by Lang, Alice
“I wish she was here earlier. She is amazing in her own way,” Henry said to Patrick though Patrick was more than sure he was talking to himself. “You know, I was thinking about asking her out.”
Henry’s word caused a flap of albatross’ wings in Patrick’s stomach. “What? You barely know her and you want to ask her out?”
Henry gave him a shrug “I thought that’s the whole point of asking people out, right? Because you want to know more about them, get close to them.” He paused and eyed Patrick for a moment. “Why do you care? Are you sure you should be lecturing me about, erm, relationships? They aren’t in your field of expertise.”
Henry was right for once. He couldn’t lecture him about how to date someone when he had never really experienced it for himself. Dating was awkward enough, not to mention falling in love, getting to know another human being on a deeper level. Still, he felt the need to hold Henry back for some reason. “She just met you for God’s sake. She just arrived here half a month ago.”
“I know. I’m not asking her to be my girlfriend. It’s a simple date, hanging out, getting to know each other better. The baby steps into a relationship. What are you, the dating expert?” Henry rolled his eyes and laughed out loud. He was having fun with this. This was one of the things that Henry could best Patrick on, forming a relationship or essentially doing anything that required social engagement.
“If you peel your eyes from your work for a second, Patrick, you will know her life doesn’t always revolves around work like you. Did you know that she has become the receptionist’s best friend? They go to get coffee together on break with me. They also chat on her free time.”
Henry was on a roll. “Did you know that she loves birds and once had a canary that she left back in Romania to move here? Oh, and she drinks black coffee because she hates sweet stuff. Yes, she just arrived here for about two weeks now. But guess what, she’s friendly, and she loves people’s company. She needs a life outside work too, y’know?”
Patrick stared at his brother. No, he never knew about all those things. He realized Sarah had an actual life outside work. Patrick just never asked her about it. The only time he saw her outside work was the first day he invited her out for a quick dinner.
“And why are you telling me all this?”
Henry fidgeted a little and clicked his tongue in the tune of Devil’s Sonata. “I don’t know. I guess I was just hoping for your brotherly opinion. Not that I need your opinion since Sarah is a grown woman. She can make her own choice.”
Patrick didn’t know what to say. It was clear that Henry and Sarah would make a perfect couple. Henry made her laugh, engaged her in conversation she seemed to enjoy, and entertained her with his wit and banter. Everyone loved being around Henry because he was simply fun. Sometimes, Patrick was jealous of his ability to connect with the people around him. Especially his connection to Sarah. Patrick was sure she would love to have someone like Henry by her side.
“I don’t see why you need to ask me,” Patrick ground out. It wasn’t like he should interfere with them anyway. He was prepared to cut Sarah out of his life, had been in the middle of a letter to do so. Maybe he should just leave her to Henry. “Are you sure she’ll agree?”
“Hey, sometimes you just have to take the leap of faith, you know. And I have faith in Sarah and myself.” With that, Henry disappeared into the elevator to his workplace, leaving Patrick all alone with the coffee he never liked. Perhaps he should start to go to Starbucks with the others.
The difference between Patrick and Henry was evident at that moment. Henry would leap while Patrick ran in the other direction. He was afraid of the unknown, detested things he couldn’t control. With a sagging spirit, he realized he would never be brave.
CHAPTER SIX
Sarah was never one of those popular girls that had a circle of friends around her. She wasn’t the kind of girl who got a lot of attention or was featured in the campus magazine aside from getting good grades. She did have a set of friends she kept in touch since her graduation, but she didn’t get to see them very much.
In terms of her love life, she had dated some but had never been in a significant relationship. She always wondered what it was like to fall in love but didn’t imagine it happening to her. Sarah always thought that she would be the kind of person who went on a long painstaking search for that one love in their life. She never thought that ‘love’ would just run into her.
One day out of the blue, Henry asked Sarah a simple question which she failed to answer. “Would you like to go out with me?”
The look on her face made Henry panic, because he began a string of statement that ensured she didn’t have to give him an answer that day and that she could think about it later.
Henry was a very straight forward person. He didn’t play games or try to manipulate people. Unlike her mysterious brother, Henry was simple. And so, he left her to her own thoughts about his simple question. But her brain seemed to have frozen itself in place.
She found herself torn between the two brothers, even though Patrick had not shown any interest in her outside of work. She began to count the differences in the two men and realized there were many.
In contrast with Patrick, who was popular in the world outside this hectic building, Henry was very popular amongst everyone inside. It wasn’t hard to enjoy his company. He was funny and even annoying in a very good kind of way.
Sarah wondered why he wasn’t already in a relationship or had a lover. The rumor mill said it was the “Greenburg” thing. Even their sister Jane seemed to enjoy being alone. Somehow, Sarah started to believe the rumor was true.
Henry had asked the question so easily. There was no mumbling, no stumbling or even an “erm” somewhere in his speech. There wasn’t a joking tone in his voice when he asked her, it seemed as if he meant it.
In her own thoughts, she felt that anyone who said yes would be a very smart person. Henry would be a good boyfriend. He might not be very good with organizing his work, but he was good at taking care of people he cared about. Still, she couldn’t shake the feeling of hesitation. She didn’t know why she hadn’t said yes. She liked Henry; he was a good person, and they seemed very compatible on the surface. Every logical reasoning she could think of would point to the answer: Yes, Sarah should accept Henry’s offer.
It was already three days since he asked her on a date. Every time Sarah saw him, she was reminded. Of course Henry, being a very good gentleman, did not push her or remind her of his offer. He just acted like normal, as if nothing had changed between them. It was another thing she liked about him.
Sarah was on her way to pick up a bunch of coffee from the Starbucks near the building. They had a Starbucks coffee club that everyone could sign up for, and they each took turns in being the delivery person. She had learned it was Henry’s idea. He thought it would boost morale to have the leaders take a turn.
The list of Frappuccino, lattes and double shot espressos made the Barista’s eyebrow shoot up. It would take a while for them to complete the list. Thankfully, she came at a time where there were few people in the cafe. Sarah sat on one of the small armchairs and thought back to Henry again.
“Oh, this is nice. Didn’t know they had a Starbucks service in this firm too.” Sarah was startled by the voice and whipped her head to see the familiar face of Jane Hunt sipping her hot Macchiato with a slight smile.
Ever since Jane became a client of Johnson and Smith, her presence was regularly expected in the office. She was the kind of client every lawyer wished they could have. She was prepared and organized and always on time for her appointments. Although she was a busy woman, she took her time with the case carefully.
Even so, Sarah hadn’t spoken to her beyond a casual greeting. Quite honestly, she was intimated by her. Jane Hunt was the center of attention everywhere she went. A magazine had labeled her The Tigress of the Trading Market. She was one of the most famous business figures in town. It wasn’t hard to feel intimi
dated by her even at a glance.
“I heard it was Henry’s idea,” Sarah said, trying to make small talk and appear casual in the presence of this overbearing woman.
Even though she was intimidated, she admired Jane for her leadership and her way with dealing with her two crazy siblings. She had waltzed into Patrick’s office and put him in his place so easily it had made everyone’s jaw drop. What kind of person was Jane Hunt? Sarah didn’t dare to ask.
“If you had known him since he was little, you would never expect someone like him to be so cheerful and social,” Jane shared, putting down her cup. It wasn’t the kind of description Sarah expected concerning Henry.
“Were you close to Henry? You two seemed to… erm… get along better than Patrick.” Talking about other people’s relationship wasn’t always smart, especially when it concerned distant relationship within the family. Sarah may not know much about the Greenburg siblings but if Jane did not use the same surname as the others and wasn’t married, there must an incidence that had separated the siblings. She could ask Henry or anyone else in the firm, but she didn’t want to sound like paparazzi.
“When we were little, it was the opposite really. I was very close to Patrick. Henry and I don’t really get along. We often fought with each other, and Patrick would be the peacemaker.”
Sarah couldn’t imagine Patrick as the one who broke the fights between two siblings. She couldn’t imagine Henry being the hotheaded one either. Jane probably read the disbelief that must be showing on her face.
Jane chuckled as she opened her purse and then pulled an old photo from her wallet. The Greenburg siblings in their childhood, smiling and hugging each other. Even as they held each other close, Sarah could see Jane and Henry giving a hint of a glare at each other.
The children were adorable. Henry had a small Band-Aid on his forehead, and Patrick looked like an angel, a little boy who made everyone go “Aww” with adoration. He looked nothing like the Patrick she knew.
“Wow, you all looked so cute,” was all she could say. It was true; they were all indeed cute. What could have turned this cute Patrick into the grumpy man she faced every day? “I can’t believe Patrick looked so… relaxed and normal back then.”
Sarah expected Jane to laugh at her comment but instead Jane just rubbed her thumb over his small face. “He used to be so talkative and easy going. Patrick loved to be with other people back then. Perhaps that’s why.” Jane let out a very long sigh. She finished her coffee and folded the photo back into her wallet, “People who seemed like they didn’t care at all sometimes are the people who, in fact, cared too much.”
Jane’s cryptic words were as mysterious as her persona. Jane was a very hard person to read. Her face was often expressionless or sometimes misleading. Her smile had a hidden depth that put Mona Lisa to shame. It only made Sarah even more curious about her and the other Greenburg siblings. “Did something happen that caused Patrick to change?”
“Of course something happened. Our parents divorced and I left with dad,” she answered, leaving Sarah appalled that she had asked such a personal question. But Jane didn’t look tense at all, in fact, she seemed to be enjoying talking about her family.
“Ah… I’m sorry.”
“Why? You did nothing wrong.” Talking with Jane made her very uncomfortable. “Besides, I always thought when people said ‘I’m sorry’ after hearing about my parent divorce, they actually meant they felt sorry for me.”
Sarah was uncomfortable. It wasn’t only because she worked with her brother or even that one of the brothers had asked her out. Jane made her uncomfortable with her straight forward, no nonsense approach on a very sensitive subject. She spoke the first thing that came to her mind without sugar coating it, even if it was something personal. No wonder people were afraid of her. They were afraid of the truth that came from her.
“Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not angry,” Jane tried again after Sarah fell silent. Unlike Jane, who can hide hundreds of emotion behind her human mask, Sarah was an open book. If she felt something, the emotions were transferred directly to all the muscles on her face.
“Were you lonely? Being the only sibling living with your father?” Jane looked surprised by the question. It was the first time Sarah saw Jane looked so surprised. Her mask wasn’t quick enough to hide it. Sarah wondered if she worsened the atmosphere they were already in by asking her more personal questions.
“Ah sorry,” Jane smiled and waved her hand, dismissing Sarah from her worries, “No one has ever asked me that before so I don’t know how to answer it really.”
Yes, no one ever asked Jane Hunt about her feelings. She was the absolute Tigress of the Trading Market. That was why no one ever assumed about her vulnerability. No one ever considered her to be lonely or need someone by her side. She appeared to the world as a strong leader who was out of everyone’s reach. But what did Jane Hunt really think about when she was alone?
“It can be lonely sometimes. Being on the top has that effect on you. People think you are too high above them and are somehow untouchable, but,” Jane shrugged her shoulders and looked sideways, “Sometimes being lonely isn’t always a bad thing. At least for me anyway. If there is anyone who wants me by their side, they can come to me. Other than that, I’m fine on my own.” Jane looked wistfully out the window before continuing. “Why would anyone stick with people who have no courage to step from their comfort zone for someone they wish was in their heart?”
With that, Jane excused herself and waltzed her way out the cafe with the grace of a tigress. Jane had that effect on people. She left them speechless and silent as they pondered on their thoughts. Being on the top created this invisible wall around you. It drove people away as they shy themselves from these prestigious people. Was that how Patrick sometimes felt?
…
Sarah was left alone with three bags of coffee to be delivered to everyone in the office. Everyone’s gloomy face lit up like Christmas lights when the brown paper bags were in their sight. After the coffee had been delivered, Sarah found herself back in Patrick’s office. He was still in the same seat since the time she left, either typing or reading through the papers.
“Took your time. What’s so good about Starbucks anyway? It has the same amount of caffeine as the free coffee machine on this floor.”
“No, it certainly taste better, and it gives me motivation,” she replied with a sip from her cup. She had tried the vile brew some people described as coffee and vowed never to try it again.
Looking at Patrick reminded her of Henry’s question. Should she ask Patrick about it? She had no idea what Patrick might think about her and Henry dating. They might not seem close as a brother, but they were still siblings.
“You have that face again,” Sarah looked up to see Patrick staring at her. “You want to ask me something but hesitate. What is it?”
“If I hesitate there must be some reason for it. It’s nothing important anyway.” Sarah cursed herself for having the most readable face on the planet. Patrick wasn’t going to misread anything either.
“Be out with it. If it’s nothing important then why is it so hard for you to let it out?”
Her clenched fists turned white. What could she say? ‘Your brother asked me to date him’? It should not concern Patrick in the first place. It was a matter that should be settled with Henry so why did she need to put Patrick into the equation?
“Henry asked me out and I’m just thinking about it.” Sarah tried to keep a poker face by following Jane’s model. It shouldn’t be hard but somehow faking something wasn’t Sarah strongest suits. She could hardly control her laugh let alone maintain a poker face.
She had to admit; she was actually curious about Henry’s reaction. What would he say about this matter? Would he actually disagree on her choice and say it would interfere with their work?
“That’s it?” The answer came down to her in an anti-climax motion. She had expected more. Perhaps an outburst on why inner
office dating was a bad idea. Something. Instead, he seemed completely causal. “And here I thought it was work related. I was the one who suggested it to him. It seemed that you two get along well enough to start going out.”
Sarah didn’t know how much Patrick knew about her relationship with Henry. He seemed to think that they were close and that there was some chemistry going on between two of them. Even Sarah herself wasn’t sure that she and Henry were close enough to start dating.
“Of course, he isn’t moping around in the office or locking himself away from the rest of the world like somebody I know.” Patrick felt a slight itch in his nose with the remark. Within a minute, they were back to their usual spatting.
“If you were so sure, then why not say yes to him?” Patrick asked. “You can’t decide that on your own?” Sarah was sure the blood vessel near her temple was visible. She could hear the throbbing of the blood roaring in her ears. Patrick sipped on his horrible machine coffee peacefully as Sarah tried to spin another insult back.
“For your information I wasn’t asking. You asked me if you would remember. It’s clear I shouldn’t have said anything. I forgot that his brother doesn’t care.” Sarah watched him take a drink and then choke on it, several seconds of coughing followed. Sarah just stood there, watching Patrick clean up the mess he had made.
“Thank you, Patrick, for giving me clarity. I know exactly what to do next.” Sarah picked up her phone and texted Henry, three little letters in answer to his simple question. Just like Jane said to her, why should she stick with people who have no courage to step from their comfort zone for someone? Henry was the one who had asked her out. He was the one who put himself on the line and gambled on his faith.
Sarah finally realized why she hesitated at first. She knew that deep down inside, she wished her college hero would take some interest in her. Even if she no longer looked up to him like she used to, a part of her still wanted to be close to him, to get to know him more. She realized now that he never would; he couldn’t, he wasn’t emotionally available that way.
