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Irresistible Attraction

Page 10

by Alison Kelly


  As curious as she’d been about Lisa’s mother before, Alessandra wished to heaven Bart would shut up now! The last thing she wanted was to hear him speaking in a voice laced with undeniable love for another woman. It was tearing her apart. She tried to mentally block out his words, yet they continued to permeate her mind.

  ‘Try as they might, Kath’s parents couldn’t keep us apart. I was her mother’s worst nightmare as far as potential son-in-laws went, but she knew she didn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of stopping me from marrying Kathleen.’

  He moved away from the fireplace to roam the room, not once looking at her, and Alessandra felt as if she’d become invisible as he lost himself in long ago memories. He spoke aloud, but it seemed to be more for his benefit than hers. Alessandra had never felt more alone in her entire life.

  ‘My uncle died, leaving me the ranch, only weeks before we were to marry, so I couldn’t spare the time for a honeymoon. Kath’s parents had paid for us to go to Hawaii for two weeks, but it was impossible.’

  He paused and she almost cried at the look of regret that washed across his weathered features. She’d never seen him look so desolate.

  ‘Kathleen had always dreamed of going to Hawaii and that was the only reason I swallowed my pride and agreed to accepting such an extravagant gift in the first place. But when my uncle died I felt I had too much on my plate here to waste time sunning in Hawaii. I promised I’d take her the following year no matter what.’ Bart ran a weary hand across his face, then looked at her. ‘You’ve been to Hawaii. What’s it like?’

  ‘You…never ended up going?’

  He shook his head. ‘Kathleen died before I had a chance to make good my promise.’

  ‘Oh, God.’ Her words were a strangled gasp. ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘Yeah. Me too.’

  For several seconds a heavy silence filled the room as neither spoke nor moved. Suddenly Alessandra felt as if she would pass out from lack of air as she fought to hold back tears. Tears for whom she wasn’t sure; they might have been for Bart, herself, or the death of a beautiful young bride, but, not wishing to dwell on the subject, she sprang to her feet.

  ‘I need some air.’

  Tonight the summer stars were concealed behind heavy clouds that continued to spill rain. She was tempted to return to the warmth of the fire inside or at least get her coat, but instead she sat down on the worn timber of the old porch and hugged her knees to her chest, her mind backtracking over what Bart had revealed.

  She wondered what he had been like before his wife’s death. Losing someone you loved was a painful experience and she knew firsthand that when death came without warning to cheat a young life out of their dreams it was even more devastating and hard to reconcile. Inevitably it changed one’s outlook and perspective on life, just as Jenni’s death had changed hers.

  It had taken a long time for her to come to terms with her best friend’s tragic death and it had also altered her values and beliefs. How had Kathleen’s death affected Bart? What facets of his personality had been remoulded by sorrow at the loss of the woman he loved?

  Did it matter? Would it in any way lessen the attraction she felt towards him? Alessandra couldn’t help smiling at the stupidity of her own thoughts. As if anything could! She was totally besotted by the man, dammit. She seemed to spend every second they were apart thinking about him and, on the rare occasions when he’d not been able to avoid her, praying he’d bestow just one of his heart-melting smiles on her.

  In the past she’d been critical of women who were so obsessed by a man that they’d have sold their soul to have them, yet she feared she was fast approaching that point herself. The idea both terrified and delighted her. Smiling to herself, she acknowledged that conflicting emotions seemed to be synonymous with her feelings for Bart Cameron. Whenever she recalled their lovemaking, which she did at least a dozen times a day and more so at night, she was consumed by warm sensual bliss, which turned to fury when she remembered the terse remarks he’d made only hours later.

  She stretched her legs out in front of her as she slumped more comfortably against the wall. Even if she could manage to change his opinion of her, how was she supposed to compete with an exquisitely beautiful ghost for his heart? Heck, she had never been one to back away from a fight, but, after seeing the depth of love Bart still had for Kathleen, Alessandra considered she probably had more chance of single-handedly ending the war in the Middle East.

  ‘If you’ve had enough air, I’ve made some fresh coffee. Interested?’

  Bart’s voice from the doorway startled her, but she recovered quickly and scrambled to her feet.

  ‘I’m interested.’

  ‘I’m not surprised; it’s chilly out here now.’ He looked up, searching the sky in all directions. ‘No sign of a break.’

  ‘Not yet,’ she agreed, standing beside him. ‘I…thanks for coming after me, Bart. I know you didn’t have to…’

  ‘Didn’t I?’ he asked, his eyes gazing into hers.

  He was inside before the implication of his words hit her. He wanted her, yet didn’t want her.

  Just because he thought they weren’t suited didn’t mean it was true. After all, he also assumed her past was littered with cast-off lovers, and that was far from the truth. Alessandra was used to people thinking that because her lifestyle was free and easy so was she, and it never bothered her, but Bart thinking the worst was a different matter. Somehow she was going to have to set the record straight.

  He was sitting at the table when she entered the room.

  ‘Ah! Warmth,’ she sighed, moving to stand before the fire. ‘Sometimes up here it’s hard to remember that this is supposed to be the summer.’

  ‘Don’t complain until you’ve experienced a West Texas winter,’ Bart said. ‘Speaking of which, where are you headed when you leave here?’

  Alessandra turned to him. ‘I haven’t given it much thought. Maybe New Zealand. I’d really like to have a stint at a thoroughbred stud there.’ She shoved her hands into the pockets of her jeans. ‘But leaving here won’t be easy for me,’ she said honestly.

  ‘I know what you mean; there’s something about this part of the world that kinda gets in your blood and stays there.’

  ‘Maybe it’s the people,’ Alessandra suggested as Bart’s gaze met hers. Lord, but he had the sexiest eyes she’d ever known; just having him look at her was sending her hormones into overdrive. But she knew her feelings for Bart had gone beyond being solely physical. Just when she wasn’t sure, but they had, and she sure as hell wasn’t giving up on them without a good fight.

  ‘Finish your coffee; we’re going.’

  His terse words exploded into her thoughts and when she mentally refocused he was already packing up the gear he’d brought.

  ‘But it’s still raining.’

  ‘It’s easing off,’ Bart said.

  ‘Easing off? It’s bloody pouring out there!’

  ‘Alessandra…I’m in no mood to argue about this,’ he warned.

  ‘Too bad, because I am! There is no way I am going to go out in that!’

  ‘You’re going.’

  ‘Pig’s bum I am!’

  Ignoring her, he began to douse the fire.

  ‘Leave that alone!’ she demanded, delivering a heavy thump to his arm.

  Bart sprang to his feet and grabbed hold of her forearms, only just managing to stop himself from shaking her.

  ‘Wake up to yourself, Alessandra. We can’t stay here.’

  ‘Why not? There’s a bed——’

  ‘That’s right—there’s a bed!’ he interrupted roughly. ‘And because there is we’d be giving the gossip-mongers a gift-wrapped present if we stayed ‘here.’

  ‘So I’m supposed to risk pneumonia to save your reputation?’

  Alessandra heard Bart curse under his breath and pushed her palms against his chest in an effort to free herself.

  ‘It’s not my reputation I’m worried about.’

  Alt
hough he still held her arms the hard grip was turning into a soft massage and the powerful, rapid beat of his heart against her hands was keeping perfect tempo with her own.

  ‘You’re worried about me?’

  ‘Don’t sound so surprised; I seem to spend most of my time lately worrying about you,’ Bart said, his eyes staring into hers.

  ‘Seems to me you spend most of your time avoiding me.’

  ‘That too,’ he admitted.

  Something drew them closer and Alessandra was forced to tilt her head slightly to maintain eye contact.

  ‘Why?’ she asked, moving her hands to his hips, a path of fire burning through her from the touch of his hands on her back. Instinctively she arched into him, feeling his hardness even through the denim they both wore.

  ‘Do you still need an answer?’ he muttered through clenched teeth. She shook her head, then rested it against his chest. ‘Alessandra?’

  ‘I don’t understand why you’re fighting this so hard.’ Her voice was muffled by his body, but, even to her own ears, her despair was evident.

  ‘At this minute neither do I.’

  ‘You…’

  Her words were swallowed by his kiss and the loud pumping of her blood. He held her as close as clothing would allow and nothing penetrated her senses save the taste, feel and scent of him and she held back nothing in her response. Her fingers moved feverishly through his hair as if desperately seeking to stroke every individual strand before her knees gave way, as surely they must, since every bone in her body was at melting-point. A feverish tide was spreading from wherever Bart touched her, radiating into every nerve of her body. When his work-hardened hands slipped beneath her shirt and began stroking the rise of her breast she was sure she would die from willing him to touch her already erect nipples. Her gasp of pleasure when he ceased his teasing and rolled the peaks between his fingers was smothered as again his tongue sought out the moistness of her mouth. She welcomed his invasion eagerly, alternately accepting his oral caresses with gentle submission and then aggressive response. She would never, never tire of the taste of this man.

  Yet she craved more. Her body was echoing her soul’s need to feel him more intimately and she stood on tiptoe and nudged herself against his arousal. When Bart tried to end the kiss she gave a hungry groan of resistance.

  ‘Easy, honey…let’s slow this dow——’

  ‘It’s too slow now!’ she insisted, her fingers fumbling with his belt buckle.

  Bart was in no condition to argue and quickly assumed the task of removing his clothes, while never taking his eyes off Alessandra as she began to undress with equal haste. The pure perfection of her slightly built body again amazed him, being so at odds with the tough, competent cowhand he knew her to be, but now as she stood naked before him he was incapable of imagining her any other way.

  Reverently he kissed the muted pink peaks of her breasts before raining a stream of kisses between them and down over her stomach. When he knelt to continue his task she halted his progress with a shaky hand.

  ‘I swear I’ll collapse if you do,’ she whispered in a voice weighted with desire. ‘I can barely stand now.’

  He responded by lifting her body into his arms and holding her pressed tightly against him as he carried her to the bed. He slowly lowered her the length of his body, his eyes darkening as she rubbed against his erectness. Keeping one arm around her waist, he reached for the clean blanket he’d brought and tossed it quickly over the worn mattress. Then he pressed her on to the bed and moved over her.

  ‘Oh, Alessandra,’ he sighed. ‘I don’t seem to have any control where you’re concerned.’

  ‘Good,’ she said, pulling his face closer. ‘Because I suffer the same lack of control when I’m around you.’

  There was an urgency in their passion that Alessandra hadn’t expected and found exciting. The possessiveness of Bart’s touch thrilled her blood and when he removed his hand from between her thighs to replace it with his kisses she was helpless to prevent her cries of carnal encouragement. The waves of ecstasy he created were washing over her with such intensity that she was certain her mind would explode. ‘Bart…I can’t…Barrrrt!’ And it did…in a magical mixture of music and stars that came through her body in shuddering spasms.

  She opened her eyes and immediately met his.

  ‘Wow,’ she whispered.

  He lifted her hand to his lips, but when he ran his tongue over her scratched palms he pulled a face.

  ‘I forgot we smeared them with antiseptic cream. It tastes awful.’

  She pulled him closer until his mouth was only a breath away from hers.

  ‘Kiss me and I promise it’ll taste good.’

  His groan of desire inspired her confidence and, slipping her right hand between them, she stroked him in rhythm with their thrusting tongues. Her fingers danced sensually over his muscled shoulders and down his back, revelling in the feel of his heated naked skin, stilling only when Bart’s mouth planted kisses down her neck before coming to rest on and suckle her breasts. Arching against him, she was dimly aware that once again her mind was being overpowered by her body.

  Just as she was about to demand his entry she felt his firmness deep inside; the unspoken words translated themselves to a moan of sheer pleasure.

  He was chanting her name as they absorbed each other’s release.

  She awoke to find him smiling and she knew immediately that waking alongside him every day for the rest of her life was the only thing she would ever want.

  ‘You don’t,’ Bart said as he dropped a kiss on her nose.

  ‘I don’t what?’

  ‘Talk in your sleep.’

  ‘You lay there the whole time watching me just to see if I talk in my sleep?’

  ‘No. Because I couldn’t take my eyes off you.’

  His mouth was warm and gentle against hers, but too quickly she felt him break the union. Muttering a protest, Alessandra snaked an arm around his neck, but although his smile indicated he wanted to take things further he was shaking his head.

  ‘The rain stopped about a half-hour ago; we’d better get going.’

  ‘You’re kidding! It’s——’ Alessandra glanced at her watch ‘—ten-fifteen!’

  ‘We’ll be there by midnight. Twelve-thirty at the latest.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know,’ she teased, rolling herself on to him and nuzzling his furred chest. ‘I think we should aim for making breakfast…at the earliest.’

  ‘Alessan…dra, no. We have to leave.’ His words were saying one thing, his body telling her something else.

  ‘Why? It’s not as if Lisa is by herself. Marilyn’s there.’

  ‘Precisely. I can do without Marilyn’s speculative glances and heavy-handed attempts at matchmaking.’

  ‘Don’t be an idiot, Marilyn isn’t the matchmaker type. She’s too liberated.’

  ‘Not where I’m concerned,’ Bart stated, rolling from the bed and gathering his clothes.

  ‘You’re paranoid,’ Alessandra told him.

  ‘Maybe, but being paranoid doesn’t necessarily mean they’re not out to get you! There’s nothing my big sister would like better than to see me married again. Well, she can count me out. God help my nephews when she starts lining up potential spouses for them.’

  When Alessandra emerged from the cabin, Bart already had the horses saddled. Although she had silently willed a return of the storm the whole time she was dressing, a glance at the star-littered sky told her such wishing had been in vain.

  Watching Bart adjust the saddle-bags, she wondered where this latest interlude would leave their relationship. After the first time they’d made love she’d naturally assumed they would continue as lovers, but Bart had been determined to keep as much distance as possible between them and instead they had endured a sort of cold war. As much as he denounced any interest in having an affair with her, he’d now revealed he was equally opposed to marriage. So where did that leave them? Bart was already astride his horse, but
as she moved to mount Pewter his arm stopped her.

  ‘Climb up in front of me.’

  His eyes were shadowed by the brim of his hat, so Alessandra was left to wonder at the gentleness she heard in his voice.

  ‘Won’t our riding in double raise Marilyn’s speculative eyebrows?’ she teased, even as a group of butterflies bounced against the walls of her stomach.

  ‘Pewter looks a little lame. Don’t you think so?’

  She grinned as she looked at the perfectly healthy horse.

  ‘Hard to say, but let’s not take any chances.’ She raised a hand so he could haul her up on to his horse.

  It was just after midnight when they made their way into the yard surrounding the house. Only the exterior lights of the various sheds were on and Bart reined to a halt some fifty yards from the porch. They’d ridden the entire way without speaking a word, but pressed tightly against each other. Each time she’d been about to break the silence Bart had given her a gentle squeeze, as if reading her mind. His touch seemed to implore her not to voice the question she most needed to ask and he least wanted to answer: where did tonight’s episode leave them?

  She turned her head, bringing her face into contact with the exposed skin at the base of his neck. His masculine scent left her almost dizzy, yet she breathed in deeply, enjoying the sensual high it created within her.

  ‘I’ll see to the horses; you scoot up and have a warm shower.’

  ‘The ride’s over, uh?’

  Her question hung between them, weighted with both hope and regret. Tilting her head, she met his eyes before leaning to accept his kiss.

  It was soft and tentative, but also charged with desire, and she lost herself in the taste of him. When Bart finally broke the contact between them, his tiny sigh was music to her soul.

  ‘Goodnight, Alessandra.’

  ‘It could get even better,’ she suggested, sliding a finger down his cheek and across his lips.

  Strong as the temptation was to take her into the stable and spend the remainder of the night making love to her in the hay, Bart was still too shocked by the sensations this woman ignited within him to trust them. He was unable to recall a time in his adult life when he hadn’t been totally in control of his feelings and emotions; now a snowy-haired Australian had somehow infiltrated the core of his very structured life. He couldn’t understand why Alessandra should affect him in such a way, because on the surface everything about her was coarse and unfeminine, yet the more he got to know her the more potent her appeal became. He closed his eyes to block out her partly opened lips and her desire-filled eyes, so he could muster his defences.

 

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