by Lucy Lennox
My face was surely beet red, but I gathered up my courage and slid back to my own spot on the bench. Grabbing my guitar, I began to strum the intro to the song.
“This is called ‘Invisible,’” I said. “It’s, ah, kind of about you.”
My fingers played the strings while my voice sang the mellow tune.
You stand behind me — Invisible
But I see your shadow.
You run beside me — Invisible
But I hear your footsteps.
You watch me, all-seeing — Invisible
But I see all of you.
Always watch over me like you do,
But who watches over you?
Protection Perfection — I need you.
You stand tall and walk proud — I walk with you.
Your green eyes are sparkling — I laugh with you.
Our words have a rhythm — Please share with me.
Always watch over me like you do,
And I’ll watch over you.
I couldn’t look at Derek while I sang it, so I sang it to the campfire instead. When I was finished, I put the guitar down and stood up nervously to hold my chilled hands out to the warmth coming from the flames.
A giant embrace engulfed me. Derek’s strong arms wrapped around my front and he pulled my body so tight to his chest that my feet barely touched the ground. His stubbled cheek scraped against my own as his face slid next to mine.
His voice was low and gravelly, almost hoarse. “That was amazing. I don’t know what to say. No one has ever done something so sweet for me in my life, Jude.”
I shrugged. “Yeah, well, I think you’re pretty incredible, Derek Wolfe.”
He turned me around and pierced me with his emerald stare.
“I love you, Jude.”
My heart hammered at the words while my brain replayed them, looking for a mistake or misunderstanding.
“Thank god,” I blurted, hopping up into his arms and wrapping my legs around his waist.
He laughed and grabbed me under the ass.
“That wasn’t exactly the response I was expecting.”
I kissed him and then pulled back to peer at him with a smile.
“I love you too, Derek, so much.”
We kissed with stupidly smiling lips. I kept my arms and legs wrapped around him and he held me easily. I basked in the joy of the moment, knowing I’d found a kind of happiness I’d never known before. Things would be okay. We would figure it out. As long as we had each other, it was going to be fine.
We kissed and laughed our way into the tent where we did very naughty naked things to each other. The day we’d arrived at the campground we’d agreed to keep our sex noises as silent as possible on the off chance anyone could hear us. It had actually turned into a fun game of pressing firm hands over mouths to muffle moans and screams.
That night, Derek stuffed his T-shirt in my mouth when I wouldn’t stop whimpering.
“The ranger is going to think I’m murdering you in your sleeping bag if you don’t quiet down.” He laughed in between vigorous sucks on my shaft.
“Feh uhh guhh,” I whimpered through the shirt. Feels so good.
He laughed and went back to work, stroking and sucking until I felt like I was going to turn inside out.
I yanked the shirt out of my mouth and gasped, “Fuck me, goddammit. Want you.”
He was already hard as a rock from stroking himself. I had tried to go down on him, but he’d reminded me I’d earned all the attention that night. Who was I to complain?
When he pushed into me, I couldn’t help but let out a moan of satisfaction, which earned me the gag again. His green eyes twinkled as he thrust into me lazily. Too lazily.
Asshole.
I scrambled to grab at the backs of his thighs to pull him in tighter and faster, but he just smirked at me some more. My breathing was stuttering, and I began to feel desperation clawing at me. Wanted, needed him faster, harder.
God I wanted him so badly.
The shirt came out again, and my begging became real.
“Baby, please,” I whispered frantically. “Please.”
“Love you,” he said.
Sweet man, stop distracting me from my lust-filled desperation.
I felt like I was going to break apart. My eyes smarted, and my heart thundered.
“Derek,” I whispered in a broken voice.
His mouth landed on me with gentle kisses. I lost track of everything when his mouth began caressing mine. My twitchy muscles settled, my frantic need simmered, and the buzz in my ears quieted. Christ, how that man had me under his spell.
Suddenly he pulled out and was sucking my cock again. I threw my head back and almost swallowed my tongue as I felt two fingers enter me in search of my prostate.
Found it.
After the next suck, he flipped me over onto my stomach and grabbed my hips, pulling my ass back toward him swiftly in a move that never failed to roust my inner slut.
“Oh god, yes,” I cried.
He slammed into me, putting one hand on my lower back and the other between my shoulder blades to push my chest and face down hard into the cool slick surface of our sleeping bags. Derek Wolfe knew exactly how to make me crazy.
As he thrust into me, one large hand reached around to stroke my throbbing hard-on, and I blurted a noise of approval. He leaned his warm body against my entire back and rubbed his stubbled chin against my shoulder to grumble words into my ear.
“Jesus, fuck, you’re so sexy. Your ass in the air, your hair wild. God, Jude.”
I was past the point of being able to speak. My climax hit like a thunderbolt and white jags shot through my vision, blotting out everything except the rolls of delicious pleasure wringing me out.
I felt Derek pull out and heard him growl behind me before I felt his warm, wet release land on the cool exposed skin of my back.
Holy shit, that was hot.
My body collapsed in a heap like a spent dishrag, his heavy warm body landing partly on my back and partly beside me. Heavy breathing sounds filled the tent, and Derek’s hand moved to push the damp hair off my face. I turned to look at him and he laughed.
“What?” I asked.
“That was insane.”
“Pfft,” I replied.
He laughed harder and rolled off me onto his back, pulling me over to snuggle against his side with my head on his chest.
Sometime later I awoke to the feeling of Derek maneuvering us into the joined sleeping bags. He slid in beside me and pulled me against him again.
“I really do love you, Derek. I’m so lucky you came into my life,” I murmured into the darkness before feeling soft lips against mine.
33
Derek
When Christmas came Jude and I headed to the vineyard where Blue and Tristan were hosting the family for the holiday. It was a nice, relaxing few days, but I sensed Jude’s frustration when I continued to behave as his bodyguard around the family.
The situation was starting to wear on both of us, and I was unsure how we were going to be able to go on tour together without outing ourselves by accident. When we were at home in the city, it was easier to be together. We had time and privacy in Jude’s house, and we didn’t spend very much time in the public roles of celebrity and bodyguard.
When we did have to slip back into those roles, they didn’t fit anymore. It was awkward and strange. There were so many small moments that bothered both of us, and I wasn’t sure how long Jude was going to think I was worth the trouble.
I tried to push off worrying about it until after the Super Bowl. The tour wouldn’t begin until mid-February so I needed to remember not to put the cart before the horse.
This time when we were at the vineyard we took the risk of sneaking me in and out of his room. There was no way we were going to sleep apart during Christmas.
On Christmas morning we awoke to the sound of Jude’s alarm. Pete had warned him the night before that Santa presents were opened e
arlier than humans normally awoke. If Jude wanted to see his nieces go nuts over their haul, he needed to be tree-side by seven sharp.
I reached for his phone and hit the snooze button before rolling over to kiss the back of his shoulder.
“Merry Christmas, sleepyhead,” I mumbled into his warm skin.
“Mphf,” he grumbled into the pillow.
I ran my hand down his bare back onto his perfectly rounded ass and squeezed. My cock was already awake and the feel of Jude’s tight ass made it even harder.
Grabbing the bottle of lube that was still on the bedside table, I quickly climbed on top of his sleepy form.
“Mmm,” he hummed in agreement.
I pressed into him and hooked my arms under his shoulders to hold on to him. He smelled like sleepy Jude, which was one of my favorite smells. I buried my nose in the back of his neck after pushing his hair out of the way.
I reached around to grasp his own morning wood. Whispering dirty shit into his ear, I managed to speed up the thrusts and strokes to make us both hot enough to come together in a shuddering rush.
After I caught my breath I jumped up and smacked him on that gorgeous ass.
“Chop-chop, we have kids waiting on Uncle Jude out there. Make it snappy, Bluebell.”
“Ugh, you’re such a goddamned morning person. And I hate it when you rush me.”
“You love it. Now get your ass in the shower. I need someone to soap up all my hard-to-reach places.”
Jude reluctantly got up to follow me into the bathroom. “The last time I got in the shower with you before we were supposed to be somewhere, we were half an hour late,” he reminded me.
“This is a platonic shower. Just two dudes washing each other’s naked bodies by hand. Nothing gay about it,” I said with a straight face.
He laughed and grabbed my ass cheeks with a squeeze.
“Mmm, this ass. I just want to fondle it all the time. Would you ever let me top you?” Jude asked.
I turned on the faucet before turning around to look at him. “Is that something you’ve been thinking about?”
“Yes. You have a gorgeous ass, and it’s been tempting me more than usual lately. But if you don’t want to, that’s okay too.”
My heart sped up and I felt blood rushing south again. I reached down to tell my dick to shut it.
“I’ve never bottomed before, but I’m willing to try. Can we wait until we get home though? I’m not sure I can relax enough when I know your family could be in the next room. Can you imagine me yelling, ‘Harder, Jude, pound that ass,’ while your mom or, god forbid, Aunt Tilly listens through the door?” I asked, my words causing Jude to shudder in disgust.
“Christ, that’s disturbing,” Jude said. “Be careful or I won’t let you come anywhere near me again until we get home.”
“Liar,” I accused.
“Fine,” he said. “I admit to being a predictable wanton harlot. Now fucking wash my dick like you mean it so we can go act like strangers in front of my family.”
Christmas Day with Jude’s family brought several surprises, including a spontaneous decision for the Marians to go to Maui the following week to see Blue and Tristan tie the knot. Jude’s friend Wayne Travis offered to loan the family the use of his Maui estate for the trip, which made planning exponentially easier.
Jude called Ollie to ask if she could arrange a charter jet also asking if she wanted to join us there. She said her father’s retirement ceremony from the SFPD was too important to miss and she spent the rest of the evening sending Jude pitiful texts about how she always missed out on Marian weddings.
He promised her she would not miss out on his own. Just the idea of Jude marrying someone made my stomach twist. I couldn’t decide if it was twisting with nerves that the someone would be me or nerves that it wouldn’t.
All of this wedding talk just brought home the fact that there would come a time when we had to decide what the future of our relationship looked like. And that thought terrified me.
When we got back to his house the following day, Jude and I exchanged our own Christmas gifts before Mike was scheduled to arrive to take my place for two days. Leaving Jude was getting harder and now it was beginning to really piss me off. The whole situation was unfair.
I was nervous about exchanging gifts with Jude because he was a multimillionaire, and I was barely a multi-thousandaire. He was usually sensitive to the difference between our financial situations because he knew it messed with my pride.
I handed him a wrapped package and sat next to him on the couch in the kitchen. He turned to face me with his back against the arm of the couch and his socked feet on my thighs. My hands instinctively rubbed his legs under the cuffs of his jeans, and I relished the feel of his shapely runner’s calves.
“Hmm,” he mused, shaking the box next to his ear. “Breakable?”
“That poor kitten is probably concussed now, Jude. You’re just plain cruel.”
He gave me a big beautiful grin and began to open the package. Once he got the box open, he pulled out the first item and looked up at me in confusion.
“It’s a guitar pick punch. Kind of silly but you can use it to punch out a guitar pick from things like old credit cards or gift cards.” I shrugged. “I just saw it and thought it might be fun to play around with.”
“That’s cool. We’ll have to look around for something to try it on. I’ll bet a postcard would work too, at least until the pick got soft. Thanks, babe,” he said with a smile, leaning up to kiss me.
I pulled back from the kiss and pointed at the gift box. “But wait, there’s more,” I said in my infomercial voice.
Jude grinned and pulled out the next item. I had separated the three items with a set of dishtowels. Each one had a different humorous saying on them. The first had a simple drawing of a few brussels sprouts with the phrase Every Day I’m Brusselin’ written on it.
The second had a similar drawing of two kale leaves with the phrase Kale Yeah! on it, and the last was my favorite. It had a drawing of a beet and said, Let the Beet Drop.
His face lit up when he saw what was next.
“Seriously? My very own As-Seen-on-TV Veggetti?” he exclaimed dramatically. “Do you have any idea what this baby can do?”
I laughed. “No, why don’t you tell me about it?”
“Did you know you can make noodles out of many different vegetables?” he said, continuing in his melodramatic announcer voice. “But when you make noodles out of veggies, you don’t call them noodles. Do you know what you call them, Derek?”
“Uh…” I pretended not to know. “Vegoodles?”
“Why, zoodles, of course!” He laughed and climbed onto my lap.
“Thank you, Wolfe,” Jude said with the sweetest smile over his soft brown eyes. “You and I both know I really wanted this but was too embarrassed to admit it.” His lips came down on mine in an appreciative kiss. “You know what this means, though, right?”
“That I’m having spiralized vegetables every night for the foreseeable future?” I asked.
“Yup. You lucky dog. All veggies, all the time. They’ll probably taste just like pasta once they’re shaped like it. Don’t you worry.”
I rolled my eyes at the blatant lie, and he laughed.
“Why do you think I waited to give it to you until I was getting ready to leave for two days? You can serve Mike all the zoodles you want.”
“What’s the last thing? I love these towels, by the way.”
He pulled out the last towel and found the small box underneath.
“Now it’s my turn to get a little corny. I felt like I owed it to you,” I said while trying to hide my nerves.
Inside was a slim leather bracelet like the kind he sometimes wore. Stamped into the surface was the refrain from the song he wrote for me.
Always watch over me like you do,
and I’ll watch over you.
“Derek, oh my god, I love it,” he said, shining brown eyes meeting mine. “It’
s perfect.”
He was in my arms again, and I buried my face in his neck.
“I’m glad you like it. That song means so much to me and I wanted you to know I felt the same way.”
We kissed for a long moment until Jude sniffed and pulled back, wiping his eyes and laughing at himself.
“Shut up. I know I’m a sentimental sap.” He handed the bracelet to me to put it on him.
“I love that you’re sentimental. Well, maybe not when you’re watching commercials during football games,” I teased.
“That was one time, Wolfe, and those puppies were orphans, for god’s sake,” he said.
“Okay, my turn,” I said. “Gimme. I’m hoping you saw the Maserati catalog I left in your bathroom a few weeks ago.”
He leaned over to grab a gift off the coffee table.
“As a matter of fact, I did see it. I ordered one for Aunt Tilly,” he said. “She returned it because she said the backseat wasn’t big enough for making out at the drive-in movies.”
“I believe it.” I chuckled. “Can you even imagine that woman behind the wheel of a sports car?”
“Yes, and it terrifies me. Open your present.”
I opened the small box and saw a bundled up T-shirt. It was an exact replica of my favorite Guns N’ Roses concert T-shirt. I had gotten it at the last concert I went to before my deployment to Afghanistan, and it had practically disintegrated months before. When I unfurled it, something fell onto my lap. A key on a keychain. It wasn’t a Maserati key; it looked like a house key.
“Jude, I already have a key to your house. What’s this for?”
34
Jude
Why was I so damned nervous about this?
“It’s not a key to the house. It’s a key to the apartment over the garage. Ollie is moving out, and I was hoping you might want to move in and get rid of your apartment.”
Derek stared at me for a minute, and my stomach really began to lurch.
“If not, I mean, if that’s not something you want to do, I completely understand,” I stammered in my usual stupid, nervous way. “Don’t feel pressure or obligation or anything.”
I forced myself to stop stammering and take a breath. Somehow I’d ended up with my back pressed as far into the opposite side of the couch as I could get from Derek. My nerves were taut, and I was afraid they were going to snap with disappointment when he opened his mouth.
