Devastation: A Beauty and the Beast Novel

by MJ Haag

  The wide neckline set the sleeves from the woman’s shoulders, and her side swept hair bared her neck, which she held regally erect. She turned her head, and I caught sight of her profile. Blye.

  Her sewing must be lucrative, indeed, to afford such a dress. When would she ever wear it again, though? I watched her glide into the ballroom and look around. Her gaze slid right over me and settled on someone not yet in the ballroom. I turned to look back in the hall and found Lord Ruhall walking slowly as he listened to what the man beside him said. I wanted to shake my head at my sister for her wasted efforts.

  “Would you care to dance?” someone said as he gently tapped my shoulder. I turned to find Bolen, one of the Kinlyn boys, bowing to me.

  “I would be delighted, sir,” I said, returning his humor and pushing Blye from my mind.

  Bolen led me to the floor, and we joined the others already there in a simple dance. He kept his hand politely at my waist while he held my other hand.

  “How have you been?” I asked. “I heard you were able to fish.”

  “I am well, thank you. We’ve been fishing more now that the crops are in. Parlen finally got his wild pig with Da’s help.” He regaled me with their story and had me laughing. “He wanted to dance with you so he could tell you himself, but Ma said...” A blush painted his cheeks.

  His mother hadn’t wanted Parlen to dance with me. But why? I could think of only one reason. The baker. Yet why then let another son dance with me?

  “Did your mother think me unsuitable to dance with?”

  “Not at all,” he rushed to assure me. “She said it would be improper to dance with a woman so much taller than him.”

  I puzzled for a moment then laughed aloud as I realized young Parlen would have been level with my breasts.

  “Well, there are many girls here who are very close to his height. I hope he asks some of them.”

  The dance ended, and before I could leave the floor, I had another offer to dance. I vaguely recalled seeing the boy while I’d attended school but could not recall his first name. His family lived on a patch of land to the south, like the Kinlyns.

  Another song saw a new partner waiting for me; and as I danced, Blye’s words about how unsuitable I would be rang in my ears. How could I be so unsuitable and dance with so many while my perfectly suitable sister stood on the side without a single offer to dance? Blye circled the ballroom, chatting to those she knew and casting long looks at Lord Ruhall.

  When the song ended, I found myself facing Henick. He took up my hand and gently held my waist as I rested my palm on his shoulder. A new song began, and he led our moves.

  “Did you know there is a line to dance with you?”

  “Surely not,” I said, looking around. I caught Alec’s thunderous frown before Henick’s laugh returned my attention.

  “It’s true. Not an obvious line, but it’s there all the same. Bolen was smart to grab you first.”

  “Your brother was a fine dancer. As are you. I hope the other women here find the same attention as I’ve received.”

  He smiled.

  “A few might. But none are as pretty.”

  I blushed and glanced away. My gaze collided with Alec’s again. He tracked my dance with Henick, clearly unhappy. When he saw me looking at him, he jerked his head to the side, a motion to show me he wanted me to leave the floor. I returned my gaze to Henick, determined to ignore Alec and his threats.

  “Perhaps you’ll allow me to introduce you to a friend who might be one of those few?” I asked.

  “I would be honored.”

  On the next turn of the room, Alec wasn’t where he had been. Before I could worry, the dance ended; and I asked Henick to walk me to the drink table rather than let another partner sweep me into the next set.

  Drink in hand, I turned back to observe the room and caught sight of Alec weaving his way through waiting dancers. Unbeknownst to him, Blye moved toward him from his right, their paths set to intersect. She stepped in front of him just as the music started. He frowned at her then, glancing about, held out a hand.

  Ila approached Henick and me and noted the direction of my gaze.

  “Your sister is bold,” she said.

  I nodded slightly then focused on my friends.

  “Henick, this is my friend, Ila.”

  Henick smiled and bowed over her hand. Within moments, they were fully engaged in conversation. It gave me time to observe Lord Ruhall and Blye.

  He swirled her around the room at an aggressive pace. His gaze wasn’t on her but was searching the dancers around them. She didn’t seem to notice his distraction for she tilted her head back, laughed, and moved closer to him. Everyone turned to watch them. Her skirts flared out prettily, and I had never disliked my sister so much as in that moment. She only wanted him for his wealth and would ruin all the hard work Alec, Father, and I, along with the rest of the old staff, had put into this affair and the estate.

  I wished he would announce his intent to wed. Blye certainly wasn’t an option for him.

  As soon as the song ended, I excused myself and approached the pair, planning to pull Blye aside to speak to her.

  “Lord Ruhall, might I have a moment with—”

  “Of course. We can speak as we dance,” he said, releasing Blye abruptly and pulling me into his arms. He twirled me onto the floor before I could protest. We moved together as we had to the sweet bird song that day long ago. I couldn’t deny I felt a thrill being in his arms. I tilted my head back to study him. His deep blue gaze remained locked on me, and I struggled to keep my wits about me.

  “I meant to speak with my sister.”

  “Whatever for,” he said, pulling me closer.

  His body brushed against mine as we moved. I tried to gain distance but his hard hold wouldn’t yield. So, I gripped his shoulder, fighting to remain upright during the dizzying pace he set.

  He leaned in and breathed in near my neck, sending a shiver racing through me.

  “That scent...”

  “My hair,” I said. I hadn’t oiled my hair since the enchantment had broken.

  Knowing it was dangerous, I allowed myself to relax. Just for a few moments, I wanted to pretend he truly loved and cherished me above all else. That he and I were together and happy like we’d been before the baker.

  “I need you,” he whispered. “More than the air I breathe. More than my freedom.”

  My heart thumped painfully at his words, which were so close to what I’d just been thinking. I pulled back again, searching his gaze for answers I so desperately needed.

  “Don’t forget that in the next few moments,” he said with a wild look.

  We stopped twirling and before my world righted itself, I was alone in the center of the room.

  “Your attention, please,” Alec called from near the drink table. “Everyone take up your drink for I would like to toast this feast.”

  While I wondered how he’d crossed the room so quickly, those on the floor left to obtain drinks; and those crowding the edges of the room, moved closer, filling in the empty dance floor around me.

  “Raise your cups,” Alec said, raising his own.

  My pulse leapt. Would he announce his intention to wed now? My stomach gave a sickening twist.

  Alec’s gaze met mine, and my heart shattered all over again.

  “To a merry harvest feast,” he said loudly and clearly. “The first the North has seen in too many years. And I owe the success to Miss Hovtel, the beautiful, kind, and intelligent woman who has just consented to marry me.”

  My mouth dropped open as cheers erupted throughout the room. Alec’s serious and slightly angry gaze held mine as he drank deeply. It was almost as if he were daring me to refute his claim. Suddenly, his words made his plan clear. He had just said that he needed me more than his freedom. He had warned me he would ruin the feast if I acted out against him in any way. If I rejected him here, now, he would do as he’d promised. He would ruin the feast and force Rose’s ha
nd.

  My first reaction was anger. He’d planned to snare me all along. Then, I began to wonder what he had to gain by doing that. Me. Just me. Could he truly care for me so much? Hope spread like wildfire, worrying me. I needed a moment to think.

  Well-wishers pressed close, blocking Alec from my sight. I nodded, smiled, and thanked those who congratulated me. The music struck up once more, and most of those around me moved away to clear the floor.

  Purposefully, I made my way to the open garden doors. The sun had begun its descent, casting long shadows in the garden. Overgrown as it had been, there wasn’t much to see as my gaze swept the area. A movement to my right caught my eye but before I could focus, someone stepped out of the ballroom behind me.

  I turned and saw Alec by the door. Behind him, dancers moved in time with the music, a bustle of motion compared to his still watchfulness. We eyed each other for several long moments.

  “Why?” I said. “You lied to everyone and, through your threats, forced my silence. What kind of Lord does that make you?”

  “A desperate one, I should think.”

  “Desperate?”

  He let out a frustrated sigh.

  “I’ve asked you to be my wife countless times to which you always answer no.”

  “With reason,” I said in exasperation.

  “Reasons that can be overcome. You care for me. You admitted it. Yet, you stubbornly refuse to believe I care for you. You have fears about being a wife but won’t trust that I can be patient, though I’ve spent the last fifty years practicing patience.”

  “I would hardly call that patience.”

  He ran his hand through his hair. I watched him struggle to control his temper.

  “Your unwillingness to see reason forced this lie. Have no doubt I will carry through with my threat. Whether as the man you loathe or the beast you once loved, I will have you.”

  Again, pretty words. Could I trust them?

  He turned and strode once more into the ballroom, and suddenly, Aryana’s words rang in my mind. “Lies are necessary when truth fails.” What truth had failed? My heart wanted to swell at the answer I found there. His love for me, because of my shattered trust in him and in men.

  I turned away from the door and watched the sky change from blue to azure. High above, the first star sparkled in the darkening sky.

  “Do you think this will change anything?”

  I whirled at the sound of Tennen’s voice. He stood just outside the door, partially hidden by the growing shadows. Surely, he wouldn’t be so foolish as to try something with so many nearby to come to my aid.

  “Yes, I do,” I said, answering his question. “It will make you hate me more. A hate I do not deserve.”

  He snorted in disbelief and walked back into the ballroom.

  Inside, the lit pillars and fire gave the large room a soft light. Near the food tables opposite the door, Alec watched me. His gaze followed Tennen briefly before returning to me. His observation made me feel safe, and I considered our engagement once more. If I were honest, it relieved me that he’d taken the decision from me. My heart hadn’t forgotten his affection, though I’d desperately wanted it to. Could I dare allow myself to love him once more?

  “You will make a fine Lady,” Otta said softly, “if you can stop seeing innocence in everyone.” The unexpected sound from behind startled me, as did the familiar words. I spun to face her.

  Her small face began to transform, and I gasped as I recognized Aryana. I grabbed her wrist and quickly pulled her into the shadows.

  “Speak your mind then leave,” I said once I knew we were out of Alec’s sight.

  “You invited me.”

  “As yourself. I tire of your games. When will you leave the north and Lord Ruhall in peace?”

  “When he is wed and settled. I’m not so certain you will be his wife, as he so clearly desires.”

  “And I’m not so certain you will leave us in peace when we are finally wed.”

  “Despite the trap he’s laid for you, I could help you leave if that is what you wish.”

  I stared at her for a moment.

  “I think that is what you wish. As Otta, you have watched for any excuse to return the curse. Speak true now. Why do you hate him so?” Then a thought occurred to me. “Did he hurt you like he did Egrit?” Compassion warred with distaste. “If he did, I must remind you that you allowed, no, encouraged his abuse of you. You forced it by purposely setting his freedom on a task he would misinterpret. Yet, I would understand if you did harbor hatred.”

  “No, he never hurt me. Egrit needed to learn a lesson as much as he did,” she said with a sigh and a shake of her head. “Such a high price to pay.”

  “Was that why you allowed Tennen to take me? Was I to learn a lesson? If so, I believe I failed.”

  Her expression softened.

  “Rape is never a tool to teach.”

  “But Egrit...”

  “She was willing through it all, Benella. I thought she told you as much. She could have solidified at any time. She wanted him to use her, to find favor in her. She wanted to please him over her own self-preservation. That was the lesson she needed to learn. To put herself, her safety, before his desires. To value herself, she needed to learn to say no.”

  Aryana glanced over my shoulder, and her form began to recede into Otta once more.

  “I will be watching,” she said before ducking into the bushes.

  “Miss Hovtel, Lord Ruhall requests that you come back into the light. He is concerned,” Tam said from the doorway.

  “I’ll come inside,” I said, moving toward him. “Will you dance with me?”

  “Me?” He looked surprised. “I shouldn’t think it suitable.”

  “I’m still the same. And, this is the harvest feast. If you dance with me, it will let the others know it’s all right to do so as well.”

  “I would be honored,” he said with a bow.

  For the next hour, I twirled about the dance floor with various partners, carefully avoiding Bryn and Blye, who both seemed intent on speaking to me. When my feet grew tired, I begged my partner for a small break. Ila found me on the side of the room and offered me a glass of cider.

  “I saw you dancing with Henick,” I said. The Kinlyn boys were availing themselves to any willing partner and were truly making the feast a merry event.

  “He’s kind.”

  “And handsome, too,” I said with a small, knowing smile. “I believe he and his brother are looking for wives.”

  She looked off in his direction.

  “Do you think he will care?”

  I knew she meant about her past.

  “As you said, he is kind. I don’t think he will mind at all.”

  She turned to study me then changed the subject.

  “Lady Ruhall,” she said. “That will be a change.”

  “Yes. Quite a change.”

  “You don’t sound certain.”

  “I’m certain there will be a change. I’m not certain if it will be a positive one.”

  She leaned closer with a concerned frown.

  “You’ve no wish to marry him?” she asked in a hushed tone.

  I chose my words with care.

  “The suddenness of the announcement and the reactions of a few have me doubting my wishes.”

  She straightened with a sigh and patted my arm.

  “Follow your heart. It will lead you true.”

  I thought of Bryn and her infatuation with Tennen.

  “Sometimes, I think the heart isn’t a good leader,” I said softly.

  Before my cider had time to warm, Alec found me from across the room. His serious gaze held mine as he wove through people to reach my side. My heart gave an erratic beat.

  “Will you dance with me?” he asked.

  The reality of the announcement gripped me. He was mine. Should he be? Was this what I wanted? I thought so because the idea of him marrying someone else truly upset me. Yet, I still doubted his affecti
on for me. I believed he cared for me, but did he care for me more than he did the estate?

  He held out his hand, waiting for my answer.

  “Yes. I’ll dance with you.”

  He took the cup from my hand and set it on the table. My pulse leapt as he captured my fingers and led me to the floor.

  He placed a sure hand at my waist, and we joined with the swirling dancers. He held me close, and I struggled to remain indifferent to his touch, my heart and my mind conflicted. What would a life with Alec, Lord Ruhall, mean for me? Bryn and Blye thought it meant luxury, but I knew better. There was little money; but even if it was plentiful, I wouldn’t be interested in it. I wanted a marriage of love and consideration. Would I find that?

  His gaze never left me, and the longer we danced, the more he frowned.

  “What are you looking for when you study me so intently?” I said to distract myself.

  “A hint, a sign of what you’re thinking, what you’re feeling. Before, I could read you so well. Not now.”

  “Before I knew what I thought and felt. Now, I don’t,” I said honestly.

  He looked away for a long moment, and his hand on my waist gripped me tighter. When he viewed me once more, he seemed tormented.

  “Do you still intend to leave, then?”

  “No, Alec,” I said softly. “I plan to stay and marry you.”

  “Why?”

  “Because you said I would.”

  My words hurt him. I saw it in his expression and felt it in his arms but didn’t understand why. Worried what he might do, I stepped close and briefly laid my head on his chest. A sigh heaved from him as he eased away. We swirled around the room in silence for the remainder of the dance, then he brought me back to my drink.

  For the rest of the feast, I set aside the concerns over our future together and danced, ate, and drank until the guests began to leave.

  The candle maker sat patiently in the chair he’d occupied all night, waiting for his wax. With the dwindling crowd, the chair beside him opened. I sat with a sigh.

  “A feast well done, Benella,” he said. “Much like the ones I remember.”

  “Thank you. Would you like me to help gather the wax?”