After I Fall

by Amity Hope

  He laughed. “Until this summer, the only job I’ve had was bagging groceries. Talk about dull. I worked at the same place for three years. My uncle said he’d get me a job at the bar he works at, when I’m older.” He frowned. “Not sure if that will be happening now.”

  “Your uncle?” He’d mentioned him before, but only briefly.

  “Yeah. I lived with him the last year or so. He’s a bartender. He didn’t get home ‘til two, three in the morning a lot of the time. If he came home at all. That got back to social services and, here I am.”

  “They wouldn’t let you stay with him?” I thought it was usually in the best interest to keep a kid with family. But what did I know?

  He shrugged. “I’m not so sure he tried all that hard to keep me. To be honest, it was probably a relief for him to see me go.”

  “Was this uncle your dad’s brother or your mom’s?”

  “Uh…my mom’s. You know what? I should flag down our waitress. I need the tab so we can get going. Wouldn’t want to be late for my first play,” he said. He fidgeted as his eyes scanned the restaurant.

  “Nope, wouldn’t want that,” I muttered.

  Our waitress came over, gave us our bill and cleared away our plates. Eric insisted on paying, which I felt a little bad about since I’d invited him. The flipside to that was it gave me a reason to ask him out again, so I could pay next time.

  Once we were outside, he took my hand and started to lead me toward the parking lot.

  “Actually,” I said as I stopped walking, “the playhouse is only about four blocks away. Should we just walk?”

  “Let’s do that,” he said. Then he paused. “As long as you know which direction we’re going?”

  “This way,” I said as I tugged at his hand. There weren’t many people out at this time on a Saturday night. Most of the stores we walked past were closed for the evening.

  “That was really sweet of Lisa to give us her tickets,” I said.

  “Yeah, it was,” he agreed.

  “Thank her for me, will you?”

  “Sure, I can do that.”

  “So,” I carefully began, “they’re pretty nice people?”

  I was mentally bracing myself, waiting for him to shut down. To my delight he didn’t.

  “Actually, they really are. The first week was pretty awkward. But now it’s not so bad. Lisa’s always asking me how I’m doing, how my work day was.” He squeezed my hand. “She wanted to know if I had a good time with you last night.” He laughed self-consciously. “I told her about the mix-up. That I didn’t realize it was a date. She got a kick out of that. So did Tim. That’s why she was insistent I take the tickets tonight. She thought I needed to make up for that.”

  “And Tim? He’s nice too?”

  “He is. He was the one who helped me get the job with the landscaping company. He’s always trying to get me to go fishing with him,” Eric said.

  “You should go!”

  He sliced a confused look my way. “Why?”

  “Because it’s fun!” His confused look remained in place. “Haven’t you ever gone fishing?” He shook his head. “You should try it.”

  “You like fishing?” He sounded incredulous.

  “Yes, don’t look so surprised. My dad used to take me all the time. I love fishing. It’s so relaxing to be out on the water. It’s the best way to spend a summer day. I haven’t gone the last few summers and I kind of miss it. The next time Tim asks, take him up on it,” I urged.

  He nodded though he didn’t look convinced. “I suppose I can try it.”

  “Try it!” I said as I bounced on my feet a bit. “Try it and tell me you don’t love it!”

  He laughed at my enthusiasm. “You know what? You really surprise me.”

  “How so?” I asked as I narrowed my eyes at him.

  “The first time I saw you at the country club, I thought you were the nanny. Then when I found out that you lived in that huge house, I thought you’d end up being a snob, but you’re not. You love peonies and fishing. You like food you can eat with your hands. And you drive an awesome car. I never would’ve guessed any of that by looking at you that first day, watching you watch your sisters.”

  I made a little humming noise as we neared the Roseville Playhouse. “So you were watching me, hmmm?”

  He laughed. “I was definitely watching you.”

  “Well that surprises me,” I said.

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know. All those girls lined up in their tiny little bikinis along the pool? They seem a little more attention grabbing.” I was teasing but I was also serious.

  He made a scoffing sound. “No. You were the one that had my attention. Those other girls? They just try too hard. And I’m not sure why. I mean, who are they trying to impress? That Jace guy?”

  I had nothing to say to that so I just smiled, surprised by his admission.

  He tugged at my hand and pulled me into an alcove. It led into a craft shop but it was closed this late in the evening. He pulled me into his arms, then tightened the hold as he drew me close enough to whisper in my ear.

  “Can I tell you a secret?” he asked.

  “Absolutely.” My hands slid up, gripping his biceps. I held on as my knees melted beneath me.

  “I’ve been wanting to do this for weeks.” He leaned in, his lips pressing gently against mine. It was a short, sweet kiss. A perfect first kiss because it held a promise of more to come.

  “I think…I think I like your secrets,” I whispered back.

  “Good,” he said as we moved onto the sidewalk. “Because I think I have a few more where that came from.”

  Chapter 10

  “How was your date?” Mom asked as she breezed into the pool house. Without knocking. Of course. Considering that technically it was hers, she felt she didn’t need to. No amount of reminding her it was a common courtesy had helped.

  I needed to remember to lock the door behind us when Roscoe and I came back in from his morning walk.

  She took a seat on the chair across from me.

  “Well?” she pressed.

  “I had a really good time,” I admitted. It had been the best date I’d ever been on. Granted, I didn’t have a whole lot of dates in my dating repertoire. But still, I’d had a fantastic time. The play was hilarious. There had been scenes that made me laugh until I had tears in my eyes. I would definitely keep plays on my list of things to do.

  Along with long kisses goodnight.

  “Two dates in a row.” Mom cut into my musing.

  I nodded even though she was stating the obvious. Or at least, what she thought was obvious. I hadn’t clued her in to the misunderstanding Friday night. That seemed pointless.

  I had been lying on the couch, my feet dangling over the arm as I flipped through the channels, desperate for something to watch. I swung myself around into a sitting position so I could face her.

  “Will there be a third date soon?”

  “There’s nothing planned, but yeah, I think so.” I smiled. I couldn’t help it. It just crept onto my face. Not that I tried to push it away.

  “Well, that’s nice. Be sure to thank Phillip for helping things move along with you two,” she said.

  “What does that mean?” I asked. I knew I had an edge to my tone.

  “Wasn’t it Phillip who sent the two of you off to lunch together? Even picked up the tab? It sounds to me like you owe him a thank you.”

  “I thanked him for lunch. But I’m not thanking him for anything else. I got to know Eric on my own.”

  “I wish you weren’t still so antagonistic toward him,” Mom said.

  “I haven’t been! I mean, I’ve been trying.” I had been trying. But that didn’t mean I was willing to give him any credit for the budding relationship between Eric and me.

  “Whatever it is you feel about Phillip, you need to understand he’d do anything for his children, including you.”

  That was the wrong thing for her to say.

>   “I am not his child,” I firmly stated.

  Her words had sent my mental walls right back up again. Lately, they’d been crumbling just a bit. But her blatantly out of line comment had me stacking them right back up again. I had a dad…and Phillip wasn’t him.

  I just wanted to stay out of his way.

  And I hoped he’d stay out of mine.

  “There’s something you should know about that car you love so much,” she said quietly. She began picking at an imaginary piece of lint on the chair.

  I hated when she did that.

  “Dad’s car,” I clarified.

  “Yes, your father’s car. I’m sure you were well aware that when your father died, the medical bills he left behind were astronomical. Insurance covered a lot, but not all.”

  I felt my irritation rise to the surface. I didn’t like talking about Dad’s illness with Mom. There was too much distance between them at the end. It felt wrong. It felt as if I was invading his privacy because Mom had given up her right to any part of his life.

  “There were bill collectors, EmLynn.”

  She said this as if the statement should make everything clear. It didn’t.

  “And?” I pressed.

  “And your father had taken out a second mortgage on his house. The only thing he had left of value was that car.”

  My stomach tangled itself into a knot. In the back of my mind, I knew what she was going to say but a stubborn little mental block kept the thought from fully forming.

  “They had every right to that car. They had every intention of taking the car. They would’ve sold it, at an auction, I suppose. The money would’ve gone toward paying off the bills,” she quietly explained.

  The mental block began to crumble. The realization of what she was telling began to fully form. I didn’t want to think about it. I certainly didn’t want to hear about it.

  “EmLynn, Phillip paid off your father’s medical bills. He paid off every last penny.”

  I shook my head. “Dad would have hated that!”

  “What your dad would’ve hated was to see that car go to someone else. Phillip paid off those bills for you.”

  “I never asked him to do that!”

  “Of course you didn’t,” she agreed, “because you are simply too stubborn to ask for anything. He asked me not to tell you. I agreed. But I’ve changed my mind. I thought you would warm up to him by now. But you still treat him like he’s the bad guy.” She pulled in a breath. “He’s not. If you need to blame someone for your father and I getting a divorce, blame me.”

  “I do,” I assured her.

  I scoffed as I wiped an angry tear away. I felt gutted. I felt guilty. My father truly would’ve hated that Phillip, of all people, paid his medical bills. It would’ve made him feel like a charity case. And who wants charity from the man that stole your wife away?

  Just when my antagonistic feelings toward Phillip had started to fade, I felt them come back full force. Mom’s guilt trip had backfired. It felt like an affront to my dad.

  “How much was it?” I had an idea. It was more than thousands, maybe tens of thousands? It couldn’t be in the hundreds of thousands could it? Years of ongoing medical care, I knew it had added up but I’d had no idea it was so bad.

  “I’ll pay Phillip back,” I sniffled.

  “Don’t be ridiculous,” she said gently.

  “Not now, I mean, I know I don’t have that kind of money now. But later, after college, when I get a job…” I let the words fade away. But I meant them.

  “Phillip wouldn’t take your money,” she said firmly.

  “And Dad wouldn’t have taken his!”

  “You don’t know that,” Mom said.

  “Are you kidding me?! Of course I do!” I clamped my teeth down on my bottom lip. Thinking about Dad always made me emotional. Thinking about his illness, Mom leaving us to deal with it on our own, I wasn’t sure if it would ever stop being a painful topic.

  “Sweetheart, don’t twist this into something negative,” Mom said as she stood.

  I raked my hands through my hair. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. I don’t like talking about Dad with you.”

  “All right then,” she said with a sigh as she headed for the door. She stopped before letting herself out. “Lunch will be ready in half an hour. I want you to join us.”

  “I’m not hungry,” I said.

  “I expect you to put in an appearance, regardless. For the girls.”

  I didn’t respond and she let herself out.

  * * *

  That night I awoke to Roscoe growling. Roscoe never growled. It was a frightening, garbled sound. It jolted me awake as my heart pounded in my chest. A sizzle of fear immediately coursed through my body. I pulled the covers a little tighter around myself and then stayed perfectly still.

  I’d gone up to the house for lunch but after that, I’d sequestered myself. I hadn’t responded to Clara’s texts and when Eric called, he knew something was off. I’d gone to bed earlier than normal, to my surprise, in my sulky state I’d fallen asleep fairly easily.

  Roscoe let out a sound that wasn’t quite a yip as he hurriedly shuffled over to my bedroom window. With some effort he launched himself onto his hind legs. His front paws landed against the window sill. His tail began to wag with so much force his body swayed along with it.

  I already knew he was the world’s worst watchdog. As I heard him begin to whimper excitedly, I figured there was no way someone malicious was outside of the window. Roscoe couldn’t be that gullible, could he?

  My thought was followed by the distinct sound of fingers tapping out a rhythmic beat against the glass. The sound only intensified Roscoe’s excitement. He began to paw at the window.

  I scrambled out of bed. The yard light crept through the cracks in my curtain, allowing enough light for me to make my way over to the window without tripping over anything. I carefully peeked through the small gap between the window and the blinds.

  Eric.

  My heart took off in a chaotic beat for an entirely different reason this time. I pulled the curtain aside. He motioned toward my front door. I nodded in understanding.

  I carefully made my way through my bedroom, through the living room to the front door. I didn’t want to turn a light on. I doubted very much that Mom or Phillip would be up, but didn’t see any point in taking the chance.

  I flipped the lock and pulled the door open. The cool night air rushed past me.

  “What are you doing here?” I whispered.

  “I came to see you,” he whispered back. Then he added, “Why are you whispering?”

  I reached out, latched onto his arm, and pulled him inside. As soon as the door was closed, in a normal voice I said, “I get that you came to see me, but why? Do Lisa and Tim know where you are?”

  He shook his head. “No. I didn’t think they’d exactly give permission. So I didn’t ask. But I couldn’t get to sleep. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. You seemed so upset today, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

  “Yeah…I’m fine.” I giggled quietly. It was a nervous giggle. I’d never had a boy sneak into my house before.

  Was this the kind of thing that boys that grew up without curfews did?

  Maybe I should’ve been irritated that he’d just shown up. I’d only known him for a few weeks.

  The opposite was true. I was happy to see him.

  “I can’t believe you came all the way over here!” I crossed my arms over my chest, realizing only now that I was wearing a skimpy cami and boy shorts. I should’ve grabbed a bathrobe but my mind hadn’t been fully functioning yet. “What time is it?”

  “A little after one.” I could hear the grin in his voice.

  I smacked his arm. It was chilled. “You are so lucky that Phillip didn’t hear you drive up!”

  “Give me some credit!” he said with a laugh. “I parked about a block away. I walked up here. Now that I’m here, are you going to tell me what was bother
ing you?”

  “Um, well, it’s kind of a long story.” I really didn’t want to get into it standing in the dark in my entryway.

  “Good thing I’ve got all night,” he said lightly.

  I had a quick mental debate: Drag him over to the couch and freeze, or drag him back to my room so I could crawl back into my warm, cozy bed.

  “Kick your shoes off and stay awhile then,” I teased back.

  He did as ordered and I took his hand. I wove our way around the furniture in my living room. I threw my covers back and bounced across my bed.

  “Is this okay?” I asked. “I’m cold.”

  “You’re asking if I mind? No, I don’t mind at all,” he said with a laugh. The bed dipped and he slid in beside me.

  For one brief moment I wondered what I thought I was doing. I pushed the thought away because really, I wasn’t doing anything wrong. Well, maybe kind of wrong. Mom had never told me I couldn’t have boys in the pool house. That was probably supposed to be a given but I was going to pretend the thought never crossed my mind.

  Eric’s arms slid around me and even though his skin was icy from his walk up to the house, it still felt heavenly. I shifted around until I was lying comfortably with my head on his shoulder.

  “So talk to me,” he said.

  “About what?”

  “Don’t act like you don’t know. You sounded really upset on the phone. You promised that it wasn’t because of me. So that’s good to know. But something was obviously wrong, you’re usually so happy. It was bothering me all day. I couldn’t sleep. So what is it?” he demanded.

  I was still trying to deal with the shock I felt at having him show up.

  “Oh, you know, family stuff,” I started.

  “Yeah, families can be a hassle,” he agreed.

  “You’re going to think it’s dumb,” I warned.

  “I doubt it, but try me.”

  I told him about the conversation with my mom.

  “It’s not just that he paid my dad’s bills, it’s more than that,” I said as I tried to explain myself. “I’ve never really felt like part of this family. And yeah, I know, I’m partly at fault for that. I’ve got some anger issues and I’m having a hard time letting them go. Just when I thought maybe I could move past it, I find out that he did this.”