Buck Me Cowboy: A Secret Baby Romance
Page 39
And Luther relented, but not before jacking up my previous rent by a thousand dollars, with two months prepaid in cash. So I’d practically emptied my bank account and forked over the money, only to drag myself up the rickety stairs and sit silently on the bare floor of my old apartment, huddled against the cold.
With stiff fingers, I dialed my only friend.
“Pink Cherry,” she chirped. “This is Marie, how can I help you?”
“Marie,” I sobbed, “I’ve completely fucked up.”
And some rustling sounded over the line, some fumbling before Marie’s voice came back on.
“Oh my god, are you okay?” she asked, “Sorry, I had to go into the back office, it’s fucking dark in here, who left this shit here?”
I heard something clatter to the floor and smiled through my tears. Trust Marie to come through for me even though I hadn’t talked to her in ages.
“I’m sorry I haven’t reached out,” I said weakly. “It’s just everything changed so much so fast and I got lost in the whirlwind.
“No, no, it’s fine, don’t worry,” reassured Marie. “Besides I’ve been busy with law school and working at the Pink simultaneously. You still going to school too?”
And I paused for a moment, ashamed.
“I dropped out,” I said in a tiny voice, feeling about two inches tall. “I got so caught up with Nick and Luxor and my new life that I let it slide.”
A slow, contemplative silence for a moment before Marie spoke again.
“Oh honey,” she said. “I’m so sorry to hear that. You know that you still have to lead your own life, you can’t pin everything on a man, it’s just a recipe for disaster. Did you stop going to classes altogether?”
And I choked a little.
“Yes,” I admitted. “I didn’t mean to at first!” I protested. “I wanted to keep working during the day and go to classes at night but you know my boss moved me into his building and I was going over to his place late at night,” I said, ashamed.
Marie just clucked again.
“Trust me honey, I can guess. A guy comes along and sweeps you off your feet, puts you up in a swanky place, it feels like it’s going to last forever right? But the thing is that Cinderella’s coach always turns back into a pumpkin, it’s just a question of when.”
And the bitterness in my throat was so sour that I almost choked, unable to say anything. But Marie stepped in again.
“Don’t worry about it,” she said kindly. “You can always pick yourself up, you’re not dead. Where are you now?”
“At my old place,” I whispered, still huddled on the floor of the bare apartment.
“That dump?” she said, her voice wry. “That place that has the mice and cockroaches?”
I surveyed the floor in front of me. Thank god, nothing was skittering around at the moment, just a loose cupboard door dangling sadly, waving slightly in the cold air.
“No, no rodents or insects right now,” I said dully, the energy seeping out of me once more.
And I could almost hear the blonde shaking her head in pity.
“Honey, why don’t you come down to the Pink Cherry and we’ll chat?” she said. “It’s cozy here, we have comfy sofas, and I just got a new stash of some awesome Ceylon tea. We’ll have a cup and you’ll feel better,” she said persuasively.
I checked my metro ticket. Yep, just enough for two rides, one down and one back. I felt exhausted, and sipping some tea with a friend while letting my weary bones relax would be just the thing.
“Thanks,” I said quietly. “I’ll be there in about forty-five, leaving now.”
And scrambling to my feet, I hugged myself in the cold of the apartment. Another chilly stream of air seeped in through the window and I shivered all the way down to my bones, my hands ice cold, my body shaking with uncontrollable tremors. The thing is, I didn’t know if the tremors were from the freeze … or from missing Nick, my life, my love.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Tammy
The chimes rang softly as I let myself into the Pink Cherry. It’d been so long since I’d been to the shop but it was just as I remembered. The space was brightly lit with cheery signs that read, “His Stuff,” “Her Stuff,” and “Extreme Restraints,” among other helpful tidbits. Yep, everything was just as I remembered.
I caught a glimpse of Marie helping a customer and waved discreetly to her before making my way to the counter, sitting perched on a stool. My friend came bustling over soon, giving me a big hug.
“Oof, must be cold outside,” she said with a smile. “You feel like a popsicle.”
I gave her a wan smile back.
“Yeah, it’s freezing, I didn’t have time to get my winter jacket.”
The truth was my winter jacket was still at The Meridien, waiting to be shipped to my new digs. Cringing, my heart crumpled slightly again, the coat a reminder of what had once been.
“So get me up to speed,” chattered my blonde friend, pouring two steaming cups of tea. “What’s new?”
Taking a grateful sip, I began slowly.
“Well, you know that my boss, Nick Martin, moved me into his apartment building,” I said.
Marie snorted.
“He should! The way he was banging you at work, he owed you big time.”
I just shook my head slowly.
“It’s not whether Nick should or shouldn’t have, it’s just that I thought I was the only one,” I explained in a quiet voice. “I thought I was special to him when actually I was just one girl among many.”
And Marie gasped.
“What do you mean?” she asked. “He was banging other chicks?” she asked, her eyes wide.
I nodded slowly, my cheeks flushing.
“Nick Martin is a manwhore,” I said bitterly. “He plays with women, gets them to love him, but he’s actually playing a couple violins at once. Get it? He’s strumming several instruments simultaneously, making us all think we’re the only ones, that we’re special.”
Marie was silent again.
“What, did they all live on the same floor as you guys?” she asked. “Was the Meridien like some kind of whore hotel?”
And I paused, thinking.
“No, only Nick and I had apartments on that floor, but then again, there are only two apartments per floor. The other women probably lived nearby,” I said, my face crumpling.
Marie sipped her tea slowly, thoughtful.
“Okay, that could be true,” she granted. “But did you ever see any other women?” she pressed.
“No,” I admitted, “but I have other proof.”
And that’s when I launched into a monologue, my throat clutching as I recounted last night’s events.
“I went by his apartment a little early yesterday evening and heard all these moans and shudders, all these “Oh Nicks!”” I choked, feeling nauseated again. “And then this bitch Jeanette came waltzing out, her hair all messed-up and her clothes on wrong. I know he was fucking her,” I said frozenly, reeling with hurt.
But Marie didn’t let up so easily.
“Did you ask him about it?” she inserted gently. “What did Nick say?”
“I confronted him but he didn’t say anything,” I replied dully, my eyes listless. “He didn’t defend himself, didn’t say a word,” I repeated again.
Marie paused, looking puzzled before speaking.
“That’s weird. Mr. Martin didn’t defend himself? Usually guys like this are manipulators, they’ll gaslight you, make you think that everything you saw was a mirage, make you question yourself. He didn’t do any of that?” she asked quizzically while taking another sip of tea.
I shook my head miserably.
“Everything just happened so fast, you know, I tore into his office ready to confront him and then I … I … I found panties in his suit jacket pocket,” I choked, tears welling up again. This was the humiliating part, that I’d been so trusting, so naïve. I’d been a fucking dunce and Nick had worked me for what it was worth.
“I take it they were another woman’s panties, right?” my friend said gently. “They weren’t yours?”
“They definitely weren’t mine,” I said vehemently. “These were so disgusting, they were crusted and gross, and it was obvious she’d creamed into them.”
Marie leaned back and giggled slightly, trying to look serious even as she held a hand over her mouth
“I know it’s TMI,” I said huffily, sitting up straighter, “but seriously, there was all this crusted gunk, it was flaking off like dandruff or some shit, totally ratched.”
And Marie lost her battle then, bursting out into full-fledged laughter, gale force gasps that made the few customers in the store turn to stare our way. I was so mad and humiliated at once that I glared at her, my eyes volcanic.
“I’m glad you still have a sense of humor,” I said frigidly, “when my life has been ruined.”
And the blonde heaved and gasped, trying to sit up straight on her small stool but failing, bent double from deep belly laughs.
“Honey, I’m so sorry, I know you’re in pain,” she apologized through wheezing chuckles, “It’s just … you’re a really funny girl, you know that?”
I wouldn’t even grace that with a reply, instead shooting her another frigid glare. How could she think this was funny? Hello, I was suffering in the ninth circle of Hell.
“Okay, okay,” replied my friend, holding her hand up in an appeasing gesture, schooling her expression into a reasonable semblance of seriousness. “I got it now, I’m under control,” she said, just a quirk of her mouth giving her away. “So you found the panties and what did Nick say then?”
And I wailed again.
“He didn’t say anything! He just stood there and took it!”
But Marie leaned back and shook her head.
“Not one thing? He didn’t say one thing to defend himself?” she asked, eyebrow raised somewhat skeptically.
“No, nothing at all!” I wailed. “Nothing at alllllll!” my voice rose about an octave higher, causing customers to look over at us again. Shit, I was going to get Marie fired if we kept carrying on this way.
But the blonde was unperturbed and took another sip of tea.
“Something’s off here,” she said musingly, her eyes contemplative as she looked off into the distance. “Something tells me that the situation’s seriously off. Guys who see multiple women usually have excuses, they try to justify it somehow. ‘Humans aren’t meant to be monogamous,’ ‘Neanderthals had multiple partners,’ heck, even ‘Mohammed had four wives’ and shit like that. Mr. Martin didn’t say anything of the kind?” she asked, eyebrow arched.
I shook my head miserably.
“Nope, nothing,” I replied in a small voice.
Marie was silent again.
“Hold on, let’s back up for a sec and tell me again exactly what happened when you confronted him,” she encouraged.
I took a deep breath, the events so painful, the wound throbbing excruciatingly.
“I was in Nick’s office but he wasn’t there yet,” I recounted, frozen. “I wandered around and saw that his jacket pocket was bulging a little and reached in. Voila! Out tumbled the panties,” I shuddered again at the memory. “Nick came back and I launched myself at him, screaming epithets, I was furious.” God, the memory made me want to bury myself alive, it was literally the lowest point in my life.
“And then what happened?” my friend asked, her eyes encouraging.
“And then nothing!” I finished emphatically. “Mr. Martin said nothing and I ran out of there.”
Silence from my friend again as she looked into her teacup.
“Well,” she mused. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but …”
“But what?” I pressed, my voice sharp. “What?” Anything would help, I was dying for scraps.
“Well,” she began slowly, “Do you think it’s possible that …? Don’t take this the wrong way, Tammy, but do you think it’s possible that you didn’t give him time to answer? That you were like a rocket exploding in a small space, all fire and fury and vengeance, and then just took off before he could get a word in?”
“No,” I shook my head vehemently. “He had a chance, he could have spoken if he wanted to.”
But Marie shook her head.
“I’m not so sure honey,” she said gently. “Just step back for a moment and think,” she added soothingly. “Today, you rushed out of the office, you rushed up to the Bronx, manhandled your way into your old apartment, and then rushed back down here and burst into the Pink Cherry. Maybe all the rushing around was … ah, a little rushed, and left no time for explanations?” she suggested.
I stopped to contemplate for a moment.
“It’s true, I’ve gotten around a lot today,” I admitted. “Covered a lot of mileage. But that doesn’t mean I cut Nick off in any way or interrupted him.”
“No Tammy,” interjected Marie gently. “What I mean is that you never gave the man a chance to explain. You never gave him a chance to put out his side of the story, relay his point of view. It’s not even a question of interrupting, it’s that he couldn’t get a word in edgewise to begin with.”
And I sat on my stool, pondering as my brain dashed in all sorts of directions. Was it true? Had I been so furious that I’d jumped the gun and fled, without giving him a chance to explain, to put something, anything out there? And sensing my doubt, Marie confirmed it.
“You didn’t give him any time, did you?” she said kindly. “You just hurled the accusations at him and took off, right?”
And slowly, I nodded.
“I guess … I guess I was just so angry, you know? There were two pieces of really strong evidence, seeing Jeanette come out of his apartment and the used panties.” I took a deep breath. “Besides, what could Nick possibly say to justify it? Seriously, you have to admit this shit is pretty damning.”
But Marie just shrugged.
“Honey, I honestly don’t know. But I’m in law school now, remember? And one thing I’ve learned is to listen to the whole story, try and see both sides of the picture before rendering judgment. Tammy,” she said gently. “I know you don’t want to hear this but you may have jumped to conclusions. For someone who was as invested as he was, the behavior just sounds odd. Give Nick a chance to explain, hear him out.”
And with a big sigh, I nodded, exhaling slowly. I felt a little calmer now, like my chakra was aligning once more, the Earth rotating in a way I recognized. Maybe Marie had a point. I couldn’t imagine any possible explanations for what had happened, but it was true that I hadn’t given Nick a chance to explain before I’d jumped the gun and come to my own conclusions.
So I took another deep breath and another bracing sip of tea, the hot liquid scalding my tongue. Tomorrow would be another day and I’d confront the billionaire then … whatever the consequences.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Tammy
The elevator pinged and I stepped into the reception on the thirtieth floor. Nothing was different at Luxor, the space decorated in luxurious shades of beige and white, the walls gleaming. But what did I expect? Even if my world had been torn apart, it didn’t mean that the company was crashing, that bricks were falling from the sky.
So I took a deep breath and approached the reception desk. Norma, bless her heart, smiled at me, her eyes twinkling.
“Hi Tammy,” the elderly lady said, her voice kind. “Good to see you.”
“Hey Norma,” I said, trying to look calm despite my racing heart. “Is there any way to see Mr. Martin today? Is he in his office?”
And I dreaded the reply, half expecting the grey-haired woman to say something along the lines of “Oh I’m sorry, Mr. Martin has flown to Europe and won’t be back for two months.” If I got that answer, I wasn’t sure what I’d do because it meant that Nick didn’t want to see
me ever again and was giving me the soft send-off.
But Norma’s hands flew on the computer and she pursed her lips.
“Wait right here,” she said. “Take a seat and let me check.”
I wandered on wobbling legs over to a plush leather couch. Oh god, what if she came back with an answer/nonanswer, the kind that was a polite no?
But within minutes, Norma was back with a kind smile.
“Mr. Martin says to go right in,” she said with a wink. “I trust you know where he sits?”
And I flushed. Was she alluding to something that I didn’t know? But I brushed it out of my mind, shooting the old lady a grateful smile before getting up and bracing my shoulders. I still had to face the She-Dragon, that bitch Jeanette, who was likely waiting for me with her claws out even now, ready to draw blood. Taking a deep breath, I propelled myself forward, willing myself to breathe, donning a suit of invisible armor. I pasted an empty smile on my face in anticipation of war.
But to my surprise, her station was empty. And I mean, empty, empty, not like ‘gone to the bathroom’ or ‘back in five’ empty. There was no computer anymore, no printer, no binders, just a couple post-its and a stapler, like her workstation had been deserted.
My eyebrows knitted as I stared for a moment. Had Jeanette been transferred somewhere? Was she demoted to the building basement, where I used to sit? Or maybe, just maybe, a small voice in my mind whispered, the blonde had been fired and I’d seen the last of the viper. My heart started fluttering again for reasons I couldn’t understand, but I squared my shoulders resolutely and knocked on Nick’s door, the oak loud and resonant.
The billionaire’s deep growl rang out immediately.
“Come,” came the curt command. Oh shit, that was fast.
Tentatively, I pushed open the heavy door, letting myself into the spacious office. Taking a deep breath, I allowed myself a quick glance around. Again, everything was as I remembered, not an item out of place, everything immaculate, polished, gleaming from head to toe. The floor to ceiling view was still gorgeous, Central Park in the midst of the changing of the colors, leaves vibrantly yellow, red and orange through the glass panes.