Desperate Hearts

by Lani Aames

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  “Desperate Hearts”

  An Ellora’s Cave Electronic Publication in association with author:

  Lani Aames

  ISBN # 0-9712177-6-9

  All Rights Reserved. http://www.ellorascave.com/

  © Copyright Lanette Curington, 2001.

  This book/e-book may not be reproduced in whole or in part by email forwarding, copying, fax, or any other mode of communication without author and publisher permission.

  Edited by Tina Engler.

  CHAPTER ONE

  Talley Robinson snatched up a towel and scrubbed at the spotless bar. Serving drinks at The Rusty Rose was a lonely way to spend Saturday night, but the pay was decent, the tips good, and at least she wasn't home alone wishing she could be with—

  The front door opened with a loud creak that cut through the jukebox music. She waited, almost breathlessly, until the customer entered. As far as she could tell, no one else noticed the door and who would come through. Her fingers clenched the towel tightly until the moment he stepped in...but it was only Henry Davis.

  Throwing the towel aside, Talley let her breath escape in a rush. This wasn't good, waiting for the creak of the door, holding her breath until someone came through, only to find it wasn't who she wanted it to be, needed it to be.

  Kim rushed up to the bar with a couple of empty mugs. “Two more,” she called out. “God, they're getting an early start tonight.”

  Talley took the empties and started filling fresh mugs with draft, tilting the glasses to keep the head as small as possible.

  “When's Jeannie coming in?”

  “A couple of hours,” Talley said after glancing at the big Bud clock on the wall behind the bar. “I can give her a call. She won't mind coming in early.”

  “Good. They're getting on my last nerve.”

  Kim took the mugs away and Henry ordered a beer. After serving him, Talley phoned Jeannie who pretended to be inconvenienced by having to come in early but agreed nevertheless. Talley knew she could use the extra money. Jeannie had it tough with two kids and no husband.

  The creak of the door sounded again, but Talley refused to look in hopeless expectation. She jerked up the towel and wiped away the little drops of condensation from the can she'd served Henry. She wouldn't look as she tried to let go of the hope that settled in her breast, very close to a heart that sometimes felt it might split right in two.

  “Talley.”

  Although he spoke quietly, she heard her name and turned her eyes up to see. He was part of what she wanted and needed. She smiled at him even though it was impossible to have it all.

  “Hi, Mitch,” she said loudly. Her voice didn't carry like his, wouldn't undercut the music so he could hear. He had a deep, rich speaking voice that was mesmerizing when he sang. She stepped over to him, the bar between them, and leaned across.

  He kissed her, his fingers splayed along her neck, his thumb at her ear, a familiar gesture that went along with most of his kisses ever since they were kids in high school. They were now twenty-three, their history long and varied, sometimes sweet and sometimes bitter. Now, at this particular time in their lives, it was turning sour—only Mitch didn't know it and Talley couldn't find the words to tell him.

  “When do you get off?” Mitch asked when he'd ended the kiss that was sweet and warm and held so much promise. He left his hand where it was, his fingers massaging her neck, his thumb tickling her ear.

  “At midnight, when the doors close. You know that.”

  “Think you can get off early?”

  She shook her head. “The crowd's kind of wild tonight. I had to call Jeannie in early. Too bad you couldn't play this weekend, then you wouldn't be here pestering me.”

  Mitch grinned. “You love for me to pester you.”

  “Do I?” Talley smiled teasingly and kissed his full sensual lips. Mitch Holloway was a handsome man with a dark complexion, high cheekbones, and black brows arching over startling gray eyes. His thick black hair curled at the ends. A nuisance, he claimed, but it looked nice. He'd been a good-looking boy, but the past six years had given him a maturity that could take a woman's breath away.

  “It really is too bad we couldn't play. We need the money and the exposure. Mike had to go out of town and Bonnie's mother is sick.”

  “You never did tell me, is it serious?”

  He shrugged. "I don't think so. She has these spells from time to time. Bonnie feels better staying with her.”

  Although Talley hadn't seen Mrs. Cleary since her return to Randolph a year ago, she remembered her as a pale, nervous woman and always wondered how she could have produced the vivacious and vibrant Bonnie.

  “I thought we might have supper at Joe's Bar and Grill.”

  “Sounds nice, but I don't know. Jeannie should be here in about ten minutes. If the crowd thins out maybe—”

  Someone called for a refill and Talley reluctantly left Mitch's caress. One led to another and Jeannie had arrived before Talley had time to fill a mug and set it before Mitch.

  “On the house, but don't tell Dylan.”

  “One day, sweetheart, you won't have to work behind a bar ever again.”

  “Actually, I enjoy working at the Rose,” Talley said and took up the towel again.

  “When The Cold Creek Band hits it big, you won't have to work at all.”

  “Mitch—”

  “I know it's a dream.” He scowled. “A pipe dream, Dad calls it, but I know we can make it. It's just gonna take some time.”

  “I don't doubt you'll make it. You know I'm behind you one hundred percent. Your father is wrong, you know. You're good enough for the big time.”

  “Yeah, but he doesn't see it. He won't even come and watch us perform.”

  “He loves Shady Hollow.”

  “That he does. More than me, I think.”

  “Not true, Mitch. He wishes you had more interest in it, that's all.”

  “Well, I don't. If I have to play in dives half the size of the Rose the rest of my life then I'll do it.” Mitch frowned and fingered the drops of water sliding down his glass. “I think something's wrong.”

  “With your father?”

  “The farm, I guess. He's been awful moody lately. Well, worse than usual. He's been back and forth to Memphis for three days now. Whatever's wrong he's not talking to me about it.”

  “Why don't you talk to him?”

  “And get my head snapped off? No thanks. I'll help him any way I can, he knows that, but I can't make that farm and raising cows my life. So he cuts me off from it all.”

  Talley frowned and wiped the bar again.

  “You know how he is. He's a tough, stubborn son of a—”

  “Don't, Mitch.”

  “Who thinks if it's not done his way then it's not worth doing at all. I can't turn my back on my music any more than he can turn his on Shady Hollow.”

  “I know it hasn't always been easy for you, but he must be a good father. Look how you turned out. You're a good man.”

  Mitch smiled bitterly and shook his head. “No thanks to him.”

  “You know you don't mean that.”

  “You know I do.”

  She frowned at him.

  “Whatever I am is because my father isn't.”

  Talley continued to wipe the bar although the drops were long gone. “Anything happening in Memphis?”r />
  Mitch talked but Talley only half-listened. She had lived in Memphis a while before deciding to return to Randolph. Talley's parents had divorced when she was ten. Her father was a drifter and she rarely heard from him now. Her mother had dated but never seriously until she met and married Frank Wilson. Because of Frank's job, they moved every few years. The last time Talley had talked to her mother, she had said that Frank had been transferred to Knoxville and they would be moving in the fall.

  Over the years, Talley had followed along to stay close to her mother and half-sister, but she couldn't imagine ever moving again. She wanted a more stable life. Early last year, Frank's job brought them to Memphis, near the town where she grew up, and she had decided to move back home to Randolph. Over the years, she couldn't forget Mitch and how much she had loved him. If Mitch was still free, then she had hoped they could recapture what they’d once shared. They had begun dating again six months ago, but in the last three months her life had become more complicated than she’d ever dreamed possible.

  If she had any sense at all, she'd be in Memphis now. Unfortunately, she was human, her choices made from her heart, not common sense.

  The evening was long. The crowd swelled and Jeannie arrived, giving Talley and Kim much needed help. When Talley took a break she found Mitch playing pool in the back room. They settled into a corner table and he put his arm around her, nuzzling her ear with his tongue. Talley laughed and pushed him away. It was a gesture that sent a chill down her spine and a throb through her belly, but she ignored it. He settled at her side again, kept his tongue to himself, but his fingers played along her arm.

  “What's the name of the club in Memphis you're going to play?”

  Mitch told her and became lost in the talk of his music. She didn't have to respond or even really listen. Mitch did all the talking. She hated using the ploy, but sometimes she didn't feel like talking and any question in connection to his music took care of the conversation.

  A slow, romantic song came on the jukebox and Mitch jerked his head toward the dance floor. “Wanna dance?”

  “Sure.”

  Before Mitch could stand, Jack Sandler caught her hand and pulled her to her feet. Talley tried to pull free of his grasp but his hand crushed hers. She could have made a scene, but Jack and his buddies were drunk and she wanted no trouble. She just shrugged at Mitch's glowering face.

  Talley was almost disappointed when Mitch didn't come to her rescue. Not that Jack was a real threat even if he held her too close, his body too rough against hers. Talley tried to draw away, but Jack held her that much tighter. Mitch's face had turned red with fury, but she shook her head at him. There really was no need for trouble.

  Talley had made the mistake of going out with Jack when she first returned to Randolph. Mitch had been involved with Bonnie and Talley had no intention of breaking them up. She took the job at The Rusty Rose to be near Mitch, but she never flirted or teased. Eventually she had decided to get on with her life, so when Jack had asked her out, she’d accepted.

  She’d only vaguely remembered him at the time since he was a few years older. He was tall, good-looking in a dark, dangerous way. He had seemed nice when he was sober. Drunk, he was snake-mean and, Talley soon learned, boring as hell. He had no personal hygiene habits to speak of and always stank of stale sweat and old beer.

  On their one and only date, she had barely escaped him and his insistent hands. The only thing that had saved her was the fact that he was drunk and could therefore accomplish nothing more than tearing her blouse.

  Since then she occasionally had to fend off Jack's vulgar advances. But Jack's usual hangout was Snake's, a bar with a bad reputation. It seemed to Talley that he stopped by the Rose just to give her grief. Tonight had been the first time he'd laid a hand on her since that ill-fated date.

  When the song ended, Jack didn't want to let go. He kept one arm clamped around her.

  “Ain't you through with Mitch the Snitch yet?”

  “Come on, Jack, the song's over.” She tried to ease out of his arms, but he wouldn't let her go.

  “Gimme another chance, baby,” he whispered, his sour liquor-laden breath filling her nostrils. She stopped breathing. “How about tonight?”

  “Let me go, Jack.”

  The lull in the music brought the situation to everyone's attention since they were the only ones remaining on the dance floor. Mitch leaped to his feet and came toward them.

  “Ol' Mitch the Snitch!” Jack shouted loud enough for everyone to hear. Then he bent close to Talley's ear and whispered, “When you get tired of Mitch the Snitch, remember me.”

  Jack released her suddenly and she almost fell into Mitch's arms. He laughed as he headed for the door, his buddies following.

  “Oh, grow up, Jack!” Talley called after him and rubbed her aching wrist.

  “You all right?” Mitch held her at arm's length as if to check her over.

  “I'm fine. I'll go talk to Dylan.”

  Mitch the Snitch. Why hadn't she remembered that? Jack and his buddies had called Mitch that nickname years ago over some incident from grade school. Jack Sandler had been a bully then and was a meaner bully now. How could she have forgotten?

  Dylan let her go. Jack had put an uncomfortable finish to the evening for many and others were leaving any way. Talley grabbed her purse and left with Mitch's protective arm around her shoulders.

  CHAPTER TWO

  After a late supper at the Grill, Mitch drove Talley home. The blue and white mobile home stood on a small lot near the top of Morning Glory Hill. The small trailer was clean, in good condition, and the rent was cheap. Morning Glory Lane saw little traffic and Talley enjoyed the seclusion. Her small backyard was a haven. Surrounded by woods, she could almost imagine she was alone in the world.

  The night air was heavy with the heat and humidity of the day as Mitch walked her to her door. She turned to him beneath the star-sprinkled sky. Mitch wrapped her in his arms and closed his mouth over hers. She shut her eyes and let her arms slide up around his neck. Her breath deepened, her pulse quickened, and the throb in her belly became a drumbeat that echoed along her nerves.

  “Is tonight the night, sweetheart?" he murmured against her lips and pushed his hips toward hers. Desperately, he scattered soft, moist kisses over her face. One hand cupped her breast, his thumb grazing her nipple. She moaned in spite of herself, hated him for stirring her desires, hating herself for the answer she had to give.

  She shook her head quickly. “Mitch, I…”

  “When, Tal? It's not like we've never done it before.”

  “I know—” She stopped, but he hadn't interrupted her this time. She felt foolish—foolish for saying no, foolish for being in this particular mess. She was a coward and she knew it.

  She began the process of untangling their bodies. When she pulled away, Mitch's eyes were haunted and bright. He didn't understand and at that moment neither did she. She couldn't make sense of what had happened to her in the past few months.

  They had been lovers when they were teenagers, but since she started seeing him this time, she had refused to let them make love again. She didn't think a relationship could be built on sex and little more. She wanted to make sure it worked with Mitch. She didn't want to rush into physical intimacy with him. It would break her heart again to sleep with him then have to let him go. Those had been her intentions in the beginning. Mitch had agreed but his patience was wearing thin.

  “When, Tal? When we're too old and feeble to enjoy it?” He stepped in close and kissed her again. “I want you, Talley. I want you more than that night when we were seventeen and I wanted you pretty damn bad then.”

  “Oh, Mitch, don't make it so hard.” Instead of pushing him away, she closed her eyes and let his lips trail down and settle on a spot where her neck and shoulder met. He suckled hard.

  “No!” She jerked away from him but it was too late. The lovebite stung. That was all she needed! Her hand covered the spot, felt the wet
ness of his saliva. “Grow up, Mitch!”

  Unconsciously, she used the same words she’d said to Jack Sandler.

  “Do you think I'm like Jack? Is that what you think, Tal, that that's all I want from you?”

  “Of course I don't think you're like Jack!”

  “Then what's wrong with you? You used to love it when I put one there, low enough so you could hide it from your mother. And when I left one here.” He lowered his mouth to her breast and tongued her nipple through her shirt.

  She pushed him away angrily and sat on the concrete steps. She rubbed the spot where he'd left his mark. “I'm not seventeen anymore. It's been six years and I've changed. That's what I mean, Mitch. We have to discover all the changes in both of us before we take such an important step. It was so hard saying good-bye the last time. I still remember what you said—”

  “Tal, I didn't mean it! I was so mad that your mother and stepfather were taking you away from me, all the way to Chattanooga. I always regretted saying it.”

  “You told me to go to hell.”

  “Because you wouldn't stay here and marry me. I was mad.”

  “We were only seventeen. We wouldn't have made it.”

  Mitch sat beside her without touching her.

  “I know that now. You were right and, hell, I knew it even then.” He moved close to her and put his arms around her. “I'm not going anywhere and neither are you this time. There won't be a good-bye.”

  “Maybe not, but I have to be sure. Please, Mitch, say good night and go home.”

  “I love you, Talley. I never stopped loving you, but I didn't realize it until I saw you again. That's all I need to know. I want to touch you and hold you and fill you up. I want you to want me.”

  “Sometimes love isn't enough and I want to find out before we get in over our heads again.”

  Mitch stared up at the sky. “You're not giving in on this, are you, Tal? Look, I didn't wait on you these last six years. Maybe I should have, but I didn't. I dated other women and I slept with them. I even thought I loved some of them. I didn't expect you to jump in bed with me on our first date, but I expected to make love to you again. I don't know how much longer I can wait.”