Love's Dream Song

by Leesmith, Sandra

  “Thank goodness. This primitive stuff is fine for these gung-ho Amazons, but I’ll take wine in crystal, served in the comfort of my bed.”

  Jess’s laughter ground Autumn’s annoyance deeper. Amazons, indeed. At least she wasn’t window dressing for her job.

  Autumn inwardly groaned, aware of the cattiness of her thoughts. She should be thankful the reporter had Jess’s attention.

  She closed her eyes and, for a while, managed to shut out the sight of Jess and the blonde reporter. The breeze fanned her cheeks as she concentrated on the familiar sounds. Under the hum of voices she could hear the song of the tree frog, its cry eerie in the desert night. She longed for the solitude that had been hers this past year.

  At first, she’d been frightened of all the night sounds, but now they were welcome. The desert had seemed vast and lonely, but she’d learned to see the beauty that abounded. For several minutes she let the thoughts of that beauty balance her emotions.

  “Don’t tell me you’re asleep,” a low voice murmured.

  Autumn opened her lids and found herself staring into silver-gray eyes. Unexpected warmth crept in and she smiled at Jess. “It would be impossible in this crowd.” She wondered why he was no longer talking to television’s fashion queen.

  “Looks like we have everyone we need for the dig.” Jess surprised her further when he settled on the rock she was leaning against. “We’ve got a surveyor, cartographer, stratographer—the works. I’m surprised he didn’t bring more students, though.”

  Autumn’s gaze drifted to where Wayne Carson sorted through his and the professor’s gear. “I don’t think he wanted to bother with training them. Wayne and I already know how he operates.”

  “You going to like doing all this digging around?”

  “It gives you a feeling of oneness with the earth. I’ve spent a year hiking this place.” She observed the circle of faces shadowed by firelight. “Once I get used to a crowd again, I’m going to be glad to have someone to talk to for a change.”

  Jess lowered himself from the boulder and settled into the sand beside her. “It’s been lonely for you?”

  Again she wondered why he was so nice all of a sudden. She wanted to be annoyed, but couldn’t stop the yearning and desire. “Most of the time I don’t mind it, but since I grew up in a big family, I guess I miss all the people. We were always entertaining, and the variety was never dull. One day my father would introduce us to the Rothschilds, and the next day, street people would be sitting in the parlor.”

  “You haven’t had much social life this past year.”

  Autumn wondered if he was going to decide now to discuss their broken relationship. She wasn’t sure she was ready for it. “Being alone in the wilderness makes you face up to yourself. I’ve grown to love the desert country.”

  Looking up, they both followed the rough line of steep canyon walls to the star-laden sky. Light from the moon cast jagged shadows in the sandstone.

  “It’s different here—not lush and green, like most people picture nice scenery,” she commented as she returned her attention to the camp fire. “It’s harsh, but it makes the beauty stand out.”

  “You stand out.”

  “Do I?” Her glance flew to his and became captured.

  “You’re like a rare gem sparkling in the desert sand.”

  A combination of wistfulness and reluctance sounded in his voice, and Autumn realized he was as uneasy about their close proximity as she was. She decided to lighten the mood.

  “You sound like my brothers—full of blarney.”

  “O’Neill? Hmmm—Irish brothers—guess I’d better watch my step.”

  “Not to worry. They’re miles away.”

  “But they used to protect you?” He straightened his shoulders.

  “Used to be gung-ho champions. It made dating difficult in high school.” An ache drifted through her. “They haven’t been too pleased with me lately.”

  His interest seemed to heighten as he leaned toward her. “Why?”

  She hesitated a moment, aware of others within hearing distance, but they all seemed busy with their own conversations and private thoughts. She returned her attention back to Jess, trying to figure out if he was really that interested.

  “I wanted to find out who my real family was. I think they are hurt by that.” She still suffered remorse about the pain she caused her family because of this quest. She tried to assure them that she felt their love and knew she belonged to them. It was just that she needed to know her biological family.

  Jess didn’t react. His expression remained immobile while he held her attention with his eyes. “Are they involved in this search?”

  Autumn’s tension eased a notch. “No. They’re natural sons of my adoptive parents. But, you see, I wanted to know about my Navajo heritage. Donny and Mike think I’m crazy.” She shrugged. “Maybe they don’t like to think of me as part Indian.”

  Was he concealing a flare of emotion? It had been too brief a glimpse for her to tell exactly what it was. Her instincts suggested bitterness or resentment. There were also shades of the disdain he’d shown before today.

  She closed her eyes and leaned her head against the rock. His look reminded her of her brothers. They thought she was daft, hanging around where she wasn’t wanted.

  Her brothers were only half of it. Her mother resented Autumn’s attempts to establish ties with her Navajo relatives. It was her father who understood her need to seek out her biological roots. He’d been the only one to approve. But then, he knew the value of family ties. The O’Neills were close-knit and treasured the family history that went all the way back to castles in Ireland.

  Jess stood; Autumn was not surprised. She expected him to leave, but he held out his hand for her to grasp.

  “Let’s get away from here. Walk with me.”

  The invitation was a clear indication of interest. Did he really want to be near her? She shook her head. “No, thanks.”

  To her surprise he knelt back down. “Worried?” he gestured to the group. “Surely not about what they’re going to think.”

  For several moments she searched his expression, certain now there were ulterior motives behind his request. “What’s up, Jess? Why are you really here?” Maybe he pictured the dig as an opportunity to renew their relationship. The thought both warmed and annoyed her.

  He shrugged and appeared nonchalant, but she could tell he wasn’t. Too much tension radiated from him.

  “There are a lot of people here. This is my ranch…”

  “Seems to me, as I recall, you had demanding responsibilities in September.” That’s what he’d told her last year when she’d questioned him about his evasive behavior. “Roundup, wasn’t it?”

  His expression closed. “The cattle are being driven to winter pasture.”

  “And they don’t need your guidance this year?” Her sarcasm emphasized the last words.

  “My foreman’s capable of handling it.”

  “But he wasn’t last year?” She stood, her unexpected anger fueled by hurt.

  “What happened last year has nothing to do with this.” He reached for her arm.

  She shook off his hand. “Evidently not. Obviously this is more important than our relationship.”

  His mouth clamped shut as he glared a warning. The silence around them penetrated her emotions. The people near them were staring.

  Jess spoke low so they couldn’t hear. “You ready for that walk now?”

  Anxious to escape the curiosity, she nodded and allowed him to lead her away.

  His fingers were warm, his grip firm. As they wove their way through the crowd scattered around the fire, she attempted to appear unmoved.

  He grasped her hand and helped her around a washed-up log. Gravel crunched underfoot as they picked their way by moonlight up the flat wash of the canyon floor. Boulders piled in jumbled formations lined the edges like the walls of a giant maze. Thorny bushes reached out and grab at their clothing. Jess pushed
a long branch aside for her to pass by.

  When she stepped close, Jess realized he was much more aware of her than he wanted to be. He should only be concerned about her possible connection to this drug ring. Yet when she brushed against him, involuntary longings raced up his arm. Her perfume mingled with the earthy scents of the desert air—wildflowers and sage. He took a deep breath and enjoyed the proud way she walked. It had pleased him to watch how she carried her height with such poise and ease through the crowd of people.

  Ever since he’d been with her in the ruins this afternoon, he’d wanted her. He wanted to kiss those lips that smiled so readily, press her flesh against his, and feel her heart race with anticipation—like his did now. It was pure lust for her body. He tried to convince himself it was nothing more.

  When they’d covered some distance, she slowed her pace and let him walk beside her. “Jess,” she murmured, “what happened between us? Why are you with me now after all this time? Are you trying to pretend the last few months never existed?”

  He wished they hadn’t. “Whoa,” he said instead. “Slow down and give me one question at a time.” And how was he going to answer them? He couldn’t just come right out and accuse her of running drugs. He longed to confront her and get it over with, but that never worked. He’d blow his carefully protected cover.

  “We had something between us. I know it was special for you. What happened?”

  “Maybe it wasn’t so special,” he lied.

  She stopped, her abruptness catching him off guard. He faced her, wishing he could see her expression more clearly.

  “I don’t believe that,” she told him. “It’s something else—something that has nothing to do with you and me. Can’t you talk about it?”

  “No.” That was the truth, at least. “Let’s keep going.”

  He could tell she wasn’t buying that and he didn’t blame her. There was no point in elaborating. He couldn’t even explain to himself why he tormented them with this walk.

  For several minutes they proceeded in silence. Suddenly she tugged on his arm and pulled him to a stop. Before he could utter a sound, she placed her fingers over his mouth. “Listen,” she whispered close to his ear.

  He went still—alert and curious. Voices came from behind the rocks to their right, a man and a woman. But Jess couldn’t make out what they were saying.

  “Let’s get a little closer,” he whispered against her hair.

  “We’d better go back.” Her breath fanned his cheek.

  He should follow her suggestion, but he didn’t want to leave. He might learn something useful.

  “I want to hear what they are saying.” Jess pressed against the rock. “Move carefully,” he whispered.

  Cautiously, they edged closer to the rocks. He hesitated. What if it were a couple seeking privacy? Just as he pulled back on Autumn’s hand, he heard Connie Turner’s angry voice.

  “You hauled me all the way out here in this forsaken wilderness to ask a favor? You said you had something big. I’m not about to give you publicity just because you ask for it. What kind of reporter do you think I am?”

  His attention captured now, Jess inched forward with Autumn. The next voice interested him more than Connie’s.

  Wayne Carson!

  “This story is news and it’s getting you some attention, but not like a hot issue could. That’s what you really want, isn’t it?”

  “How? By blowing up the ruins?” Connie’s sarcasm was sharp. “Or maybe murdering someone out here in the wilds?”

  “My dad’s on a lot of important committees in Congress. He can get you the inside scoop on congressional hearings.”

  “Why didn’t you say so in the first place?” Connie’s anger suddenly disappeared. “Just who is this famous father of yours?”

  “Dirk Carson.”

  “Senator Carson—from Colorado?”

  “The one and only.”

  A whistle bounced around the canyon walls.

  “Sh. Do you want everyone to know we’re here?” Wayne’s voice lowered, but Autumn and Jess had moved close enough to hear clearly .

  “What exactly did you have in mind?” she asked in a curt tone. Jess could just imagine the speculation running through the reporter’s head. Senator Carson was popular in the Southwest.

  “This discovery has been big news. I want you to make it bigger and include my name every time you mention Dr. Davidson’s.”

  “And in exchange?”

  “You name it. When you want info from Dad…” He shrugged, his voice trailing off.

  Silence settled between the canyon walls. Jess began to wonder if he and Autumn should hide, in case the two stomped out.

  “So we understand each other.” Connie’s voice became hard. “We’ll work together on one condition—I call the shots.”

  “Agreed.”

  “Now tell me exactly what you want.”

  Jess held his breath.

  Wayne continued. “Archaeology’s a hard field to get into. There are only a few positions that are worth anything.”

  “And all this publicity will put your name at the top.”

  “Right.”

  “Can’t your father pull strings for you?”

  “He doesn’t approve of my choices. He wants me to take over the family business so he’ll have more time to play big shot politician.”

  Jess could sympathize with that. He’d had the same problem with his father. Only it turned out that Jess liked operating the ranch, as long as he could continue his extracurricular work for the government.

  “I’m getting the picture now,” Connie stated.

  “Good. Let’s get back to camp before we’re missed.”

  That statement brought Jess upright. He grabbed Autumn’s waist and shoved her between two towering rocks.

  Rough stone pressed into his flesh on one side and the soft curves of Autumn’s body on the other. They both held their breath as the pair passed by. Connie stumbled and complained while Wayne helped her along.

  Silence again claimed the night until a coyote’s howl seemed to say it was safe to come out. Autumn edged away, leaving a draft of crisp air.

  “We’d better get back, too,” she said, a note of concern in her voice.

  “No.” He pulled on her arm to stop her from following. He didn’t want to take a chance that the pair would see them. “Let’s wait a little longer.”

  She tugged against his hold. He stared down at her profile in the moonlight—the high cheekbones and straight nose. He knew exactly how to delay her. It would be in the line of duty.

  Her long hair draped her shoulders. He tangled his fingers in the silky strands and eased her close. At first she resisted, but when his lips brushed hers, she melted against him. That action sent his own mind flying. Forgotten were the words they’d just overheard. Forgotten was his special assignment. He even forgot who he was and where they were. Every sense focused on the magic of her touch and the lightning that charged through his body when his lips pressed against hers.

  Alarmed, Jess pulled back. He read the surprise in her eyes and quickly masked his own.

  “Just a delay tactic,” he explained, annoyed at the huskiness in his voice.

  She didn’t respond. Her eyes shone in the moonlight, reminding him of the black stones—the Apache tears—that Daya always wore around her neck.

  He wouldn’t apologize. “It’s clear. We can go back now.”

  For what seemed like an endless second, she remained unmoving. Then, just as abruptly as his last move, she swiveled and strode toward camp. Jess breathed a sigh of relief as he followed.

  It was difficult to believe he’d been near her one whole day. It seemed like a week. He’d give overtime to his ranch hands to be with them now. They’d be bickering over positions for the roundup. He’d bet on it. Even Charlie’s coffee wouldn’t be as bitter as the taste now in his mouth.

  The second day of the dig dawned and Autumn quickly arose. Yesterday had gone smoothly,
but today could be another matter. The excitement of the new discovery was bound to keep emotions running high. Her own nerves were already taut.

  The sun wouldn’t reach the canyon floor for hours because of the high walls. That didn’t stop the eager group from arising at the first traces of light. They barely took time to heat coffee and down a quick breakfast before climbing the cliffs to the ruins. Autumn followed them as they explored the rooms built in the overhang. She should have been caught up in the excitement of the moment, but in spite of her efforts, her interest flagged.

  Over and over again, she played the scene of the night before with Jess. What had their kiss meant to him? It had devastated her, bringing up a flood of memories, sensations, and emotions she’d buried deep in her heart.

  Love flowed through the broken cracks of her composure as she stole glances at the rancher. Lines splayed from his eyes and etched one cheek. Had he spent a sleepless night, also? He eased from sight behind one of the reporters and Autumn returned her attention to Dr. Davidson, who was gathering the crowd together on the shelf that overlooked the canyon.

  “You can see that the women sat here to gossip and grind corn.” The professor pointed to the shallow holes in the rock floor.

  His remark drew a few chuckles until one of the scientists spoke up. “These ruins are impressive, but nothing I’ve seen so far proves your theories. In fact, there’s evidence…” He pointed to some initials and a date carved into the sandstone. “…that shows these have been discovered before.”

  “That’s true. In fact, the owner of the property,” he gestured toward Jess, “showed me these ruins.”

  “How did you find the artifacts, then? Wouldn’t they have been pilfered by now?”

  “The ruins had been dug out, but I found something everyone else had overlooked. Come with me.”

  Dr. Davidson led the group to the small room built in the far left corner of the cliff. “Inside this cave I found the collection of stone tablets. The history of the Anasazi were written on these.”

  Standing in the corner of the room, Autumn watched the men and women take turns peering in to the dark hole. She knew it smelled damp and musty from the trickles of water that seeped down the far wall. Light from the lantern cast eerie shadows.