by N. K. Love
“So you’re not walking out on me. We’re not over.”
“I didn’t say that either, Jax. Right now, I can’t see a way through this. I swear to God, I’m hurting so much and there’s no denying that it’s because of you.”
I move back to face him and we hold hands at our sides, interlinking our fingers. The touch of his skin… He is everything to me and he feels the same about me. I know he does.
“I’m so sorry, Angel.”
“Jax—I know that you love me.” His brow furrows a little in shock. “I know that when you took that shot in Devon, it was me you were talking about. You won’t tell me because you don’t want it to be this way—under these circumstances. But I just need you to know, that I already know. I see it every time you look into my eyes. I see it in that secret smile you reserve especially for me. I don’t need to hear it Jax—I can feel it. I can.”
“Beth—”
“I’m saying this so that you know when I walk out of that door now, I am going fully aware of what’s at stake. I just need space and time. But most of all, I need to be away from you for however long it takes.”
My tears have since faded and the knot in my stomach seems more bearable somehow. I know that I have to do this. Walking away from him is going to be one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
I reach up to kiss him.
Our lips slowly press together and I close my eyes. The softness of his beautiful lips against me is incomparable. Kissing him is as easy as breathing and arguably as important.
I deepen the kiss giving him permission to do the same. He takes control subtly and allows his tongue to caress my mouth. Slowly and sensually, making love to my mouth with his. He shows me in a kiss, how much I mean to him.
I’ve managed to block out all of the crap that’s just happened between us. That needed to be set aside for a few short minutes whilst I let myself unashamedly fall in love with this kiss, over and over.
The pure emotion that flows between us is raw and authentic.
My hands wander slowly all over his body. Embedding every ridge of every muscle into my head again.
“Beth.” He speaks between kissing. “Why are you memorizing this?”
He talks without breaking contact and I feel the flutter of his breath on my skin.
“I need to.”
“It’s not necessary.”
“You don’t know that.” I whisper and then kiss him again and again.
Jax pulls away and holds my face, looking me determinedly in the eye. I see confidence there but I also see sadness and some doubt. He knows that could have been our last kiss just as much as I do.
“Beth, I know you want space but I don’t want to let you go.”
“I love you, Jaxson.”
I pick up my bag and open the door. When I take a step through it, I become frozen to the spot. This is the hardest part.
I turn back to face him and let that all-important word ‘goodbye’ leave my lips. But Jax rushes forward, slamming into my body. He wraps his arms around me and kisses me with a fire that knocks me off kilter. Lifting me up in a tight, passionate embrace. His kiss is unrestricted. It’s overwhelming, full of love and need.
It’s our relationship represented in a kiss. It’s beautiful.
No matter what has happened in our lives, this love right here is undeniable.
I pull away as he grounds my feet. I feel more emotional now than before, yet this time there’s no tears. I’m beyond tears. Jax rubs our noses from side to side, with our foreheads pressing together. The intensity in his eyes is mesmerising. God, I love this man so fucking much but how can I accept that he is going to kill somebody?
Unlike me, my tears still don’t fall.
But I have.
I have fallen.
“I will catch you, Angel. Whether you let me or not.”
What’s Next?
Thank you so much for reading Fallen Angel, book three of The List Series. Beth’s journey certainly isn’t taking us along the easy route?
You’re all set to finish Beth’s journey in style with the last instalment of The List Series. Always Angel (#4) will soon be ready and waiting patiently to take you on the final ride of The List Series with Beth. Please add me on social media and follow my Amazon author page for future updates about Always Angel (#4).
When the time comes, I can promise that you’ll need to brace yourself for a white knuckle finale. All you need are fingers for crossing, some breath for gasping and a pair of lovely lips for biting.
For news and updates be sure to follow me on Instagram @novelkindoflove and add my Facebook page, Novel Kind of Love. I also have a Facebook closed group for readers who’ve read beyond Lost Angel, it’s Jax’s Angels, so please join that group to meet other readers of the series and have some fun!
I’d be really grateful if you took a moment to leave a rating and a review. It doesn’t have to be long but reviews are very much appreciated so thank you.
Many thanks for giving your precious time to reading what I’ve written. That concept still blows my mind.
The Author
N K Love is a sucker for a beautiful romance, especially when it comes with a bucketful of face fanning. Her partner doesn’t share her obsession and there’s always eye rolling whenever she gets giddy or teary over a great scene in a book or on screen. When she isn’t reading or writing, she’s probably being a child with her children or being a loner with her coin collection. Yes, I said coin collection, don’t laugh!
Follow N K Love on Instagram @novelkindoflove for tempting teasers and daily interaction. I’d really love to hear from you, so drop me a message on there or over on my Facebook page – Novel Kind of Love.
Acknowledgements
Firstly, a huge amount of gratitude to you, whoever you are. You are lovely. I’ve no idea what led you to picking this book but whatever it was, thank you! I often cross my fingers and hope that my books reach the eyes of like-minded people who will embrace the characters just like I do. Smiling is infectious and I really hope I can put smiles on faces of strangers.
To my social media peeps. I can count on my hands the amount of people who know who N K Love really is. So you guys are pretty much the only people I interact with about writing on a daily basis. You won’t realise that your support means so much to me.
A very special mention to the founders of Jax’s Angels Audrey, Lex and Em – Your selflessness and sheer loveliness is awe-inspiring. #3FS #justtoclarify #angelhugs #insyncangels #honorarybrit #honoraryredneck #portabellend #Jaxtime #noasparagus #wormary #tribeforlife To name but a few! I absolutely love you girls.
To my real life heartthrob and alpha-male, who lets me dive into my crazy, beautiful book world whenever possible and who inspired me to create that world in the first place. You have and will always be my ‘4eva always’.
To my children, for continuing to blossom beautifully, even when Mommy was attempting to blossom a book… or four. You are my reasons for striving. Thank you for always reminding me not to take life too seriously.
To my big sister, the recipient of many random conversations when I wanted to bounce filthy ideas off her. I’m sorry your little sister isn’t as sweet and innocent as some would like to believe. Thank you for being the person to say ‘go for it’ and during the darker days, ‘keep going’. I needed to hear that.
To my little sister, who never got bored of hearing me say ‘Please can you…?’ and who continually comes through for me. My social media guru and technical genius. Having you at my fingertips has been imperative and I can’t thank you enough.
To Kimberley for the amazing proofreading—you are truly awesome—and for telling me when you had to take a cold shower, that always gave me the boost I needed. Thank you for lending me your brain and your precious time, for I will be eternally grateful for your invaluable contributions.
The List
Fuck It List
1. Blowjob
2. Handjob
&nbs
p; 3. Cunnilingus
4. Sex in a workplace
5. Sex in a car
6. Sex in the shower
7. Multiple orgasm
8. Get a tattoo
9. Get a piercing
10. Sex on the beach
11. Phone sex
12. Cybersex / Sexting
13. Tantric sex
14. Get stoned
15. Use food / ice sexually
16. 69
17. Kiss a girl
18. Tie somebody up
19. Be tied up
20. Watch a porno alone
21. Watch a porno with a partner
22. Do a lap dance
23. Do a strip tease
24. Sexual role-play
25. Make a sex tape
26. Sex outdoors
27. Go to strip show / live sex show
28. Be spanked
29. Hit somebody
30. Kinky sex
