Half Black Soul

by H. D. Gordon

  He seemed to mull this information over for a moment. Then he nodded once, lowered his head in a bow, and said, Pleasure.

  Uh, same, I returned, feeling stupid for some stupid reason.

  He turned back to Olivia. Ready? he asked.

  The old woman shook her head and smiled. Alexa, this is my nephew, Gabriel. She shot a look at him. Gabriel, this is Alexa. And, yes, we're ready. Would you mind getting Akira into her seatbelt while I say goodbye to our friends?

  He nodded once and held his hand out to Akira, but she ran over to me first. I scooped her up in my arms, ignoring the complaints of my battered body, and hugged her tight. My heart sunk down to my shoes when she whispered, I love you, Alexa.

  I ran my hand over her hair and sent a silent thank you up to whoever was listening for allowing me to get to her in time tonight. I still felt terrible because it had been my fault, but I wouldn't have been able to stand myself if something would have happened to her. The reality of this smacked me full-on in the gut as I hugged her goodbye. I love you too, I told her, because I very much did.

  Akira hugged Kayden next, and then followed Gabriel, who was still shamelessly studying my face, back to the car. Olivia hugged Kayden and me as well, and I noticed that she whispered something to him as she did so. He nodded in response, and she took her overnight bag from his hand and patted his cheek. When she got to Gabriel's car, she opened the passenger side door and braced an arm on top of it. Alexa, she called back. I inclined my head. Don't worry about the window, she said, and got into the car.

  I reached into my pocket and pulled two hundred dollar bills out of a plastic bag. I slid them under the front door of the house and turned to Kayden. Let's go, I said.

  He nodded. Let s.

  Alexa

  When we got into Tommy's Mercedes, I let Kayden drive again. I was exhausted and didn't feel like doing anything but taking a shower and going to sleep. Kayden didn't even bother to ask me where to go. He just searched for the nearest hotel on the GPS and started off. I put up no argument. I'd had enough excitement for one night. I immediately sought out the box of cigarettes in the center console. Upon opening it, I found that I only had three left. They wouldn't last me long. But I was tired enough that purchasing more would have to wait until morning. My eyelids were drooping.

  I had to lean over to Kayden's side of the car to retrieve the lighter I'd thrown onto the dashboard earlier. Being so close to him made my stomach tingle and my jaw clench, so I snatched the lighter quickly and sat back in my seat. I ran my tongue over my lips and placed the cigarette between them. When I cracked the window open a bit the whistle and whine of the wind relaxed me, but my body tensed up when I raised my hand and got a look at the lighter clutched between my fingers.

  I turned it over on its opposite side. When I'd found the lighter a few months ago it had been white with a red Kansas City Chiefs arrowhead logo on both sides of it. The arrowheads had been fading when I found it, but by now the symbols were completely rubbed off. Now the lighter was just white. Without thought or pause, I flipped it out of the open window.

  I cursed myself when I realized that I hadn't lit my cigarette. Shit.

  Kayden looked over at me. What? he asked.

  I began digging through the compartments in search of another flame-producing object. Threw the lighter out the window, I answered.

  Good idea.

  It was white, I snapped.

  Oooo.

  I laughed out loud at this, and a small smile found Kayden's lips as I did so. He replaced it with his usual serious expression a moment later. And, soon my smile fell from my lips as well. I resumed my frantic search for something with which to light my cigarette. A deep reach underneath my seat rewarded me with a book of matches. This was Tommy's car, and he was a smoker, so I'd figured there had to be something in here somewhere.

  But the search had taken me a full fifteen minutes before I found the matches, so we were already pulling into the parking lot of a small hotel when I finally got to pull the first wonderful, poisonous cloud of smoke into my lungs.

  Kayden parked the car in a semi-secluded area of the lot and turned to me. Did Tommy leave any of his clothes in here? he asked.

  I shrugged. There might be some in the trunk. I don't think I saw any in the backseat.

  He popped the truck and hopped out of the car. When he returned he held a gray sweatshirt in his hands. I recognized it as the one Tommy wore when we warmed up in our training classes at the Brocken school. Kayden pulled his ruined black t-shirt over his head and balled it up. He shoved his arms into the sleeves of Tommy's sweatshirt and paused before pulling it over his head.

  I couldn't help but stare at him. I didn't even care that he knew I was staring at him. His body was not something that could be ignored. I didn't understand how someone got to be so strong looking. The muscles in his stomach and chest were statue worthy. His skin was unblemished and smooth except for the various scars that were lucky enough to live there. I am not a weak person, in fact, I possess great strength myself, but while my body was defined and muscular, Kayden's body displayed his power in a way that mine never could. I was a small-framed girl naturally, with soft shoulders, small hands and healthy curves. Kayden was huge in comparison to me, and nothing about him was soft or feminine. So, I guess it just amazed me that somehow he still managed to be completely beautiful.

  At last he pulled the sweatshirt over his head, and I turned my face innocently toward the windshield. I didn't look over at him when he opened the door and stepped out of the car, but I could hear the invisible smile in his voice when he told me to Wait here .

  I finished my cigarette by the time Kayden got back. He pulled the car around to the north side of the hotel where I assumed our room was located. I breathed a silent sigh of relief when I saw that the room held two queen-sized beds. I'd already compromised my relationship with Jackson enough on this trip. I would have to tell him about the kiss between Kayden and me when I got back. Jackson was my best friend, and had been at a time when no one was interested in me. He'd saved my life more than once, and most of all, I truly cared for him. At the very least he deserved honesty from me.

  It occurred to me for the first time that Jackson may very well break up with me when he found out what I'd done. The thought of this made me cringe a little inside. What if he stopped talking to me altogether? That thought was unfathomable. A life without Jackson? No. Thank. You. Just thinking about it made me want another cigarette, so I pushed it out of my head. I only had two smokes left at the moment, and much more immediate issues to deal with than enlightening Jackson to my recent behavior.

  The room we were in was modest and clean, with the usual hotel furnishings. A few generic paintings by unknown artists hung on the off-white walls and the two chairs and bedding were tan-colored. A medium-sized flat-screen television hung on the wall in front of the two beds and the bathroom was located on the opposite side of the entrance to the room. I tossed my backpack on the nightstand and began to rummage through it for a fresh pair of clothes. I pulled out an oversized t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. Kayden grabbed the T.V. remote from the top of the television, plopped down in one of the chairs, and turned it on. I continued digging through my bag for my toothbrush, toothpaste and my hairbrush.

  Behind me, the sound of the television roared to life. Kayden flipped through channels and stopped on a station that was giving the local news. The weather forecast was calling for more rain, and I rolled my eyes without looking over at the screen. Of course it was going to keep raining. Why wouldn't it?

  The forecast concluded and the reporter launched into another story. My back went ramrod still and my hand clutched my toothbrush so tightly that the plastic gave way a little in my grip. My eyes found the television screen, and I couldn't pull them away.

  &.Pennsylvania State Police found the body of a man in the parking lot of the Silver Dollar diner located in the town of Somerset after receiving a frantic call from a worker w
ho was taking out the trash. The worker reported finding the body lying face-down near the edge of the parking lot. The victim was forty-three year old Stuart Billings. He was found with a knife wound in his throat and loss of blood was established as the cause of death. Police have found Billings DNA to be linked to several unsolved murders of young girls in the nearby areas. As of right now the police have no suspects for the homicide of Billings &.

  My heart had stopped dead in my chest and my body felt frozen in place. Stuart Billings. He had a name. Of course he did. Everyone has a name. I kept replaying the information, not truly able to comprehend. I seemed to be instantly broken-minded, and the meanings of the words were as lost to me as a foreign language. But they ran over and over nonetheless; Stuart Billings no suspects Stuart Billings loss of blood cause of death Stuart Billings Victim

  My monster's voice cut in, flat cold and uncaring: You heard what they said. He was linked to several murders of young girls. He would have killed us. He deserved it.

  I didn't have the mind to argue with its stupid opinion. My eyes fell to the tan carpet at my feet. I could tell that Kayden was watching me, but I couldn't find it in me to look over at him. I walked stiffly over to the bathroom and opened the door. I shut it behind me and stripped out of my clothes, leaving them in a bloody wet heap on the floor. I stepped into the shower stall without looking in the mirror over the sink. Standing under the faucet, I turned the knob, and ice cold water rained down over me. I didn't shiver. Turning the knob all the way over to the red followed the freezing water with burning hot. I left it there. I could stand it, and it seemed somehow appropriate.

  Around my feet the black blood of the Lamias and my own red blood ran down the drain. I kept waiting for the water to turn clear again, but all of twenty minutes went by before the last swirls of black and red disappeared through the holes of the grate. The hot water felt more like a hot poker on some spots on my body. The deep gash on my thigh was the worst, but I'd sustained several other cuts and scrapes as well, and each one of them burned like hell. Eventually, I sat down in the stall and tucked my knees against my chest. I rested my head against the red skin on my knees and let my hair fall over my face. In my head I placed one thought on a loop and repeated it over and over: good needs its warriors too, good needs its warriors too, good needs its warriors too & Intervening on its own accord was one other, but it was more a name and a word, rather than a thought: Stuart Billings. Victim.

  I sat there like that for a long time, well over an hour, with my skin turning bright red all over from the hot water and pruning up like a raisin. My monster kept silent, and for this I was grateful. My own thoughts were disturbing enough. I'd started this day on a mission to save the life of someone I love, and somehow, I'd ended up a murderer. Not a seventeen-year-old girl with the inclinations of akiller, but a full-fledged murderer. The word brought a horrible, irony taste to my mouth. But not a single tear fell from my eyes.

  When I heard the door to the bathroom click open I flinched, but stayed in my current position. Kayden probably thought I'd died or something. I'd been in here for way too long. I'm fine, I said quietly, and the sound of my own voice seemed somehow weak and wrong.

  I expected Kayden to leave me then. I certainly wanted him too. Somehow, being curled up into a ball on the floor of a hotel shower stall with my body bruised and battered and my hair hanging in chucks over my face didn't seem like the ideal way for Kayden to see me. It wasn't a state I wanted anyone to see me in. Ever.

  So when the curtain of the shower cracked open a few inches, and Kayden's hand reached in and turned off the faucet, my body began to shake and shiver uncontrollably. It wasn't so much the fact that I was so completely naked with Kayden in the room that bothered me. It was the fact that someone was in the room with me and I was so completely Broken. Not even Nelly had ever seen me like this. I had never been like this.

  He didn't look in at me at all, for which I was quite grateful. In fact, all I could see of him was his hand, which retreated from my side of the curtain after shutting off the shower faucet and returned holding a white towel. For a few moments I ignored it, and I may have continued ignoring it if the flat voice of my unwelcome friend hadn't spoken up in my head.

  Get the hell up, girl. Snap out of it.

  My silent response was a snarled, Shut the fuck up.

  We'll not be acting like this. You're curled up on the floor of a hotel bathroom, for God's sake. I'll shut the fuck up as soon as you get the fuck up.

  I reached out and snatched the towel out of Kayden's hand. A few seconds later the door to the bathroom opened and closed again. I poked my head out to make sure that he had left and dried off with the towel. My skin was raw and red and my muscles and joints ached so badly that I got lightheaded and had to brace myself with my arm against the wall to keep steady. A low growl of pain escaped my throat, and I cursed myself for sitting in the scalding water for that long. I hated feeling weak. In my head, my monster gave a small chuckle. I rolled my eyes and stepped out of the shower stall, wrapping the towel around me. I was relieved when I saw that the mirror over the sink was completely fogged up. I looked over at the door, clutching the sink now for support. I didn't want to go out there and let Kayden see how weak I was. He'd seen enough.

  Bite down on the pain, then. It's the second thing a Warrior does best.

  Annoying, but probably true. I took a deep breath and rolled my neck around a few times. It cracked on both sides and my head cleared a little. I rolled my shoulders and flexed my back. Working my way down to my ankles, I stretched and flexed, and felt the strength slowly returning to my muscles. My head was still light, but I could stand on my own two feet. The pain of the cuts and bruising was very much present, and my rib was aching like a sonofabitch, but when I clenched my jaw tightly the nausea induced by the hurt became bearable. Another deep breath, and I opened the door.

  Kayden stood right outside of it, blocking my exit from the bathroom, and I had to stop short so as not to run face first into his wide chest. I waited for him to move, feeling very much a coward because I didn't want to meet his eyes. But, Kayden didn't move. And I heard my monster mumble yellowbelly when I considered trying to just shove past him rather than looking up at his face. I took one more deep breath, and looked up.

  I can't describe the look in his eyes. I'm pretty sure that the adjectives to do so do not exist. But, I can describe what I felt when my slowly ascending gaze finally settled on his golden one, and I only need one word to do it with; safe.

  For the first time since I'd begun my strange relationship with Kayden, my Libra, I understood what it was all about. He may never love me romantically, but what he did feel for me was infinitely deeper than that. More essential. I was built for wear and tear; strong and hard and powerful, but those positives carried with them a very negative side-effect, and Kayden was built to help me control that. By blood and being, we were designed to help, protect, understand, and keep each other. I would be a fool to deny myself a relationship like that, whether or not it pained me to be near him without touching him, and whether or not it meant that I would never be able to call him mine in an intimate way. His soul already belonged to me, and mine to him. We needed each other. I needed him.

  So, instead of shoving him out of the way, I took a tiny step forward. I placed both of my slightly trembling palms flat against his chest and rested my head in between them. My ear must have been positioned right over his heart, because the steady thud thud was so clearly audible to me. I listened to the rhythm of its beats, and could feel my own heart rate adjust to mimic his. His strong arms wrapped around me and held me tight, sending warm chills up my back. His prickly cheek rested atop my head. My eyes closed and trouble slowly released its hold on my mind. My Libra's presence was forcing it all away.

  We stood like that for a while, and my body became as relaxed as jelly in his embrace. I didn't open my eyes or make any other movements at all. I just listened to the sound of his breathing, st
ole the warmth from his arms, and accepted the mending of my mind. Fear of a broken heart was nothing compared to the fear I'd felt all day after nearly losing myself over the edge of insanity. A possible broken heart was worth settled soul.

  Kayden scooped me up and carried me over to the bed. He set me down so that I was seated upright and retrieved the oversized t-shirt I'd pulled out earlier and must have dropped on the floor in my hasty retreat to the bathroom. I clutched the towel to my chest as he sat down next to me, dipping the mattress with his weight. Kayden pulled the shirt over my head and it fell loosely down to my waist. Finally concealed, I released my hold on the towel and stuck my arms through the sleeves. Kayden tossed me my backpack and sweatpants and turned his head while I pulled on some underwear and the warm pants, but stayed seated next to me on the bed.

  When he grabbed my hairbrush from the nightstand I expected him to hand it to me. Instead, he lifted me up as though I weighted nothing at all, and repositioned my body so that my back was facing him. I made no protest or comment. He started at the tips of my hair, gently working his way up with the brush. My hair is fine and thick and long, so I'd bet my Gladius that it had some nasty tangles at the moment. But Kayden worked patiently, and the knots came out free of pain. Soon my hair was smooth and presentable again.

  My eyelids had fallen well past half-mast. I'm not someone who likes to be touched by others. But, this was Kayden, and that has never applied to him. Also, no woman on earth is immune to the incredible feeling of gentle fingers running through her hair, and I had to swallow hard a few times to keep myself from purring like a pleased kitten.

  I was very close to slipping into sleep when I felt the brush leave my hair. I almost groaned at the loss of his touch. But, then his fingers brushed my shoulder, and chills ran over my skin as if an icy wind had just cut through the room. Except, I wasn't in the least bit cold at the moment. The t-shirt I had on was large, and my body is small by anyone's standards, so the collar was loose and wide around my neck. Kayden's rough fingers pulled the collar of it to the side so that my right shoulder was revealed. I swallowed hard once more.