Wicked Nights

by Nina Bangs

  “I don’t know what happened. The last thing I remember is someone spraying something in my eyes that burned like hell. Next thing I know, I’m sitting here at the table. So who’s going to explain this?” He glared at his friends.

  Donna eased away from them and headed for her room. She was fooling herself if she thought she could ever belong to their inner group. Not that she’d want to. Conall would be perfectly okay with leaving Taurin in that field once he got the facts, because like the others, he belonged to a time when sudden and brutal death was the norm. She didn’t know how to think like them. The sad part? This was only one example of how much separated her from Eric.

  She was so busy worrying about Eric, Taurin, and why the hell it all mattered so much, that she almost bumped into Holgarth.

  “Ah, just the manipulator of millions I wanted to talk to.” Holgarth’s smile was a little too pleasant.

  Uh-oh. “I don’t have time to talk, Holgarth. I have to change before my show.”

  “Your show. Exactly why I wanted to speak with you.” He reached up to straighten his wizard’s hat, which she assumed had slipped a millimeter off center. “I would like to be your guest tonight.”

  Donna had been eyeing his hat and remembering that during the wind and rain tonight it had stayed firmly planted in place. Maybe when he took it off at night, his head came with it.

  Wait. What had Holgarth said? “You want to be a guest?”

  “I hate repeating myself.” His thin lips tightened in disapproval of anyone who didn’t get what he said the first time. “I couldn’t help but notice that you’ve only had one guest from the castle, and as fond as I am of Eric, he was a disaster. He had nothing to say. I, on the other hand, have much to say.”

  “I don’t know. . . .”

  “You came all the way from New York to broadcast from here, so it seems logical that your listeners would want to hear from someone actually connected to the castle.” He offered her another thin-lipped smile, as though it pained him to move his mouth muscles into the appropriate position. “You wouldn’t want to disappoint your listeners.”

  Relief washed over her. “But I do have guests connected to the castle. Amanda and Conleth Maguire are stopping by tonight, and they have some great stories to tell about when they were working here.”

  Something sly and triumphant moved in Holgarth’s eyes. “Oh, I’m terribly sorry. I forgot to pass on their message. They won’t be able to make it tonight. An unfortunate accident involving broken water pipes. They’re busy stemming the rising tide while they wait for a plumber.” He shrugged. “So I suppose you need another guest.”

  Donna narrowed her eyes. He may as well have hissed, “Gotcha.” Because he was a sneaky snake, and she knew exactly who was responsible for those broken pipes. But she also knew her listeners would expect a guest. She sighed. “Okay, you’re it. But you don’t talk about Eric, Brynn, or Conall. And I assume you have the common sense to stay away from what happened tonight.” She assumed no such thing and would be ready to cut him off the air at a moment’s notice.

  Holgarth’s smile widened just a little. Donna could almost hear the creak of unused muscles. “My, we have become protective of Eric, haven’t we?”

  Donna felt like . . . like knocking his hat off. Holgarth brought out her inner brat. “We need to get our butts in motion so that we can be on time for the show.”

  Turning away, she headed for the elevator. All the way up to her floor, worries about Eric, Taurin, and Holgarth tumbled around in her head. Those thoughts fled, however, as she stepped off the elevator and froze. Her door was open and the lights were on. Donna should’ve felt fear, but all she felt was outrage. As if her whole world wasn’t screwed up enough, some slimeball was in her room.

  She blasted into the room propelled by righteous anger and the need to pound on someone until she felt better. There, who said she couldn’t compete with the barbarian hordes downstairs? “Okay, dirtbag, what’re you doing in my—”

  Deimos straightened from studying Sweetie Pie and Jessica, his eyes wide with alarm. Which was so weird when you considered he could probably squash her with one finger. But she was mad and motivated.

  “Who gave you the right to barge into my room? Does Sparkle know you’re here?” She advanced on him, and he watched her warily.

  “Uh, no. Uh, sometimes I work for the owner of this place when Sparkle doesn’t need me.” He edged toward the door, but Donna planted herself firmly in his path. “The owner told Holgarth that I should, uh, check on all the plants once a week. I checked all the plants in the castle except these.”

  “Right. So you just barge into my room without my permission?” Donna had to look up a long way to meet his gaze. Maybe she needed to calm down a little. He could probably pick her up with one hand and shake her like a castanet if he got really ticked. Besides, she had a show to do and a dying vampire to angst over. “What’s your take on the plants?”

  “A little droopy. I guess they need more stuff happening in the room.” Red crept up his neck. “Umm, I don’t want to get really graphic here, but I could tell you a few ways to cheat if you don’t have time for all that”—he made a vague gesture toward the bed—“stuff. It won’t fool the plants for long, but it’ll, you know, help.” He shrugged his massive shoulders.

  Fascinated in spite of herself, Donna raised a questioning brow. “I’m all for fooling the plants. Let’s hear it.”

  “Sparkle’s been making sure I know all the ways to, umm, you know.” He frowned. “I’d rather go to action-hero school. Anyway, she gave me CDs with sounds people make when they’re having a really good time. And she made me watch videos showing people doing it in a lot of different ways. I could lend them to you, and you could play them for the plants.” His expression brightened. “You could try talking dirty to them.”

  If Donna didn’t spend so much time listening to the weird and wacky on her show, her mouth would be hanging open. “Deimos, why won’t you say the word sex?”

  The red crept up his face and washed over the top of his head. “It embarrasses me. I’m only four years old, dammit.” After dropping that bombshell, he strode past Donna and out the door.

  Donna stood for a moment trying to make sense of what had just happened. In a daze, she walked over and closed the door. Had Deimos actually said he was four years old? Was there a portal to hell beneath the castle attracting everything bizarre in the universe?

  But she didn’t have time to think about it right now. Any minute now Ken would be pounding on her door wanting to know if she’d forgotten she had a show to do. Slipping into a light swirly girly dress—may as well play into Eric’s image of her as soft civilized fluff—she finished off by blow-drying her hair into submission. A little lipstick and mascara, and she was as good as she was going to get tonight.

  She paused and took a deep breath. And what was she going to do about Taurin?

  Before rushing from the room, she looked over at Sweetie Pie and Jessica. “Dream of hot guys with big cocks, long tongues, and magic fingers, girls.” She’d have to practice her dirty talk, but that should keep them happy until she finished tonight’s show.

  “So, Holgarth, you’re the castle’s resident wizard. Tell us a little about yourself.” Donna had decided that if Holgarth chose to reveal who he really was, she’d let him. As long as he left Eric, Brynn, and Conall out of his disclosure, he could rattle on all night.

  He’d generate interest in the castle without implicating Eric in any way. She owed this much to the owner who’d allowed her to broadcast from his, her, or possibly its castle. Eric would be mad at her for putting Holgarth on the air, but then Eric was already mad and likely to get madder.

  “I’ve been a wizard for seven hundred years, and rarely during those seven hundred years have I seen a nation so in need of experienced leadership.” He offered his puzzled audience a withering stare meant to discourage any dissenting viewpoints.

  Donna blinked. “Well, that’s rea
lly interesting, but I don’t—”

  “Therefore I’ve decided to declare my candidacy for the office of President of the United States in 2008.” He remained silent for a moment, allowing the horror to sink in.

  Horror at least where Donna was concerned. She couldn’t get the mental picture of a dour Holgarth staring at her naked self from Air Force One. Ick. “That’s really admirable, Holgarth, but I think everyone would like to hear—”

  “Please stop interrupting me.” No one could make a person feel more like a ketchup stain on a white dress than Holgarth.

  Donna held up her hand. “Sure. No problem”—you bossy old fart.

  “I heard that thought.” It didn’t seem to have hurt his feelings, but then his feelings were probably made of tempered steel. “The first thing I’d do as president is disband the military. Why spend billions when I can dispose of our enemies during a commercial break before the eighth inning of a Phillies game?” He pulled his wand from beneath his robe. “This, my friends, is the only true weapon of mass destruction.” He made a leisurely swipe through the air with it.

  “Nothing happened.” Ah-hah! Phony. Donna chalked one up for her side.

  “Of course it did.” He offered his audience another tight smile. Voters wanted charm and charisma, not a wizard who looked like his tightie whities were constricting certain vital organs. “Each of you has an extra ten dollars in your wallet.” He looked faintly bored as everyone reached for their wallets and then oooed and aahhed over their ten-dollar bills. “Because I can save billions by simply waving my wand, those savings can be passed onto everyone in the form of lower taxes.”

  “You’re buying voters?” Donna kept her voice to a whisper so her mike wouldn’t pick it up. “That’s despicable.”

  He raised one eyebrow. “Is there any other way to win an election?”

  A half hour later Donna knew more than she ever wanted to know about Holgarth’s brave new world. At least while Holgarth had been explaining his economic and health policies she’d had time to come to a decision about Taurin.

  Once Donna opened the lines to callers, the night flew by. The show was almost over, and Donna thought she was home free, when the pod woman called. Great. Just freakin’ great. Almost four hours of listening to Holgarth go on about the power of his wand—so elect the wand president, for crying out loud—and now she had to listen to this woman’s tale of crazy sex with a creature of the night.

  Repeat after me, I am a professional. “Hey, Linda. I’m glad you called in.” Lying just got easier and easier. “What’s been happening in your life?” Now would be a good time for a long station break. She glanced at Ken from the corner of her eyes. He grinned and shook his head. No help there.

  “I have a horrible problem, and I thought maybe Holgarth could help me.” Linda sounded close to tears.

  “I’m quite capable of solving any problem, Linda. Remember that when you go to the polls in 2008.” Holgarth was in complete politician mode. Any minute now he’d ask the audience if they had any babies he could kiss.

  “I’ve fallen in love with one of the vampires who took me for a night of incredible sex. He feels the same way about me, but we have a problem. I want to become like him, but he belongs to a clan that can’t turn humans.” Sounds of soft sobbing. “I don’t want him to have to watch me grow old and die. What should I do? And please don’t tell me to give him up.”

  A problem? No kidding. Donna didn’t think she wanted to hear this. Linda’s human-falling-in-love-with-vampire scenario made her nervous. She was not in love with Eric, but she, well, liked him, and she had sort of wondered . . .

  “Ah, a complicated but not impossible situation.” Holgarth’s voice was as close to warm as it would ever get, which meant it was still frosty around the edges.

  Donna figured even an hour in the microwave wouldn’t defrost him completely. That was just her opinion, of course.

  “All vampires aren’t the same, Linda. You must find a vampire belonging to a group that can change humans. I’m sure for a reasonable monetary reward you can convince one of them to share his blood with you. Do make sure you don’t let him bite you, though, because once he’s taken your blood you’ll quite literally belong to him. This would not bode well for your future relationship with your beloved.” Holgarth adjusted his hat again. Sheesh, he was as bad as Sparkle with her nails.

  “But how do I get his blood? I can’t bite him.” Linda had stopped sobbing.

  Holgarth looked like he was getting bored with Linda’s inability to handle details. “You simply find someone with a bit of medical knowledge willing to draw some of the vampire’s blood and transfer it to you.”

  “But-but what if the vampire doesn’t have my blood type?”

  Holgarth surrendered to his need to do some eye-rolling. He’d have to control that urge once he reached the presidential debates. Eye-rolling didn’t play well in the polls.

  “Once you have the vampire’s blood, my dear Linda, you will be a vampire, too. Blood type will be irrelevant.” Holgarth looked as though the effort of dealing with nitwits had exhausted him.

  “Thanks for your call, Linda, and it looks like we’re out of time for tonight.” She offered Holgarth a plastic smile. “And thank you for being a fascinating guest. Good luck in your presidential bid.” Not. “And everyone join us again tomorrow for Donna till Dawn when we’ll have Tom Carson with us to talk about parallel universes.” Donedonedone! Thank. You. God.

  Donna stood and moved away from the table. Holgarth joined her. “Do you really think you have a shot at becoming president?”

  Holgarth glanced at his reflection in the bookstore window and once again shifted his hat. Jeez, did he have a slanted head, or what?

  “I don’t intend to run. Of course, if I did run, I’d win.” His smile was almost sincere. “Because I’d cheat.”

  “I don’t understand. What about what you told—”

  Holgarth’s sincere smile reverted to his usual superior smirk. “Did anyone ask about Eric, Brynn, Conall, Asima, or Lola tonight? In fact, did they ask any questions about the castle?”

  Realization widened Donna’s eyes. “You tried to distract them.”

  “Succeeded, Donna. I succeeded in distracting them.” He shifted his attention from his own reflection to her. “I thought Linda’s call was very thought provoking. And of course my answer was brilliant.” He speared her with a steely stare. “Solutions are usually available if we search outside the box.”

  “I guess so.” What the hell did that mean?

  “I’m put in mind of something Napoleon said to me. I think his exact words were, ‘The most dangerous moment comes with victory.’ ”

  “Uh-huh. And that is important for me to know, why?” Donna kind of liked the old Holgarth—mean and sarcastic. This new Holgarth was weirding her out.

  Holgarth shrugged. “Perhaps its meaning will become clearer in time.”

  Donna thought about that. “Do you know something I don’t?” A horrible possibility struck her. “You can’t see the future, can you?”

  “The future is always fluid. It can flow in many directions depending on our actions. It reminds me of a poem by Robert Frost.” He raised his gaze to the ceiling for inspiration.

  Oh, cripes. He wasn’t going to quote poetry now, was he?

  “In ‘The Road Not Taken,’ Frost says he took the road less traveled. For some of us, the less traveled road is the best. And once taken, we can never retrace our steps and choose another.” He turned and walked away.

  Whoa, road-of-life symbolism. Was that deep, or what? Sounded a little ominous, though. Yeah, she definitely liked the old pompous and irritating Holgarth better. She scrubbed at the sudden rash of goose bumps on her arms. This new one was a little scary.

  Donna glanced around. Brynn and Conall had looked in a few times during the show, but she hadn’t seen Eric at all. She tried to be glad about that. He’d be more steamed than he already was if he knew what she was plan
ning.

  Foregoing a meal in the restaurant, she went up to her room, changed into jeans and a T-shirt, grabbed her purse, and then left the castle. As she climbed into her car and drove back to the beach house, she prayed she was making the right decision. Everyone would be a lot safer if she turned around and went back to the castle. If she did, when she woke up tomorrow afternoon, Taurin would be gone. But she couldn’t. Her conscience was a nagging bitch, and she’d never have another peaceful moment if she didn’t do this.

  Parking in front of the destroyed beach house, she got out of her car and paused to draw in a deep breath of courage. At least she’d had the foresight to stop at an all-night convenience store and buy a flashlight.

  Tentatively she stepped into the high weeds and started walking. She shouldn’t have worn sandals. There were probably dozens of snakes eyeing her bare toes with evil in their hearts. And she’d bet there were thousands of big creepy spiders hiding in the weeds waiting to fling themselves onto her unprotected person. She slapped at her bare arms. She was making thousands of mosquitoes happy tonight.

  Mind to Donna. She was looking for a vampire. What were a few snakes, spiders, or mosquitoes on the creepy scale beside a vampire? Funny that she didn’t think that way about Eric.

  She was so busy thinking about snakes and spiders that she almost tripped over Taurin. That’s because he wasn’t where Brynn had left him. As she peered down at him, he tried to crawl another few inches.

  Forgetting for a moment who he was and what he’d tried to do, she simply knelt down beside him. “Taurin, I’m going to try to help you.”

  With a pained grunt he rolled over onto his back and looked up at her. “Why?” His question was a hoarse croak.

  Damndamndamn. He was still in vampire form. “Because I’m a stupid human with this pesky thing called a conscience. And things would be a whole lot easier if you changed back into human form.” He was burned badly, and she didn’t know how she’d get him into her car. Even if she drove the car into the field, he didn’t look like he’d have the strength to climb in. And she certainly didn’t have the strength to lift him.