Close to Home

by Liz Lee

  She’d been innocent, agreed to be his friend. She didn’t know he’d planned on never coming back. She didn’t know what he saw in his head every time he closed his eyes. She didn’t know he felt like a man barely hanging on to sanity half the time.

  She’d seen the man she’d always had a crush on. He’d looked in her eyes and found a certain sort of peace, and God, when he’d touched his lips to hers, he’d touched heaven.

  And with that taste of heaven, they’d created a baby.

  Damn if she was going to do this alone. And maybe, just maybe, she could erase the scenes and scents of death and destruction he couldn't escape on his own.

  Taking a deep breath, Donovan reached out, and for the first time, knocked on her door. When he’d touched Kacie Jo, it had felt like coming home. When he’d slid inside her, everything seemed to make sense. When he’d held her, he’d found a sense of eternal rightness.

  But knocking on her door felt out of place.

  When she didn’t answer, he knocked again.

  Eliza said she was here watching movies and eating spaghetti. Obviously talking to him was not on her agenda. Well, too damn bad.

  He knocked again and leaned in close to the door, hoped she was listening. “Kacie Jo, open the door. We’ve got to talk about this. You can’t just avoid me forever.”

  No answer.

  Taking a deep breath he continued. “I’m not going anywhere. You can stay behind this door only so long. Caldale isn’t big enough for you to avoid me, and I know everything. Come on, open the door. Let’s not have this conversation in front of God and everybody.”

  Still no answer.

  In a way he couldn’t blame her, but dammit, they had to talk sometime.

  “Look, Kacie Jo, I know I’ve been a jerk. I know I left without saying goodbye, but my head wasn’t screwed on straight. It is now.”

  Hopefully, she was listening. Donovan closed his eyes and pictured her on the other side of the door. Pictured her golden brown hair sparkling in the setting sun, pictured her green eyes narrowed in anger or closed in passion.

  As he pictured her there on the other side of the door, he knew his words were true. He couldn’t stay with Grady, and Ike would probably kill him. He’d noticed the only motel in town had closed up shop.

  That left one place, at least until he could find another solution. The idea of stepping foot in his mother’s pink trailer left him nauseous.

  But he wasn’t about to leave town now. Wasn’t about to leave Kacie Jo the way his father had checked out on his mother. Wasn’t about to let his baby grow up the way he had.

  It had been a long time since he’d had a permanent address, but it looked like he did now. No matter how much Donovan hated this town and all it represented, Caldale was home again.

  When she heard the knock, Kacie Jo dropped her suitcase. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know who stood on the other side of the door.

  God, she wanted to see him. Wanted to listen to him tell her all the reasons he’d left and all the reasons she should let him in. But she couldn’t.

  She rested her cheek against the warm wood and listened to his voice, listened to him say he wasn’t leaving. She hoped he didn’t camp out on her doorstep all night.

  She brushed away a lone tear as Donovan listed reasons for her to open the door. “Come on, Kacie Jo. You know I’m more determined than you.”

  She wondered how he’d come to that false conclusion.

  “You can’t even imagine the number of nights I’ve lain awake waiting for a source to come out of a house or walk by. I once stayed awake forty-eight hours waiting to talk to the future king of B’en Ai.”

  She could only imagine.

  “I really don’t want to start asking questions about that night out here where the neighbors can hear, Kacie Jo. But if you leave me no choice…” He let his unspoken words linger in the air. How did he even know she was inside?

  When the phone started ringing, she thought about answering it, thought about letting him know he was right. That, yes, she was standing just inside the locked door, easily reachable, totally inaccessible.

  It would serve him right.

  But then she remembered the way his long hair blew in the wind, his small diamond earring winking in the moonlight, his muscular arms flexed as he oh so slowly lowered himself until he was deep inside her, and she knew she couldn’t take the chance. Her house was secure by Caldale standards, but she didn’t figure much could stand between a determined Donovan and something or someone he wanted.

  Behind her, the machine picked up, her greeting played, and her supposed best friend asked her to please answer the phone. Then Eliza said she was sorry she hadn’t told her the truth.

  Yeah right.

  A few seconds of silence passed and then Grady said if she didn’t pick up in a few seconds, he and Eliza were on their way over to make sure she was okay.

  Let them both worry. She wasn’t moving.

  Outside the door Donovan kicked a rock, or at least it sounded like a rock.

  Maybe she should open the door. Maybe they should just talk all this out now, get it over with so he could head on out to wherever, and she could get on with learning how to be a single mom.

  But she couldn’t do it. She, the girl who had dared to seduce the world famous Donovan Nelson, was afraid to open the door and face him now.

  And then he cleared his throat, started to say her name, coughed. After a few seconds he tried again. “Look, Kacie Jo, I understand you’re probably pretty pissed, and I understand.”

  He stopped, and she held her breath, waiting for him to continue. She made herself exhale when he finally did.

  “I don’t know what to say to make you open this door, and I guess I’ll just have to accept that you’re not going to do it right now. I want you to know I’m really not going anywhere this time. I’m in Caldale. And…”

  His voice broke again and Kacie Jo’s breath caught in her throat painfully as she realized he was crying.

  He started talking again. “And, Jesus, Kacie Jo, I want us to at least talk. I want to be a part of this baby’s life, and I think you owe me that.”

  Kacie Jo could tell he was walking away, giving her exactly what she wanted. So why was her heart breaking into a million pieces?

  She stared at her suitcase, at the blinking light on her answering machine, closed her eyes and replayed the image of Donovan in the park as he talked about interviewing a princess.

  She couldn’t run away from this, from him.

  No. It was time to do what she preached to her kids every day. Newton’s law of motion. Every action had a reaction. It was time to face the consequences for her actions. She’d set out to seduce Donovan Nelson and she’d succeeded. Now, she had to help him see why she didn’t need him in her life.

  Because Kacie Jo knew to the depths of her soul that the small town teacher she was had no business in the life of the superstar reporter known as Tex. He interviewed princesses and ate dinner with kings. He didn’t belong in Caldale, and he never had.

  She was Caldale through and through.

  The door behind Donovan opened slowly, and he came to a sudden stand still.

  When he turned to face Kacie Jo, he was struck again by how pretty she was. She’d probably die of mortification if he pointed out that her red shirt was buttoned wrong.

  Then he changed his mind. She wouldn’t die. She’d kick his ass if the first thing he did was criticize her dressing skills.

  For the first time since he’d walked up to her door, all the pieces of his life clicked back into place. He couldn’t stop the smile that slid over his face.

  Kacie Jo didn’t like that response. She crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow the way he’d taught her when she was still a kid. “Don’t you dare stand there smiling at me like I’m supposed to open my door and pretend this is some sort of reunion.”

  He tried to put the frown firmly back in place, but his lips refused t
o cooperate. “Come on, Kacie Jo.”

  She shook her head, and he decided he was wrong. Kacie Jo was definitely beautiful. “Don’t you dare ‘come on, Kacie Jo’ me.”

  He shrugged. “You going to invite me in?”

  She shook her head. “I was thinking about it. But I see I was demented. Speak your piece and then you can leave.”

  He’d see about that.

  “I can gauran-damn-tee you, you don’t want me to say what I’m thinking out here in the open.”

  He smiled at the two little ladies walking by, almost laughed when they recognized him and stopped in their tracks.

  “There’s nothing you can…” Kacie Jo stopped what she was about to say and her mouth opened. Color tinge her cheeks as she realized just what he was talking about. “You’re blackmailing me to let you in my house.”

  “Whatever it takes.” He’d learned a long time ago to use any means necessary to get what he wanted. He could always ask forgiveness later. Plus he was so damn relieved she’d opened the door. But when he stepped into her house, when he found himself sitting across from her, when she treated him like a mere acquaintance, he realized how very wrong he was.

  She sat as far away from him as she could, and he knew this would never work. “Come on, Kacie Jo.”

  She refused to give an inch. "This was a bad idea.”

  The minute she said the words his temper shot through the roof. “Good for you, Kacie Jo. Good. Maybe you should’ve thought about that before you walked into Grady’s hell bent on sleeping with me.”

  She didn’t even give him that. “As I recall, I changed my mind. You asked me to be your friend and I was. And then after we…”

  She stopped talking and he thought seriously about supplying her with the perfect word for what they’d done.

  Instead she continued. “I’m not going to say I’m sorry for what happened that night Donovan. I’m not. But you did leave. And I wasn’t expecting you back any time soon.”

  She was right. He had no right to be so angry. But he couldn’t help it. “Well, I’m back now, Kacie Jo. So your plans are going to have to change.”

  She shook her head, and he realized she honestly believed she could simply reject him and he’d walk out the door.

  He didn’t think about his actions, didn’t try to rationalize his thoughts, just acted.

  When his lips touched hers, a jolt of pure awareness thundered through him. For all her words about him leaving and her damn plans, they shared the same heat. She didn’t even put up a pretend fight, just gave in to the sensation the same way he did.

  He told himself to take this slow, to make it count. To show her why they could make this work, at least until the baby came.

  But her hand rested on his chest like it belonged there, and suddenly, all thoughts left his mind and everything centered on the sensation of her body pressed under his.

  He slowly reached his hand out and brushed it through her hair, memorized its texture. When he ran a finger down her cheek, it was in reverence to the incredible woman she’d become.

  When his hand slowly brushed against her chest, she gave into the sensations overcoming both of them.

  She couldn’t argue with this. Couldn’t deny that somehow this was perfect and beautiful and meant to be.

  He unbuttoned her shirt button by button, taking more time than necessary so he could watch her open response. Could watch her eyes close as his fingers brushed across exposed skin. Could listen to her surprised inhalation when he parted her shirt and touched her skin with his lips.

  How was it possible to want someone so much? He’d heard others talk about this kind of longing, but he’d never experienced it himself. He wanted Kacie Jo with a fierce protectiveness he hadn’t known was possible.

  And as he realized the truth of that statement, his kisses changed from those of pleasure to those of some deep unspoken meaning. He hoped Kacie Jo heard the message.

  Donovan’s kiss promised too much. Kacie Jo hadn’t planned this, and she should’ve learned by now the danger of going down roads she hadn’t planned on taking.

  But she couldn't deny Donovan. She acknowledged that truth as his lips hovered over her neck. She hadn’t even realized she’d been dreaming of this moment until he’d kissed her.

  She wanted this. Wanted more if she were honest with herself.

  She reached under his shirt and brushed the smooth hot skin of his chest where his collarbone stuck out more on the left than on the right. His flat nipples hardened under her fingertips.

  Eyes closed, she moved forward and replaced her fingers with her lips, enjoying the sound of his breath as it caught in response to her touch. To think she had this kind of power over a man like him.

  The idea left her practically giddy.

  She moved her lips back to his, content to lay in his arms the rest of the evening if that’s what he wanted, but more than ready to throw her clothes across the room and let him inside just as well.

  She ached for the feel of him. Would she ever not again?

  As his hand slowly moved to the vee between her legs, she heard the noise that had tried to make its way through the sexual web Donovan had worked at weaving since his lips had first touched hers.

  The sharp knocks could belong to only one person. She groaned in both frustration and thankfulness. At her groan Donovan pulled back. “What?”

  She leaned her head back against the arm of the couch. “I think there’s a very good chance we have company.”

  Pushing Donovan away, Kacie Jo stood and rearranged her clothes. When she would’ve moved to answer the door, Donovan stopped her with a hand on her arm.

  “Don’t.”

  How could she tell him this interruption was the only thing that stood between sanity and the biggest mistake of her life? Especially when that mistake would be letting him make love to her again.

  “I have to. Grady has a key.”

  That got his attention. Only he did the strangest thing. He smiled. “Well then I’d highly suggest you go get yourself straightened out,” he said, not at all worried that her brother was about to catch them halfway to naked.

  In the background she heard Grady and Eliza ask her to open the door, but she didn’t care.

  “Grady, hold your horses. I’ll open up in a minute. And when I do, you’re right, I’m killing you.”

  Chapter Eight

  Despite Kacie Jo’s warning, the minute she walked out of the room, Donovan opened her front door.

  “Where’s Kacie Jo?” Grady barked the question and looked at him like he was a serial killer.

  Eliza smacked Grady in the back, but Donovan could tell Kacie Jo's best friend was wondering the same thing.

  “What? You think I came over here and she couldn’t handle it so she ran off somewhere to hide? Are you nuts? Do you even know your sister?”

  Grady’s eyes narrowed and Donovan’s hand instinctively rubbed his bruised chin. The last thing in the world he needed or wanted was to get in a fistfight with Grady.

  It was one thing for Grady to lay him out flat over the news that Kacie Jo was pregnant. Hell, he deserved that. But no way was it happening again. He was here, and he was doing the right thing.

  Thankfully, Kacie Jo chose that time to make her presence known. She walked forward slowly, eyes steaming as she silently let Grady know there’d be hell to pay before long.

  For all her anger, she still stood as far away from him as she could without actually leaving the room. Like she didn’t trust herself around him.

  “Isn’t this a pretty little party?”

  Kacie Jo's words were tinged with saccharine sweetness and Donovan winced at the sound.

  Whatever else though, this was Kacie Jo’s fight. She stood, hands on her hips, hair billowing around her face, eyes narrowed, looking every bit like an outraged Valkyrie.

  “You dropped him off at my front door and left, Grady. Look at him.”

  She pointed across the room and Donovan suddenly f
elt every bit the part of a laboratory specimen. Kacie Jo wasn’t finished.

  “He has two black eyes for crying out loud, Grady. What did you have to do to get him home? Bail him out of prison in some third world country? And now you want to come over and protect me?”

  Donovan didn’t figure this was the time to let her know how right she was. Judging by the speechless look on Grady’s face he agreed. Eliza must’ve known where Grady’d found him because suddenly her gaze was more speculative than anything else as she looked first at him and then at Kacie Jo.

  When he would’ve interrupted, defended himself, tried to change the subject to why it was a good thing that Donovan Nelson was standing in Kacie Jo Jenkins’ living room, Eliza ended all hope for conversation.

  Grabbing Grady’s hand, she steered Kacie Jo’s brother to the front door. “Come on, Grady. I don’t think we’re wanted.”

  Even though Grady was allowing Eliza to move him to the door, Donovan wasn’t fooled for a second.

  When Grady finally spoke, he made sure everyone in the room understood why he was there.

  “I didn’t bring you back to ruin my sister’s life, Nelson. You better remember that. Because I’ll kick your ass a lot further away than Mexico if you forget.”

  Then he turned to a spitting mad Kacie Jo, looking like a guy who knew he’d made a mistake and would do anything in the world to make it up. Donovan wondered if the mistake was in the warning or in bothering to tell him about the baby.

  He didn’t have to wait long to find out. Grady’s words confirmed what Donovan figured anyway.

  “When you didn’t answer the phone, I got worried,” he said sheepishly. “I wanted to make sure you hadn’t done something...”

  Grady trailed off and Kacie Jo rolled her eyes as she stared at her brother and best friend pointedly. “What? Like kill him?” Kacie Jo pointed at the door and said one word.

  “Out!” She practically spit. “Get out now. And don’t come back, Grady. I mean it. Don’t you dare. Not until I tell you I want to hear from you.”

  Anything that took her anger away from him was a good thing. He might as well go in for the kill, try to make it a you-and-me-against-the-world moment.