West

by Michele G Miller

  “You’re going to tell them though, right? I mean, they don’t hate me or something, do they?”

  “West! Of course not.” She kisses me as if those lips are going to change the subject. “They think you’re awesome. You saved me, remember?”

  I barely hear her words because her dang lips did change the subject and now I’m wrapping my arms around her and kissing her back. My mouth works at hers until she gives in and deepens the kiss. Today was perfect.

  We’re two for two, Jules and I, and all I can think about is having another day like this with her tomorrow—perhaps without a Star Wars movie marathon and a little brother then it hits me.

  “Shoot,” I groan, backing away from our kiss. “I completely forgot to tell you I’ll be gone for the weekend. My dad and I are getting up early and heading to the big game at A&M.”

  Jules’ face crumbles. “I’m jealous,” she rubs her cheek against my chest. “So I won’t see you until Monday?”

  Ugh! Three days. Why does that sound like torture? Normally Dad and I wouldn’t head up until late Friday night or early Saturday, but with school out our plans changed. Dad needed an extra day at the school for some broadcast interviews he wanted to do. He’d mentioned it Tuesday night, and since Jules and I weren’t speaking at the time, and he’d caught me after my full day of work labor, I didn’t think to disagree with him.

  “Yeah. My oldest brother, Carson, and his girlfriend, Mindy, live about thirty minutes from campus, so we always stay at their place after the games. Austin lives there too, kinda, and he usually gets to hang too. It’s a lot of manly stuff. We probably won’t head back until late Sunday. I’ll see if I can guilt Dad into coming back earlier so I can stop by.”

  “No, don’t do that. See your brothers and have a good time. I’ll be sitting here withering away without you.”

  “Jules?” I use her name so she knows I’m absolutely, one hundred percent serious when I speak. “Every minute I’m not with you, I’m thinking about you and wanting to be with you.”

  “Me too,” she confesses her lips kissing mine goodnight.

  Twenty-Four

  Me: Usually I look forward to A&M football weekends

  Me: I think you’ve ruined it for me. I want to stay home with your lips

  Me: and your hand

  Me: and not in a dirty way!

  I send the texts to Jules as my dad’s truck veers onto the highway. I’m not surprised at the lack of a response since it’s 8:00 A.M. I’d be asleep too if my dad hadn’t forced me into the car this early so he could make a lunch meeting with his producers.

  Me: of course, we could discuss the dirty things.

  Me: I’m game ;)

  “What’s got you smiling this early,” Dad asks from beside me.

  “Eh, I amuse myself,” I wave my phone in the air for him to see I’m texting.

  “Jules?”

  “Yeah. Well, kind of. She’s not answering so I’m actually having a one-sided conversation.” I pocket the phone and reach into the bag of donuts we picked up before leaving town.

  Dad shakes his head. “It’s good to see a smile on your face.”

  “It’s good to have one.”

  Jules: I’m not sure where to begin with those texts.

  Her reply arrives halfway into our three-hour drive.

  Me: Well, good morning Sleeping Beauty.

  Jules: its 9:30, its not like I slept all day. Plus, I needed it

  Me: yeah, you did.

  Jules: And I was having this great dream. I’m kinda sad I woke up

  Me: really? About what??

  Jules: wouldn’t you like to know. You there yet?

  Me: Hey! Don’t change the subject.

  Jules: hahaha. I’ll tell you all about it next time we talk.

  Me: damn. I’m calling as soon as I get to the house.

  Jules: No you are not. You’re spending time with your brothers.

  Me: I spent time with them last weekend

  Jules: West.

  Me: Jules.

  She doesn’t reply. I relent.

  Me: I’ll spend time with them, but I’m calling you as soon as I’m alone. Deal?

  Jules: Fine. Showering now.

  She ends her text with one of those kissy faces. Normally I’m annoyed by the over usage of emojis, but from Jules I can deal. Not only do I deal, but I deign to send her back a winky face. Then I delete the evidence, just in case.

  “You’re smiling again,” Dad points out.

  “She makes me happy.”

  He clears his throat, but I can tell he’s merely covering the pause in his thoughts. “So, you two worked things out then,” he asks.

  “Worked what out?” I haven’t told him much about Jules and I. Austin knows the most and he wouldn’t spill it.

  “Should I give you your play by play for the last week?” I frown as he looks over at me. “First, I should mention how you were extra cranky after Tanya’s funeral. Which is understandable, considering the circumstances, but then you ran out of the house all excited only to return an hour later pissed at the world. Next, you spent the weekend pretending you were happy, but Austin’s whispers and worried glances proved otherwise, as did your imbibing at the Sig party.”

  “Dad—”

  His hand goes up. “We have an agreement, West. You be responsible, you don’t drive, you don’t get into any trouble, and I won’t come down hard on you. I’m not talking about drinking right now, though. I’m talking about your change in attitude. You sulked all weekend, you ran off as soon as we got home Monday to go to Jeff’s. You started a conversation with me about Jules and your mother. Then you threw yourself into work Tuesday and Wednesday. After all of that you disappeared yesterday only to return home being downright cheerful. Exactly how you’ve been this morning. So, either you’re on drugs or something has changed. And since I’ve witnessed the way your eyes light up when you see Jules Blacklin, I can only presume she’s the reason for this smile.”

  Wow. I sound certifiable when he lays it all out that way. “I haven’t kept you in the loop, huh?” It’s more of a statement than a question. I scratch my knuckles across my jaw as I think of how to respond. “Sorry.”

  “Are things okay?”

  I nod. “They’re better now.”

  “How is she doing, still suffering from her concussion?”

  “She’s feeling okay actually. She doesn’t remember everything yet, but she’s had flashes. She doesn’t seem to have any other side effects. Remember how sick I used to get after the concussion I had in middle school? I couldn’t stand up too quickly for weeks without getting dizzy.”

  “I had my fair share back in the day, too. Each one was unique and came with different recovery periods. How is she dealing with Tanya’s death?” His eyes stay on the road as he questions me.

  “Honestly, we haven’t talked about it.”

  I chew on the inside of my cheek. I spent the last two days with Jules and we didn’t talk about the tornado or all that’s transpired in the last two weeks. We’ve kind of acted as though none of that happened, as though we were two normal teens who fell for each other. Ignorance is bliss, right?

  “And we’re here.”

  I look up as we pull into the drive of our college pad. That’s what my brothers and I call it. It was the bachelor pad until Mindy moved in with Carson a year ago. I smile thinking about living here every time we pull up to this house.

  “One more year.”

  “You so ready to be rid of your old man?” I didn’t realize I’d made the comment out loud. I laugh as I pull my duffle from the back of the truck and follow him to the front door.

  “Not at all. I just can’t believe this time next year I’ll be at school here. I can’t believe this is my last weekend before senior year.” Shit, I’m feeling crazy sentimental these days.

  My mind wanders to Jules and I wonder about her plans for school next year. I’ve assumed she would be going to A&M, I’m sure I heard her
say it before, but I’m not so sure. There’s so much we’ve yet to discuss about ourselves. We moved headfirst into this deep connection without sharing ourselves.

  “Alright, I’m heading to campus for my meeting. Do you want to come track down Austin or are you going to stay here?”

  I drop my bag by the front door and head for the kitchen. “Nah, Austin told me he’d come here after the team walk-thru.”

  “I’ll see you in a couple hours then,” he waves, locking the door as he leaves.

  Grabbing a bottled soft drink, I grab my bag and carry it to my room. I throw myself on the bed thinking a nap would be perfect. After running on empty for two weeks, I’m exhausted from the turmoil, the physical labor, and the nightmares plaguing my sleep. I yawn, kicking off my shoes, then Jules enters my mind. Not Jules so much as the dream she said she would tell me about. Then I think about her plans for next year and the fact that I’m all alone, and I pull my phone from my pocket and dial.

  “Hey,” she answers on the third ring, drawing out the word into three long, singsong syllables.

  “Where are you going to school next year,” I ask, not bothering with pleasantries.

  “Uh, A&M. Why?”

  “A&M, really? You’re for sure on that?”

  Jules laughs. “Yes, I’m very sure. I had early acceptance this year. You sound a little crazy. What’s up?”

  I smack myself in the forehead, feeling like an idiot. “Sorry, my dad and I were talking about next year and it dawned on me that I had no idea what your plans were for college. Whenever I come here I get excited about the future. Today for the first time I paused when I saw the house because for a second I worried about how maybe your plans wouldn’t be the same as mine.”

  “Awe,” she sings into the line. “You really do like me, don’t you?”

  “You’re okay.”

  “Just okay? Well I guess you don’t really want to hear about my dream, do you?” she teases.

  Well hell, checkmate.

  “Remember how I told you I have a top ten list of why I’m happy you’re in my life?” I ask. “Number ten is you make me smile.”

  “The feeling is mutual.”

  “Good, so tell me about this dream of yours,” I order, stacking the pillows behind my head and adjusting myself on the bed.

  Jules chuckles. I hear rustling through the phone and a door click before she replies. “Well, it involves our favorite corn field, very little clothing, and a whole lot of R-rated material.”

  “R-rated for violence and language?”

  “Definitely not for violence and language.”

  Closing my eyes, I picture Jules’ red hair spread across her pale skin, and my body is immediately awake. “Maybe, we should save this conversation for when I’m not three hours away from you,” I groan.

  Her musical laughter turns me on more and I pull a pillow over my head. “It seems to me this might be the perfect time to tell you.”

  ‘Why? So I can’t attack you?”

  “Precisely.” She laughs lightly, but I don’t.

  She doesn’t remember our conversation when we were trapped so she doesn’t know I know she’s a virgin. She doesn’t know how amazed I am by this either. I’m no saint and I don’t ever want her to feel like I would force her into anything.

  “Jules?”

  Her laughter fades at my use of her name. “Yeah?”

  “I know I tease you with dirty jokes and comments, but I want you to know I would never pressure you into anything. If talking dirty bothers you at all just tell me to stop. Okay?”

  “Boy, your parents raised you right,” she sighs. I wait for her to continue, but she doesn’t. A moment later I hear her mother’s voice and her mumbled reply.

  “So, I’ve committed myself to a day with my mother.”

  “Well you go have fun then and I’ll talk to you later.”

  “M’kay.”

  I’m about to say goodbye when she stops me. “Hey, West? I trust you.”

  She hangs up and I smile at the ceiling. Fifteen minutes later I fall asleep and dream of her barely clothed in our corn field, and damn if it isn’t a good dream.

  “Remember Amy from the Sig party?” Austin asks as we’re sitting around the backyard fire pit after dinner.

  “Uh, not really. If you recall, I had a lot to drink.”

  “Ha, right. Well, she does this thing where she rubs my—”

  “Whoa, whoa,” I shout, nearly falling backwards in my chair. “I do not want to hear what you have chicks rubbing.”

  “Who’s rubbing what?” asks Carson as he steps onto the back patio with a beer in hand. I point at Austin who groans.

  “Amy is rubbing my back, you dirty bastards.” Carson and I share skeptical looks and Austin leans forward, throwing another log into the fire. “She’s a physical therapy major. Geez, you two must be hard up,” he growls.

  “Suuuurrre, therapy major,” Carson and I echo with laughter, exchanging a fist bump.

  “Uh, engaged and living in sin. I think I’m good, bro,” Carson points out as he pulls a chair around the other side of the fire. The metal legs make a horrible scraping sound against the brick pavers of the patio and I cringe. It’s like nails on a chalkboard echoing into the otherwise quiet night.

  “West?” Austin prods, as though I would admit to being hard up.

  They’re both looking at me with expectant faces. “Why the hell you looking at me? I’m not talking about my sex life with you two.”

  “So you admit there’s a sex life?” asks Austin.

  “Shut up.” I wish I had something to throw at him.

  “Dude, just don’t tie yourself down before you get up here next year. Carson tapped out on me way to early. I need a wing man.”

  Apparently I suck at hiding things from my brothers. Austin sits forward, his eyes narrow and his lips twitch into a smile as he studies my face. “You made a move didn’t you?”

  “What? On Jules?” asks Carson as he looks from Austin to me. What does he know about Jules?

  Damn it, siblings can be a pain.

  “Mindy and her big mouth,” I mutter. “Or was it you?” I ask Austin, wondering who filled Carson in on the situation with Jules and I.

  Austin shakes his head. “My lips are sealed.”

  Carson chuckles. “You must think we’re all deaf and blind. We were worried about you, West.”

  I’m not mad. I love my brothers and my dad. They’re the three people I know I can count on for anything in my life. I don’t know why I don’t talk to them more about how I’ve been coping. Especially Carson and my dad, except that I recall how they were after my mom’s death. Austin is more like me—carefree and screws around too much—but Carson is responsible. He became a second father figure when I was dealing with my mom’s death. He’s an adult now, with a college degree and a serious girlfriend. Sometimes I find it harder to confide in him. Sometimes I just want to be allowed to wallow and act stupid instead of hearing sound advice.

  “Austin would have told you if there was something serious to worry about. I’m good,” I tell Carson before looking at Austin’s curious face. “And yes, I made a move.”

  “And?” he prods.

  “And—I’m whipped.” I shrug, stretching my legs out before me as though I could care less about my self-diagnosis as my brothers laugh.

  Giving them the Spark Notes version, I tell them about Jules and Stuart, and fill them in on the connection we felt from the moment we saw each other the night of the storm. I tell them how I stupidly fought it and how I eventually gave in, thanks in part to Mindy telling me to not be scared to fall in love.

  “I told you you aren’t a screw up,” Austin chuckles.

  “I’m still totally a screw up and I’m worried she’s going to rethink being with me one of these days, but I don’t care. I’m all in.” The flames flicker across their faces as I admit my feelings. “There’s something about her, she makes me want things.”

  “Th
at’s your testosterone talking. Didn’t Dad tell you about the bird and the bees?” Austin slaps his knee, cracking himself up.

  Carson’s long leg stretches out to kick at Austin’s shin. “Ignore him, he’s still got the mentality of a thirteen-year-old boy.”

  Cursing Carson and rubbing his shin, Austin checks his phone. Letting out a deep breath, he jumps to his feet. “I’ve got team curfew; I should head out.”

  “Kick ass tomorrow,” Carson offers as they exchange a fist bump.

  I stand and pull him in for a hug, telling him what I always tell him before his games. “Run like the wind, Bullseye.”

  “Always,” he agrees with a nod.

  And he does. He scores twice in Saturday’s game as Carson, Mindy, and I cheer in the stands. Football Saturdays at A&M—the Rutledge family lives for these. I pull my phone out of my pocket when I have a moment during a timeout and send Jules a couple texts.

  Me: Reason #9 - your smile. I close my eyes and I see it. It makes me happy.

  Me: Reason #8 - the crease in your forehead when you’re thinking. It’s damn sexy.

  Play resumes and I pocket my phone, getting back into the game. I don’t check my phone again until much later.

  Jules: You have this smile . . . I call it the signature West look. It melts me every time. And, you think my forehead crease is sexy? I suppose this bodes well for me if we end up old and gray together.

  My smile hurts my face, it’s so wide.

  Me: #7 - you admit we might just make it together long enough to end up old and gray