The Meat Tree

by Gwyneth Lewis

Mind you, I think she started to come round when I said that she should take the part of Gwydion for the next visit. Then she can be sure that nothing will happen against her will.

  She

  If it were up to me, I’d go nowhere near that VR again. But he’s fixated on it, and he’s the boss.

  He

  That long chat last night helped a lot, when I took her through the work I’d done on the body suits. I like to think that some old-fashioned patience and reassurance made all the difference.

  She

  I’m beginning to see why they’re phasing out these individual Inspectors. They spend much too much time on their own, making up stuff about what they find. They’re bonkers. He’s the most eccentric man I’ve ever met. He doesn’t even use his channeller to help get him off to sleep. I’ve seen him reading. The man’s not in the real world.

  He

  The human touch. It’s what these youngsters are lacking. Once she saw the logic of going back in, she was with me.

  She

  Bloody fascist. He made a show of consulting me, but he knows damn well that if I want to pass this section of my certificate, I have to do what he says. Well, I’m damned if I’m going to let an old fool stand between me and my diploma. So, it’s game on.

  Joint Thought Channel 1 Feb 2210, 09:00

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Remember that I’ve rigged up that special bailout route via the eye-movement sensor, so that it’s faster than before.

  Apprentice

  Got it.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  When we go in, you grab Gwydion and I’ll stick to Gilfaethwy. I’m sure that this visit we’ll find the Mastermind entrance, so that we can see who’s controlling the whole story. All right?

  Apprentice

  Let’s get on with it.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Oh, she’s gone. Wait for me!

  Apprentice

  Hurry up! This looks quite straightforward. Gwydion and Gilfaethwy standing in front of King Math. No sign of any women. I’m taking the Gwydion part… now!

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Yes, looks like payback time for the rape. Odd, Math’s standing on the ground this time. He must be at war.

  Apprentice

  If you’d taken your character faster, you’d know that Gwydion and Gilfaethwy started a war in order to separate Math from his footholder. People have been killed so that Gilfaethwy could have his way with Goewin. He’s not a bit sorry, though. Just like a Mastermind. I bet it’s him.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Right, I’m there. As Gilfaethwy. He’s feeling pretty smug and is just interested to see what’s going to happen next.

  Apprentice

  What about Goewin? I bet she’s just been tossed aside like an old sock. Typical sexist space games.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Now, now. Let me see. Math’s decided to marry her to make good the dishonour she’s experienced at the hands of – at our hands, I should say. We’re his nephews, so he’s responsible for our behaviour. What I didn’t realise about Math before is that he’s a wizard as well.

  Apprentice

  I didn’t quite catch what he just said, did you? But I don’t like the way he’s raising that stick.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  That’s not a stick, it’s his magic wand. I think that’s bad news for us. Duck!

  Apprentice

  What happened?

  Inspector of Wrecks

  He’s gone. Where are we now? The programme’s still creasing I think. This doesn’t make sense.

  Apprentice

  It’s so quiet. We’re in an oak forest. I feel quite different.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Oh my God, this is beyond weird.

  Apprentice

  I can smell fear on you, adrenalin – it’s sour.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  The smells are very strong here. They’re about a hundred times more vivid than usual.

  Apprentice

  Yes, it’s almost like seeing the path of a spoor. I can sense where a rabbit’s paws have left damp marks on that rock over there. His scent’s a delicious cloud.

  You smell quite musky. This is like being a child again, and being able to pick up salt on the skin of adults.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  I feel jumpy though. I’m sure there’s a threat here, even though it looks peaceful. I’m on a hair-trigger. Get ready to run. Do you feel it?

  Apprentice

  No, no, I’m sure everything’s fine. I’m keeping a watch. That water has cinquefoil and liquorish in it. Let’s get a drink.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Are you sure it’s safe?

  Apprentice

  Come on, you sissy. Call yourself a man? Look, I’ll show you. See? It’s perfectly secure. The water’s… oh shit!

  Inspector of Wrecks

  See, I told you, I told you. Get ready to run!

  Apprentice

  What’s this on my head? I hit it on the stones. Campion! I can’t find my hands to feel what I am. I seem to have hooves. Campion, come here!

  Inspector of Wrecks

  You’re secreting so much adrenalin that you’re making me panic. There’s danger, danger all around. Don’t know where to look, where to flee.

  Apprentice

  Look in the water… I can’t touch my head because I’m a stag. I’ve got a branch of horns on my head, like a candelabra. Head up, scent the air and that tells me everything I need to know. Yes, Gilfaethwy beside me smelling of musk and hormones, my hind.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  This is confusing. Nona’s playing a man who’s been turned into a stag. That must be what Math was doing with his staff, he’s turned the two brothers into deer as punishment for the rape.

  Apprentice

  He’s done more than that.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  What kind of punishment is this? Two brothers get to hang out in the woods for a year, enjoying each other’s company.

  Apprentice

  You don’t get it, do you?

  Deep breath, satisfaction. Pine needles, sour-sweet smell of doe.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  The forest looks fertile and how hard can it be to spend a year grazing? As penances go, this isn’t so bad.

  Apprentice

  Long months since I shed my velvet…

  He’s turned us into animals because we behaved like beasts. But the point is that he’s transformed Gwydion into a stag and Gilfaethwy into a hind.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  So I’m the female?

  Apprentice

  Flex my strong neck. Bow down, look upwards and I can see the tines of my horns: bay, trey, sur-royal and crown. Tilt forward and stretch my powerful back legs.

  Come here. Let me sniff the piss spilt down the fur of your hock. Hmm. Aromatic, sweet with an abrasive edge. It’s exciting.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Your scent’s disturbing. Testosterone, crushed acorns. Don’t stand so close.

  Apprentice

  I need to smell…

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Geddoff me! You’re acting like a stag in rut.

  Apprentice

  That’s what I am! You’re a doe in oestrus. Math clearly intends us to mate!

  Inspector of Wrecks

  You’re making me nervous. Back off!

  Apprentice

  Close her on the oak tree, stop her from turning her haunches away… rub-urine… her tarsal gland tells me she’s ready…

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Shit, you’re my brother. Don’t you dare.

  Apprentice

  No, I’m a dominant buck. Can’t you see how my neck is swollen? That’s better, you’re getting into your part.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Why am I squatting? My rear has a will of its own and I’m half sitting down. My body’s insisting.

  Never imagined that
I could be two. Gilfaethwy and doe. No, three, I’m Campion, rapist and submissive doe all at the same time. How the body responds with joy to the rutting, spirit extends…

  To have sex with my brother! With my assistant! To know the sound of her grunting behind me. That bastard Math.

  Apprentice

  Forget about weirdness. This feels so right. I’m swimming a stream which goes through her back, into her body and I feel inside…

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Mind of a man in a stinking animal…

  Apprentice

  Mind of the body, as the lichen lays in the moss and the tree sucks sweet water up, like a tide…

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Passive, like soil, no will of my own…

  Apprentice

  Till it explodes. And I’m falling, light-liquid, falling back down from a red doe’s haunches.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Oh, the shame.

  Apprentice

  To be complete as an animal, nothing is better. To smell of come.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  With my brother!

  Apprentice

  What have I done?

  *

  Synapse Log 2 Feb 2210, 11:00

  Apprentice

  Campion hasn’t met my eye since our last turn in the VR. It’s not as if I raped him. It was all perfectly natural. That’ll teach him to take what I experienced lightly. I feel like telling him that it’s only VR, but I don’t quite dare.

  For me, it was a really interesting experience, a chance to see what it’s like to be a wild animal. I’m quite looking forward to the next visit. He’s given us a day off, shut himself up in the lab, pretending to do dust analysis. But I bet he’s just recovering from the shock of being a doe and being fucked by me. No, by a buck. Or should I say his brother Gwydion?

  I want to say sorry, but how do you apologise for being a stag in rut?

  Inspector of Wrecks

  There’s far more vegetable matter here than you’d expect in the atmospherics of a ship, even an Earth one. Of course, they had the usual hydroponics system to keep the atmosphere sweet and to give the crew fresh food. But those early systems were highly risky. Like keeping a fire alive by making sure it never went out. If for any reason you had a disease which killed all your plants at the same time and you weren’t able to save a seed, then you were in big trouble.

  She

  I liked being a stag. OK, there was the hunger and the constant nerves but I felt fit as a flea and I loved the forest. All those smells!

  He

  Now that we have those vegetable stem cells, we can grow anything from scratch, without having to propagate.

  I know I shouldn’t object to what happened in the VR, but I can’t help feeling that the story’s making it hard to be professional. I mean, how can you supervise someone you’ve mated with and whose child you’ve borne against your will?

  She

  Poor Campion, I thought he was going to have a fit when he realised that he was pregnant.

  He

  I’m an experienced enough traveller to know that you lose all dignity on a space trip. But that’s usually to do with toilet matters, not being banished to a forest with your student, turned into an animal and forced to reproduce.

  Mind you, the birth was kind of interesting. I’ve often wondered what it feels like to have a baby. Though I guess that bearing a fawn doesn’t quite count. Animals are better at it than women; they seem to suffer less pain. Even that was enough. But I never even lay down, just stood. And oh, the baby’s sweet aroma when he came out!

  She

  So Campion and I are parents! And when the year of being deer was over, we went back to Math and showed him the fawn.

  He

  What’s amazing, though, in all this, is that the sensations of being a mother were so much more sophisticated than they should be, given the primitive VR equipment we were wearing. I can’t understand it. How did I know to lick the fawn’s faeces and urine in order to hide his scent? It’s as if instinct was wired into the game in a way I can’t explain.

  She

  And Math seemed pleased and touched the fawn. And suddenly there he was, a lovely strong boy, much larger than he should be for his age. Though I suppose, I’d been counting in deer, not human, time.

  He

  I was horrified when Math turned the boy into a human child. That made it real, somehow. While we were in the forest, we were just animals. I was glad when Math sent the boy away to be baptised and fostered.

  I wanted nothing to do with the creature.

  6

  Breeding Season

  Joint Thought Channel 3 Feb 2210, 09:00

  Apprentice

  I still don’t think it’s fair that I’ve got to be Gilfaethwy this time. You said you’d keep me from being sexually molested again. I don’t want to be the female like you were last time.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  As far as sex goes, we’re quits. You’ve been raped, I’ve been topped by a buck. Look, we don’t know what will happen next. You’ve just as good a chance of being safe in Gilfaethwy as anybody else.

  Apprentice

  Like hell.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  What was that? If I thought you were being insubordinate, you’d be back on Mars in a trice.

  Apprentice

  No, no, I wasn’t. Please don’t send me back.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  There are lots of people who would give their right arm for this opportunity…

  Apprentice

  OK, OK. I’ll take Gilfaethwy, even if it means being punished some more.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  It’s got nothing to do with what happened last time. I need to be Gwydion because it’s looking more and more likely that he’s the Mastermind. And if we can find his domain, then there’s a chance that its archaeology will show us what happened on board this ship. After all, we have nothing else to go on.

  Apprentice

  Right.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Now I don’t want to waste any more precious VR time arguing. There’s a limit to how long we can spend in this mode. Are you ready?

  Apprentice

  I am. Let’s go.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Oh, the forest again. Looks just like before. Except taller. And the smells, if anything, are even stronger.

  Apprentice

  It’s not that the trees have grown, it’s that we’re shorter. Look!

  Inspector of Wrecks

  So we are. We’re back to being animals.

  Apprentice

  Looking at you, I’d say we were some species of wild boar.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Doesn’t the soil smell sexy? I can’t keep my snout out of the humus…

  Apprentice

  I don’t want to be the bearer of bad news…

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Can you smell that fungus? Quick, I’m sure there are truffles under this oak. Dig!

  Apprentice

  But it seems to me that I’m the taller of us two…

  Inspector of Wrecks

  You’re obviously not as sensitive to scent as I am, I’m a champion hunter. Here! Look! I’ve found the delicacy, which I snuffle, scoff.

  Apprentice

  Math has swapped our roles around this year. Gwydion, who was the male last time is now the sow. And Gilfaethwy’s taking his turn as a male, so that both brothers get to learn what it is to bear young. Oh, that’s funny.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  What are you saying?

  Apprentice

  Because you swapped roles, you get to be the female again. And you know what happened last time. We’re meant to breed! You get to bear the young! That’ll teach you to cheat!

  Inspector of Wrecks

  If I were you, I’d change your tone of voice.

  Apprentice

  Sorry.

  Inspector of W
recks

  Of course, it’s perfectly fine with me to be female again. I suppose the idea is that I bear another child. Well, Math will dispose of it as he did the other. Can’t even remember its name. Hyddwn or something. Never see it again, I hope.

  Apprentice

  That’s a bit heartless, even for a sow. To bring a child into the world and then abandon it gladly.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  I never wanted it, so why should I care?

  Apprentice

  Because, even if it is a fawn, it’s our flesh and blood and we created him.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  I think you’re forgetting that this is a computer game.

  Apprentice

  Even in a game, some things are sacred.

  Inspector of Wrecks

  Hark at you! Body of a boar, mind of a woman!

  Apprentice

  But if it’s like last time, Math will turn our animal offspring into a human child. Doesn’t that mean anything to you? I’m sure it’s important. After all, we’re in here not to play but to find out what happened on board this ship. Working out the values of the crew from the VR has got to be part of the job.