Thalia

by Larry McMurtry

  Sonny came out to report a minute or two later, meaning to tell the two that it was perfectly safe for them to come in together. Lois and Gene were at the other end of the hall, and both fairly tight besides. When he got to the car and saw what Jacy and Duane were doing, he hated to interrupt, but he wanted to let them know about Jacy’s parents. Finally he rapped on the windshield a time or two and went hastily back inside.

  Duane was annoyed that Sonny had even knocked. He was deliriously caressing Jacy’s bosom, and gladly would have given up the dance for another hour with Jacy in her present mood. For her part, Jacy was quite ready to go in, though she was careful not to show it. The evening ahead would require delicate timing, and it would be unwise to allow Duane too many goodies right at the beginning. She straightened up and smiled at him, her arms still imprisoned by the bra straps.

  “We better go in while we can,” she said, turning so her back was toward him. “Would you put my bra back on? I can’t manage it without taking off this sweater.”

  Her request was a perfect touch. She had never even used the word “bra” in Duane’s presence before, and her willingness to let him put the garment on her added a quality of intimacy to the proceedings that more than compensated for the interruption. He reached under her sweater from behind and slipped the straps up over her slim shoulders—when her arms were free she raised them and let Duane put her breasts back in their cups. When he had the bra hooked he held her a moment, feeling very tender and protective.

  A square dance was in progress as they entered the hall and Gene and Lois were dancing. All the men loved to square dance with Lois Farrow because if she was in a good mood she was tolerant of a little free-and-easy feeling around. She might be heavier at the waist than she had been once, but she was still a much prettier woman than most of the men saw at home, and they hovered around her.

  During the course of the evening Jacy noticed that more people at the dance paid attention to her mother than to her—an annoying fact that she had never noticed before. Her mother was the belle of the ball, and she wasn’t. She could tell by the men’s faces that they found her mother very attractive, and the same men hardly noticed her at all. Lois was wearing a loose white dancing dress with a low neckline; her hair was combed out long and shook about her shoulders as she danced. Jacy noticed, too, that her mother was wearing some sort of very brief, fashionable bra. The men could see her breasts move as she danced. It wasn’t that Lois’ breasts were overly large or indecently exposed, exactly; it was just that they were shaped right and exposed just enough to excite the men in the hall. The more she saw the men watching her mother the more annoyed Jacy became. Not only were the respectable men like the bankers and the doctor watching her mother, but the unrespectables were, too: the farmers and oil-field hands and filling-station men. When her mother danced their faces lit up; when she danced they didn’t even notice. It was very insulting. Jacy decided that the next day she would point out to her mother that high-necked dresses would be more becoming for a woman her age. She could say it had to do with facial structure and all that, but it might not work. Her mother knew a good bit about facial structure too.

  Jacy was somewhat let down to discover that she had fewer admirers among the male community than she had supposed. A close count revealed that she had only two admirers who really counted: Lester and Duane. Sonny admired her extravagantly, but he had no money and had not been in the backfield, so he really just didn’t count. Of course almost all the sweaty little sophomores admired her, but they counted even less than Sonny.

  Since there was clearly nothing she could do about her mother, Jacy turned her attention back to the swimming party and guided Duane back to the farthest, darkest corner of the Legion Hall, where the couples most in love always danced. In that corner it was possible to dance very close, and an hour or so of really close dancing fitted in perfectly with Jacy’s plan. She had known for a long time that boys had erections on dance floors, at least when they danced with her—apparently it was just one of the little commonplaces of life that pretty girls had to put up with. It had never occurred to her that such a phenomenon could be useful until she began laying plans to get away to the swimming party, when she concluded that the thing to do was make Duane simply delirious with love. If he were delirious, and convinced she was on the verge of giving herself to him, then he couldn’t be too mad when she made ready to leave. The quickest way to convince him was by dancing as close as it was possible to dance; so grimly Jacy did it, pressing herself right against him. It was so creepy it almost set her teeth on edge, but the effect on Duane was very strong indeed.

  “Let’s sneak out to the car a minute,” he said, his breath hot in her ear.

  Jacy knew that wouldn’t be sensible. Much better to hold out the promise of a brief trip to the car after she had his reaction to her leaving. Then if he just had to be pacified some way, she could let him put his hand inside her panties. After all, he was very sweet, and had given her a fifty-dollar wristwatch for Christmas.

  “I’ll go talk to Mother a minute.” She said. “Maybe I can talk her into letting me stay out a little later tonight.”

  She left the dance floor and found her mother in the front foyer, but the circumstances were extremely surprising. Abilene had just come in the door and her mother was kissing him, right there in the Legion Hall. Not only was it a shock to Jacy, but even more of one to the short, pretty brunette Abilene had come in with. Lois was kissing him right on the mouth, and though he seemed a little flushed he was not trying to make her quit. Even when her mother broke the kiss she kept her hands locked around Abilene’s neck.

  “Merry Christmas,” she said, glancing at the brunette, whom she had not noticed. The girl was angry, but she was shorter than Lois and much younger and didn’t quite know what to do with her anger.

  “Uh, this here’s Jackie Lee French,” Abilene said. “Jackie Lee, this is Lois Farrow, my boss’s wife.”

  “Hello, Jackie,” Lois said.

  “I don’t have to talk to her,” Jackie Lee said, turning angrily to Abilene. “I think she’s just awful. What do you mean kissin’ her like that, I’m embarrassed to death. I ought to slap her face.”

  “You can’t even reach it, honey,” Lois said, smiling at her. “Is your name really French or is that just something you like to do?”

  Jackie Lee was absolutely stunned. Her mouth fell open. Nobody had ever talked like that to her before—she was the star barmaid in the tavern where she worked, and all the cowboys and airmen treated her very much like a lady.

  Abilene made an amused face and took Jackie Lee by the elbow. “I never come here to referee no fight,” he said, moving toward the dance floor. Jackie Lee went with him, holding her butt in indignantly.

  Lois snorted in amusement. “I know what I did wrong,” she said. “You’re supposed to have mistletoe.” When she noticed Jacy she snorted again and went into the coatroom. She had a flask of bourbon in her coat pocket and took a neat nip, fishing in her purse for some Kleenex. The dancing had made her sweaty.

  “My goodness, Mother,” Jacy said. “you oughtn’t to behave like that. What would Daddy say if he saw you?”

  “Nothing,” Lois replied. She took another nip and put the cap back on the flask. “He wouldn’t say a damn thing and there’s no reason he should. Kissing one another at Christmas time is a custom among civilized peoples. Beside, why are you lecturing me? What have you been doing bank in that dark corner for the last hour, telling secrets?”

  Jacy was taken aback. For a moment she couldn’t think how to reply. “I was just coming to ask you something,” she said finally. “Lester wants me to go with him to a swimming party in Wichita Falls. Is it okay if I go?”

  “Sure,” Lois said. “Have a good time. And let’s you and me just leave one another alone so far as men are concerned, okay? We compete about enough things as it is.”

  After Lois went back to the dance floor Jacy decided her feelings were hurt and stay
ed in the coatroom, sniffling a little. It seemed to her her mother had no sense of responsibility at all, and it was very confusing. Then she grew angry, jerked the bourbon flask out of her mother’s coat and took a tiny sip of whiskey in defiance. Like mother, like daughter, people would say if they saw her. She put the flask back and hurried in to Duane before the tears could dry on her cheeks. “Oh I’m just sick,” she said. “Mother says I have to go to a swimming party with Lester. I can’t get out of it now. It’s all her fault and I could just kill her.”

  Ten minutes later she and Duane were in the front seat of the pickup, kissing. The pickup was parked in a darker place than the convertible. Duane had been furious and it had taken all Jacy’s coaxing to get him out of the Legion Hall without some kind of scene taking place. Even when they got to the pickup he kept wanting to go back in and drag Lester out and fight him. Jacy quickly saw that she would have to go to desperate lengths to keep him with her. She sprawled across his lap, kissing him, and she didn’t bother to cross her legs and trap his arms with her own, like she usually did. He could dimly make out her white, half-exposed legs in the dark cab. When he touched her lightly above the knee she didn’t stop him. Wildly encouraged, he at once forgot Lester and leapt to the attack: he put his hand right on the warm slick band of silk that passed between her legs. She still didn’t stop him! It was a miracle of generosity!

  Jacy thought so too. She had never left herself quite so wide open before and she hoped Duane appreciated it. After a few nervous minutes of tracing his fingers delicately along the edges of her panties he got up enough nerve to slip his hand inside a leghole and touch the real place, which was surprisingly slippery. He had not really expected to arrive at that destination that evening and he was not quite sure what to do next. Jacy gave no clues. She quit kissing him and pressed her face tightly against his neck, not exactly sure if she liked what was happening or not. She was determined to go on with it a few minutes, though: it would never do to go to a naked swimming party in total ignorance of such matters. Once in a while Duane hit on the right spot and she couldn’t help gasping and squirming a little, but most of the time he seemed to be fumbling around in a rather pointless way and that made her impatient. She went a little out of it for a few minutes, waiting for Duane to hit the right spot and quivering with pleasure when he did. It was not until he took his hand away and tried to lay her down on the seat that she realized she had pacified him quite enough. He was actually trying to get on top of her! It was terrible of him to try such a thing when her head wasn’t completely clear—it was hard enough for her to finish the evening in the proper tone without him doing that.

  “No, no Duane, I’ve got to go,” she said, “Lester will be coming any minute.”

  She struggled up, gave Duane a quick kiss to show she wasn’t mad at him, and then got herself out of the pickup and into Lester’s Oldsmobile. She wanted a minute or two to calm down before Lester came out—the dancing and the courting had left her wet with sweat, and she wasn’t even sure but what she smelled.

  To her great annoyance, Duane got out of the pickup, his hair all tousled, and stood right on the porch of the Legion Hall, obviously waiting for Lester. After all she had given him, it was infuriating! When Lester came out he bumped right into Duane and Duane grabbed him. They had words, that was clear, but Lester managed to shake loose and came on to the Olds. The sleeve of his sports coat was torn.

  “What’d he say?” Jacy asked.

  “God he’s mad,” Lester said, panting. He was visibly scared, but he did his best to make light of it. “He called me names, hoping I’d hit him.”

  “Oh, he’s so silly,” Jacy said. “I don’t know what I’m going to do about him. He’s just so crazy about me he doesn’t have good sense.”

  “I’m not saying anything against Duane, but that’s a roughneck for you,” Lester said. “They never are very sophisticated about these things.”

  The farther he got from the scene the easier it was for Lester to believe he would have come out well in a fight with Duane. His emotions became mixed, and so did Jacy’s. It occurred to her belatedly that it wouldn’t have been so bad if Lester and Duane had fought over her. At the very least it would have taken a few people’s minds off her mother.

  They rode to Wichita in silence, each of them thinking out the kind of fight scene they wished had taken place. Lester imagined that he had fought to a standstill, contemptuous of pain, while Jacy saw it differently: Lester would win by dishonorable means, like kicking Duane in the groin, and she would weep on the sidelines. Then she would go and comfort Duane and drive away with him, contemptuous alike of money and parental displeasure, content to be ruined for love.

  It seemed a pity to her that Lester hadn’t had the guts to start the fight.

  THE SHEEN home, where the party took place, was a two-story, twenty-room mansion near the Wichita Falls country club. When they drove up several sports cars were parked in the long curved drive.

  “This may be the wildest thing yet,” Lester said, smiling at Jacy a little nervously.

  No one answered the doorbell, so they went on in. Lights were on and there were girls’ coats and boys’ coats and glasses and liquor bottles all around, but no people. A Dave Brubeck album was lying next to the phonograph.

  Once they opened the basement area it was obvious from the yelling and splashing where everyone was.

  “Yep, they’re naked,” Lester said when they arrived downstairs. He left Jacy in the ping-pong room a minute and peeked into the pool. She found the prospect of walking into a room full of naked city kids somewhat frightening, but she determined to do it and look delighted, whatever she might feel. She let Lester hold her hand when they walked in, and that was something she didn’t permit very often.

  At first it was not especially startling, because all the Wichita kids were in the water, having water fights and cutting up. You couldn’t see what ordinarily you were not supposed to see. There were about six boys and six girls, most of them kids Jacy knew slightly from dances at the country club. One rather famous rich girl was there—her name was Annie-Annie and she was black-headed and notoriously wild. She was only seventeen and had been sleeping with boys for years. Her boy friend was Bobby Sheen, the kid whose parents owned the house. He was a very good-looking boy and had owned the first Ford Thunderbird in that part of the country.

  “Hey, look,” he yelled, when he saw Lester and Jacy. “New victims.”

  To Jacy’s embarrassment all the kids immediately stopped their water fights and swam right over to the side of the pool where she and Lester were standing. Bobby Sheen made a big show of jumping out of the water and shaking Lester’s hand, just as if he had been properly dressed.

  “Hi, Jacy,” he said, grinning and sluicing the water off his hair with one hand. “Glad you made it to the party. We’re dressed informally, as you see.”

  That brought a big laugh from the kids in the pool, and Bobby cocked his leg in acknowledgment. Jacy laughed too, though a little thinly. She was trying not to look at Bobby’s penis, or at anybody’s penis.

  Annie-Annie got out of the pool too and walked over to them. She was a tall, willowy girl, very graceful. Having her out of the water embarrassed Jacy almost as much as having Bobby out. Streams of water dripped off Annie-Annie’s breasts and ran down her stomach into her black pubic hair. She didn’t even bother to dry herself, and Jacy thought that most indecent. Letting drops of water shine in one’s pubic hair was certainly not a ladylike thing to do.

  “You two will have to join the club,” Annie-Annie said. “We’re the Senior Nudists, and we’ll let you join if you want to.”

  “Sure,” Lester said. “How much does it cost? I’ll pay for both of us.”

  “Oh it doesn’t cost money,” Annie-Annie said, grinning and still dripping. “You just have to be initiated. You walk out on the diving board and take all your clothes off, while we watch. You all willing?”

  “Sure,” Lester said, not looki
ng at Jacy. “We were just fixing to get undressed anyway.”

  When he asked Jacy if it was okay, she nodded. She didn’t know what else to do. She certainly wasn’t anxious to go out on the board and take her clothes off, but she couldn’t very well stand around with them on while everybody else was naked.

  “I’ll go first,” Lester said.

  All the kids got out of the pool and sat on the edge, kicking their feet in the water. One little kid surprised Jacy no end. He was by far the youngest, littlest kid there; he had freckles and a burr haircut and looked about thirteen, and he had on a green diving mask. While they were all waiting for Lester to untie his shoes the kid walked right past Jacy to get a towel. What surprised Jacy was his penis, which stuck straight out. It wasn’t very big or anything but it certainly was sticking out and Jacy thought it was just awful that he would walk around with it like that. A couple of the other girls giggled.

  “That’s my little brother Sandy,” Bobby Sheen said. “Don’t pay any attention to him—he’s not in the club. He just likes to swim under water with his mask on and look at girls while he fiddles with himself. If he gooses you or anything tell me and I’ll make him go to bed.”

  When Lester got out on the diving board, Jacy expected everybody to yell and whistle, but instead they just sat quietly on the side of the pool, watching. The room was so quiet that they could hear the gentle slap of water against the tile poolside. Lester had expected yelling too, and the silence unnerved him. He decided that speed was of the essence, and his disrobing was incredibly speedy. He peeled off his shirt, yanked down his pants and underwear at the same time, and in a second was in the water. Jacy was amazed at how quickly he did it. He swam over and pulled himself up on the side with the others, no longer the least embarrassed.