by J. Kearston
What sort of hell did her parents put her through growing up? Was it all emotional abuse, or does she have the physical scars to match? I tried to be a gentleman when she changed in front of us, but I should have looked at her back to check for scars. If I know what she went through, I can act accordingly.
Before I know it, it’s been another half hour and I’m still staring at the same page I started with. I sigh, shutting down the computer and getting up. I’m not going to be able to get anything accomplished at this rate.
“Belinda, I’m going out. You can forward calls to my cell.”
She nods and doesn’t pry, letting me leave without an interrogation. I get in my car and drive towards Atlas’ job site before I even know I meant to, getting out and leaning my hip against the hood.
From here, I can see Cambria’s vivid splash of hair clearly on the first floor through the freshly installed window, flitting around like a hummingbird. She’s hanging drywall, getting everything set and installed, not even aware of how many eyes are on her. She stays focused on her work, giving it her all, and I grind my teeth at the accusations the fae were spewing.
Atlas walks into the room and his entire face lights up, coming over to help her while tossing glares over his shoulders at the other guys in the room. Before I know it, they’ve finished and are coming back outside, nearly an hour passing with me accomplishing nothing more than studying them.
“Lucien!” she shouts when she catches sight of me, bounding over and sitting her dusty ass on the hood of my car without remorse. “What are you doing here?”
A smile twitches at the corner of my lips as I look down at her before reaching over to swipe some of the dirt from her cheek. “Thought I’d treat you two to lunch. We can pick up Dorian and make it a family affair.”
Cambria’s eyes flash for a moment, but the look is gone before I can decipher it. “Sure, but lunch is on me this time. You guys covered groceries, so it’s the least I can do.”
I don’t argue with her, because honestly, she wouldn’t offer otherwise. Cambria is many things, but unnecessarily benevolent isn’t one of them. A thief? Sure. Shameless? Absolutely. She has no qualms letting others foot the tab, so if she’s offering, it must be because she wants to.
We make it to Dorian’s place in only a few minutes. “I’ll see if he’s free,” Cambria offers while sliding out of the car, walking into Dorian’s shop.
Atlas scoffs. “She really doesn’t see it, does she?”
I smirk. “No, I think she does, but enjoys toying with us.”
Atlas huffs his agreement. “After the way she grew up, no wonder she likes ‘slumming it’ with us humans compared to the rest of the fae. But even if people fawn over her at the club, it’s not like they know who she is.”
“So us getting to know her and still wanting to spend time with her must be a novelty. I can’t fault her for enjoying it.”
Atlas’ attention is rapt on Cambria as she shoos out the lone customer while Dorian locks up, perfectly happy to kick the man out and spend time with our resident fae instead. “If she wants to play her games, let her. A little flirting never killed anyone.”
“I’m still not sure how you can expect this not to end poorly,” I warn, but Atlas just waves me off.
“For once in your life, enjoy something without trying to ruin it first, will ‘ya?”
The door opens and the two slide into the back. “Playing hooky today?” Dorian asks me with a grin.
I pin him with a look through the rearview that he actively ignores, turning his attention back to Cambria instead. “I’m surprised Luce let you in his nice car covered in drywall dust.”
She shrugs. “Yeah, he didn’t really think that one through, poor guy.”
Rolling my eyes, I park and the four of us head into the chain restaurant while Atlas and Dorian keep the conversation light. After yesterday, she could use a little levity. When Dorian has particularly bad nightmares or reactions when we’re out, it can be days or weeks before he chases away his demons enough to get back to his normal demeanor. While Cambria acts alright, she seems more subdued than usual. It’s likely why Atlas refrained from talking about himself in depth; there is only so much darkness one person can handle before it won’t let them go, and Cambria looked to be at her limit.
The waitress leads us to a booth in a back corner and Atlas slides in beside Cambria. “You’ve been hogging her all day,” Dorian grumbles, making her smile.
“Now, now boys, don’t fight. There’s plenty of me to go around,” she teases, imbuing false confidence into her voice.
She looks better when she does, like she’s bolstering up her defenses. No one was there to praise her growing up, so she’s defaulted to singing her own so that she can hear the words. If you hear something enough, you eventually start to believe it, so she’s channeled that into complimenting herself in a bid to feel more confident.
The waitress gives her a look, rolling her eyes, and my jaw tenses. So help me, if this woman says anything, I will buy this place just to fire her. She takes our order and flits off, all the while eyeing Atlas hungrily.
“Luce?” Cambria asks, and it shouldn’t please me as much as it does that she’s adopted using the nickname.
“Hmm?”
“I was asking what you thought about Atlas’ idea,” she prompts. “About him not renewing the lease on his apartment.”
I nod, pulling myself out of my thoughts and back into the conversation. “Logically and financially it makes the most sense. I have a few extra rooms, so we can make it work. This way we can also redirect the funds to getting a bigger apartment when we travel,” I selectively state in case there are any prying ears, “instead of your studio.”
She sighs, but I have to wait to understand what I said wrong as the waitress brings out our drinks. Cambria’s eyes narrow on the napkin that was delivered with Atlas’, and I can’t help but be intrigued, studying her to see how she’ll react.
She’s said time and time again that we’re free to make our own decisions, and here, where there are no fae to compel us, I wonder if she’ll come up with a new excuse. I thought Dorian’s idea of all of us getting involved with her was the quickest way to set fire to an already strained situation, but I can’t deny my growing intrigue.
No matter the way the other two hit on her, it doesn’t bother me like it should. When she flirts back and their eyes light up, it just makes me relieved to see my friends’ joy after all they’ve been through; they deserve it. We’re already all forced to live together when at her home, and it looks like Atlas will soon be moving in with me as well. At this point, Dorian may as well too so that we don’t need to drive back and forth so much when Cambria goes with each of us.
I’ve never gotten seriously involved with someone because I was well aware I didn’t have enough time to give a woman. I work far too much to give someone the attention they deserve and require, and it would inevitably lead to heartache and disappointment. But that wouldn’t be an issue where Cambria’s involved. Would it be worth the risk? If we attempted it and failed, we are all bound together because of these infernal marks. It could be pouring gasoline on a fire without any ability to abandon the building.
But what if it isn’t?
What if I actually admitted to myself that I’m just scared to try? And when in my life have I ever allowed myself to be afraid of anything?
“Is moving more of a complex issue on your end?” I ask, cutting off my train of thought before I zone out again as our food is delivered.
Cambria pops a fry into her mouth before answering, giving herself some time to consider her answer. “Not any more so than it is here. Money and lease, but Ted will gladly let me out of it early to get rid of me. It’s just the end of an era. That place was the first thing that was officially mine, so it just makes me a little nostalgic is all.”
Her eyes flick back to Atlas’ face, trying to search for a reaction from the corner of her eye. To his credit, I don’t
think he’s even noticed it yet. He’s so caught up either eating or talking, I’m pretty sure he’s oblivious. My lip twitches as I fight a smile, watching her irritation grow while we eat as she fights the desire to say something.
“Then when we return, we’ll start shopping around for a new place,” I decide, and everyone nods or murmurs in agreement.
“And I can rent out the apartment above my shop for some extra income too and just move in at the same time as Atlas. No point in me being the odd man out at the party,” Dorian adds. “I’ll just change the lock to the back stairwell so they can’t get into the shop.”
I nod my agreement, already assuming it was going to play out this way. It’s been an odd adjustment not having Dorian live with me these last several years anyway and I’ve hated the distance that’s come with it. I latched onto him to get through my grief of losing my younger brother, but I’ve never thought of him as a replacement, not that he sees that. Dorian is Dorian, a far cry different from Maddox. Just as you love each sibling in their own way, yet not more than another. Just different.
Him striking out on his own made me immensely proud and happy for him, but at the same time it was a final nail in my coffin, leaving me alone. As much as it pains me to admit it, I think that’s part of the reason I struggle so much with Cambria. Everyone I care about eventually leaves and I’m stuck alone with nothing but my work to keep me company. I’m better off not getting close to anyone if they are just going to leave, but thanks to these marks?
It’s a failsafe to never be alone again, and I’m not sure if I hate them, or hate that I want what they’re offering.
“Well, we better get back to work before the boss has our hides,” Atlas declares, wiping his hands off on his napkin, balling it up, and tossing it on his plate without ever once acknowledging it.
“Why do you call Luce ‘boss’ if you don’t work at the office?” Cambria looks torn between being pleased, and wanting to point it out to make sure he saw it so she can gauge his reaction.
Dorian snorts, climbing out of the booth with me while Cambria starts pulling out cash to pay. She leaves mostly singles, and the waitress’ eyebrow raises as she makes her own assumptions about our party.
“That’s a story for a different day,” Atlas dismisses, climbing to his feet.
Cambria winks at me when she sees me shooting looks between the waitress and her. I finally see that she was well aware the entire time and is just playing into it rather than get upset. She counts out a generous tip in singles and hands it to the woman personally, looking at her with open gratitude.
“Thank you so very much, the meal was delicious. And you went above and beyond to make our experience a pleasant one. Have a fantastic day.” Cambria grips her hand in both of hers and offers a wide smile before taking both Atlas’ and Dorian’s hands, following me out.
When we get to the car, Atlas gives her a strange look. “What was all that about?”
Cambria bites the inside of her cheek before speaking. “Because I acknowledge stuff like that is going to happen and eventually turn into something else, so I need to get used to being friendly.”
Atlas just stares at her lost and I finally can’t take it anymore. “The waitress slipped you her number and Cambria figures she’s going to wake up to the awkward morning after with a girl in the house if we’re all living together. She’s just obviously not used to faking being nice.”
“Hey!” she argues before grimacing. “Yeah, actually that’s pretty spot on. I’m not good at faking it when it comes to other people.”
Dorian winks at her. “Good to know.”
She laughs as we climb into the car and Atlas turns around in the passenger seat to face her. “I thought we already covered this?”
She shrugs. “You said it’d be pretty shitty to bang a fae chick in my one room apartment. But over here, where I know the fae aren’t taking advantage of you and we all have our own bedrooms?”
I continuously flick my eyes to the rearview mirror, gauging her reactions and trying to interpret the things that she isn’t saying.
Atlas’ tone softens. “Nah, once you go fae, you can’t go back.”
Her cheeks tint as she holds his gaze, refusing to look away despite her embarrassment. She opens her mouth to speak, and something possesses me to cut her off before she can, as if I don’t want to hear her rejection.
“Let’s stop trying to draw such harsh boundaries and see what happens, shall we? We should focus on getting all of the living arrangements worked out and organized. Dorian, why don’t you escort Cambria to work tonight while Atlas and I start moving his stuff over?”
Dorian’s eyes light up. “Ditch moving to go to a club? Don’t need to ask me twice.”
Chapter 11
Dorian
“What do you mean, fired?” Cambria seethes, going toe to toe with her boss, despite the fact her head only reaches his shoulders.
He’s tall and slender with slicked back hair that screams ‘shady car salesman’, and clad in simple jeans with a white t-shirt. If she hadn't addressed him as such, I never would have imagined this douchebag owned his own car, let alone the whole club.
“You’re usually flighty, but these past weeks have been the last straw, Ria,” he reiterates. “You’re done. I put up with enough of your shit as it is, but I can’t have someone I can’t get ahold of either.”
“I told you, my phone broke,” she says through gritted teeth. “And Stella agreed to cover for me if there was a problem until I buy a new one next pay day.”
But the man has already dismissed her, grabbing his drink from Cy at the bar. The bartender looks at Cambria with pity, but doesn’t linger.
“You’re a pretty girl; I’m sure you can find someone to shack up with while you figure things out,” he tosses out without looking at her.
“You want me to whore myself out instead of working?” she snaps, fists balled in anger, and I’m not faring much better. “Do you even hear yourself?”
He finally turns to look at her over the rim of his glass. “Looks like you already are.” His eyes flick to me. “Between this one and the other two that have been hanging around while you’re on the clock, it looks to me you’ve already figured out what you’re good for.”
And that’s how the two of us ended up arrested.
While we wait for Lucien or Atlas to bail us out, Cambria and I sit in the holding tank. She has one knee drawn up on the bench while she lays stretched out on her back, the other leg swinging and dragging on the dirty cement. Her head rests on my lap as I run my fingers through her silky hair, letting the hummingbird colored strands slide across my skin. Even her hair is otherworldly, softer than anything I could imagine.
“I just couldn’t even have that one thing,” she laments. “It was the one thing I actually enjoyed and looked forward to in my life.”
I say nothing, letting her vent her frustrations while offering comfort.
“It was the perfect place to forget,” she sighs, closing her eyes. “The music was so loud I couldn’t hear myself think, let alone feel anything that wasn’t an emotion provoked by the rhythm. It was chaos of the best variety, made to take over your life completely. Mind, body, and soul; it belonged to the bass.” Her eyelashes flutter open, her swirling silver eyes trained on me with open vulnerability. “What am I supposed to do now to keep the nightmares at bay?”
Bending down awkwardly, I place a gentle kiss on her forehead before continuing my ministrations. “We’ll figure it out. Lucien is a pro by now at dealing with my freak outs.” I huff out a humorless laugh, more of a harsh breath than anything. “But it’ll be okay. We’ve survived worse, haven’t we, angel?”
She gives me a sad smile, her eyes fluttering shut again and leaning into my touch. I falter for a moment when a thought occurs to me before picking up where I left off. I don’t voice it though, not only because it would be an asshole thing to ask, but I don’t want to cause this broken angel any more pain than she�
��s already had to face.
I can piece things together pretty well on my own because I know the signs, especially now that I know to look for them. I’m replaying every one of our interactions with the new information in mind; the way she woke up after getting her marks and reaction to Lucien’s cold voice, flinching. The harsh sarcasm she wears as a shield; all of it.
If she killed her brother when she was a little kid, abused for sure emotionally and I’d bet my money it went farther than that just based off of the fae we’ve seen so far, then she wouldn’t have had something like this. Something as simple as someone running their fingers through her hair.
Even if she slept around with humans, she couldn’t tell them who she was. She couldn’t let her guard down or let them look beyond the persona she showed them. I had Luce and Atlas, but she had no one. I clench my jaw, looking down at her serene expression as she offers me a level of trust she likely hasn’t shown to anyone else in her life.
I don’t think she even cares how much blood I’ve gotten in her hair from my knuckles after I beat the shit out of her boss.
“Lark, Grey, you’ve made bail,” the female officer barks, unlocking the door to our cell.
Cambria’s eyes fly open and her lips curve with her humor. “Dorian Grey? Seriously?”
I flick her nose and stand up, helping her to her feet. “Don’t be a dick. I didn’t pick it, my parents did.”
She snorts, but doesn’t say anything else as the officer leads us to the front of the police station, a scowling Lucien for once in normal clothes due to moving, glaring daggers at us. Atlas on the other hand, notes my swollen, bloody knuckles and smirks with approval. That is, until he also sees the blood still flecked across Cambria and streaked through her hair, his face hardening with concern and promising murder.
“What the fuck happened?” Atlas demands, crossing the room in a few strides and settling his hands on Cambria’s shoulders.
