Always Angel (The List #4)

by N. K. Love

  “I can’t handle this, Jax… I’m frightened. I need you.”

  I let the words breathe out on a tiny, shaken whisper.

  “Shhh, Beth. I’m right here with you.” He tries to soothe me with his delicate, warm tone. “You’ve gotta stay with me, just a few more minutes. We’re only a couple of miles away.”

  That’s too good to be true. Does he know it’s impossible to reach me in time? Is he trying to make the inevitable tragedy not quite so tragic? Something stupidly sinister snaps inside of me.

  “No, you’re not.” I hiss out in a rush of misplaced anger and twisted desperation. “You’re doing to me what you did to Chloe; you’re lying to me. You’re feeding me false hope. They are gonna reach me bef—”

  “Beth, calm the fuck down before you blow your cover… I would never lie to you. I’m coming for you, I promise.”

  So he is closer than I thought—but that golden pocket of relief is short lived when I hear footsteps on the gravel in the yard.

  “They’re in.”

  “It’s okay. You’re well-hidden. Now, stop talking. I mean it.”

  Yes, I am well-hidden. But, it’s petrifying knowing they’re just meters away and hunting for me. Jax’s words repeat over and over in my head; ‘I’m coming for you, I promise.’ Either that, or he could be repeating them in my ear himself, I feel delirious at this point. The only positive thing about being scared out of my wits is that, other than the rise and fall of my chest, I’m staying perfectly still.

  The sound of them walking outside gets louder, as does the sound of my heartbeat pounding my eardrums. I’m breathing with my mouth in rapid, short breaths. I hear Jax saying something to Jack, but I can’t make out what.

  “Beth, sweetheart, you need to concentrate.” He must be holding the phone for Jack to speak to me. I can hear the difference in his voice, like he’s managed to put on his doctor’s white jacket. It’s calmer than before. “I know you’re panicking, but we need you to control your breathing. You don’t want to trigger a panic attack or pass out.”

  Actually, the latter seems like a viable option. Right now, I’m standing at the bottom of a mountain, watching an avalanche rushing towards me at a hundred miles an hour. There’s no point running. All I can do is wait for fate to run its course, whilst praying that my superhero will fly by and save me!

  “Jack’s right. You need to put the phone on your lap… Focus on my voice a minute, Angel… I love you and I will never let anything happen to you… Put the phone on your lap. I’ll still be here. Gather your thoughts.”

  I open my mouth to whisper ‘I love you’ back, but close it again, choosing to take the intended strength from his words instead.

  Concentrate Beth.

  When I hear the stranger’s voices again, I try to gauge their whereabouts. I’m not sure whether it’s even English. It’s muffled, but I can tell it’s heated. Thanks to Jax, it hasn’t turned out to be the easy ambush they must’ve meticulously planned.

  The footsteps are too frequent and out of sync to be from one person, so they seem to be walking up and down the yard together as they talk. Probably deciding who is going to look where. I start to breathe a little easier, letting my fingertips smooth over the gun, where I’m clinging to it tightly with both hands.

  I hear the sound of the gravel fading away. Maybe they’re heading down by the pool to check first. That’s where I would’ve headed if Jax had let me run. That’ll take a while to search.

  A minute later and one set of footsteps treads back towards the outbuildings. They must’ve split up to look more effectively.

  Next, the door to the gym is rattled and then a loud thud startles me. Fuck. I can’t believe this is happening. On the second thud, I realise he’s trying to kick the door in. After two more attempts, he must give up and I close my eyes, allowing a shimmer of hope to calm me a little, knowing that he can’t get to me.

  The sudden sound of the gym window shattering, snaps my thoughts back up to ground level. An all-important, terrifying fact creeps into my head. Gasping aloud, I quickly bite my lips shut, holding my breath. I’ve fucked up, bad.

  I didn’t hear the door click shut. If it didn’t shut all the way, the security system won’t have reactivated. Jax said, ‘shut the door behind you. Make sure it clicks.’ I didn’t do that. Why didn’t I fucking do that? I’m a sitting duck!

  The stuffy, dusty air is long since forgotten when blood rushes cold through my veins with fear. He’s coming in here next. If the door’s open, he’ll surely see where I’ve disturbed the dust on the floor.

  I count four footsteps before he is at the door. Please be shut. Please be locked. Please. Please. Fucking, please. My silent prayers fall on deaf ears, as the scariest sound of all comes next…. The door creaks open and then slams against the inner wall.

  “Ha ha! I like cat and mouse!”

  His deep voice makes my skin crawl, sending dark vibrations down to the bone. Don’t move Beth, don’t move. I’m breaking onto a cold sweat. I want to readjust the gun, but don’t want to risk dropping it.

  This is it. I either hold it together now or risk losing everything forever.

  The man walks around cautiously above me. His steps are slow. He is being intentionally loud though. Perhaps he is trying to scare me enough to flush me out of hiding. Well, I’m definitely scared. My thighs are trembling uncontrollably now. I look up and because it’s so dark down here, I can make out flashes of a torchlight between the paper thin slits in the floorboards.

  Shit. My phone screen. If a text or notification or something comes through, the screen will light up. I carefully lower both hands between my knees, flip the phone to face down in my lap and return to position, angling up towards the opening.

  I hear the scrape of something large moving, possibly the tool caddy I saw. I need to stay in control. Jack’s right, I don’t want to bring on a panic attack or pass out and with the way my body’s reacting, my control is slipping.

  Do not hesitate to squeeze that trigger.

  Hearing Jax’s voice in my head and feeling at the height of danger, I resort to the only thing that can see me through this. I close my eyes and let images of Jax flash in and out of my mind’s eye; Jax laughing, smiling, sulking, sleeping.

  It works. My breathing starts to fall steady, silently blowing out each exhale, slowly between my lips. Leaving me to settle on the most tranquil vision; lying in bed, face to face, watching Jax sleeping, studying the outlines of his handsome face.

  My body’s not shaking anymore. I am motionless.

  After clattering around some more, the floorboards eerily squeak as he rounds the quad bike, directly above me. This triggers that feeling of dread to return at full pelt. What if I never see my loved ones again? They’ll get a call to tell them I’ve been kidnapped or…worse. They’ll be heartbroken. What if I never see Jax again? The man I love. The man that has loved me back and made me feel happier than I ever believed possible.

  He’ll blame himself, just like he did with Chloe’s death. He’d let it haunt him for eternity. He’d revert back to his old ways, putting himself in danger in a bid to unnecessarily iron out creases on the scale of justice. He would. I just know it.

  I’m so tempted to pick up my phone and hold it to my ear—even if it’s just to hear him breathing.

  Just like a lone swan, floating majestically on a lake; on the outside I’m cautious, silent and still. But, below the surface, I’m kicking like crazy just to stay afloat. My heads a muddle of panic and chaos, screaming out for Jax.

  The close proximity of the intruder, has my heart hammering so hard, it feels like it’s doubled in size. I squeeze my eyes shut. Please go. You haven’t found me. Please move on to somewhere else.

  His movements stop abruptly. Fuckity fuck fuck. Shit. I surely didn’t say that out loud, did I? No, of course I didn’t! His feet start shuffling above me. When it continues, I realise he must be sweeping back the dust with his feet, revealing my hiding place. Will
he see the outline of the trapdoor with his torch?

  An almighty thud rains down just above the latch, which rattles a little. I turn my face into my hoody and bite down hard on a chunk of material. What did he hit it with? That latch won’t hold for many more forceful blasts like that one. This is it. Don’t hesitate. I can do this. This scary motherfucker—

  “Jack, get to her.”

  Jax? It can’t be… Oh my God. I’m stunned. Did they knock out that man?

  “Jax! Jax!” I shout with a croaky voice, whilst scrambling to my knees. I need to get to him.

  “No. She’s safe, Jax. I’m coming with you.”

  I hear lots of footsteps walking around above. They’re here. They’re really here. My insides do clumsy cartwheels, sending butterflies flying into a frenzied flurry of relief.

  “Jax!” I shout again, clearer this time.

  “No you’re fucking not! Now move him out the way and get to her… Gimme that.” Some footsteps trail off towards the door. “Look after her for me.”

  Just like that, he is gone again. Those pining butterflies have all just been kicked to the ground. I listen out but don’t hear the tread of crunching gravel because he knows exactly how to manoeuvre around the yard without making a sound.

  I hear Jack moving around though. So, I put the gun on the floor behind me and ease myself up onto my feet.

  “Jack?”

  “I’m here, sweetheart. Unlock the door for me.”

  A moment of doubt flickers in my mind. My jelly legs and numb backside start to come back to life. I press a button on my phone and squint away as the screen lights up. Shining it up towards the latch, I slide it across and hear that same shuffling noise from above.

  Pushing the door ajar an inch or two, I immediately drop it when I’m faced with the haunting look of a dead man’s face. His torch was on the floor nearby, pointing straight in his direction, lying slumped at Jack’s feet.

  Feeling impossibly more shaken than before, I carelessly stagger back against the wall. Closing my eyes, I quickly open them again when that image repeats itself like a horror movie. I didn’t see any blood, but his bulbous dark eyes were wide open, looking ghostlike already, when he only left this world a minute ago. At the hands of who? Jack? Jax? My Jax—who’s never killed before.

  “Beth, I’m going to open the hatch now. Okay?” Jesus, this isn’t over. I don’t answer. I’m freaking out again. I want Jax. I crouch back down onto my knees and spread my palms over the floor, searching around until I find the gun again. “Beth?”

  “Um. Yes. Jack, yes, I’m okay.”

  The sound of my voice, inside this enclosed space, still sounds strange. When the hatch starts to open, it lets in some cooler air along with the light from the torch, which Jack is now holding. Moving gingerly, he eases himself into the hole and closes the door behind him. He lowers the torch to the floor, leaving it on, then holds out his hand, gesturing for the gun. I hand it over without question.

  “Beth, look at me.” My head stays bowed. I’m trying to focus on the amount of time that Jax has been gone. How is he going to protect himself when he doesn’t know where the second man is? “Beth! Look at me!”

  Jack’s stern voice brings me back into my tiny prison, whilst Jax is out there in the darkness, with a madman on the loose. My eyes fly up to meet Jack’s shadowed face, laden with concern.

  “Should we call the police? Does Jax have a weapon? That man might have a gun. You should go to him, Jack. Take him that gun.” My rambling whispers are smothered into Jack’s chest as he falls to his knees and wraps me in his arms, weakening my resolve. “He needs you, Jack… He needs you.”

  “No, Beth… He needs you.” Those words become the final nudge to send me over the edge. I allow my tears to freefall, switching my brain off and succumbing to my exhausted emotions. Jack rocks me gently from side to side, rubbing my back, holding my head against his chest. “Jax knows what he is doing… This is his place remember and he knows every inch of it… He took that man’s gun—so he is armed and far more dangerous than these fuckers. Trust me.”

  I let his words reassure me and my tears gradually subside—but I won’t breathe easy until Jax is here.

  “Who killed…? How did…?”

  “Shhh. Don’t worry about that. Come on.”

  He guides me down until we’re both sitting on the floor with our backs against the wall, facing the hatch again. Cloaking his arm around me, holding me against his right side, he raises his left knee, where he then rests the hand that’s holding the gun.

  Within a minute of this eerie silence, my imagination starts uncontrollably running rife with gruesome visions. Thinking of all the things that could happen right now—up there… I don’t try to prevent the images this time—as though I’m preparing myself for the possible eventualities.

  “I couldn’t live without him, Jack. He is my soulmate.”

  Jack kisses the top of my head.

  “I know, sweetheart.”

  “It’s been too long, hasn’t it?” I mutter quietly into his shoulder. “Something’s wrong.”

  “Give him ti—”

  A gunshot rings out from the distance.

  “Jack!” And then another. “What do we do?”

  “We wait.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Jax

  After thoroughly searching the body and coming up empty, I turn and sprint as fast as I can, back towards the yard.

  Beth.

  I should be on a plane now and Beth should be tucked up safely in her apartment. How did it come to this? They did know my address and they knew about Beth. They fucking knew and I risked her life because I must’ve missed something. I must’ve.

  I swear to God, the emotions that rushed through me, when I realised she’d been set up… I’ve never felt such anguish. With Chloe, I felt helpless, but with Beth, fuck, that was soul destroying.

  My immediate thoughts were; kidnap or kill. But I had my answer the second the word ‘motorbike’ fell from her lips. Right then, I knew we were up against the latter.

  Running across the graveled yard, I stop in the doorway to compose myself. Catching my breath a little, I flick the switch to the turn on the fluorescent strip lighting. I stride over to the hatch desperate to hold her. I have an overwhelming need to cradle her in my arms and never let her go. She is my absolute everything.

  My eyes wander to the left. I don’t want them to open the hatch until I’ve covered up this body.

  A body. Well, two bodies, actually. Lying around my property—my refuge—my home. I’ve never killed until now. But I feel nothing. These men came here to kill Beth tonight and that fact is blocking any feelings of remorse. The look in his eyes is disturbing though. It takes me right back to that night, looking down at Chloe.

  First I thoroughly search him, expecting nothing. But in his back pocket, there’s a phone and a card. I see a skull symbol so I know it’s a calling card. No time to spare now, I shove them in my pocket. Quickly yanking off the quad bike cover, I throw it over the body.

  “It’s me.”

  The door rises open straight away. Jack is standing up. We exchange a swift nod and he turns to help Beth. Scooping her up in his arms, he lifts her up to me. She’s covered in dust, except for the clean patches on her cheeks. Her puffy eyes squint up at me in disbelief, as though she is still trying to convince herself that I’m really here.

  “Jax. You’re okay.” I hook my arms behind her knees and neck, then gently bring her out of the hole and tightly into my chest. “Jax.”

  Beth clings onto me with shaky hands, burying her face. I feel her body trembling against me. Jack grabs her handbag and climbs out behind her.

  “Are you okay?”

  She nods and then she looks back up at me. Her bottom lip quivers, betraying her answer. Biting her lips together, she shakes her head and I storm out, away from the room that’s already scarred her memory for life.

  We need to get out of here.
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br />   Heading across the yard and into the field, I cradle her closely. Jack falls back, giving us some space. Beth’s gripping on tightly, moulding herself to me, as though I’ll disappear if she lets go.

  Remaining vigilant, I take the time to breathe in her presence. This wonderful woman is intrinsic to my life. I’d die for her and now I know that I’d kill for her. I did—twice. I’d do it over and over again if I had to, to keep her safe.