Pursued

by Kristin Vayden

  Her eyes twinkled, and I shrugged and smiled. At least Samantha had a project and was enjoying herself. I knew nothing would come of it. Who would want someone like me when they could choose from hundreds, or thousands, of untouched, beautiful, Christian women in our own town? I was all right with the idea, resigned myself to hoping in God rather than in a relationship. It would work out, somehow it would.

  Chapter Eight

  The phone ringing pulled me from my dream. I rolled over lazily and encountered a stack of towels that fell over on top of me. Contentment gone, I pulled them off me and reached for the cordless phone.

  “Hello?” My voice was raspy and thick from sleep. What time was it?

  “Honey! What are you doin’ sleeping in the middle of the day? Are you sick? Please tell me you’re not sick…”

  Middle of the day? I looked around and noticed the bright sunshine outside. I vaguely remembered folding clothes and yawning before sitting down beside the towels I had just folded. I must have fallen asleep. It didn’t surprise me. I had been up almost all night with Chase. This single parenting thing was not for the faint of heart.

  “Sorry, I didn’t get much sleep last night, Samantha. What’s up?”

  “Well, wake up because you’re coming over here in about an hour. Did you wash your hair?”

  “What? Why am I coming over, not that I object, but why in creation does it matter if I washed my hair or not?” I pulled on the end of my messy ponytail and looked with suspicion at it, knowing it wasn’t that clean.

  “Because you’re going to meet Levi today!”

  “Excuse me?” My heart stopped. Wasn’t he running for the hills or something like that?

  “Levi! He came up to me this morning and told me he’d been in prayer and wanted to go ahead and meet you. I told him you’d be here this afternoon. I would have called you sooner, but I knew you’d just work yourself up into a tizzy, and I didn’t want you to worry longer than necessary.”

  “Okay, so. Wait. You told him I’m coming over, when exactly?”

  “In about an hour and a half.”

  I glanced at myself in the mirror, and it was not promising. I said a quick bye and tossed the phone onto the messed up towels and ran to the bathroom. I had an hour before we needed to leave, and I need to make the most of that time. This morning I had not expected to go anywhere, and so I hadn’t showered or put on any make-up. Who was there to impress anyway? With ruthless abandon I washed my hair and body, decided against shaving because it was winter, and it’s not like he’d be checking out my legs anyway.

  I tripped getting out of the shower and landed on my shin. The pain was intense, and the spot was already bruising. I gritted my teeth and ran a brush through my long, blonde hair without mercy. After I wrapped the towel around my head, I began to apply my make-up. No, I wasn’t about to try and erase every imperfection. For once I wanted someone to love me for what I was, not what I could manage to erase. That decided, I applied a bit of concealer, a touch of blush, a swipe of mascara, and Chapstick. I nodded with approval in the mirror and tossed my head down to take off my towel.

  Once my hair was dried and tamed into gentle curls I walked to the closet. What did I wear? I was going to Samantha and Frank’s dairy, so I needed boots. That being decided, I pulled them out. And jeans, and a coat, so really whatever I wore under my coat didn’t matter because he’d probably never see it anyway. The long, black sweater called my name and I put a grey cami under it. The mirror in the bathroom attested that I was ready, but I knew my heart wasn’t. Fifteen minutes. The house was quiet, as Chase and Javan were still asleep, and I walked into the living room and dropped to my knees.

  Father, I only want this if you do. I don’t know what I’m doing, but you do, so show me. Amen.

  Javan was stirring, and so I grabbed him and helped him get his coat and shoes on. By then Chase was awake, and I bundled him up as well. With two minutes to spare, we headed to the car and began the drive to Samantha’s. My tension increased with each mile that passed. What was I doing? Was I ready for this? It didn’t matter, I was going and that was settled. Everything was in God’s hands, and I tried to resist the temptation to worry.

  I pulled into Samantha’s driveway and immediately noticed a man speaking with Frank on their porch. That must be Levi. I wanted to study him, but I chose to get Javan from his car seat instead. He ran across the gravel and into the house with a barely discernible “hi” to Samantha, who had just came out the front door. She ruffled his head, and I turned to pick up Chase. The little, chubby boy giggled as I pulled him out, and I tucked his head under my chin as he sucked on his two middle fingers. Here goes nothing.

  What I noticed first about Levi was his eyes. They were a clear and crisp shade of sky-blue that seemed to twinkle. The lines around them were lifted in a welcoming smile, and I was able to take a deeper breath because some of my nerves dissipated. He was tall, almost a foot taller than my five-foot-four-inch frame. He stood casually with his hands halfway in his pockets, and I could tell by his stature that he was used to hard labor. The bulk of his work coat couldn’t hide his powerful build. He offered me his hand, and I shifted Chase so that I could shake it.

  “Hello there, I’m Levi Jensen.” His hand was warm as his fingers grasped mine with a firm yet gentle hold.

  “Hi, I’m Abigail Wains.”

  His eyes were warm and drew me in immediately. After a moment he released my hand, and I turned to Frank and Samantha, who stood there grinning like fools, watching us. I glanced down in embarrassment, and my cheeks heated with a blush. Levi coughed, eyeing Frank, and then turned to me.

  “It’s a beautiful day, would you mind going for a walk with me?”

  “Sure.” I offered him a smile, and Samantha reached over to grab Chase from my arms. He had kept his eyes trained on Levi’s face, and even when Samantha stepped back, he had twisted his little body so he could still watch.

  Levi stepped off the porch and reached out his hand to me. I eyed it curiously. Did he think I was going to hold his hand?

  “The way I was raised, a gentleman always assists a lady, even when she may not need it.” His eyes twinkled as if holding back a grin.

  I smiled in response and took his offered hand. He released me as soon as my boot hit dirt and then waited for me to walk beside him.

  After we had walked a few steps, I glanced back and saw Samantha and Frank staring out the window, watching us with rapt attention.

  “We have an audience.”

  “I’m sure we do, that’s why I suggested a walk. At least this way I can speak with you and not worry about Samantha either answering questions for you or getting after me if I don’t ask the right ones.” He chuckled to himself.

  We were silent for a moment as we continued along on the dirt road, but it was not awkward. I glanced over at him and saw him watching me; he smiled unapologetically and cleared his throat.

  “What are your sons’ names?”

  “Chase and Javan. Chase is about eight months old, and Javan is going to be three this summer.”

  I couldn’t help the grin that spread across my face. He had picked my favorite topic, my boys.

  “They’re really cute little fellas. I didn’t get a good look at the older one, Javan right?” At my nod, he continued. “He ran past me so fast all I saw was a blur.”

  “He and Michael are good friends. It made his day to come out here today.”

  “So, at the risk of being too forward, do you mind if I ask you some personal questions?”

  Goodbye Levi, nice to have met you.

  “Of course, please do.” And I meant it. He seemed like a really great guy, and for the life of me, I didn’t understand why he wasn’t already married. He was handsome and clearly knew how to be a gentleman. The least I could do was be honest with him. I had nothing to hide.

  “Where did you grow up?”

  Not what I was expecting.

  “Here, actually. I moved away to Florid
a for school but returned before I graduated.”

  “Do you like it here?”

  His deep voice sent shivers through my body. The effect was disconcerting, and I didn’t know how to respond.

  “Yes, all of my family is here.”

  “So your family is pretty important to you.”

  He stated the words rather than asked them. I nodded and looked ahead, staring at the cows in the pen, mooing at us as we passed.

  “What about you? Where are you from?” I asked after a moment.

  “Oh, here and there. I moved here with my folks when I was about sixteen, and before that, we moved around a lot. I’ve lived here longer than anywhere else. The rugged beauty was different than what I was used to, and it took me a while to get accustomed to the weather but I really like it now. I don’t think I’d ever want to leave, but that’s in God’s hands, not mine.”

  I watched him carefully as he spoke. His words rang with honesty, but I had been fooled before and I wasn’t about to let it happen again. A moment passed with silence, and he glanced down and then at me, grinning.

  Quickly, I glanced away.

  “So, what do you enjoy? If you have free time, which I doubt you have often…” He chortled and nodded his head back toward the house.

  My lips curled in a smile. Yeah, free time was nonexistent right now.

  “Ha, yeah free time, what is that again? Care to remind me?” I teased, surprised at my own response.

  He chuckled and waited for me to continue.

  “Read, I love to read.” I closed my eyes in blissful rapture as I considered holding a steaming latte, sitting on a comfortable couch, and firing up my e-reader, all the while losing myself in some adventure story. I had sworn off romances, since they tended to depress me, and had found westerns to be captivating. The longing expression on my face made him cough to cover up his laugh. I turned and offered him a mock glare.

  “Sorry, you just looked so wistful. Penny for your thoughts.”

  “My thoughts are much more expensive.”

  His eyebrows rose as if waiting for my price.

  “Double or nothing.” I flirted. Immediately I was embarrassed and shocked. I didn’t even know this man, why was I flirting already? Yet a part of me was thrilled that I even remembered how.

  To my delight, he stopped and dug into his jeans and pulled out two shiny copper pennies. He reached down and pulled up my hand, placing the warm change in my palm. His hands were rough and callused but warm, and I shivered. The swirling sensation of attraction was uncomfortable and, for a moment, I felt like I was betraying Jack. Levi must have sensed my mood shift and offered me a polite smile and held out his hand for us to continue walking.

  Chapter Nine

  “How did it go?” Samantha called me as soon as I had pulled out of their driveway. I pushed the speaker button.

  “Isn’t patience a virtue? What kind of example are you setting for those children of yours?” I teased, hoping to give myself a bit longer to think.

  “I am patient! You walked for over an hour! You’re lucky I didn’t corner you the moment you walked through the door!”

  She was right. I was lucky.

  “So?”

  “So what?” I shouldn’t be so mean to my wonderful friend, but it was just too much fun.

  “I’m going to hunt you down…”

  “Fine, fine… it went fine.”

  “Fine? That’s all you have to say for yourself? I give you the perfect man on a plate, and you say ‘fine’?”

  The phone was silent, and I bit my lip as I turned onto the main road.

  “Okay, well. Samantha, the thing is, I don’t know if I’m ready. It has nothing to do with him. He was the perfect gentleman, made me laugh, and I enjoyed talking with him but…” I closed my eyes for a moment before turning my attention back to the road.

  “But…” Samantha calmly reminded me.

  “But I felt like I was betraying Jack. I know, I know, that’s crazy but it, well. Maybe it’s just too soon for me. Maybe I’m not as healed as I thought.” My voice trailed off as I considered my own state of mind.

  “Sweetheart, I understand. I’m sorry if I pushed you into something you weren’t ready for.”

  “No, Samantha, don’t worry about that. It’s me, all on me, okay?”

  “Honey when are you going to realize that you shouldering the guilt for everything will never fix anything? That’s Jack’s training, not God’s.”

  She was right. It’s amazing how much one person can mess up another.

  “Just do me a favor, okay, honey?” Samantha asked.

  “Of course.”

  “Pray about this, and if it’s God shutting the door, then we praise him for an answer. But if it’s fear… don’t lose this chance. All right?”

  “All right. Thanks, Samantha.”

  “You’re welcome. Oh! I almost forgot!”

  “Yes?”

  “He asked me for your number, something about forgetting to ask you and well, what should I say?”

  The dilemma made me pause. It’s not that I didn’t like him. If I were being honest, the problem was that I liked him too much, too quickly, and I didn’t trust myself. But I needed time to think, time to pray.

  “For right now, Samantha, just don’t give it, is that okay?”

  “Of course, honey. Of course. Drive safe! We love you.”

  “Love you guys too. Thanks, Samantha. Bye.”

  “Bye.”

  ****

  When I got home my answering machine was blinking red, and my cell had seven missed calls, all from my family. How everyone knew was a mystery. It had to be my sister’s fault. She was the only one I spoke with even mentioning meeting Levi today. She would pay, dearly. We ate and the boys played in the living room while I cleaned up. All the while the machine blinked, causing me to glance over at it every few minutes. My cell phone had begun to ring again shortly after dinner, and I knew I was on borrowed time till someone stopped by to make sure I was still alive and breathing. With a resigned sigh, I got the boys bathed and into bed. The door to Javan’s room clicked shut, and I heard a car pull into the driveway.

  As I passed the kitchen, I started the coffee pot and went to answer the gentle knock on the door.

  “Hi, Grandma.”

  “Honey! We were so worried! We’re all just dying to hear about your little visit and when you didn’t answer, why…” She trailed off and entered the room, my grandpa following close behind. I motioned for them to sit at the table.

  “Okay, spill.” My grandma nodded as she settled her little rump into the chair, wiggling to settle herself. My grandpa grinned like a schoolboy behind her. I held up my finger as I answered the phone. Mom.

  “Okay, mom, yes, they’re here. Okay. Hold on.”

  I placed the phone on speaker and put it in the middle of the table.

  “Okay, this will make it so I don’t have to repeat it a thousand times.”

  “This isn’t good.” My grandma loudly whispered to my grandpa, who nodded.

  “This isn’t good!” She shouted loudly as she leaned over the table toward my cell phone.

  I heard my mom let out a large sigh that buzzed over the cell speaker. I should be sainted for resisting the temptation to roll my eyes.

  “No, it’s not bad, mom, grandma, grandpa. It was fine. He’s a great guy, but I don’t think it’s going to turn into anything exciting. Sorry, guys.” A collective sigh escaped my family.

  “Why not, honey?” Mom said. The question hung in the air, and I took a deep breath.

  “Because I don’t know if I’m just too terrified of making the same mistake twice or if God’s saying no because I’m not ready.”

  “I see.” My grandma nodded.

  “We’ll pray,” Mom said.

  “I need it guys. I need it.” After a pause, my mom chimed back in. “Okay, I’m going to hang up now and call your sister and cousin. My own phone has been burning up with the texts from the
m. Love you baby. It’ll all work out in God’s time. Don’t worry.”

  Easier said than done.

  “Love you too, Mom, bye.”

  The phone clicked, and I glanced at my grandparents.

  “Honey, I can understand your hesitation. If you didn’t hesitate I’d be concerned. We’ll be praying too.” She took a sip of her coffee. “I’m assuming my darling great grandbabies are in bed?”

  “Yeah, sorry.” I reached across the table and patted her wrinkled yet perfectly manicured hand.

  “Not a worry, it just gives us an excuse to come back tomorrow!” She spoke cheerily. “Come along, Papa.”

  She helped my gentle grandfather out the door as she blew me kisses. His walker jingled with little trinkets some of the great grandkids had given him.

  I smiled as they left, thankful to be so loved. Even though I was a single mom now, sometimes alone wasn’t really alone. Not when you had family.

  Chapter Ten

  My cell phone rang, and I almost answered it without looking. It was about the time my sister would call to check in with me and talk about our respective days. The phone number was one I didn’t recognize, but rather than tossing it back on the counter I answered it.

  “Hello?”

  “Hi, Abby?” A rich masculine voice greeted me.

  “Yes?” I responded, and then cleared my throat quietly. Get a grip!

  “This is Levi Jensen. I met you over at Frank’s?”

  I paused. Hadn’t I told Samantha not to give out my number? How did he get it? It’s not as if I was unlisted, yet he had called my cell, not landline. Meaning, someone I knew had given it to him. For a moment I debated on what to do, but if he was that determined to contact me, the least I could do was hear him out.

  “Yes. Hi, Levi, how are you?” I asked casually, curious. Walking over to the window I glanced out at the backyard and waited.

  “I’m really doing well, thanks for asking. How about yourself?”