by Allie Able
Katie wanders further into the room, with me following closely behind her. I stand back as she looks around the space. She walks into the the kitchen and all of the bedrooms, before she comes back over to me.
“This is incredible, Nick.”
I nod my head and smile. “I know. The price was well below my budget and with me doing most of the renovations by myself, it was a steal.”
She smiles and spins in a circle, looking at the view one more time. “I can’t wait to see what you do with it.”
I walk over to her and kiss her on top of the head. “I’m glad you like it, sweetheart.”
We both look out at the view for a few more minutes, before loading back into my truck and making the drive to my parents’ house.
Lexie’s car is already parked in the driveway and my dad is sitting on the porch drinking his coffee.
“Good morning, Dad,” I say, as I lead Katie up the stairs.
He gives a sad smile and stands up. “Good morning you two. Are you hungry?”
We both nod our heads and follow him inside towards the kitchen.
“Mom, I said ‘no’, and I don’t want to talk about it anymore,” Lexie says.
My mom opens her mouth to respond, but when she sees us walking in, she snaps it closed.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
“Nothing,” Lexie says with a wave of her hand.
My mom glares at Lexie, but doesn’t say anything further about her odd behavior. I walk over to her and drop a kiss to her cheek and she pulls Katie into a hug. I make my way over to Lexie and sit down at the kitchen table with her.
“Are you OK?” I ask.
She rolls her eyes and nods her head. “I’m fine, Nick. What time does your flight leave?” she asks, changing the subject.
I decide to let it go. I don’t have the time to drag the truth out of her right now. “I’ve got to be there by noon.”
Lexie smiles over at Katie, as she joins us at the table and sits next to me.
“Did y’all have fun last night?”
I look over at Katie as she nods her head and smiles. “I always have fun with that group, and Summer and Grants house is so beautiful.”
“You should have seen it before Grant did all of the renovations,” Lexie says with a laugh.
“Have you seen Nick’s house?” Katie asks.
Lexie cuts her eyes to me and gives me the stern sister look. Shit. I haven’t told anyone except Grant and Katie about the house.
“I haven’t,” Lexie responds, still giving me dirty look.
“You bought a house?” my mom asks, as she sets the biscuits and gravy on the table.
Katie looks at me with wide eyes. I smile, reassuring her, before looking at my mom and Lexie. “Yeah, I figured when I came home I wouldn’t want to live in the condo anymore. The house needs a lot of renovations though.”
They both smile and look between me and Katie. Luckily, Katie doesn’t notice and my dad picks that moment to join us.
“Nick bought a house Harold. Isn’t that great?” my mom asks, with a wide smile.
“Really?” my dad asks, as he sits down.
“Yeah, I was just telling them that I’m going to have to renovate it, but the location is incredible.
“Where’s it at?”
“The house on Dunes Drive. I don’t think anyone has lived in it for awhile.”
He nods his head. “I think I know the one you’re talking about.”
Mom finishes putting everything on the table and we all fix our plates.
I lay my hand on Katie’s leg, while I eat. I only have a few more hours, before I have to leave, and I want to touch her as much as possible.
We make small talk throughout breakfast and it’s not long before Katie and I need to head to the airport.
I stand from the table and go to my sister first. Her eyes are bright and shiny, with unshed tears, as she wraps her arms around me.
“I love you,” she whispers.
“I love you too, Lex.”
“Please be safe,” she says squeezing me tighter.
“Always,” I respond.
She eventually lets me go, giving me a tight smile and squeezing my arm one more time.
My mom is openly crying, when I walk over to her. God, I hate this part. I know me leaving takes a toll on my family and I hate that I put them through it every time.
“Bye, Mom,” I say, wrapping my arms around her and holding her close.
“I love you, son.”
“Love you too.”
We stay like that for a few minutes, before my dad comes up and pats my shoulder.
“Come on, Lydia. He’s going to miss his flight,” he jokes, but I can see the concern in his eyes.
“This is the last time we will have to do this, I promise,” I say, as Mom lets go and Dad pulls her to him.
Dad pulls me to him, with one arm, and pats my back. “I’m so proud of you, son,” he says in a low voice.
My throat feels tight and I can only manage a nod. I watch Katie give everyone hugs and thank them for breakfast, before walking over to me and taking my hand.
I give everyone one last look, as we make our way towards the front door. I help Katie into the truck, before walking over to the driver side. Mom and Dad wave from the front porch as I put my truck in reverse and back out of the driveway.
“Shit. That never gets any easier,” I mumble.
Katie reaches across the center console and takes my hand, giving it a squeeze.
We don’t say much on the way to the airport. Every once in awhile I feel her staring at me, but I don’t say anything about it. If she were driving, I would be staring at her too.
I give her hand a squeeze as we pull onto airport drive and head to the short term parking garage. I want her with me, until she can’t come any farther. I look down at my clock and see that I have a little time before I need to check in.
I turn my truck off and reach across to unbuckle Katie’s seat belt. I pull her across to me, until she’s straddling my lap. She lets out a little squeal, but doesn’t try to fight me, as she wraps her arms around my neck and holds me tightly against her. I press my mouth to hers and kiss her with everything I have. My hands come up to cup her face and I can feel the tears falling down her cheeks. I pull my lips from her mouth and kiss away each tear.
“I love you, Katie,” I whisper against her skin.
“I love you too, Nick.”
I hold her face in my hands and look up into her eyes. “Every time I say I love you, I really mean more than just those three little words. Do you know that?”
She looks confused, before slowly nodding her head.
“I’m saying you mean more to me than anyone else in the world. I’m saying I adore you and I cherish every moment we spend together. I’m saying I want you and I need you and I get lost in wonderful thoughts every time I think about you. Each time I whisper ‘I love you’, I’m trying to remind you you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
The tears are falling quickly down her cheeks and I do my best to stop them, but it’s so use.
She presses her lips to mine and just breaths me in. “I mean all of those thing too, Nick, and so much more. Please come back to me. Please be safe. I love you.”
“I will, I promise.”
I kiss her deeply one last time, before we have to separate and walk into the airport.
I check my bags and, since I’m in uniform, we are stopped several times on the way to the security check point. I usually don’t mind this, but I’m being selfish and I want to be alone with Katie for as long as possible. I wonder how many goodbyes this airport sees every day? I wonder how many tears have been cried and how many hearts have been broken here?
When we make it to the point where Katie can’t go any farther, I look around for a semi-secluded spot. I pull her into my arms and hold her tight, breathing in her smell and committing it to memory.
“From here you will go t
o the base?” She asks against my chest.
“Yeah,” I respond in a rough voice.
“And from there?” she asks.
“Katie, you know I can’t say,” I whisper.
She’s quiet for a few minutes. I bury my face in her neck and leave little kisses on her skin.
“When you miss me, just look up into the sky and remember, I’m like a star, sometimes you can’t see me, but I’m always there,” I whisper.
My voice is thick with emotion and I know Katie hears it, when she pulls me closer. I’m a fucking Marine and I’m about to cry in the middle of an airport. I wipe my face against her neck, before pulling back to look into her eyes.
“I’ve got to go, kitten.”
She nods her head. “I know.”
“Tell Abbi I love her.”
“Okay,” she whispers.
“I will call you as soon as I can.”
“Okay.”
“I love you so much and I promise I’ll be home soon, okay?”
“Just come back to me safe.”
Her hands dig into my sides, as I lower my face to hers and give her one more kiss.
“I love you,” I whisper, against her mouth.
“I love you too, Nick.”
I gently wipe the tears from her face and pick up my carry on bag.
I make my way to the security check point, with heavy feet. I don’t take my eyes off her, as I hand them my ticket and my license. I watch her sad face until I can’t see her anymore. I rub my chest, trying to ease the ache in my heart. Mother fucker! I hate this.
I make it to my gate right as they start boarding the plane. As I wait in the line, I pull my cell phone out of my pocket. I look through all of the pictures I’ve taken of Abbi and Katie. I come across the one of me and Katie laying in her bed. Her eyes are bright and happy and her face is flushed. She’s looking at the camera, with a wide smile, but I’m looking at her.
I pull up my messages and attach the picture, before typing. ‘My only wish in this world is to make you smile like this for the rest of your life.’
I type in Katie’s name and press send, before powering my phone off and putting it in my pocket. This is going to be a long six months.
Chapter Twenty-One
Katie
NICK HAS BEEN GONE FOR a little over a month. Whoever said absence makes the heart grow fonder is wrong. The truth is absence makes the heart go fucking insane. I miss him so much, especially at night when I’m alone with my thoughts. Abbi isn’t much better. She asks about Nick every day. He has called twice and Abbi got to talk to him once. She writes him letters that I mail off once a week to the address he gave me.
This sucks. There is no other way to describe it. I have no clue how Military wives do this. They have to be the strongest women on the planet. I’m not that strong. I’m lucky that this will be Nick’s last assignment, because there is no way I could do this more than once.
“Hey, Katie, your appointment is here,” Haden says as she walks into my office.
I smile up at her, but it’s forced and she knows it. “Okay, thanks. I’ll be right there.”
I put my phone back in my pocket. I’ve looked at that message he sent me at the airport a thousand times. It’s probably not healthy for me to obsesses over this, but it is what it is. I miss him and that’s not going to change until he’s home for good.
Haden gives me a sad smile as I stand and make my way towards the door. She opens her mouth to say something, but the phone rings.
“They are in room four,” she says, before disappearing through the door.
I walk down the hallway and into the exam room. I make small talk with the older lady as I exam her cat, Felix. There is a knock at the door and I turn around to see Haden walking into the room. She is pale and I notice that her hands are shaking where she is holding onto the door. She looks between me and Ms. Smith for moment, before saying anything
“Katie, you have a phone call,” she says in a shaky voice.
There are moments in our life that define us. Moments that can completely change our lives in just a blink of an eye. This was one of those moments and I knew it, just by looking at Haden’s worried face.
“Who is it?” I ask standing from my stool and walking out of the room.
“It’s Dr. Sinclaire. I told him you were with a patient, but he said it was urgent.”
I pick up my speed and quickly walk to the front desk. I pick up the phone and put it to my ear. If I had known the words that were about to come out of his mouth, maybe I would have taken my time walking to the front, maybe I would have prepared myself better, but I didn’t do any of that. I had no clue how much my life was about to change.
“Hello.”
“Katie, we need you to come to the house,” he says in a broken voice.
“Is everything okay? What’s wrong?” I ask, gripping the phone tighter and looking over at Haden. He sounds like he has been crying and I can feel myself starting to panic.
“It’s Nick,” he chokes out through a sob.
My knees feel weak and I grab onto the counter for support. “What?” I whisper.
“We just got word that Nick was injured two days ago. He is stable and they are flying him back to the States tonight, but he’s badly injured. I want you to close the clinic and have Haden drive you here.”
My panicked eyes meet Haden’s again and she immediately rushes over to me, wrapping her arm around my waist. She lowers me to the chair and takes the phone from my hand. I can hear her talking, but she sounds far away and I can’t make out her words.
Nick. Oh my God, Nick. I lower my head between my legs and take deep breaths. I need to get to him now. I need to hold him and feel him, but there is now way in hell I can do that. I feel my heart rate accelerate more with each second that passes. I can’t breathe and it feels like I have a ton of bricks on my chest.
I feel Haden’s hand on my back rubbing in soothing circles, but I know nothing will calm me until I can see his face.
We are both silent on the drive to the Sinclaire house. When we pull in the driveway, I absently note that Lexie’s car in already there.
“Abbi,” I whisper, turning to look at Haden.
She grabs my hand in hers. “I’m going to pick her up and take her back to your house. I already got your car rider number from your car at the clinic, and I already called your parents. They are on the way and will meet me at your house.”
“Thank you,” I say, squeezing her hand.
“Come on, I’m going to get you inside before I go pick Abbi up,” she whispers, opening her car door.
I feel stuck to my seat. The world feels like it’s moving in slow motion and I can’t keep up. My door is opened and a hand on my arm is helping me up. I keep telling myself to get my shit together, but I can’t. I’m in a dream, that must be what this is, just a bad dream. I blink my eyes against the bright sun and and look around the front yard. I slowly walk towards the steps and up to the front door. Haden still has a firm grip on my arm, but I don’t know why. I stare at the heavy wooden door as Haden knocks. It opens and I look up into Mr. Sinclaire’s face.
“I think she’s in shock,” Haden says, pulling me forward, “I’m going to go pick up Abbi and take her back to their house until Katie’s parents can get there.”
I turn my head towards Haden and blink several times until I can finally focus on her face. “Don’t tell Abbi, Haden. Please, don’t tell Abbi,” I beg.
“Sweetheart, I’m not,” she says gently.
I look back over at Mr. Sinclaire and notice that he looks devastated.
I hear a noise that sounds like a cross between a sob and a scream and I don’t even realize I’m the one making that awful noise, until I’m pulled into Mr. Sinclaire’s arms. He doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t give me any false hope or promises her can’t keep, he just holds me while I cry.
Eventually, I lift my head and step back, wiping my face with the sleeve of my shirt.
/> “What happened?” I ask quietly.
“Come on, let’s go sit down in the living room. Lexie and Lydia are already in there.” He gently takes my arm and leads me further into the house. When we step into the living room, my thoughts are consumed with the memory of Nick kissing me in that corner. He held me close and whispered sweets words in my ear.
My wide eyes search the room for something, anything else to stop the pain from consuming me. Lexie is sitting on the couch with her arms wrapped around herself and Lydia is staring off in the distance. Both of them look up at me, as I make my way towards them. I hug Lydia first, giving her a gentle squeeze before going to Lexie. She is doesn’t move, for a few seconds, but right before I’m about to pull away, she clings to me. She buries her face in my neck and together we cry.
Once I’m able to move, I sit back on the couch and look over at Mr. Sinclaire.
“What happened?”
I try to brace myself for what he’s going to say, but I know I’m not prepared.
“They were patrolling an area late last night and somehow they triggered an IED. Two of the men, who were closest to the bomb, didn’t make it. Nick was badly injured, but they were able to get him to the field hospital and get him stable.”
My breath leaves me in a painful rush, when I think about the two men who won’t be coming home to their families.
“How badly was he hurt?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “I don’t know anything else, sweetheart.”
“Where are they taking him?”
“To the United States Naval Hospital in Beaufort.”
“That’s only two hours away. When can we go?” I ask, standing from the couch and wrapping my arms around myself. Why do I feel so damn cold?
“We were waiting to tell you, and I wasn’t sure if you would want to leave Abbi,” he explains gently.
“My mom and dad should be here soon. I will call them on the way to Beaufort.”
He nods his head. “Okay, give us 10 minutes and we will be ready.”
I watch as he helps Lydia up and they disappear from the room. Lexie and I both are quiet, lost in our own thoughts. I pace around the room and she stares off into the distance, until it’s time to go.
I barely remember the drive to the Naval hospital, but it seems to take forever. We finally get there a little past 5:00 pm, only to be told that Nick hasn’t arrived yet. I call my mom and dad to fill them in on what all is happening and check on Abbi. I don’t want to upset her, so I tell my parents to just tell her that I had to go out of town, because of an emergency with the clinic. I feel bad lying to my daughter, but she loves Nick just as much as I do and I can’t be there to comfort her right now, so it’s the only way I can protect her.
