A Question of Honor

by Mary Anne Wilson

  He’d sobered and hugged her. “I didn’t realize I was being so selfish. Tell you what,” he’d said with all seriousness, “if I find what I had with your mother with someone else, I might give marriage another go.”

  She’d hugged him back, laughing, figuring he’d find someone and she’d have a mother, and they’d both be happy. But as the years went by, she’d decided that some people only found that love once, and there were no second chances.

  One true love. A romantic notion, maybe, but something she’d thought long and hard about. And maybe that was why, as she grew up, she’d never had any serious relationships. Not one of the men she’d dated had qualified as being close to her one true love. She wasn’t sure what would happen when that man came into her life, but she knew with a certainty that if he did, she would know who he was right away.

  “You sure you’re okay?” Adam asked.

  “Sure” she said, and though she didn’t know why, she added, “Mallory said that you’re a Carson.”

  “Mallory told you that?”

  “Yes,” she told him and saw the source of the green glow she’d noticed. The florist’s had green lights, a green wreath, green everything on the building, its outline twinkling prettily. “And she said that you’re with the police.”

  “Guilty on both charges,” he answered and she could feel his eyes on her. “Born a Carson and working in Dallas on the force there.”

  She took a deep breath and asked, “Why don’t you work here?”

  “I did for a year, but I ended up in Dallas.”

  “You’re good friends with that man, the cop who stopped me on my way here?”

  “John Longbow? Yeah, we’ve known each other all our lives. He was with me in the police academy and we graduated together.”

  She closed her eyes tightly. He was so connected in this town, it was a mess. She rubbed at her temple. “Did he tell you about stopping me for speeding?”

  “I was in the car with him.”

  “You were...?”

  “He was giving me a ride back to town.” He paused, then asked a question she hadn’t anticipated. “Does the friend you’re traveling with have your car?”

  Her car? Her friend? She drew a blank, then she realized what he was asking. “Oh, no, my car broke down.”

  “And where’s your friend?” The question seemed fraught with tension, but she didn’t understand why.

  “There is no friend. I’m traveling alone.”

  “Why did you lie to me about leaving town and about being with a friend?”

  He distanced himself a bit, moving back to press his back to the door. One hand was draped over the steering wheel, his fingers smoothing the leather with slow circles.

  “I didn’t lie,” she managed. She wanted to say she never lied, but that would be the biggest lie of all. “I thought I was leaving, but my car broke down, and then I thought it was fixed, and it wasn’t.”

  “And the friend?”

  She narrowed her eyes to minimize the green Christmas lights flashing across his face. “I didn’t know you, and I just thought it was easier to say that than to go into what I’m doing here.”

  “And what are you doing in Wolf Lake?”

  That was a huge slip. She hadn’t even thought before she said it. “Getting away for a rest,” she ad-libbed with a confidence that startled her. When had lying become so easy for her?”

  She had to change the conversation. “And you’re a Carson. You never even told me that you’re part of that family and probably own most of the area.”

  He shrugged and his fingers on the leather stilled. “No, just a chunk. It’s mostly the Wolf clan that have the land. That comes from my grandfather’s people on my mother’s side. They moved around, half of them on the res, and the other half, striking out for other places. My grandfather’s immediate family stayed close, helping to establish Wolf Lake, and he developed a part of the Wolf family land grant right above the newer ranch where the party was held last night.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me who you are?”

  Despite the tension, that brought an easy smile to his face, and even in the green glow, she could see that dimple come to life. “You never asked, and I actually thought you probably knew.” He shifted, moving a bit closer, and the smile stayed put. “I am a Carson, but that’s where it ends.” He motioned a hand in general around them. “This isn’t mine, none of it. I work for a living, and I’m only here off and on for visits, like now.”

  He worked for a living. She bit her lip hard. “So the ranch is...?”

  “It started as my grandfather’s, and the Carson land came though my mother from him. My mother and father developed the more southern area into the main ranch. My grandfather stayed at the adobe he’d built on about three hundred acres. The rest of his kids, seven in all, spread out to other parts of the land.”

  “But you left.”

  “I live in Dallas, I told you, and just came back for the holidays.” He exhaled roughly. “No, that isn’t completely true. I’m here for the holidays, but I came back because my oldest brother has been going through some things I thought I could help him with.”

  A cop with the mind-set of a rescuer. He’d helped her and he’d come all the way home to help his brother. “I hope it works out for you, and for him.”

  “It will,” he said almost as if he was assuring himself of that, rather than her. “It will.” He reached for the gearshift. “Let’s try moving and see how it goes.”

  “Fine,” she murmured, hoping he could see the road more clearly than she could.

  As if Adam read her concern, he touched her hand with his again, closing his fingers around hers and saying softly, “It won’t be long. Hang in there.” He squeezed her hand slightly before letting it go.

  * * *

  AS THEY PARKED at the inn, Adam’s phone rang again. Moses. Adam answered it. “Yes?”

  “Where are you?” Moses demanded.

  “At the inn. Chief found Bingo and—”

  “I know. They’re here now and the mother showed up. Hazel found her. But Mallory said Faith was not at the inn yet. Are there problems?”

  “Only this snow and the icy roads. We stopped for a bit by the florist’s shop and talked.” He looked ahead at the lit porch. “We’re about to go in now.”

  “Talked? Faith is okay?”

  “Seems to be. That medicine helped a lot.”

  “What aren’t you telling me?”

  Faith was listening, so Adam asked, “What do you mean?”

  “I know you think she’s in trouble and you have to do something about that.”

  “Okay,” he said. “So?”

  “So did she ask you to do something about that?”

  He really hated the direct way Moses dealt with life and with his friends. “No.”

  “Then why?”

  Adam could have gone into a long explanation about how helping people made him feel good, or how just because he wasn’t in uniform didn’t mean he couldn’t give her a hand. But he didn’t. He couldn’t. And there was no answer he could get a handle on that he’d believe himself.

  He looked at Faith, and the simple truth came. He just wanted to help her. She touched something in him that he hadn’t admitted to himself until the kiss. So he did the predictable thing when he was uncomfortable with a question. He met it with one of his own. “Why not?”

  “Whatever,” Moses said, annoying Adam with that response.

  “Yeah, whatever,” he muttered.

  “Get her inside, and make sure when she takes the pills I gave her that she eats something.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Just do it,” Moses said and hung up.

  Adam stared at the phone, then slipped it into his pocket. He’d wal
ked away from a lot of situations where he could have done some good if he’d made a point of interfering. He’d had to. He could only do so much as a cop, and he wouldn’t beat himself up about the rest. But with Faith, it was personal and getting more personal every time he was close to her. He had a gut feeling if he didn’t try to help her, and if anything happened to her, he wouldn’t forgive himself. That was a fact, and he couldn’t and wouldn’t hide from it.

  CHAPTER TEN

  FAITH WAS VERY STILL. She hadn’t been watching him talk on the phone after all. Her head was back against the headrest, and her eyes were closed.

  “Any better?” Adam asked, worried because she’d been so talkative only moments ago.

  “Perfect.”

  “You’re a bad liar,” he said, seeing a flush to her skin now and a thin film of perspiration. A single dark curl clung to the dampness on her forehead.

  “I’m sorry for this,” she murmured thickly.

  She was sorry? “Why, did you wish for a migraine?”

  She put a hand to her cheek and he saw unsteadiness in the contact. “You needed to help that little boy, and I got in the way.”

  What happened to the woman who had interrogated him about being a Carson? Her voice broke on the last few words, and he saw moisture at the corners of her eyes. There was something there, but about her father, not her mother. He didn’t think before reaching over to close his hand on hers the way he had before, a move so natural to him that it shocked him. “No, it’s resolved now. Chief took care of it. Everything’s just fine.”

  She bit her lip but didn’t move away from his touch. “Will he be okay?”

  “He’s got the best doctor around. He’ll be better in no time.” Adam drew back, breaking their contact, and he felt as if he’d been set adrift.

  “I hope so.”

  He stared at her, wishing he could read her expression. “Trust me, he’ll be okay.”

  She surprised him by saying, “Thank you,” again, in little more than a whisper. He saw her eyes narrow, as if she were trying to focus on him. “You are so...” Her tongue touched her pale lips.

  He wanted to repeat her comment, but didn’t. Instead, he asked something that had been bugging him since they’d started this talk. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Okay.” She pronounced the word so that it sounded like two words, oh and kay.

  “When are you actually leaving Wolf Lake?”

  She grimaced. “Why?”

  “I’m getting whiplash watching you leave, then not leave, then leave, then not leave.” He smiled, trying to keep things light, but he really wanted the truth.

  Her grimace morphed into a look he’d seen on more than one guilty criminal. “I was leaving,” she said. “I meant to leave, but things changed. I told you about the stupid car.” She sounded almost petulant now. “I have this car that I just bought and it worked fine, then it burned up.”

  She shifted, looking uncomfortable and embarrassed. He hadn’t heard of a car fire in town, and that was something someone would have mentioned. “There was a fire?”

  “I was going the first time, but then the car wouldn’t start and I smelled something burning. I thought it was a battery, but it was the wiring. It melted. And when I saw you in the coffee shop, I thought I was leaving then, or the next day, but I didn’t. And the car still isn’t fixed, even though I thought I was going right after the dance.” She sped up as she spoke. “And I thought for sure the car would be done by now, but it’s not.”

  Well, at least a part of the puzzle called Faith made sense to him. “So this has all been about your car breaking down?”

  “Pretty much,” she said, not making any effort to get out of the truck. “I couldn’t leave. I wanted to. I needed to. I can’t stay here.”

  “Why?”

  “I have to get back.”

  He frowned at her. “Back where?”

  She exhaled harshly. “Just back, okay?”

  “To Illinois?”

  That brought a fiery look from her that took him aback. She had color now, blotches of red at her cheeks, and her even teeth had trapped her bottom lip. “What?” she said in a tight voice.

  “I thought your car had Illinois plates on it,” he said reasonably.

  “So that means I’m from Illinois, I guess?” she said, sitting up straighter. “But I told you I bought the car used, and this all makes me wonder what sort of cop you are.”

  Whoa, he was losing control of everything here. “Just go ahead and say whatever you need to say, then I’ll get you inside,” he offered. Enough was enough. She needed to be in bed.

  “I have to ask you something, and I don’t want you to think I’m crazy,” she said in a breathy voice.

  He didn’t want this. He’d already had his control tested once this evening. Now the look in those eyes was unsettling. There was an urgency in her gaze, a need for him to let her ask her question. He finally relented.

  “Did I... Did you and I... Did you kiss me, or did I...?”

  Her distress was almost his undoing. He wanted to say that nothing had happened, nothing important, but that was an incredible lie, at least for him. “You were upset and talking about your dad, and I thought maybe your dad had passed or something.”

  “No,” she said abruptly. “No, he didn’t pass. He’s okay. He will be okay.”

  “Then I’m sorry.” As good as he was at being able to read people, to prove his hunches correct, every time he thought he had a handle on this woman, he was all wrong.

  “What else did I say?” she asked in a slow, measured way. She was rubbing at her temple again.

  “Nothing much, not really.”

  She seemed to be figuring something out, then took him aback when she asked, “I told you I’m between jobs, didn’t I?”

  He watched her closely. “You didn’t say what your job was or what you’re looking for in employment.”

  “I take care of money.” She stopped rubbing her temple. “Boring stuff.”

  “You’re in banking?” he prodded gently.

  “Oh, I guess so.”

  “And you need to get back to find a job or something?”

  “Yes,” she said and glanced out the windshield. “We’re here?” she asked, seemingly surprised that they were sitting in front of the inn.

  “Yes, we are. And you need to get out of the cold.”

  He left the truck, going around to her door quickly. He wondered about calling Moses. She seemed confused, probably because of the medication. He wasn’t at all sure it was safe to just leave her here.

  Adam pulled open the passenger door. “Faith?” She seemed to shiver at the sound of her name, and then she turned and looked at him. “Do you want me to take you back to the hospital?”

  “No,” she said, fumbling to undo her seat belt. She gripped the armrest on the door with one hand and the door frame with the other, moving slowly on the seat, one foot coming down to find the step for support. Adam wouldn’t mind carrying her if he had to. But she was making it on her own, only taking his hand when she stepped down onto the snowy ground.

  They went into the inn, and as they pushed the door open, the heat hit them. Adam barely had time to swing the door shut before Mallory burst out of the back area.

  “There you are!” she said, heading toward them. “I was getting so worried.” She was carrying a small tray in her hands as she came to them, acknowledging Adam with a glance and then Faith. “Moses called and said you’d left there a long time ago.” She held up the tray that had a mug of clear tea, a dish with crackers and some sliced fruit in a bowl. “He said to make sure you eat something, even if it’s just the crackers.” Mallory motioned with her head toward the stairs. “Lead the way and let’s get you settled.”

  Faith cast Adam a grat
eful look, then she followed Mallory.

  He watched Faith go, wanting to join the procession to make sure she got to the top safely. “Mallory, the medication John gave her is making her a bit disoriented.”

  “Moses told me about it and to make sure she got food. That’ll take care of it. Don’t you worry.”

  “Okay,” he said, but didn’t make a move to go.

  * * *

  FAITH GLANCED BACK at Adam still standing at the bottom of the stairs. She managed to make her way along the upper hallway, and Mallory passed her to get her door open.

  By the time she stepped into the room, Mallory had the light on, the bed turned down and the tray on the nightstand. In the distance, Faith heard the door chime and she knew Adam had gone.

  Mallory pushed the tray closer to the bed. “Do you need help getting undressed?”

  “Oh, no, I’m okay,” she said, although she felt fairly weak. She slipped off her jacket, and Mallory helped her tug off her boots.

  “Moses said he gave you pills for later?” she asked.

  Faith pointed to her jacket. “They’re in my pocket, I think.”

  Mallory searched the pockets, but came up empty. “Nothing there.”

  Faith tried to think. “Oh, no, I must have left them in Adam’s truck.” She started to get up, but Mallory stopped her.

  “Oh, no, you don’t. I’ll go see if I can stop him before he leaves.”

  She was back in less than a minute, holding the foil packets of pills. “Good luck. He was on his phone in the truck, so I caught him.” She put the packets on the nightstand. “Moses said you should take them in three hours, not any sooner. And don’t forget to eat a bit with the pill, okay?”

  “Yes,” Faith said, thankful that Mallory cared so much. “I’m really tired,” she admitted.

  Mallory nodded, then crossed the room. “Call if you need me,” she said as she reached for the doorknob.

  Faith watched her and heard herself ask, “Was Adam always this helpful?”

  Mallory looked startled. “What?”

  “He seems to be a natural do-gooder, helping me like this and trying to help that little boy. And his brother, too,” she added, hearing her words getting a bit thick with emotion.