East End Angel

by Rivers, Carol

  When would Ruby and Ricky walk in?

  The answer came as Ruby appeared in the hall. Behind her stood a tall figure in uniform. Pearl felt Jim’s body tense. Slowly his hand lowered the mug of ale that seconds before had been glued to his lips.

  ‘Christ, Pearl, is that who I think it is?’ His tone was one of disbelief. Pearl closed her eyes in distress. When she opened them, his face had washed a ghostly grey. Then, sensing the fact that she was not as shocked as he was, he demanded, ‘What’s he doing here?’

  But Ruby was there before Pearl could reply. Throwing herself into Jim’s arms, she hugged him. ‘I’ve got meself a brother-in-law at last!’

  Jim was silent as Ruby stood back. ‘You both remember Ricky, don’t you? From the club?’

  Pearl glanced at her husband and searched his face. She knew that the two men had always competed fiercely at sport and there had been no love lost between them. Jim had been popular amongst his team mates but not so Ricky, a loner, though Jim had never possessed any of Ricky’s smooth charm, which had seemed to set him apart from the others and had turned all the female heads.

  ‘You could say we were acquaintances, yes,’ Jim muttered coldly.

  ‘It’s been a long time,’ Ricky nodded. ‘Congratulations.’ His eloquent tone had Pearl’s heart banging against her ribs as his gaze travelled slowly towards her.

  ‘You two was much older than us,’ burst out Ruby, seemingly unaware of the tension. ‘I was only just left school when you rowed for the club, Ricky. Pearl, you must’ve been what – sixteen?’

  Pearl nodded. ‘Yes, about that.’

  ‘We used to watch the boys in the gym, remember?’ Ruby giggled, nudging Pearl’s arm. ‘Those other two girls liked a good gander through the window too. That Stella Burns and her mate. They was always throwing themselves at anything in trousers. Dunno what happened to her. Someone said she got . . .’ Ruby looked embarrassed. ‘Anyway, that was a long time ago now, but how strange that me and Ricky met up at the pictures again? Remember that film Captain Fury we saw last year, Pearl? Well, it was showing again a few weeks ago and Ricky was on a weekend’s leave with one of his mates. I was with Irene Naylor from work. Don’t know how he recognized me but it was that flashy gold band on his arm that caught my eye.’

  Pearl had already noted the sub-lieutenant’s gold braid and it was clear that Jim had too.

  ‘So you’ve joined the reserves?’ Jim said icily.

  ‘The Royal Naval Volunteer Reserve,’ Ricky corrected in the same tone.

  ‘Yeah, the Wavy Navy,’ sneered Jim, and Pearl cringed at the derogatory expression.

  She was not surprised when Ricky retorted, ‘And you, Jim? No uniform?’

  ‘You better help yourselves to something to eat before it’s all gone,’ Pearl suggested quickly, giving Ruby a little nudge.

  ‘Good idea,’ Ruby nodded as she slid her hand through Ricky’s arm. ‘And I want to introduce Ricky to Mum and Dad. Dunno if they’d remember him, but they might.’

  But when they were alone, Jim turned on Pearl. ‘What did you do that for? I can speak up for meself.’

  ‘I didn’t do anything.’ Pearl was shaken. ‘And don’t bite me head off, Jim. I was only telling them about the food.’

  ‘They could see the grub clearly enough, couldn’t they? There’s enough to feed the five thousand. Didn’t you see he was having a go at me? And I certainly don’t need you to fight me battles.’

  ‘You started it, Jim,’ Pearl retaliated. ‘Saying about the Wavy Navy.’

  ‘Are you taking his side?’

  Pearl went scarlet. ‘Course not. But I don’t want a row on me wedding day.’

  ‘Wedding or not,’ growled Jim, ‘I’m fed up with every Tom, Dick and Harry thinking a man in civvies has no backbone. It’s people like Winters that get me goat. A bloody reservist, I ask you! They think they’re God’s gift to the country. And what the heck is he doing here anyway?’

  Pearl shrugged dismissively. ‘I’ve no idea.’

  ‘You didn’t know she was seeing him?’

  ‘No, she never said.’ Pearl wondered why her sister had not told her about Ricky. They spoke about everything and had shared the same room since they were kids. They’d gone to the same school, had the same friends and only gone their separate ways when Pearl started her job in the council offices. Later, Ruby had joined Brewer’s, the wholesalers on the wharf. When war broke out, Brewer’s was requisitioned by the War Office and Ruby had stayed on and joined the assembly line. Ruby was her best friend. They had no secrets, except, it seemed, for Ricky.

  ‘Well,’ continued Jim irritably, ‘she should have said she was bringing a guest. It took us a month of Sundays to sort out who was coming and who wasn’t.’

  Pearl thought it unwise to correct him. But it was her mum and dad who’d written all the invitations and arranged the wedding. Oh, they’d got a nod out of Jim now and then, but he’d been too busy at work after the bombing to take much part in the preparations. As for Mrs Nesbitt, sitting in her ivory tower and sniffing at most of their plans, well, they wouldn’t have been married today if it had been up to her.

  ‘Don’t let’s get upset over nothing,’ Pearl said softly.

  ‘Nothing it might be to you, Pearl, but turning up at me wedding without an invite is a bloody big insult to me.’ He stiffened his shoulders. ‘But what’s done is done, I suppose. Anyway, I’m going over to talk to Mum. She wasn’t feeling too bright this morning. Kept going on about Pride Place and how it would be cheaper to live with her.’

  ‘Oh, Jim,’ Pearl sighed heavily, ‘we’ve been over all that before.’

  ‘I know. I know. Anyway, she’s on her own. Sitting there like a bloody wallflower.’

  ‘I’ll come over in a minute.’

  Jim cast her a grudging smile. Pearl watched him make his way across the room to sit by his mother, clad in her widow’s weeds, perched stiffly on a wooden chair by the window. Pearl knew that this day must be a lost battle for her. Jim had refused her offer of their living with her when Pearl had found the rooms above a corner shop in Pride Place. It needed doing up but it wasn’t far from her parents in Roper’s Way. And Jim would have done anything to win her, including finding them a home of their own.

  Pearl watched as Jim tried to jolly along the conversation. The going was tough. Mrs Nesbitt’s face was easy to read. How could her son have been so unwise as to marry beneath him, marry a person whose family lived in Roper’s Way, a three-up, two-down terrace blackened by the chimneys of the Millwall factories and within spitting distance of the nearest public house? Her son was destined for far greater things in life. Jim’s dad had been an engineer also. His job had brought ownership of their detached house in Villa Road. Their neighbours hadn’t been costermongers or dockers, but piano-playing spinsters and retired businessmen.

  A smile touched Pearl’s lips as more guests filled the room and Jim and his mother were lost to sight. Marrying into the Jenkins family was one fight that Jim had won, but it was clear there would be many more ahead. Pearl was still smiling at the thought when there was a light touch on her arm.

  Her heart jumped as she turned and gazed into the dark eyes of Ricky Winters.

  Chapter 2

  Ricky smiled and time stood still. Pearl thought how the naval uniform gave him an authority he hadn’t possessed before, a dangerous attribute for someone already as self-possessed and arrogant as he.

  ‘Could we talk?’ he asked.

  ‘There’s nothing to say,’ Pearl shrugged, glancing quickly round to see if she was being observed.

  ‘I’d like to explain why I’m here.’

  ‘I don’t want to know,’ Pearl answered, shifting her position so that she was well hidden.

  ‘Pearl, I completely understand, I really do. But I’d like to put the past behind us. I know it’s a lot to ask. But for Ruby’s sake I think we should.’

  She could hardly believe he’d said that. ‘You’ve got a damn
cheek, Ricky!’

  ‘Please – give me another chance.’

  ‘What for? A chance to do to Ruby what you did to me?’

  ‘I know how bitter you must feel—’

  ‘You don’t know anything,’ Pearl retorted, her mouth dry and cheeks hot. ‘You’ve got a nerve to say that on me wedding day!’

  ‘Please don’t get upset. I only want to see you happy.’

  ‘Then leave. Tell Ruby you have to go somewhere. Tell her a lie, if you have to. You’re good at those.’

  He looked at her with dark intensity. ‘I admit I deserved that – once – and I’ve lived to regret every moment of deceiving you. But time’s gone by and I’ve changed. I’m not the man you once knew.’

  Pearl shook her head slowly. ‘You expect me to believe that?’

  His black eyelashes fluttered on his handsome cheeks. ‘I didn’t mean to hurt you.’

  Pearl swallowed tightly. ‘I don’t even know why I’m standing here listening to you. You lied to me and it wasn’t just once, it was time and again. Until you got found out.’

  ‘They weren’t lies. Not real lies meant to hurt,’ he protested. ‘I didn’t mean to let you down. It was that stupid girl Stella Burns – she was the cause of the trouble, and I couldn’t make you see, you were so young.’

  ‘Yes, I was,’ Pearl nodded, her green eyes filled with regret. ‘And I trusted you, believed you. Now, please, Ricky, go away and stay out of my sister’s life too.’

  ‘But, Pearl, I think too much of Ruby to make the same mistake again.’

  ‘Get out, Ricky.’

  ‘Not before I tell you my side of things.’

  She pushed past him, but he caught her arm. ‘Please, I’m begging you, Pearl. Could we go somewhere quieter? For Ruby’s sake, if not for your own. And if you don’t like what you hear, then I promise, you won’t ever see me again.’

  His grip was firm and Pearl glanced around anxiously, knowing that she would have to do as he asked or they would draw attention. Reluctantly she nodded and, making her way through the crowd, she slipped quietly out into the hall.

  ‘What did you mean, for Ruby’s sake?’ she demanded as she spun round and found him behind her, his dark eyes full of urgency.

  ‘I’m falling in love, Pearl.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘I mean it. Ruby’s good for me – uncomplicated . . . a breath of fresh air in my life, and I know I can make her happy.’

  ‘But you’ve only just started taking her out.’

  ‘I know what I want now and if I’d not been such a fool, I would have known when you and I were together that I should have settled down and married you. I regret losing you, but I can’t turn back the clock.’

  Pearl shook her head in disbelief. ‘And you’re saying you’re in love with Ruby?’

  ‘Yes, I believe I am.’ He paused. ‘Pearl, does Jim know about us?’

  Pearl felt her legs go weak. ‘That’s none of your business.’

  He smiled. ‘Neither does Ruby. So isn’t it in our mutual interest to be friends? I mean, we love two people very dearly – we wouldn’t want them hurt just as we no longer want to be hurt. Doesn’t that make sense?’

  When she didn’t reply he continued, ‘And you won’t be seeing much of me anyway.’ He looked down at his hands, twisting them together and flexing his fingers. ‘You see, I’m expecting a posting. We’ve already been kitted out with cold weather gear.’ His eyes met hers. ‘No doubt we’ll be part of the Atlantic runs to Archangel and Murmansk. The chances are . . . well, need I say more?’ His smile was suddenly forced. ‘Ruby may never see me again if my luck doesn’t hold out.’

  Pearl knew all too well of the many British lives that had been lost at sea during the war so far. The newspapers and wireless broadcasts told frequently of the tragic losses in the icy, U-boat-filled North Atlantic, and she could see the fear in his eyes, despite his smile. For one brief moment she felt hope that he too might suffer such a fate and then in the next, a deep guilt that she could ever think such a thing.

  He nodded slowly as if reading her thoughts. ‘If I don’t get through, then for you, nothing is lost. This conversation, my reappearance in your life, will be just a memory . . . but let me assure you of this: my feelings for Ruby are sincere and if I should return, I would consider myself the luckiest man on earth if she will have me.’ He held out his arm and the wavy gold band glittered. Without warning, he took her hand. ‘Pearl, let’s agree that this is for the good of the people we—’

  ‘What the blazes?’ Jim’s voice cracked in the air. He leaped towards them and crashed with Ricky into the banister. He had Ricky by the shoulders and pushed him into the kitchen. Ricky’s oath was audible as he broke his fall on the table. Syd and Ruby rushed out from the front room.

  ‘What’s going on?’ Syd demanded.

  ‘Nothing, Dad, nothing!’ Pearl protested as she pulled Jim back.

  ‘It was just horseplay,’ muttered Ricky, putting distance between himself and Jim as he straightened his tie.

  Pearl held on to Jim’s arm and felt him shaking. The anger in his eyes and his clenched fists made her very frightened.

  Ricky put his arm around Ruby. ‘Perhaps we should step out for a breath of fresh air,’ he said and, with a wary glance at Jim, took Ruby through the front door.

  Syd frowned at his son-in-law as they stood in the kitchen. ‘You all right, Jim?’

  Jim nodded. ‘Yes,’ he muttered, shrugging his jacket back into position across his shoulders. ‘Sorry about that, Mr Jenkins.’

  Syd’s smile returned as he slapped Jim on the back. ‘It’s a wedding, ain’t it? And a wedding ain’t complete without a bit of a dust-up.’ He turned to his daughter. ‘You’ve got a honeymoon waiting for you, gel; your mother’s just gone out to tie me old boots on the bumper. So hurry on upstairs and get on your glad rags.’

  Pearl did as her father said, but she felt sick inside. Her dad had managed to restore calm but she knew Jim’s temper was simmering very close to the surface.

  Pearl sat in the passenger seat of their borrowed car as Jim drove them to Margate. She had dressed hurriedly in her new green suit and had abandoned her plan of a Veronica Lake hairstyle before rushing back downstairs.

  Why had Jim attacked Ricky? He hadn’t spoken since they’d left the island. His jaw was set and his gaze fixed on the road.

  Instead of her enjoying the scenery, the ugly scene replayed itself in her mind. What had her dad really thought? If only Jim hadn’t lost his temper.

  Pearl gazed out of the window. She wanted to enjoy her honeymoon. It was a once-in-a-lifetime occasion and she and Jim should be laughing, enjoying themselves and excited at the prospect of their wedding night.

  ‘Let’s stop,’ Pearl said after a while, ‘and have a cup of tea in one of them little shops.’

  ‘Time’s getting on,’ Jim replied, not even looking at her.

  Pearl felt desperate. A honeymoon in Margate and a whole week to be with each other. Jim had spared no expense to make her happy. And now he wasn’t even speaking to her.

  ‘Jim, I’m sorry about what happened.’

  ‘What were you doing alone with him?’

  ‘He was just saying he wished us the best.’

  ‘It looked more than that to me.’

  ‘Well, it wasn’t. Jim, what’s got into you?’

  He looked at her and the anger still oozed from his face. ‘I don’t trust that bastard.’

  She put her hand on his arm. ‘I know. But don’t let it spoil our honeymoon. Let’s forget about everything except us.’

  ‘The man’s a philanderer,’ Jim continued heatedly. ‘A rogue. Just because he’s got himself a uniform he thinks he’s bloody Clark Gable. He’s not changed from what he was, full of codswallop and the women daft enough to fall for it.’

  ‘Is that reason enough to hit him?’

  ‘In my book, a man looks after his own right from day one. And that’s just what I was doing. I�
�m sorry I caused a rumpus, but he deserved all he got and more.’

  ‘Can we forget it now?’ Pearl had never seen this side of Jim. He was like a dog with a bone; he wouldn’t let go of his dislike of Ricky. He was such an easy-going man usually, and this seemed very out of character. She pouted miserably. ‘You haven’t even said how I look.’

  He gave her a brief smile. ‘You look lovely. You always do.’

  Pearl was deep in thought as they continued their journey; she didn’t want to think of Ricky, or Jim’s reaction to him, but she couldn’t help but wonder if Ricky had really been telling her the truth. Could he be falling in love with Ruby? But all she wanted to do now was to enjoy the wonderful things that were happening to her and Jim.

  She thought of the clothes she had brought with her. Even though there was a war on, she had managed to buy underwear that was soft and feminine. Her shoes had taken for ever to find. They were a soft green and very expensive, from the Co-op. She would never have had enough coupons if her mum and Ruby hadn’t saved up theirs too. With a wonderful week ahead of her, there was so much to look forward to. Slowly a curl of excitement began in her stomach.

  Half an hour later they reached Bay View, the hotel that Jim had chosen. It had a pretty pink door and brown tiled roof, and looked so romantic that Pearl wanted to cry. Taking a deep breath, she waited for Jim to open the door of the car, her heart beating fast with excitement.

  Pearl lay in bed beside Jim, staring at the shadows reflected through the lace. The blackout curtains were still parted; she hadn’t the heart to pull them together. The sky was studded with stars and the smell of salt and seaweed blew in through the open window. Pearl thought how wonderful tonight was. She had felt a thrill as Jim signed the register for them as a married couple. He had even arranged flowers to be in the room with a message on them: ‘To My Darling Wife. These flowers aren’t as beautiful as you. Love forever, Jim.’ After a delicious fish-and-chip supper they had come up to their room. But now her nerves were getting the better of her, for she knew the time had come when they would make love and she wanted it to be perfect. Ever since Jim had asked her to marry him, the niggling thoughts of her past with Ricky had preyed on her mind. She wasn’t a virgin, as Jim expected her to be. Would he know or was it possible for her to pretend during their lovemaking? What if he suspected that it wasn’t her first time?