Still Breathing

by Rita Michaels

  “It's not important,” she said, reaching for the phone to turn it off, but Ethan got off of her.

  “It could be work,” he said, fixing his shirt. When he rose, Bri stared at the bulge in his black pants.

  “I will call back later,” Bri said without glancing at her phone. The caller was relentless.

  “Answer it,” Ethan said, giving her a peck on her cheek. He rose and headed to the kitchen leaving a deflated and disappointed Bri on the now roughly made bed.

  Angry she took the phone and glanced at the screen. Unknown number. Bri wondered who it was. She'd spoken to her ailing aunt the night before. The RN at the retirement home she recently started volunteering in knew her phone number, and she stored theirs under Joan retirement home.

  Ethan walked back in. “Who was it?” he asked.

  “Unknown,” she replied. He sat beside her and tucked a loose lock of hair back in place behind her ear. The wonder sensation began to slowly ebb away. Bri sat, disappointed. She wished he would continue.

  “Any idea who it could be?”

  “Obviously not work,” she replied. She'd reported the incident at the mall to her supervisor and agent. They'd somewhat believed her, and let her continue work, but had warned that if the verdict came out as guilty, her job relationship with them was kaput. She had two months before the next court date.

  She raised her hand up again, smiling. “Thanks for the ring.”

  “No. Thank you for accepting me,” Ethan said. He drew closer to her.

  “So, “ Bri began, you want to spend your life with this freckled recluse?”

  He nodded, smiling.

  “Why?” she asked.

  “So I would know what's like to live with a recluse. Just joking,” he said. “I've never seen a model call herself a recluse.”

  “But I am,” Bri said. “I don't out except work and grocery stores. And sometimes my aunt's place. And now your place.”

  “Did you count how many places you just mentioned, excluding your photo shoot studios?”

  “Still,” Bri started.

  “Still you're not a hermit. That reminds me. My MMA match comes up this weekend. I hope you come with me.”

  “And watch you get pummeled by some guy?”

  “Your concern for me is a little... What should I call it?”

  “A little too empathetic?” Bri said.

  “You make me feel like a wimp. Like I can't defend myself.” Ethan said.

  “I can't bear to see you hurt. I'm sorry, but people do collapse in the ring.”

  “It's nine years I've been a fighter. I never lost a match, never. I train hard and fight to the very last of my strength.”

  “I don't doubt your strength, neither am I discouraging you from living your dream, but do you have any plans to quit soon?”

  He gazed at her as if she'd just stripped him off his title and handed it to a weaker opponent.

  “Why?” he asked. Bri sensed a change in his countenance.

  “I…was only asking. Am not saying you should. Just curious.” Bri said, biting her bottom lip and silently kicking herself for being too forward.

  My stupid mind she thought, and then wondered why her mouth wouldn't keep her thoughts within her. Once she thought about something that should've been a secret buried within her, the next moment she saw who it was about, she blurted it.

  “Just my thought,” she said.

  “What would you rather I did for a living?” he asked.

  “Whatever you choose to do,” she replied. His face warmed up.

  “I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life it's just….” She paused; careful to choose her words wisely.

  “Let’s make a deal,” Ethan said, smiling mischievously.

  “What is it?”

  “How about we do it this way. When you quit, I'll quit as well,” he said.

  “What? What's wrong with my kind of job?” Ethan smiled. He must be enjoying this, Bri thought.

  “Let's see,” he put his index finger to his chin as if pondering on where to start. “I don't like other men seeing you in lingerie. I would rather you model with clothes on rather than lingerie.” Bri gazed, speechless. “And,” he continued, “I want my wife to stay home and take care of the kids….”

  “What? A stay at home mom,” Bri said, nodding her head.

  “Is anything wrong with that?”

  “Yes. Everything. Maybe I”ll have to go on my knees and crawl for you to scrap that out of your plans for me. I'd like to have some sort of financial freedom. I want to work.”

  “You won't want for nothing. I can give you everything you need,” he said, watching her intently. Bri nodded her refusal. She hoped he was pulling her legs, but from the expression on his face, Bri felt he was not joking.

  “That's like sending the women's movement back two hundred years. I could be a working mom.” Ethan said nothing further. He knew he would have his way, eventually.

  “Can I meet Sasha?” he asked. Bri's eyes lit up.

  “Why not?” she said, surprised. “Thought you'd never ask.” She rose, took his hand and waited for him as he rose up to follow her. He wrapped his arm around her waist as she led him into her bedroom. When she got to her dresser her smile faded into sadness.

  She picked up the urn on the dresser and handed it to Ethan who took it and stared at Sasha's little angelic face. Bri had posted her baby picture on the urn, giving the ashes a face.

  “She was so pretty. Just like you,” Ethan said. Bri nodded sadly. Her heart hurt from the word was.

  “I'm sorry this is the closest I can get to you,” Ethan said to the urn as if it could hear him. Bri's eyes teared up.

  “I promise to take care of your mom and make her happy again. If she lets me,” he said. He placed the urn back on the dresser and reached for her face, wiping her tears from one eye to the other and then held onto her.

  “Thank you,” was all Bri could mutter.

  He took her hand as they walked back to her living room.

  “I'm happy to meet her. She was so cute.”

  “Everyone loved her. She was a fighter.”

  “I could see that in her eyes,” Ethan said.

  “When is your match?” Bri said, changing the subject.

  “In two days. But we can't go together.”

  “Why?”

  “Because my coach would like to train with me and get other things ready that I don't want to bore you with. So…” he reached into his pant pocket and pulled out a single key. He handed it to her.

  “What is this for?” she asked.

  “A car. I want you to have one of my cars for keep.”

  “What?”

  “It's now yours,” he said, amused by her surprise.

  “Ethan, you're so full of surprises. She hugged and pecked him on the cheek. “thank you so much,” she said and hugged him again. Ethan noticed she felt happier with the car than the ring but said nothing. She was happy. That was all that mattered. She ran to the window and gazed at the navy blue Nissan Sentra car that was now hers. He rose.

  “Are you leaving?” she asked. The smile washed off of her face.

  “Yes.”

  “Please stay. Tomorrow is my day off. I don't want to spend it alone.”

  “Then come to my house. Spend time with me.” Bri pondered.

  “Alright,” she said. He waited.

  “You know I don't have a ride home,” Ethan said, chuckling.

  “That means I get to take you home in my new car,” she said, excited. “I'll get my night bag ready,” she said and strutted to the bedroom.

  They stepped outside. The chilly cold hit her skin. She shuddered.

  “I hate this weather. I don't like fall season.”

  “I can keep you warm at night, but during the day, you'll have to make do with a warm coat.”

  She eyed him playfully. “Don't I know that. And you just made life easier for me by handing me a car,” she said as they stopped by the ve
hicle.

  “Would you like me to drive?” he asked, his palm open to receive the key.

  “Hell no. It's my car now, and you are my passenger.” She stepped into it, her cheeks burning with a smile spread wide all over her face. “I can't stop smiling,” she said.

  “Then don't.”

  36

  ⸙

  Christine and Brittany watched as the couple sat in the car, unmoving. They watched as Ethan reached across and gave Bri a full-mouth kiss before Bri started the car. They waited for another five minutes before the car moved.

  At first, the car seemed operated by a novice as it pulled out of her parking lot. They noticed a lot of hand movement by Ethan, and lots of head nodding by Bri.

  “She can't even handle the car,” Christine said with disgust.

  “Duck,” Brittany said to Christine as Bri drove by. “Well?” Brittany said as they both straightened up when the coast was clear.

  “Change of plan,” Christine said. “This time, I will make sure she tries everything possible to detach herself from him.”

  “How are you going to achieve that?” Brittany asked.

  “When does she visit the retirement home?”

  “Once a week. Every Friday.”

  “Friday is too far,” Christine said. “I want him before Friday. That means I want her gone by mid-week.” Brittany's brow furrowed.

  “What did you mean, gone?” Brittany asked. Christine turned to her. A wicked grin on her face.

  “Mort,” she said in french.

  “No. Christine, you are going overboard.”

  “Yes, I am. Ethan is my first love. No other woman should find happiness marrying him than I.”

  “But you messed that up when you slept with his brother.”

  Slap. Brittany turned to her in disbelief.

  “You slapped me?”

  Christine turned the other way and stared out of the car window at passing cars.

  “I'm sorry,” she muttered. “But I told you to never mention it again.” Brittany rubbed her cheek where it burned. “His brother forced himself on me. I didn't go to him.”

  “I can't,” Brittany said.

  “Why? But I said I was sorry.”

  “I can't kill anyone for you,” Brittany said. She started the car.

  “You said you'd do anything for me,” Christine said.

  “I did. This is me changing my mind.”

  “Why are you acting timid?” Christine asked.

  “I'm not. It's just… she sighed. “I'm done been evil towards someone whose path never crossed with mine.”

  “She's nothing to you,” Christine said. “Her life means nothing, and her death will take nothing off you.”

  “Actually, it will.”

  “How? Tell me,” Christine hissed.

  “She's nana's caregiver.”

  A long silence enveloped the car.

  “She knows you?” Christine asked, horrified.

  “Yes. She gives me a daily account of nana's health and care.”

  “Why didn't you tell me she knows you personally?”

  Brittany shrugged. “You wanted vengeance by all means. Nothing I said would've stopped you.”

  “Do you know what this means? It means we are dead. You just hung us.”

  “I didn't ask her to volunteer at the retirement home. Neither did I ask her to pick interest in nana.”

  “Well, go tell them at the retirement home that you don't want her by nana anymore.”

  “I can't,” Brittany said. “It will crush nana.”

  “She'll get over it. After all, she can't really remember much after a day.” That angered Brittany.

  “I thought I was the mean one in the family, but you do take the cake.”

  “I wonder why it took you so long to realize that. You are my minion.”

  “Hmm,” Brittany said, nodding her head. “This minion just retired. You can fight your battles yourself. I will drop you off at the bus terminal.”

  “What? You know I have no one else to live with here,” Christine said.

  “You should’ve remembered that when you slapped me and said those mean words to me.” Christine reached for her shoulder and patted it.

  “Common. You know it's just one of our usual fights. I wasn't intentionally being mean to you. You provoked me.”

  “All the same am scared of you.”

  “Scared of me, why?” Christine asked, puzzled.

  “Because you are capable of murder,” Brittany said as she turned into her apartment parking lot.

  “You know I couldn't put a knife on anyone.”

  “Of course. You'd rather I did it.”

  “Will you help me?” Christine pushed one last time.

  “I will. To fix all the mess we created.”

  “You wouldn't dare!” Christine said in a voice different from hers. Brittany turned to her.

  “Seriously, you’re scaring the crap out of me.”

  “Oh, you should be scared. Remember the secret am helping you keep about the missing girl by the creek that you and your ex-boyfriend killed? I still have the secret in my head.”

  “I did not touch her,” Brittany said.

  “In my story, you will. You will be as guilty as your ex.” Christine smiled when Brittany’s face became crestfallen.

  “When?” Brittany asked.

  “That’s up to you now. Ask Ethan about his schedule, and then go from there.” Brittany gulped.

  “And if am caught?”

  “Erase my name from your memory. You must never mention me. You're on your own.”

  “Would you like to see her die?”

  “No. I don't want to go with you, and Brittany, this would be the biggest favor you ever did for me.” Brittany smiled warily. “It might be your last, too. I won't bother you anymore. Your secret, I will take with me to the grave, sister,” she said.

  Brittany cringed at the word sister. No sister would send her blood to kill and bear the consequences if caught. This Christine was a sister sent from hell. Not the one she held in such high esteem. This Christine is now filled with hate, anger, and jealousy.

  She didn't want Christine to be with her during the deed. Whatever it was she had planned to end Bri's life. Nana will be heartbroken when she hears of Bri's death. Brittany thought.

  But I have my behind to cover. Knowing Christine, she could go an extra mile to prove a point, Brittany sighed aloud as she turned in bed.

  They'd retired for the night without saying much to each other over supper. Brittany now understood she had been nothing but an abetter in Christine's drive to achieve her goals. A minion as Christine called her.

  It wasn’t her first mission to ruin a relationship. Christine had done it to the other girls Ethan dated, but this time around, she'd taken the time to come to Montreal herself. Brittany had thought this was a special one until Christine declined to come with her to the scene.

  37

  ⸙

  Bri took a last look in the mirror before walking out of Ethan's massive bathroom. She liked the spacious bathtub in the bathroom downstairs but had opted for a shower with Ethan instead.

  She smiled upon remembering how his hand felt against her skin as he caressed her and then sighed. Tonight she thought.

  She glanced at her baby blue mesh lingerie and placed her hand on her flat tummy. It was a see-through lingerie alright; a get him on his knees lingerie. She reached for a kimono robe, same color, and threw it over the lingerie. Last, she sprayed a favorite perfume she'd bought for that purpose and exited the bathroom.

  Ethan laid sprawled on the bed, his eyes fixated on his phone when Bri strolled in and stood by the door. Ethan stopped and turned to her. He smiled.

  “Aren't you going to invite me over?” she asked.

  He patted the empty spot beside him on the bed without a word. Bri walked toward him, climbed the bed and straddled him. He gazed at her, surprised.

  “Don't tempt me,” he said, his bre
ath quickening.

  “I'm not,” Bri said. She took off the kimono robe. Ethan's eyes ran all over her body. He put his phone away and grabbed her by the waist. Bri placed her hand over his.

  “Don't push me away,” she said and then leaned down and stretched over him.

  “I won't,” he said. He gently eased her off of him and placed her on the bed. Her hair spread all over the soft pillow beneath her head. He straddled her. She gazed deep into his eyes, pleading.

  “I want it to feel right,” he said, giving her a kiss.

  “I want you to make it feel right,” she said.

  “You sure you're ready?”

  She nodded yes. “I am.”

  Ethan kissed her one more time and got off of her. Bri sighed, disappointment written on her face. Ethan headed to the bathroom and returned, naked. Bri smiled. He reached for the switch and turned off the light. Then Bri felt him crawling beneath the bed cover. His warm body grazed hers.

  “Why the light?” she asked.

  “It's your first time. I want you to relax. I'll try to make it memorable for you,” he said with a smile, and then straddled her. He paused for a second. Bri thought he had changed his mind. She reached and placed her hand on his bare chest, feeling its rigidity.

  Ethan parted her legs with his knees. She exhaled sharply, waiting for him to take her. He reached and kissed her on the lips, and then moved down kissing her on her breast. She reached for her lingerie and peeled it off her body, feeling the chill in the air. She threw it on the floor.

  He placed his hand flat on her tummy and then his head slid down and stopped right above her vulva. He raised his head and gazed at her as if asking for permission.

  Her chest heaved up and down. Warmth enveloped her. She nodded; giving him a pass to do whatever he wished. And then, she exhaled sharply as she felt him enter her.

  She wrapped her legs around him as he took and claimed her.

  ⸙

  Bri awoke to the smell of coffee sitting on her bedside table. Ethan sat beside her, watching her every move.

  She reached and wrapped an arm around his waist.

  “Good morning,” he said. “I made you coffee.”