begin to yawn from fatigue.

  “Are you ready to go?” he asks.

  “Yeah, I have to get up early, too. I have a shift in the morning. It’s my first day back at the restaurant.”